by Galia Ryan
“Are you sure?”
Suddenly her mouth went dry.
“Completely.”
“Of course. You’re here to argue against it.”
“A mistake,” she wrote. “I should never have entered the conversation.”
“But you did.”
“As I said: a mistake.”
“Perhaps you were reaching out.”
“For what?”
“Understanding. Approval ….”
She caught her breath. Furious. But he was still typing.
“… of your alter ego.”
“There is no other side to me.”
“We all have hidden sides.”
“And what is yours?”
She waited. Yes, his barb had found its mark, but at least she’d managed to deflect it.
“Why not find out for yourself?”
Alice’s jaw dropped.
Her heart was pumping. More to the point, her breasts were tingling and demanding attention. She couldn’t answer. Wouldn’t. Was he really suggesting they meet? Hell no! He might make her do things, things she normally wouldn’t dream of. Wasn’t that what this was all about?
Instead she typed, “So tell me, do you really subscribe to the theory that men are superior to women? Or are you here because like me, you have nothing better to do?”
“Which answer would you prefer?”
“I don’t care either way.”
“Then it doesn’t matter.”
“But it does.”
“Why?”
Because you are either full of crass stupidity or—and frankly this is something I’m beginning to doubt—somewhere deep inside there is a glimmer of intelligence.
And needing an unequivocal answer, Alice pressed on, “So tell me, where do you stand?”
“If I were a traditionalist, I would point out that according to the Bible, God created Adam first. Wouldn’t you say that suggests man has a greater importance than woman in the general scheme of things?”
Ah-ha! Now this was an argument she was more than ready for.
“But in that same order,” she replied, “plants came before animals. So does that mean a hollyhock has dominance over a buffalo?”
He didn’t miss a beat. “Or was it that vegetation was created earlier to ensure food and sustenance for a stronger species, the animal kingdom?”
Alice raged inwardly.
“Okay. We’re assuming here that Adam was the first of his kind. As with any new design, there is a requirement for a prototype. Thus we have the male model. Clearly a flawed product, since a different and more pleasing version was then created. I’m talking about Eve, of course. I’m sorry, but is this the best you can do?”
The message popped up that he was typing, and she found herself holding her breath.
“Yet without Adam’s rib, there would be no Eve. And of course, she was an afterthought. Something to do with his requiring a playmate if I recall.”
Oh! No way was he going to get away with that.
She typed, “A gross misrepresentation, and one concocted later by men, given Eve was the archetypal Mother Earth and already a dominant female in mythology.”
“And in some cultures she is also the moon. Man, of course, is the sun. Seeing a pattern yet?”
She huffed out an exasperated sigh and typed, “Are you trying to wind me up?”
“It’s hard not to when I’m enjoying myself so much.”
“So what is it with you?”
“Just having a little fun. So getting back on track, have you ever asked yourself why the vast majority of religious beliefs, regardless of origin, are patriarchal? As are monarchies and dynasties. Now, just why would that be?”
He was asking for trouble.
“Exploitation and manipulation,” she typed. “Not to mention brute force.” She had to correct a few typos before she sent the message. He was throwing her off balance.
“Oh, I see. And can I ask why then, over the millennia, women haven’t risen as one and demanded a redistribution of power?”
“They have.”
“Really? I don’t see it.”
“You’re expecting a show of strength or military capability? It’s not our way.”
“You prefer brain to brawn?”
“Far better than the other way around.”
“And yet it hasn’t got you very far. Let me ask how many of the senior executives in your company—that is, if you work for one—are women?”
Alice was ready to throw something. Of course there was an imbalance at Symes Cabot, wasn’t it the norm? Recruitment at senior level skewed towards guys who knew each other at university or played for the same sports team, or even attended each other’s weddings.
The whole locker-room thing had infuriated her for years.
“No answer?” he typed after a moment.
She remained silent.
“I guess I’ve touched a nerve.”
“So enlighten me.”
He was already typing. “Why don’t we agree that the human race is made up of complex individuals, each with their own needs and requirements? That’s why we form societies and from there, individual relationships. Dominancy comes into play when those more capable—and more often than not they will be men—are permitted by the rest of the group to rise and lead.”
He was well and truly under her skin. Not that his arguments were completely unsound, but she wasn’t prepared to give him the satisfaction of admitting that.
“That’s bullshit over-simplicity.”
Drumming her fingers on the desk, she waited for his response.
“Tell me, what industry do you work in?”
Now where was he taking this?
“Financial analysis.”
“Ahh.”
What the heck did that mean? Okay, her turn.
“What about you? Do you work?”
“Yes.”
“Well?”
“You could say I’m an analyst too.”
“Could say?”
“Could say.”
“You’re avoiding the question?”
“For now. Tell me more about you.”
“And if I’d rather not?”
“That’s your prerogative.”
She should end this end right now, if she had any sense.
“What do you want to know?”
What do you enjoy doing when you are not working?”
“I’m always working.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
She had no hobbies, nothing else that consumed her. Numbers had always been her passion, and in particular the cohesion of structure and pattern. Randomness only invited chaos. But she could hardly tell him that. She didn’t participate in team sports or in any other social activity. She didn’t belong to any clubs, nor did she subscribe to any film or wine group, drama society, or political organisation. Somewhat dismayed, she looked around the room for inspiration.
“I read.”
That was true. When she had time. Though she couldn’t remember the last time she’d lost herself in a good book.
“And?”
She had an uneasy feeling she’d been judged and found wanting?
“That’s it. Like I said I’m far too busy for anything else. And looking at the time, that includes chatting.”
“Sure,” he typed. “Let’s do it again tomorrow. Same time.”
Over my dead body, she thought peevishly.
Chapter 4
Month end was always a mad rush and the demand for historical data and realistic projections often kept Alice at her desk late into the evening.
“Busy?” Daniel popped his dark head around her door. Besides being her current lover, he was the company’s chief financial officer and a senior executive. Alice had a thing for Italian-looking men with dark and heavily defined eyebrows.
“As if you need to ask. Are you after the March through June forecast?”
“No,” he said. “Though I’ll grab
it if it’s done.”
“It’s not. Give me another hour?”
“Sure. That’s not why I came down though.”
“Oh?”
Closing the door quietly, he came over and took the chair in front of her desk.
“Are you avoiding me?”
Alice blinked.
“Why on earth would you think that?” she said, trying for a look of complete bafflement.
“It’s not polite to answer one question with another one. Did your mother never tell you that?”
Alice searched his face, looking for clues.
“My mother told me a lot of things—including never to get involved with a married man.”
“A wise woman.”
“As it turns out.”
His hand was resting on his leg. Thick wristed, and with a delicious smattering of hair on the back and between the first and second knuckle of each tapering finger, it was well shaped and incredibly masculine. Alice considered how powerful it looked. How strong.
And wondered how it would feel to be bent over his knee, skirt bunched up and lacy panties caught around her ankles, her naked bottom pert and ready for punishment. Would that same hand come down hard enough to make her cry out? Would it caress her first? Run its palm lovingly over her quivering flesh, as if doubting the need for chastisement, even as he slipped a finger between her legs to probe for signs of wanton behaviour? She would hold still, allowing his investigation to be carried out without hindrance while his touch alone was enough to make her gasp and want more ….
Alice blinked, swallowed. And blushed.
What the hell had gotten into her?
“Dinner later?” he asked.
Pulling herself together, she nodded. It was looking to be another long day, and if nothing else it would make a pleasant change from the amount of takeout she’d had lately. Plus, they would no doubt end up back at her place, where she had a decent Australian Shiraz waiting to be opened.
“Lorenzo’s at seven thirty?” he suggested, getting up and leaning over her desk. “I’ll have the drinks ready.”
It really wasn’t a good idea allowing the relationship to drag on, but she’d caught the scent of his cologne. Clean and sharp, lemon and bergamot. All it had taken was just one whiff to remind her just how attentive he could be in bed. And right at the moment she was in dire need of a good fuck.
“Then I’d better not be late,” she countered.
Chapter 5
The restaurant was busy, but not enough that she didn’t immediately spot him leaning against the bar.
“Perfect timing.”
He was holding out a welcoming tumbler. Colleague to colleague.
“Thanks.”
It was all very polite and circumspect. No kiss or lingering touch, for by necessity such gestures had to be avoided, at least in public.
“Are you hungry? Shall we find our table?” he said, glancing over his shoulder into the body of the room. “Or are you happy to remain here for a while.”
“I’m actually happy to be on my feet.”
“In that case, give me your coat.” He eased behind her while she pulled her arms from the sleeves. “Did you finish all you wanted to?”
“Most of it.”
“Good. Should be an interesting meeting this week, especially with the latest positioning of the European currencies. Did you hear Gerald’s going?”
“No!” Her head shot up in surprise.
“Came as a shock to me too,” Daniel said, folding and passing her coat to a waiter to be deposited elsewhere.
Alice picked up her bourbon again and closing her eyes, savoured not only the rich smoky flavour of the Kentucky liquor, but also the immediate hit.
“God, I needed that. Gerald? Wow! He’s been with the company for years. Do you think they’ll replace from within, or recruit? It won’t be easy at that level.”
“External is my guess. Fresh ideas and all that.”
“Probably not a bad idea.”
Daniel was smiling. “Look, would you mind if we sat down after all? We need to talk.”
Surely this was nothing to do with the departure of Gerald Davis?
It wasn’t.
He suggested they order first, and it was only when they were alone afterwards that Daniel reached across the table and took her hand. The thought came from nowhere that he had made exactly the same move on their first evening together.
“I know this sounds far too much like a cliché, but you really do deserve better,” he said.
He appeared to be examining her fingers.
“Do I?”
“Yes.”
Alice studied the fine lines at the corner of his eyes and the darkening shadow along his jawbone. Was it her imagination, or was he looking a little tired?
“So much more than I can ever give you, anyway,” he continued. “If there was any other way …. God, this hurts.” He lowered his head.
Alice gawped in astonishment. She couldn’t believe it. He was breaking up with her? He couldn’t be! She was the one who planned to end it. She was the one who was bored.
His thumb was rubbing gently over her knuckles.
“It seems even crazier because we’re so good together.”
Alice snatched her hand away.
“Alice ….” It was as if he couldn’t fathom how it had come to this.
“Are you telling me it’s over?” she demanded.
“If there was any other way …. I never wanted to hurt you. You must know that.”
“Hurt me? Daniel, you think too highly of yourself.”
He stiffened and his eyes narrowed, but he said nothing.
“You recall our first evening?” She was in control once more.
“Of course … but ….”
“I thought you understood.”
Now he was shaking his head. Pain was etched between his luxuriant brows.
“Sex, Daniel,” Alice explained patiently. “That’s all there’s ever been between us.”
“Of course. But that was back then. We had no idea how things would turn out.”
“Not for me.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t believe it. What we had was more than that.”
“No, Daniel. We simply fulfilled each other’s needs. For me it was nothing more than physical relief. And you? Well, you can’t say it wasn’t a pleasant little fling, can you?” Alice ignored that he was looking as if he might choke. “However, I agree with you that this way is best. And mutually beneficial. You see, had you not made the move, I would have.”
She could see he wasn’t sure whether to believe her or not, and so she laid her hand on his arm.
“Like you said, we’ve had fun. But all good things must come to an end, and at least we can be civilised about it.” Then, seeing their waiter approaching with their first course, she draped her napkin across her lap.
“Now tell me everything you know about Gerald.”
Chapter 6
The first thing Alice did upon letting herself into her apartment was to chuck her bag at the sofa. The second was to let out an exasperated scream.
The third was to stride into the kitchen and take the JB from one cupboard and a heavy crystal glass from another. Then she turned to the freezer, and yanking open the door, thrust her hand inside the icy compartment to grab the blue plastic ice tray. A vicious twist, and two frozen cubes rattled in the bottom of her glass. Then she added a decent splash of liquor.
The drink hit the spot immediately, though the mouthful that followed was perhaps a little too soon. Glass in hand, she went over to the window and leaned against the metal frame to look out at the night. Over the years, gentrification had created a desirable address out of what had once been an area of disused factories and rundown warehouses. Although having only one bedroom, her third floor conversion lacked the liveable space of other apartments, but it still had a view—perhaps not a spectacular one, but pleasing nonetheless. Especially at night. Shadowy rooftops, pools of sod
ium yellow street lighting, and in the distance, as if global warming wasn’t a factor for concern, high-rise office blocks lit up like Christmas trees.
She checked her wristwatch.
It was just after ten, and still seething from the ignominy of being dumped, she was ready for a spot of confrontation.
The question was, would he be online?
“We meet again,” she typed, having relished the surge of adrenaline on finding the green light beside his username.
“You came back.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
Her heart was pounding. This was more like it.
“Still testing the waters?” he typed.
“???”
“This site. Dominants and submissives. Role play.”
“That’s not why I’m here,” she typed.
“No? Then why are you?”
“Bad day,” she wrote.
“Why?”
“It’s month end. That means additional work.”
“Is that really all your life consists of? Work?”
“As a matter of fact, I’ve been out for dinner.”
“A date?”
“No. A colleague.”
“An affair of the heart?”
Mmm. Well, let’s see what he has to say to this.
“Until earlier today,” she typed.
“And now it’s over?”
“Yes.”
“Your decision?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“It was becoming tedious.”
“That sounds harsh. Are you so easily bored?”
“Only by men.”
Alice smiled and reached for her glass. Suck on that one, honey!
“You find them disappointing?”
“Eventually.”
“And women?”
“No problem.”
“But those relationships are platonic.”
“Of course,” she typed.
“Why do you dislike men so much?”
“I don’t dislike them.”
“Your attitude suggests otherwise.”
“And that offends you?”
“No,” he typed, “but if you find those you choose are always coming up short, you might consider that you are targeting the wrong type.”
“Meaning?”
“Those who present no challenge to you.”
She frowned. But he was still typing.