by Barbara Goss
“I won’t say it, you know, “Luke brushed her tears away with his finger.
“Won’t say what?” She sniffled.
“I told you so!” he whispered.
Amanda buried her head in the breast of his shirt and cried, “I need a hug!”
He squeezed her to him. “You got it!” He then held her at arm’s length and smiled. After all, what are friends for?”
That night after supper, while Ruby sat by the fire, listening to Robert and Jared’s stories, and Luke, Jack, and Aaron were caring for the horses, Amanda signaled Helen into their tent.
Sitting on her blanket and patting the space beside her, “Sit down, Helen,” Amanda invited. “I have some shocking news.”
“What is it?” Helen asked, eyes wide. Amanda retold the tale of the wagon train as Luke had earlier that day.
“Charles dead? I can’t believe it!” She kept repeating. “Good gracious! If I hadn’t made the decision to stay with you and clean up my life… If it hadn’t been for Celia… I’d have been on that train, too!”
“Really makes you think, doesn’t it? We have a lot to be thankful for.”
Helen shook her curly red head. “I never put much thought to God and such, and now already miracles are happening to me. I feel loved for the first time in my life. He saved a wicked gal like me in more ways than one!” She cast her eyes upward, “Thank You, Lord. I’ll try, from now on, to be worthy of Your love.”
“Amen,” whispered Amanda. After several seconds of silence, Amanda said, “Helen, may l ask you about Ruby?”
Helen smiled and winked knowingly. “I wondered how long it would take. I would have been disappointed if you hadn’t asked.”
“Why?” Amanda tipped her head curiously.
“I could see that her presence bothered you, and I’ve been dying to give you advice about it.”
“You noticed? I don’t understand why I feel animosity toward her; I really don’t.”
“Could it be because of Luke?” When Amanda didn’t answer, but merely shrugged, Helen patted her hand. “You needn’t answer, but let me assure you, Ruby is not Luke’s type. She has him completely fooled. She came with us of her own free will; she wasn’t coerced. She was a saloon girl in Saint Louis, and she’s aware that I know it. She continually gives me warning looks and tries to butter me up to keep me silent. She offered to do my laundry this morning! Of course I refused.”
“But she’s so pretty and vivacious.” Amanda sighed. “All the men dote on her, including Luke. He’s my friend. I’d not want to see him hurt, is all.”
“Luke isn’t stupid. He isn’t even attracted to her. It’s just flattery for him. And she isn’t half as lovely as you are! Her beauty isn’t natural like yours. Look at all the makeup she spreads on every morning.” Helen shook her head, “I tell you you’re worried for no reason. Luke is kind to Ruby, but has eyes only for you. Even an old maid like me can see that!”
Helen eyed Amanda suspiciously. “I also think your interest in Luke is beyond friendship. You can’t fool me.”
“I’m not trying to fool you. I’m just confused about my feelings. My only concern is to find a way to California. I don’t have room in my plans for anything more than friendship.”
Helen pinched Amanda’s cheeks gently. “I think you should examine your priorities. You’ll be mighty lonely in Frisco if your feelings for Luke are as I suspect they are.”
Helen’s words reflected exactly what Amanda’s recent thoughts had been. “Is it possible to have both? Luke and San Francisco?” Amanda wrung her hands nervously. “Oh, Helen, what should I do?”
“Let Luke know you think of him as more than just a friend. He needs encouragement.”
“I don’t know how to do that.” Amanda looked up at Helen quickly and exclaimed in a panicky voice, “You won’t say anything to him, will you?”
Helen took Amanda’s hands in hers. “You can always trust me. Not only is your secret safe, I’ll do anything I can to help. I’m proud that you confided in me.”
Amanda threw her arms around Helen. “I’m so glad things worked out as they did. I’m happy you changed your plans and came with me.”
“Me, too!” Helen laughed. “Especially since I heard what happened to our wagon train!”
At first Helen had balked at wearing the two dresses belonging to Amanda’s mother that Amanda had dug from the clothing Luke rescued from her wagon.
“They aren’t my style,” Helen objected as she examined them. However, after a week in the same dress, she had begun wearing them just while her dress was being laundered. Now of course, with the rips and tears the rugged terrain had made in her clothes she wore the practical dresses and was thankful for them. More and more Amanda noticed the dresses no longer looked foreign on her, for every day Helen became increasingly like those dresses.
Since hearing about Larsen’s wagon train, Amanda had changed, too. Her prayers were no longer strained. Her relationship with God had returned to a sure footing.
Amanda’s only battle now was her feelings for Luke. What she had wished was just friendship began to feel much stronger, especially when Ruby was around. What is love? She wondered. That thrill and goose bumpy feeling I got whenever Charles touched me? Or the warm glow I feel whenever I’m around Luke?
There was little time for socializing as they traveled, for the Sterlings were all business. Their objective was to get to the ranch safely, and they concentrated fully on that. The after supper fireside was the only opportunity to get to know one another. The men seemed to enjoy telling Ruby stories and joking with her. Amanda knew Ruby’s beauty attracted them, but she also had an ability to make them feel masculine. Ruby had the art of flirting down pat. Though Amanda vowed to like Ruby, it became harder as she monopolized not only all the other men’s attention, but Luke’s, too.
11
Amanda bit her lower lip and tried to smile as she rode past Ruby and Luke to reach Helen’s side. She always rode beside Helen. Ruby began the day riding with the women but always managed to lag behind so she could be near Luke or Robert, who took turns riding at the rear of the traveling party
Helen took in Amanda’s forced smile and motioned with her facial expression for Amanda to ride closer to her.
“Ruby getting on your nerves again?” Helen asked.
“It’s my fault. It shouldn’t bother me. But doesn’t Luke realize how she irks me?” Amanda asked. “He could put a stop to her flirting if he wanted to. He must be enjoying it!”
Helen hesitated before saying, “It’s none of my business, but isn’t it possible that he’s allowing it on purpose, just to see if you care?”
“You think he is?” she asked hopefully. “He isn’t truly enjoying Ruby’s company?”
“I doubt it,” Helen said with more assurance than she felt.
“What do you think I should do?” Amanda asked, opening her innocent eyes wide.
“Depends.”
“On what?”
“Do you want Luke to know you’re in love with him?”
“You think I am in love with him?”
“It certainly appears that you are.”
“But how do I know for sure?”
Helen thought for a moment, and then said, “If a coach drove up right now and offered you a safe ride to Aunt Hattie in California, would you go if it meant you’d never see Luke again?”
“Not ever?”
“Not ever.”
I’d miss him terribly.
“Would you go?” Helen persisted.
Amanda appeared panicky. “Oh, dear! I don’t know. I want to be with Aunt Hattie. I need to make my family’s dream of reaching the West Coast a reality. Yet to give up a dear friend and never see him again…” She bit her lip. “Oh, Helen, this is silly! It isn’t going to happen, so why must I fret over it?”
Helen smiled knowingly. “You don’t have to fret over it. We just got our answer, didn’t we?”
Amanda frowned. “Perhaps I do love him, but i
t isn’t fair of him to use Ruby to flush me out. I’m not going to fall for that trap. I’ll simply pretend it doesn’t bother me in the least.”
“Good idea, “Helen laughed. “You do that, honey. Let’s see what a good actress you’d make. It will be fun to watch, but I think you’re making a big mistake. If I were you---and I truly wish I had such a problem--- I would let him know how I felt and live happily ever after!”
“I couldn’t be so bold. Besides, I won’t be used as a pawn.”
“But,” Helen interjected, “what if we’re wrong, and he isn’t just using Ruby? Perhaps she’s using him. She’s a fortune hunter if I ever saw one. She flirts with Robert, too. I often wonder what made her decide to go with Luke instead of to California with the other girls. Maybe she fancies being a rancher’s wife. No, I wouldn’t trust Ruby one bit.”
“So you think I should throw myself at Luke to protect him from Ruby?” Amanda asked in amazement.
“Why not?”
“I couldn’t. It isn’t me. If Luke cares for me, then he’ll pursue me. If he wants Ruby, then that’s what he gets.”
“Good thing Luke didn’t feel that way when Charles proposed to you. You’d be buried back there with Charles and Bella,” Helen said.
Amanda gasped. “Helen!”
“I apologize. That was crude! You’re right, just ignore them both. There will be plenty of men to choose from in California. Rich ones, too!”
“But not like Luke,” she said wistfully, turning to look at him just as Ruby smiled up at him, flirtingly batting her long lashes. Amanda noticed Luke’s face blush as he smiled back and laughed at something she said.
Amanda kicked her horse ahead to ride beside Robert for a moment.
“When do you think we’ll reach the ranch?” she asked.
“A few days. Getting saddle sore?” he asked.
“Sore, yes. But it has nothing to do with my saddle!” she remarked before kicking her horse back to where Helen rode.
Amanda was amazed at how skillful the men were at providing food throughout the journey. Every night they had fresh meat, fish, or fowl. Tonight they’d speared several large trout.
When the fish was cooked and plates filled, Amanda did something she never thought she’d have the nerve to do. She boldly squeezed between Ruby and Luke just as they were sitting down with their plates.
Luke immediately moved over to make room for her. “Hey! What a surprise!” His eyes gleamed mischievously, “I’m so glad you decided to join me.” He put his arm around her shoulders lightly, in the gesture of a friendly hug. “I never get to spend any time with my good friend anymore.”
“That’s because you’re such a busy man,” Amanda remarked, looking in Ruby’s direction.
“I’m never too busy for my friends,” he said, emphasizing the last word.”
“That must be very difficult,” she said pointedly, “since you have so many of them.”
His eyes sparkled with challenge. He started to reply, then simply smiled, as if admitting defeat. The others joined them, and the conversation turned to the trail, the horses, and the ranch.
The next day it was Robert’s tum to ride behind the group, so Amanda didn’t have to wedge herself between Ruby and Luke, but rode beside Helen as usual.
“You said you couldn’t do it!” Helen exclaimed.
“Oh, you noticed,” Amanda said simply.
“I’m proud of you, “Helen beamed. “You missed the best part. You should have seen Ruby’s face! Especially when you nearly knocked her over to sit beside Luke! I loved it!”
“You don’t think I’m being cruel to Ruby? Or too obvious?”
“No, you’re just protecting what belongs to you.”
Amanda smiled. “I like the sound of that!”
When they stopped to rest at noon, Luke walked by just as Ruby was dismounting. Helen and Amanda watched as Ruby judged the distance between her and Luke, and then slipped just as Luke came close enough to catch her.
“Oh, my ankle!” she cried.
“Here, let me help you over to that log,” Luke offered. Helen and Amanda watched as Luke removed her shoe and examined her ankle.
“Why that no-good….“
“Helen, you promised to stop swearing,” Amanda reminded her.
“Snake! That’s the word I was going to say. Anything wrong with that?” Helen asked.
“No. It fits perfectly,” Amanda agreed.
Luke shook his head. “I don’t see any swelling, Ruby. Why don’t you just rest it for a while?”
“But it hurts terribly.” She fluttered her eyelashes at him boldly. “If you hadn’t caught me, I’d have fallen.“
“Stay here,” Luke said, “I’ll bring back some water.”
“Watch this,” Helen whispered.
When Luke reappeared with Ruby’s cup of water, Helen cried loudly, “Snake!” and pointed near to where Ruby sat.
Ruby not only jumped up and ran smoothly, but also shrieked like an attacking Indian. Amanda had to turn her face so no one would see her laughing.
Luke frowned at Helen and Amanda. “That wasn’t necessary,” he scolded, “I can tell when an ankle is injured and when it isn’t.” Luke turned and walked to where his brothers stood, amused by the scene.
Helen and Amanda appeared apologetic, but Ruby’s eyes burned with anger. “I’ll get you both for this,” she threatened. “Just see if I don’t.”
Amanda didn’t have to wedge herself between Ruby and Luke at supper, for Ruby, too embarrassed to face Luke, ate with Robert. Amanda didn’t dare confront Luke, for his look was unapproachable. Instead she carried her plate to a lovely cottonwood tree and prepared to eat alone, but Jared followed close behind and quickly settled comfortably beside her.
“Never saw Luke so angry,” Jared commented.
“You saw what happened?” she asked.
“Yes.” Jared laughed. “Don’t worry. Luke will get over it.”
“Does he care so much for Ruby’s feelings? Is that why he’s so angry?”
“I doubt it. More likely it’s his ego that’s hurt.”
“But why?”
“He knew Ruby was faking, but what could he do? By uncovering Ruby’s scheme you also bared Luke’s ego.”
“You mean he enjoys Ruby’s attention?”
“I don’t think that so much as what Ruby’s flirting brought out of you.” Jared chuckled. “But if Ruby stops throwing herself at him, as he fears she may after that snake trick, then he’ll miss your concern.”
“You think I should have hidden my feelings?” Amanda asked earnestly.
“No, I don’t. Honesty is always best. If that’s how you feel, you should show it. You also should know we’re all pulling for you. Don’t disappoint us. We were proud of you last night.” Jared stood, “Keep up the good work; and don’t worry, he’ll get over his pouting.” He turned to leave but called over his shoulder, “I knew you had fire!”
Amanda searched the breakfast group for Luke, and then nudged Helen. “Where’s Luke?”
Helen gazed around the camp. “I don’t know, I haven’t seen him since last night.”
Amanda again scanned the assembled group: Aaron, Robert, Jared, Jack, herself, and Helen.
“Where’s Ruby?”
“Good gracious!” exclaimed Helen. “Is she off with Luke again? That snake!”
Amanda stamped her foot. “Two snakes, I’m beginning to think!”
She walked up to Jared. “Good morning, Jared, I need to talk to Luke for a second. Know where he is?” She tried to sound nonchalant.
“He didn’t tell you?” Jared shrugged. “Guess he was angrier than I thought. We’re only a day’s travel from home, so Luke rode ahead to prepare Mom for us. He wanted to tell her about Celia before we arrived, so she could collect herself.”
“I see,” Amanda said. About to ask Ruby’s whereabouts, Amanda spotted her standing by the horse corral. For a moment she’d feared Luke had taken Ruby with him.
>
“So,” Jared was saying, “if all goes well, we could be sleeping in our own beds tonight.” He donned his hat. “You gals ready to hit the trail?”
Robert appeared with their horses and helped the girls mount.
Amanda truly hoped they’d reach the ranch tonight. She felt as though she’d been traveling forever. She nudged her horse closer to Helen. “What will you do when we get to the ranch?” Amanda asked.
“I don’t know. I’ve never done anything other than….”
“Do you have family anywhere?”
“None that would acknowledge me. What about you, Amanda? Still planning on going to California?”
“I’ve thought about it and have made a decision. If Luke should ask me to marry him, I’ll accept and stay in Texas.” She smiled warmly at Helen. “Thanks to your imaginary coach going to the coast, I realized I couldn’t leave Luke—if he wants me, that is.”
Helen winked. “Promise me you’ll encourage him a little. I think he’s crazy about you but is unsure of your feelings for him. Promise?”
“I’ll try,” she said. “Hush, now Ruby’s riding toward us. Let’s try to be pleasant.”
They both smiled as Ruby approached with a sinister look upon her face.
“I didn’t think your trick was funny, yesterday,” she sneered, looking directly at Amanda. She squinted when she spoke, and her lips were tight with anger. Her beauty had vanished. Amanda felt a chill run up her spine.
“If either of you knew me,” she lashed out, “you would have known better than to cross me and make a fool out of me. No one ever has yet and gotten away with it.” She turned to Helen. “I said I’d get even, and I will. Soon.” The brow over one of her half-closed eyes pulsated menacingly. “Very soon.” She slipped her glove from one hand and drew out a large hatpin, which she quickly drove into the hindquarter of Amanda’s horse. While Amanda’s horse reared with a snort, Ruby drove the pin into Helen’s horse.