by Meng QiYe
If Only Time Stopped at the Moment We First Met
by Meng QiYe
人生若只如初见 by 梦祁夜
Rénshēng Ruò Zhǐ Rú Chū Jiàn by Meng QiYe
Genre: BL
Novel status: Finished, 12 chapters
Translation status: Complete
Translator: RuiHun
Editor: Addis
eBook: EyesOnly
~~~~Brought to you by ExR~~~~
Warning, this story may not be suitable for all readers.
Rape, Suicide, BE (Bad Ending).
SUMMARY
* * *
The story of a seemingly one sided love between a school trouble maker and the class president.
Chapter 1
* * *
That year I was an eighteen year old year eleven student.
My scores weren’t very good, but I was good at fighting. As a result, I also became acquainted with many faithful friends, they all called me LaoDa[1] and obeyed my commands. Under their devotion and respect day in day out, I thought I was a real big shot. I was also a rich LaoDa. My mum died when I was very young and my dad went to America after marrying another woman. Although he didn’t want to talk to me, I was still his son. He often sent money back to me so I could spend it arbitrarily. My friends’ families weren’t very well off, so I often treated them to delicious food and they felt even more grateful to me. I was such a legend that everyone knew my name, in and out of school. Even the teachers didn’t dare provoke me and turned a blind eye.
However, our class president Li ZhenYun was an exception.
Our conflicts weren’t actually that intense at the beginning, when I was first allocated to this class, I was actually quite fond of him. He was very pretty and talked in a polite and cultured manner. He’d also blush every now and then, it’s just that a majority of the time he was completely silent and looked like a very introverted person.
His scores were very good and although he didn’t talk much, everyone liked him a lot. Thus, as soon as year eleven started, the class president was elected by everyone and he got the position.
On the other hand, my fondness for him also ended.
Back then, I was already used to my friends acting upon my every beck and call and bowing down to me. I was also used to people looking at me in fear and awe (actually now that I think back on it, it was mainly ‘fear’) but the days really were very grand back then.
Li ZhenYun just didn’t buy it though. He was in charge of disciplining and often had to carry out ideological work for full-time trouble makers. He would mainly lecture about big principles like how your parents didn’t have it easy, or how your future depended on yourself. Although he didn’t say much, it was very persuading. There were actually a few people who were so moved by him, their scores suddenly improved tremendously and they never caused trouble again.
Nonetheless, I just couldn’t bear the damn sight of him with his admonishing words and kind feelings.
I couldn’t quite put a finger on my mentality either, I just started to hate him when he became the class president. Even the things I didn’t detest before all turned into excuses for my hatred. For example, this guy really liked cleanliness. During the summer, people would sometimes go play basketball in white t-shirts. Everyone else was as dirty as a mud monkey while only he would be completely clean. My books were a complete mess inside my study desk, finding a book was harder than climbing up to the sky. A lot of the times, I would listen to the teacher’s class with my eyes looking up towards the ceiling. On the other hand, his desk was always clean and neat. Overall, he gave people the feeling of being ‘delicate and pretty’, which would then lead people to think that his books, his pens and his clothes were also very ‘delicate and pretty’. It really was a strange feeling. However, in my eyes, if a guy is always so clean every day then they’ve got a mental disorder.
You can actually just pretend someone doesn’t exist if you hate them, but the more I hated him, the more I payed attention to him. His scores were good so the teachers were biased towards him, the girls also seemed to like these types of cultured, handsome boys and would pass slips of paper to him every two or three days. Some even pretended to ask questions in order to get close to him. Humph. Don’t be fooled by those girls who seem very shy on the outside, I could see through all their evil plans. However, he didn’t seem to be interested, no matter if they were beautiful or ugly, enthusiastic or reserved, he wouldn’t respond to them. Well, all bookworms are like that. Nonetheless, I was very jealous of everyone liking him. Even though they were all scared of me, there weren’t any girls who would give me slips of paper.
If it was just this, then it wouldn’t have mattered so much. It just had to be that one day during self study when a friend of mine ran over to sit next to me to tell jokes. The class president saw this and walked over before telling us to stop talking. In my memory, he rarely talked to me. I even counted it up to a grand total of fifty four sentences. I didn’t think that when he opened that precious mouth of his this time, it was actually to tell me off. How was I supposed to endure that?
I looked at him coldly and deliberately took out a cigarette nice and slowly. My friend quickly lit it up for me.
I blew a puff of smoke at him and said in the tone I used when I fought outside, “Why would I want you to meddle with my business?” My voice wasn’t soft, the entire class glanced over. I glared at them and a few timid ones hurriedly retracted their gazes.
He violently took my cigarette. His voice wasn’t loud, but there was no doubt in his tone, “This is a classroom, you’re not allowed to smoke.”
* * *
[1] 老大 Means boss or head, the one with the most power.
Chapter 2
* * *
He really offended me this time, especially in front of my friend, how embarrassing. I slapped the table violently and got ready to start a fight. How xxx[1] unlucky, the Chinese teacher walked in then and called him over. She didn’t pay attention to what just happened.
I was definitely going to get revenge.
I waited until school finished. He went home by himself. There weren’t many people on the road. A few friends of mine stopped him and said that they wanted to talk to him about something. After that, he wasn’t given any room to resist as they dragged him over to a place that no one would ever go to and beat him up intensely.
What a splendid job. I didn’t even have to show my face, that was the imposing manner of a LaoDa. I excitedly asked the one who claimed to be the most ruthless subordinate of the lot, Wang XiaoYong, to tell me what happened. He recounted it whilst beaming in joy and added a sentence at the end, “LaoDa doesn’t have to worry about anything when we do the job. We chose to hit the places where he had more skin, after we finished with the beating we even straightened out his clothes on his behalf. We said to him: ‘now no one can tell that you’ve been beaten, if you dare to rattle out on us then I promise to remove an arm and a leg of yours.’”
I continued to ask, “Did that bastard say anything?”
Wang XiaoYong thought about it for a second and shook his head, “No. He didn’t make a sound at all.”
“Never made a sound?” I was a bit surprised, “He didn’t beg to be spared… or… curse a few times?”
“Nope.”
“Not even a groan or something?”
“Nope.”
I didn’t say anything more.
He really didn’t tell the teacher.
The day after he got beaten, he just limped and hobbled to class. The teacher showed concern by asking him what happened and he just said he fell over himself. He pro
bably didn’t even have the guts to tell his parents. Coward.
I thought he was scared, this was definitely a good chance to build up prestige to let the entire class know that even the class president was frightened of me.
But I thought wrong, when I stirred up trouble again, he actually walked over and looked like he wanted to go against me again.
Actually, to be honest, he never got mad at anyone. His tone was always very soft and carried a rather baffling hint of shyness, but I got annoyed from just looking at him. I didn’t wait for him to talk and spoke up first, “Don’t even try. I don’t yield to reasoning or force.” I walked out of the classroom as soon as I finished talking. I didn’t start a fight with him this time, after all, he didn’t anger me. I believed that if one wants to mingle in JiangHu[2], then they must obey JiangHu rules. It’s just that these rules are just too confusing. To tell the truth, I was a bit fearful of beating him up last time. I wanted to leave some leeway.
My conflicts with him weren’t too apparent, but he was the nail in my eye. I thought about how I was going to teach him a good lesson all day long, but I couldn’t think of a good way to do so.
Other than eating and drinking alcohol, my friends and I watched AV’s together. Honestly speaking, there weren’t many opportunities to fight. We could only depend on watching videos to fulfill our desires. My house was very big and I was the only one who lived in it. I lived happily and carefree.
We never did that kind of stuff before, but after watching too many of those videos we became extremely familiar with things like specific language terms, techniques etc.. Sometimes the videos were just too hot to the extent where Wang XiaoYong even wanted to go find a chicken. However in the end, he didn’t dare do it. We all thought fighting was what showed our power, if you went to find a chicken then you’d really have fallen too low. My brothers just weren’t good students in the teachers’ eyes, their words were harsh and they’d describe themselves like some sort of mafia figure. Yet if they were told to kill people or start a fire, they definitely wouldn’t be able to do it. That’s why every time we came to the end of a video, we would all solve it through □□[3].
One day Wang XiaoYong walked over mysteriously and gave me a video and said that I must watch it. I asked him what the contents were, but he said he didn’t know and that it was strongly recommended by the shop owner. I was dubious about it, “Their words are believable? Don’t they just want you to buy more of their videos?” Even though I said those words, I still called over a few friends to watch it together.
I never would’ve thought that when we watched it, everyone’s eyes would go wide open. A brother stuttered, “LaoDa, so men could also… do that, it’s actually true…”
No one knew what to say. I had only faintly heard people mention homosexuals back then. I thought it was just two guys who both didn’t like women and lived together like friends. When people said it, it was always with a scornful tone. I had thought it was weird, wasn’t that quite a pure thing? I even secretly thought about it. If they wanted to do ‘that’ then what could they do? Find a girl or solve it themselves?
I stared at the television intensely, so that’s how things worked! When I secretly looked at them again, I continued to stare at the screen without blinking.
That afternoon, one could say I gained knowledge.
It’s strange if I mentioned it, but after that, I became very interested with those kinds of videos and constantly told those guys to go buy some. At first, they would animatedly watch it with me, but not before long they became uninterested. They couldn’t just dampen my spirits in front of me so they could only whisper and say that it was more exciting to watch hetero ones.
* * *
[1] xxx For purposes of publishing, many authors choose to sensor out swear words so it is not reported and taken down. To respect the author’s work and keep it as original as possible, all censoring will remain.
[2] 江湖 JiangHu, in this sense it doesn’t refer to the JiangHu in WuXia novels directly but rather just means the network/society of thugs, gangs or troublemakers in schools who often fought.
[3] Boxes are another common way of censoring.
Chapter 3
* * *
One day, we were watching it together again. I watched it very fondly while they were falling asleep. Wang XiaoYong glanced at me and suddenly whispered, “If LaoDa likes it then you can do it for real.”
I was frightened and glared at him suspiciously. The others were also looking at him and he shook his hand, “Don’t misunderstand me LaoDa, how could we have the nerve to let you play with us. What I’m saying is…”
He lowered his voice, moved in closer to my ear and said a few sentences. I didn’t respond as my heart was beating like a drum. Deep within my heart, I faintly felt that he said a wish of mine that had always existed. Wang XiaoYong saw that I was quiet and softly said, “Is LaoDa afraid by any chance? Then let’s just not do it.”
This sentence provoked me, I glared at him and said loudly, “Who said I was afraid? It’s just that if that bastard can’t take the stimulation and reports us to the Ministry of Public Security, then things would be difficult to deal with.” By now, they all grasped what we were talking about and were a bit excited.
Wang XiaoYong laughed, “Rest assured LaoDa, we’ll make sure that he doesn’t say anything. Plus, if it was a girl they might even repeatedly threaten to commit suicide and keep on bothering you. If it’s just a guy who suffered a little bit of loss, it’ll be the same as getting a beating. How about it?”
I was a bit moved, on one hand I had always wanted to teach him a good lesson. On the other hand, I hadn’t done it before and so I really wanted to have a taste of it. Today this opportunity could be taken hands down, all I needed to do was to nod my head. My heart beat even faster and I couldn’t help but ask, “When?”
They all started shouting, “LaoDa agreed! Let’s do it this Sunday!”
I pretty much didn’t sleep well for the next few days.
It was that very Sunday, I was watching television at home but I didn’t really absorb anything I saw when I heard a few knocks at the door. I was a bit nervous, I opened the door and saw Wang XiaoYong walk in with a complacent face. I looked behind him and saw them propping a clueless Li ZhenYun up. His clothes weren’t neat like they usually were, his hair was also slightly messy, it was probably caused by the others. However, he was still very handsome. If I was to be placed in this situation before, then I would only feel jealousy looking at this beautiful face, but now for some unknown reason I actually had a very strange feeling. I didn’t ask them how they tricked him into coming, they had plenty of ways to deal with these kinds of gentle people anyways.
Wang XiaoYong slapped his face a few times, “Do you know why we had to trouble the class president to bestow us with your gracious presence?” Li ZhenYun didn’t say anything, he just glared at him in slight detest. Wang XiaoYong coldly laughed, “Out of all the things you shouldn’t do, you shouldn’t have offended our LaoDa. Luckily, he’s kind-hearted and just said for you to come and enjoy things for a while. If it was me, I would wish for you to go die! Why don’t you hurry up and thank LaoDa!”
Another brother laughed weirdly, “Later on make sure you serve LaoDa attentively!” Li ZhenYun’s face was a bit blank after hearing this but the fear in his eyes increased. Normally, he would always have a fairly expressionless face, this was my first time seeing a face that carried fear. In an instance I felt extremely stimulated. I thought to myself that I couldn’t lose face in front of my brothers. I had to bring out some toughness and cruelty to let him have a taste of how powerful I was.
I deliberately approached him in a slow and unhurried manner. I combed his hair down and then loosened his first button. Other than fear, his expression actually carried a bit of relief as well. He most likely thought I was only going to take his shirt off and beat him up. I laughed coldly on the inside, if that really was the case then I’d be letting h
im off too lightly.
I undid his shirt buttons and slowly went down to touch his belt. He wanted to resist but was held firmly by the others. I made my movements slow on purpose, an unexplainable pleasure made me feel fuzzy and numb. I suddenly understood why cats would play with the mouse to their heart’s content after catching it. I pulled his belt out and went to unzip his pants, the others held onto him firmly and were all watching with satisfaction.
I finally took off all his clothes, this guy who had OCD for cleanliness probably never stood before another person in his naked glory before. His cheeks were bright red and he didn’t even dare to lift his head. I threw his clothes to one of my friends. Wang XiaoYong pulled out a prepared camera and took a bunch of pictures. He glanced at the other person in shock and fear. He had no clue what we were going to do now.
The event that happened next was what really terrified him, I signalled them with my head, “You guys can go out, there’s no need to come back again today. I can deal with him myself.” Although they still wanted to watch, they could only leave after hearing my words. When they arrived at the door, Wang XiaoYong turned back and raised the camera up and down in satisfaction, I also gave him the thumbs up. This idea of his really was very brilliant indeed.
I violently reach out and hugged onto Li ZhenYun. Just before he had been locked in place by the others and now that his hands were free, he began to resist me desperately. But how could this weak bookworm be my opponent? I wouldn’t even give a shit if I was faced with two of the same kind. It wasn’t long before I pushed him onto the bed and immediately undressed myself. The split second I touched his skin, my entire body was overwhelmed with a shuddering euphoria.