Chase now had his hand over his heart, shaking his head. “Don’t do this. This has nothing to do with us, Lila. It’s all about him.”
She looked off, thinking about everything Chase was saying, and then took a deep breath. “Regardless of what Jack’s motives are, he’s still right. If you are going to attend Harvard you have to gain the tools to be independent and I’ve done nothing but stifle you.”
“You’ve given me the tools I need to move on from the worst time in my life.” He said, encouragingly. “A few tools that my brother could stand to borrow. I’ll never end up as unhappy as he is and you are the only person I have to thank for that. You don’t give yourself enough credit for how much you’ve done for me--and all of the other kids, too. Don’t say negative things about yourself in my presence.”
A lump formed in her throat as Lila thought about the weekly meetings she had with the grieving kids in school. She’d spent five years building a safe haven for them and they came in all ages, socioeconomic backgrounds and colors. Every once in a while a new face would come into the group and tell their tragic story, but most of the time it was the same ten or fifteen kids just talking, laughing and bonding, knowing that if they needed to vent or express their emotions that they were in a safe place. Most of them weren’t friends outside of the club, they maintained their own cliques and circles, but when they came together it was perfect. Organic. None of the students were forced or required to come, but they always did.
Many of the parents and faculty were against a “grieving club,” but Lila made sure that it was hush-hush, most of the students at Dalton didn’t even know it existed, and always kept her superiors up to date on how the kids were progressing emotionally. They all had each other’s phone numbers and hers as well. It was important for them to have someone around who understood what they were going through. They were a family. Lila loved those kids, and it killed her that she may have been failing them by allowing them to get too close.
Chase was watching her, quietly, his eyes wide with curiosity. “Hey,” he whispered, attempting to regain her attention. When he finally caught her eye, he smiled tenderly before reaching out and taking her dove necklace between his fingers. His eyes softened as she allowed him to play it between his fingers. “I know its Danni’s birthday today. Can I come visit her with you?”
“I don’t think so, Chase.” Lila blinked, running a hand over her face and reclaiming her necklace. “That’s so sweet of you, but… I really do think that this separation is for the best. You have to learn what it’s like to be in a world without the comforts of home. Cambridge is a long way away,” she said, shrugging. “I’m not going to be around and neither is Jack. Then what are you going to do?”
A long moment of silence passed with his green eyes boring pleadingly into hers. “You could come with me,” he whispered, so softly she barely heard it. “Come with me, Lila.”
Hearing him say those words broke her heart, because it proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that everyone around her had been right. Jack, Principal White, her friends and family who’d warned her about the thin ice she was treading on in taking Chase in so personally. For so long she’d thought that they were all just cynical, confused and didn’t understand the situation like she did, but instead the joke was on her. She’d completely failed him. Her eyes went to the closed door of the closet.
“I have to go,” she said, grabbing the door handle and looking over her shoulder. “Don’t follow me,” she added, before disappearing into the empty hallway with tears on her face.
---
Lila’s leopard print ballet flats jumped out at her as she walked across the crisp green grass on a bright Friday afternoon, staring at her feet as she went. It wasn’t necessary for her to look up as she made her way across the expansive field; she’d been there many times and could find her way around blindfolded if she had to. As she approached the familiar large slab of rectangular granite she came to a complete stop, gripping the flowers in her hand before plopping onto the grass with a thud, her legs tucked underneath her. She stared at the tombstone before her for a long while, pouting softly, before growling, “I’ve had the week from hell.”
After her outburst she felt almost completely refreshed, taking a deep breath and running her fingers over the sharp grass, smiling softly before looking up at the tombstone from under her eyelids.
“Happy Birthday, boobear,” she whispered, playfully. Her smile grew wider as she fell onto her back, letting her arms fall out to her sides as she squinted up at the shining sun. “I got you carnations even though you always hated those. The floral isle at Piggly Wiggly can only take a girl so far.” She turned her head in the grass and squinted at the calligraphy on the granite rock.
Danielle James
February 27, 1989 - February 27, 2005
Lila had chosen the calligraphy herself, and after all these years it still read beautifully, even though the lines at the top of the ‘J’s’ were beginning to chip away. She reminded herself to get it repaired. The grass made small pricks against her cheek, but it wasn’t painful enough for her to move her head. In fact, she rather enjoyed it.
“So he was right,” she said out loud, tracing the letters of Danni’s name with her eyes as she spoke. “I was too attached to Chase. And he doesn’t need me, anymore. Not really.” Lila lowered her eyes before quickly looking back up, hopeful. “Do you think I’m insane?” she asked.
With the inevitable silence as her only response, she turned her head away from the stone to glance back up at the sky. In all her life she couldn’t remember a day in New York City so beautiful. So beautiful that it almost brought Lila joy just knowing that Danni might have some small piece of something so breathtaking. The fact that this gorgeous day was happening at the end of February made it all the more sensible to Lila that a higher power must have been at work.
The sound of a roaring car engine broke her from her peaceful reverie and she rolled her eyes. Men and their stupid noisy cars, she thought to herself, turning her head to the parking lot about twenty feet away. Her breath caught in her throat when she saw a black Lexus SUV pulling into the only handicap parking spot.
“Oh, Danni,” she spoke into the cool air. “The gods of fate can’t possibly hate me this much.” When she saw Jack’s long body climb out of the truck, clad in his signature flawless suit and clutching a bouquet, Lila almost laughed. “I guess they can. Okay, don’t panic, maybe he won’t--” Jack looked up, from twenty feet away, and locked eyes with her. “See us,” Lila finished.
The man was in a cemetery in the middle of the day, surrounded by death and sadness, and still she was the first thing he managed to see? One part of her wanted to get up and hurry away, another part of her hoped that if she lay still enough she might be able to sink right into the earth below her, never to be heard from, again.
She saw Jack hesitate, then begin to make his way towards her. There was something about the way he changed around her that made her feel like jello. The tough talking lawyer who’d put many a criminal behind bars and saved even more innocent people from them, hesitated every time he saw her. As she watched him make his way over to her she wondered what it was about her that scared him so much.
It had been almost a week since they’d gone head to head in his office and after the scene in the closet the day before, she’d continued to do everything she could to avoid Chase at all costs. She didn’t think she’d have to avoid Jack, too.
He strode up to her, squinting against the sunlight and coming to stop a few feet in front of her, taking another small step forward when she curled her body up into a seated position with her legs tucked under her bottom, craning her neck up to see him. Shards of green grass sprang from her dark hair in every possible direction.
As Lila gazed up at Jack she tucked her fingernails into the soil below her. “Hi,” she said, willing to be the bigger man and say hello.
“Hi.” Jack didn’t smile, but he didn’t seem to be in a hurry to
move, either. He couldn’t make sense of his ridiculous inability to stay angry at this woman. Just a week ago they’d been at each other’s throats, and now he could barely remember what they’d been fighting about. All he could think about was how beautiful she looked.
A dozen perfect red roses were held tight in his hand, the other was in his pocket. An uncomfortable amount of time passed between the two of them with no words spoken, neither knowing what to say.
Lila wanted to ask how Chase was, but instead she pointed behind her. “I was just…” Before she could finish explaining why she was there she realized that she was a woman sitting in front of a grave. Pretty self-explanatory.
Jack eyed the stone behind her.
Lila turned to look, as well, taking it in. “She was my sister,” she said turning back to him and pressing her lips together. “Um, it’s her birthday today, so…” She lowered her eyes. Stop talking, Lila.
“Sixteen,” Jack said, more to himself then her, as he did the math in his head. In the five years he’d known her, Lila had never mentioned a sister, let alone one who’d passed away at such a young age. The urge he felt to ask a million questions almost ate him alive, but he minded his manners, opting to stare at her openly, instead.
“Yeah.” Lila nodded, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, her eyes narrowing. “Um…”
“Well I should…” Jack motioned over his shoulder.
Lila jumped to her feet. “Yeah. I was just dropping off some flowers. So…I should--”
“Yeah.” Jack nodded, his eyes falling to her skinny jeans as she swiped at them, attempting to get all of the grass off. The green leaves tumbled down her long legs and flowered on the ground around her feet. He took in her leopard print ballet flats and almost laughed, but instead he felt terrible. It all made so much sense to him now, the attachment that she had to Chase, why it was so hard for her to let go and why she cared about those kids at school so much. He had no idea that she’d lost someone so young. He’d never bothered to ask. As realization washed over him he looked up and sputtered, “I have your jacket.”
Lila’s head popped up as she continued to swipe the last of the grass from her jeans. “My jacket?”
Jack told himself to walk away, let it go, but he couldn’t. “Yeah… the black one with the… with the thing…” He swirled his hand around the breast pocket of his suit as he pictured the ridiculous frilly thing that was attached to what would have been an otherwise perfectly fine blazer.
“Ah.” Lila nodded as she recalled her jacket with “the thing.” It had been the jacket she’d taken off in his office a week ago. The thought of that day embarrassed her and she violently regretted the way she’d behaved.
“I don’t have it with me. It’s at the house.” He was about to tell her that he’d bring it to her the next time he came by her place to pick up Chase and then remembered the present day. He’d cut off all ties between her and Chase and, in extension, cut off all ties between the two of them, as well.
“It’s fine.” Lila waved, gazing off into the distance. “I didn’t really like it.” Her eyes went back to him.
“I can take you to the house to pick it up. It’s just right up the street.”
“No.” Lila shook her head. “Really. Throw it out.”
He laughed, showing a set of perfect teeth.
Lila drank in the sight like water. He didn’t smile enough.
“I’m not going to throw it out,” he said, his voice laced with amusement as his eyes explored her face. “I promise I won’t bite.” He took a moment. “Well, I won’t bite first.”
“And if I do?”
“I might bite back.”
“You might bite back? All we do is bite, Almeida, of course you’ll bite me back.”
Jack’s head fell, attempting to hide the blush creeping to his cheeks.
Lila visibly wavered. It was true. All they did was bite…but it was her favorite blazer. It had been an impulse buy at Marc Jacobs and she’d sworn that if she was going to pay the outrageous price-tag that she would wear that blazer until it fell apart. However, the idea of spending more than five minutes alone with Jack shook her up so much that she was willing to take that financial hit, albeit painfully.
She was honestly afraid of what she might do if she found herself alone with him, again. After the altercation with Chase she was now more sure than ever that any funny business between her and Jack would end in nothing but disaster. And what if Chase had been right? What if this was all just some big game to Jack and the only reason he’d really fired her was because he was jealous of she and Chase’s friendship?
It had been a hard accusation for her to swallow then, and it was almost impossible now that she was looking Jack in the eye. She didn’t know him as well as she could, but after five years she was sure she knew his heart, and she wasn’t ready to accept that he could purposely hurt Chase in any way. He loved him far too much. Lila wanted to tell Jack that Chase was in trouble with school, but didn’t want to overstep her bounds when they were finally getting along.
Watching him standing before her looking as sexy as he did wasn’t helping matters, either, and she could feel her resolve slowly chipping away.
Jack sensed her giving in. “It’s on the coat hanger right next to the door. You won’t even have to cross the threshold if you don’t want to.” He motioned behind him with the flowers in his hand. “I’ll just visit my folks, then I’ll take you.”
Lila tilted her head at him, her eyes rife with indecision. Why was he doing this?
Jack wasn’t leaving there without Lila. Period. He’d decided it the moment he’d climbed out of his truck and saw her face. It was only solidified when he’d realized she was curled up in the grass visiting with her sister, so open and vulnerable. It had been like opening a book he was already fascinated by and being hit with a monster cliffhanger. He was dying to know more and he was done taking no for an answer.
“Think of it as a peace offering,” he said, wanting nothing more than to reach out and touch her.
Lila’s body spoke the words that her mind fought. “Okay.”
He fished his car keys out of his pocket and held them out to her. “If you want to wait in the car…”
Slowly, hesitantly, Lila took the keys, every bone in her body rolling with chills when her fingers touched his. He brushed the tips of his fingers over the back of her hand, lingering a second longer than just friends would, while holding her eyes.
Lila swallowed, unable to look away from his gorgeous face. It wasn’t too late to call the whole thing off, but as his hand fell back to his side and into his pocket, his eyes still on hers, she realized that she didn’t want to.
And she probably would bite first.
Chapter 4
They shared a quiet ride to Jack and Chase’s brownstone. As they walked up the steps on the quiet, tree-lined street Lila still found herself staring at it in opened mouthed awe. She knew they’d inherited the five-story, single-family mansion from their parents five years ago. The last time Lila checked it was worth a little over seven million dollars. Chase didn’t like to talk about his parents and Jack wasn’t exactly shouting from the rooftops about them either, but Lila knew that their father had graduated first in his class at Harvard Medical, and their mother had been on the board at Goldman Sachs. She felt like an idiot for never considering that their parents must have left a goldmine of cash for their only two sons.
She followed Jack up the steps to the front door, not missing how well those black slacks fit his long legs, before gazing back up at the brownstone. She had to take a deep breath as the memories flooded her. Apart of her missed Chase so deeply that being here saddened her.
Jack turned to look back while unlocking the front door, holding her gaze. As he held the door open for her, she found herself smiling at him, she stepping in. He placed his hand on the small of her back, leading her to the foyer. Her skin warmed where he touched her.
Her eyes roamed as J
ack closed the door and came up behind her. Vaulted ceilings and oversized windows gave the home an open and airy feel. The sun shining in made the polished hardwood floors shine. She took it in as Jack came up behind her.
His body emitted warmth. She felt like she was wrapped in it when he placed a hand on her arm while leaning over her. He hadn’t been lying, the coat hanger was right next to the door and as she watched him finger it off of the hook Lila took a deep breath. He didn’t wear cologne, but his scent was intoxicating and utterly Jack-- a mix of soap and pure masculinity. Her eyes fluttered shut for a moment then popped open when he spoke.
“Do you want to wear it today?”
She turned on her heel and caught the last seconds of a smile on his face. He was back to his usual serious expression, and he would have been the picture of pure business if his fingers hadn’t been fiddling with the fabric of her blazer. He was nervous. The thought made her smile as her eyes fell back to the blazer he held open in his hands. She bit her lip and nodded, allowing him to circle behind her and slip her arms in the jacket. After adjusting the fit his hands lingered on her shoulders, then slid slowly down her arms. He took a deep breath and willed himself to get a grip, pulling his hands away completely.
They’d barely said two words to each other the entire ride there and he already had his paws all over her. The woman simply didn’t have a bad angle. She was gorgeous when she was facing him and she was nothing to sniff at from behind, either. Jack took in the sight of her round ass just inches from the zipper of his jeans. He shoved his hands in his pockets to adjust himself and also to ensure that he kept them to himself. He wanted to make sure they didn’t grow a mind of their own with the woman he felt he was constantly treading fine ice with.
She tucked her hands under her hair and fluffed it out from where it had been trapped inside of her jacket. He watched, entranced, as it fell in curly ringlets down her back, imagining those curls brushing her bare ass as she rode him slow. No, fast. His hands went deeper into his pocket and he raised his eyebrows when she turned to him, attempting to appear nonchalant.
Lila's Thunder: The Almeida Brothers, Book One Page 5