And she hadn't had time to decide whether she wanted to do that or not.
She supposed it was a sign that she wasn't as mentally stable as she should be that she wasn't certain that that was what she wanted to do. In her first panic stricken hours, she'd thought a lot about doing just that, but she kept coming back to what Ronan had said about them being completely human and ….
Well, they couldn't be completely human! She knew that, but she was, and if what Ronan had said was true, then they were-at the moment.
So maybe it would just be human since that was the main ingredient?
She discovered thinking about it that way made it a lot harder to come to a decision, which brought her to the realization that she'd been thinking, from the first, strictly as a woman-not a woman who was a scientist. She hadn't, in point of fact, been thinking as a scientist from the moment the Sirians had escaped. Clinical analysis of the situation had gone right out the window!
That sobered her.
She'd been trying to tell everyone at the center that the Sirians were not only too important as representatives of their species to destroy them, but they had to think about the plans for the colony. They were going to be living among the Sirians-and she had seen firsthand that they could be a formidable enemy. She might not be able to convince anyone else, any time in the near future, that that was a fact, but she knew it for a fact. She was pretty certain that human arrogance would prevail if she even if she tried again to alert the colonists. Everyone would be so certain that they were so superior in intelligence and technology that the Sirians didn't represent any kind of threat that they wouldn't listen to anything she might say.
As completely alien as their shifting abilities were, she hadn't had that much trouble accepting the truth when it was staring her in the face. She had managed to convince Sissy with very little argument. The Sirians' ability to make themselves look anyway they wanted to look made them particularly dangerous, however, and she doubted anyone not as closely connected to the project could be convinced at all. They would underestimate the Sirians, maybe provoke them, and that could be disastrous for everybody.
She didn't just have an opportunity to begin to understand the Sirians, she realized. She had a moral and ethical obligation to learn what she could while she had the opportunity and to try to promote friendly relations.
Discomfort wafted through her at that thought.
She'd certain been friendly! Really friendly!
She'd been so friendly, in fact, that she stood a good chance of completely ruining her career as a scientist! No one was going to consider her objective when she'd been having wild sex with the subjects!
She pushed those thoughts aside. None of that mattered at the moment. The important thing that she had to keep in mind was that their species could be a threat to every colonist on Sirius and she had to do what she could to prevent any kind of bloodshed.
More bloodshed!
That brought her to the fact that she'd deliberately shut the Sirians out after her discussion with them about her possible pregnancy. Partly that was due to her fears about the pregnancy. Partly it was because she was still angry about her discovery that they'd been trying to read her thoughts and partly it was an instinctive need to protect her privacy.
The Sirians were still in lockup, though, and had been abandoned, completely, by the only human they had any kind of bond with!
Stupid! Stupid! That was the worst thing about thinking strictly as a woman and ignoring the scientist!
Humans hated being confined and they were from a society where they were used to closing themselves off from others and living in small spaces! Granted, the Sirians hadn't experienced their natural setting, but they certainly didn't live like humans did!
She needed to try to secure their release, she realized, before more damage resulted from their confinement! Truthfully, she'd been relieved that they'd been locked up and she didn't have to try to deal with them, but she couldn't afford to be a coward about it. She was the only one that could or would try to learn how to deal with the Sirians on friendly terms.
That settled in her mind, she left her quarters and headed to the holding area determinedly before she could lose her nerve.
* * * *
"Yes, I know they're being held until the colonial council can decide whether they represent a risk or not," Kate responded testily to the officer in charge of the colonial militia onboard ship, Colonel Stalvey. "That's exactly my point. I'm willing to vouch for them and to keep an eye on them and make sure they don't get into any trouble."
"You need to talk to the committee about that. My orders come directly from them. I don't have the authority to release them without an ok and, I'll be honest with you, I'm not inclined to let them go any damned way!"
Dread knotted in Kate's belly. "Why is that?"
The colonel gave her a look. "They got pissed off when we let the first batch loose and they weren't included-trashed the area we had set up as a Rec area for the prisoners. It took five men-on each of them-tasing the hell out of 'em-to get 'em down and lock 'em in solitary. They were just as pissed off when we let them out of solitary a week later and got into a fight with some of the other men in lock up. So now they're back in solitary confinement and if it was up to me that's where they'd stay until we get to Sirius. In fact, I'm considering petitioning to have them sent back to Earth. I don't think they're colonist material. They don't play well with others," he ended dryly.
"Oh no," Kate said in dismay.
"Oh yes, so run on down to the council if you want to, but I already gave them a report on those three."
Ronan! Kate focused hard on reaching out to him.
Kate! They have locked us in these small pods and we cannot get out.
Dax?
I am here also.
Jarek? What about Ronan?
I am here.
Irritation flickered through Kate as soon as she got past the anxiety that Ronan had been hurt by the taser. I thought you guys knew better than to attract attention to yourselves! I came to try to get you out and now I discover you've been fighting and they've put you in solitary confinement!
You cannot open the lock? It is on the outside, Jarek responded, clearly puzzled.
I'm not allowed to unlock it! Even if I could get to it, it wouldn't do any good to let you out! They'd just round you up and put you back in! We're on a ship, you know! There isn't any place to hide where they wouldn't find you.
We could change ….
That seemed to be Jarek again. Ronan was being unusually quiet-probably still totally pissed off! Don't even think about it! That wouldn't work here and it would probably just end up creating more of a mess! They'd take the ship apart looking for you and then they'd begin to think things I'd rather they didn't!
She calmed herself with an effort. Please, just don't get into any more trouble! I'm going to go talk to the council and see if I can get you out, ok?
Chapter Eleven
Kate had begun to think that the case was hopeless, and it was difficult to make the Sirians understand when they knew so little about the politics of the human race, particularly when she didn't completely understand it herself.
No one seemed to. Bureaucracy had become a monster of nightmarish proportions decades earlier and continued to grow out of control until dealing with anything connected in any way to the government was like moving through quicksand. Like the mythological Hydra, every head seemed to act independently and yet conspired together in such a way that there seemed no way of passing through the maze of red tape that had been created over the decades of ever tightening government control over every aspect of life.
Colonel Stalvey was in charge of the colonial militia, but he didn't have the authority to release a prisoner without an order from the council. When she presented herself to the head of the council to petition for their release, she was told she had to go through 'channels' and was sent to another council member-who had no idea where she was suppo
sed to go beyond the fact that it wasn't her call. Hours turned into days and days into weeks while she tracked down and spoke with first one member and then another until she finally found the council member who could get her petition 'in the works'. For almost a week, she was under the impression that she was merely waiting for that councilor to review the petition to secure their release, only to discover when she was finally summoned that she was to take the petition to six other council members for approval.
Then it would be reviewed by the entire council at the next meeting and ruled on … after a vote.
It took every ounce of willpower Kate possessed to keep her temper under control when she was told that. She sought Sissy out in the Rec room and settled across from her at a small table Sissy had commandeered where she 'people watched' much of the time since no one had much in the way of duties to perform until they reached their destination.
"This is why the world is falling apart," Kate said tightly.
Sissy merely lifted her brows, silently giving her permission for Kate to unload.
Their relationship had been strained since Kate had confessed about the Sirians, and Kate doubted Sissy would sympathize with her plight at all. It wasn't as if Kate had anyone else she could complain to, however.
"Still no luck?" she prompted when Kate didn't say anything else.
Kate plopped her elbows on the table top and massaged her aching head. "Oh! I'm making progress!" she said with heavy sarcasm. "Only four more approvals and then I get to take the petition to the council at large so that they can review it and vote on it … the next time they meet. If I can't get all six approvals before the next scheduled meeting, though, then I'll have to wait until the meeting after that."
"Well thank god they all take their responsibilities so seriously!" Sissy said dryly. "Just think where we would be if things were actually easy!"
Surprised that Sissy seemed to commiserate with her, Kate shot a look at her friend, trying to decide from her expression if she actually did agree.
"How are the … Sirians holding up?"
Kate chewed her lip. "They're miserable, angry, and deeply suspicious that they've been tricked."
Sissy shifted uncomfortably. "How do they figure they've been tricked?"
Kate sighed. "Well, I don't know that for a fact, but I can see where they would. Most of the others have been released."
Sissy shrugged. "Most of the others haven't been in fights in holding," she pointed out testily.
Kate felt her face redden. "They've been behaving."
"They're still in solitary confinement aren't they?"
Kate blushed harder but irritation had joined her discomfort.
"I rest my case! It's hard to misbehave when you don't have anyone to fight with."
"They could still give the guards a hard time," Kate muttered, "and they haven't … not since I spoke to them about it. They just didn't understand what was going on and they didn't start the second fight."
"No, they just finished it," Sissy said dryly. "I don't know why you're working so hard to get them out. Clearly they're prone to violence. They'll just end up in lockup again."
"That is completely unfair. You know as well as I do that they hadn't shown any disposition toward violence until they were thrown into lockup to start with. And, I might add, they were locked up to start with for something they didn't do!"
"Yeah, I know-for the actions of the men they just happen to be impersonating! And if the authorities had any clue of who they actually are, they would've been shot instead."
"Whose side are you on anyway?" Kate said crossly.
"The human side."
Anger washed through Kate, but she tamped it with an effort. "It so happens that I'm also on our side. It isn't in our best interests to throw away the opportunity to form friendly relations with the natives of Sirius!"
"Speaking of friendliness …. Have you figured out yet whether you're pregnant or not?"
She was almost positive she was, but she wasn't certain whether it was safe to admit that or not. She shrugged, evading Sissy's gaze by training her own at some distant point across the vast room.
"It might be a blessing in disguise," Sissy said thoughtfully.
Kate shot her a questioning look and Sissy shrugged.
"Well … it could be a connection. I suppose that really depends on whether or not we kidnapped princes or something like that."
Kate stared at her blankly. It hadn't once occurred to her that there was any chance that her Sirians might have powerful connections of their own on their world. She frowned, thinking it over. "In all honesty, I don't have a clue whether they would have any influence at all on their own clan. I don't know anything about the Sirians."
"Au contraire! You know that three of them are damned good in bed!"
Kate blushed. "If you're going to be nasty …."
Sissy settled a hand on her arm when Kate made to rise and stalk off. "Sorry! It just slipped out."
Kate sent her an angry look.
"I didn't mean it, ok?"
"Yes, you did. Maybe you didn't mean to say it, but it was what you were thinking."
Sissy flushed. She struggled with herself for a few moments. "You're right. I was thinking that you'd been sleeping with the enemy and you were hardly in a position to make any kind of sound judgment. You're biased, Kate, and everybody else is going to look at it the same way."
"They aren't our enemies, Sissy … yet! And we're going to be in a world of trouble if it comes to that. We're going to be pretty much on our own once we get to Sirius. You know that, don't you?"
"People aren't going to want to accept a species that's so different from ours! You know that, don't you? I mean …. Just look how much we've fought among ourselves! And we're the same species! Different races, different countries, different customs, different religions-all it takes is just being a little different and there's food for war."
"We don't have a chance of getting along if we don't try!" Kate said anxiously, settling in her seat again. "I don't expect to … save the world in one fell swoop, Sissy! I just think we need to make a push to start out on a … hopeful note."
Sissy stared at her for a long moment. "Historically speaking, we haven't done too well at that, you know," she said dryly. "Look what happened when the Europeans moved in on the American Indians. First they made friends, then they made war."
"And we could be a lot worse off if we start out with that same superiority complex!" Kate said tightly. "I might not know much about the Sirians, but I know enough to see that we could be the Native Americans in a showdown on Sirius!"
"Depending on how many of them there are."
Kate stared at her. If she couldn't even get the danger through to Sissy, who was a 'friend', what hope was there?
Sissy shook her head. "No. You're right. I know you are. I don't feel friendly toward them, though, Kate. I can't help it. I feel threatened and I just wanted to point out that you-we-are going to have a real battle on our hands-with our own people. You saw how they reacted when they got their first look at the Sirians! If they felt that threatened by three, on Earth, how do you think they're going to react to … hundreds, maybe thousands, on an alien world where they don't have the backing of a superior army?
"We're researchers, Kate-scientists! We don't know anything about politics-beyond the fact that dealing with the government is like pounding your head on a brick wall! You can't even get them released, for god's sake!"
"So you're saying we shouldn't even try?"
"I'm not saying that at all! I'm saying I wish to hell this mess had been dropped in somebody else's lap-somebody that might have a better chance of making things turn out than me and you do! I'm saying I'm scared because I know you're right and I wish I could just run away. I'm saying I'm totally pissed off that you didn't tell me so that I knew what I was walking in to!" Sissy said angrily.
Guilt washed through Kate, but she dismissed it. "You're right. I should have warned
you, but the fact is that if I hadn't gotten involved with them I wouldn't have known at all and you wouldn't have and it could've been a lot worse! Not knowing damned sure wouldn't have protected anybody! Knowing might not help, but there's at least a chance it will."
* * * *
Kate didn't know if it was Sissy's additional influence that finally did the trick or if she'd just managed, finally, to satisfy the colonial officials-or if they had managed, together, to simply annoy the council members until they got tired of seeing them. The bottom line, though, was that they succeeded in getting Ronan, Dax, and Jarek released.
Sissy went with her to deliver the release papers to Colonel Stalvey. He looked them over skeptically, looked like he wanted to dispute them, and finally simply shrugged and summoned one of the MPs to bring them out of holding.
As they waited, Kate discovered that she had very mixed feelings but the one thing that was dominant and shouldn't have been was that she hadn't actually seen any of the men in nearly a month and a half and she wasn't happy about the fact that Sissy was going to be with her when she did. She tried to shrug it off. She tried to convince herself that she was really glad to have Sissy with her for moral support.
She didn't actually realize that she'd been anticipating a joyful reunion with her 'mates' until they arrived and she found herself staring at three complete strangers. Her spirits dipped so sharply that the smile she pasted on her face felt wooden.
Ronan studied her face piercingly and finally nodded. What is wrong?
Kate shook her head slightly and glanced from him to Dax and Jarek. We'll talk later … when we aren't being watched.
Adaptation Page 19