by Eric Klein
After finally pausing for a breath, she directs us to go towards Luna City by the moving slideway and to follow the signs to the Bats’ Cave.
We follow her directions, and, as promised, fifteen minutes later we are signing waivers and getting a virtual reality tutorial before being fitted for tourist wings. As I look the wings over, it seems that flying here is more of a combination of BASE jumping and flapping your semi-solid wings to enable you to fly, than just gliding. A streamer is fluttering in a nice updraft in the center of the cave, and we can see a few people glide in the downdraft around the circular walls.
Putting on the orange rental (OK, beginners’) wings, we follow our trainer, Holly, into the main chamber. It’s huge. The floor is large enough for four or five football fields and it must be at least six stories tall (at least, that’s how many levels of windows I count). We see the people taking the slow ride up in the center of the cavern, and slowly flowing down in circles (clockwise) around the walls.
We follow Holly out to the center of the room, where she shows us how to get into the updraft. We follow her up to the top. Once there, we start our long and slow glide back to the bottom. It is something like swimming in the Dead Sea; you feel almost no weight, but have a desire to move your arms a bit to help move around (and your bottom seems to want to go higher than the rest of you).
On the other hand, watching Fay and Holly fly is like watching angels or graceful birds in flight, looping and soaring. Their respective orange and black wings make a lovely contrast against the rough gray ceiling. Beyond them, I see that part of the room is ‘roped off’ with colored laser beams with no one flying in it.
After circling twice, we land so Fay can visit the bathroom. I ask Holly about the ‘roped off’ area. She explains that it is reserved for practicing stunts and competition flying. While she is explaining, a young man is starting to do some loops and twirls. As Fay is not back yet I go up alone for another time up and round. Truth be told, it is fun but not as exciting as BASE. Since the room is set at natural moon gravity, you have plenty of time to maneuver. The rush of fighting gravity when you jump is just not there.
As I reach the ceiling closest to the practice area, I watch as the young man doing the practice stunts clips a light fixture, completely tearing off his right wing. He starts flailing his one wing frantically as he starts falling. I twist into a BASE dive, push off the ceiling to get momentum and aim for the falling kid. His flailing is slowing him down. I manage to catch up with him about two thirds of the way up from the floor. “Do you want to get out of this alive?”
Looking more startled by the question than scared, he nods his head. “But you are only in orange wings.”
“Grab my hand!” I reach out and grab his hand at the wrist. He grasps my wrist tightly in return. Talking to calm him I explain, “We are going to try and do a three-winged landing, sort of like one of the old Virgin Galactic launch planes. You just keep your left arm straight and let me steer.” Moving my right wing and legs, I start to stabilize us back into a glide. “OK, now we want to slow down, so I want you to twist your left wing to raise the flap and increase resistance while I compensate with my right.”
After what felt like hours of circling, but could not have been more than two laps around the cavern, we were about two meters above the floor. “OK, when I count down from five I want you to put your feet down for landing and let go. Ready? Five, four, three, two, let go, one!” Dropping the last 20 centimeters we come to a sliding stop and he falls to his knees.
As a small crowd starts towards us, Holly runs to him and Fay to me. Holly holds him and sobs “Jeff” over and over as she alternates between kissing and hitting him. Fay wraps her arms around me and just holds tight.
The flight master comes over and checks us both out. “That was some quick thinking. If he had kept his head he could’ve pulled out and gone into a spiral like a maple tree seed, but knowing him, he probably was thinking about how he would get his wing back, so I doubt it. You got to him before one of the rescue drones, which is good, as they are all being serviced and painted for tonight’s show. We tend to need them more on days with tourists flying than our regulars. Since I didn’t have a drone available, you really saved his life,” he says, and adds in a whisper, “and me a lot of paperwork.” He gives me a wink and an elbow to my ribs.
Holly comes over with him and introduces him as her boyfriend, Jeff. After all this excitement, Fay and I decide that we have had enough flying for one day and want to get a meal. We invite Holly and Jeff to join us at the Hilton Earth View Room.
Jeff says, “The food there is not very good and way overpriced. How about trying someplace we locals go? It has as good a view, but without the tourist prices.”
Now, if my travels have taught me anything, it is to listen to the locals about food – except when they are trying not to smirk while offering you a local ‘delicacy’ that they won’t eat with you. “Lay on, MacDuff,” I answer. “Damned he who first cries ‘hold! I’ve eaten enough.’”
With Holly and Jeff in the lead, we go to the Luna University cafeteria, where she orders each of us a Luna pie. I have had something called a moon pie back on Earth, which was just a fancy cookie made from two round graham cracker cookies and marshmallow filling. This was not that kind of moon pie. Luna Pie turns out to be a slice of vegetable and cheese pie, full of herbs and flavor. Holly explains that it was based on tofu and herbs, with added cheese, all wrapped in a light, crisp dough. It is delicious, but proves that the old jokes about the Moon were right – the Luna pie really is made from green cheese.
Looking at Holly, Fay asks, “So if you are students here, how was it that you were there and available to train us to fly?
“While Jeff and I are studying engineering for starship design, we work part-time guiding tourists, and at least once a week are in the Bats’ Cave for exercise. Flying helps clear my head for design work.” After pausing to take a bite of her meal, she continues. “We are working to have one ready when appropriate engines are available for interstellar flight. From what we see there should be one very soon based on warp bubbles, and they will need the rest of the ship. We plan to have that design ready. There is a lecture today at fourteen hundred by Captain Englehorn here in the university, so we rescheduled our normal flying session to the morning so we could be there.”
“I don’t think we have been properly introduced.” Looking over at me Fay smiles mischievously all the way to her raised eyebrow. “This is my fiancé, BJ Armstrong, and I’m Fay Englehorn. Would you like to come to dinner on the Venture and get a chance to discuss ship design with my father?”
“You’re Captain Englehorn’s daughter? Um, thank you, but we don’t want to impose on your vacation.”
Smiling back at Fay, I respond, “It wouldn’t be an imposition.”
Before I can continue the ceiling speakers come to life. “This is a reminder to all of the Bats’ Cave trainers and those preparing stunt routines: starting today at fourteen hundred the Bats’ Cave will be closed to regular activities for the Miss Universe Pageant flying demonstration. Those who have signed up as trainers please be sure to be there at sixteen hundred so you will have time to train the contestants. The solar system will be watching the results. Also, remember that tomorrow the stunt area will not be available in order to make more room available, especially after the pageant show tonight. We expect most of the tourists will want to try. Those who have signed up as trainers please be sure to be on time for your shift.” (so coming today was indeed better, as tomorrow there would be crowds).
Hearing the announcement, Jeff looks up from his food for the first time. “Thank you for catching me. I don’t know how my wing got caught. Until you came, I was trying to figure out how I was going to get it down more than worrying about how I would get down. There are always drones out, so I was not too worried, but when the Flight Master said they were all being serviced I a
lmost fainted.”
Trying to distract him, I ask, “How do the drones work?”
Jeff straightens up and visibly switches into ‘lecture mode.’ “Effectively, they are small zeppelins, about one meter wide and two meters long, with a slightly concave top and handles. They are programmed to try and get under the person, and add lift until the flyer can recover, or act as a cushion should they reach the floor. They save lives, but bones can be broken. I have been sitting here and wondering if they can be improved, as in my case I don’t think they would have worked even if they were available.”
“For that to work, you need someone to not struggle and fall off. How about having a few modified ones meant to grab, not just lift?”
Holly asks, “Grab? How? There were designs early on for something connected to the ceiling to reach down, or a net above the floor. But those were found to be bad designs when you have more than a few people in the air. They were too slow to get to the person in trouble and could hit or be hit by someone else in the air. And, changing the gravity didn’t work either, as people are not kind enough to stay over one plate their whole time falling. Plus others can get caught in the sudden updraft.”
Thinking about how crowd control works back in New York City, I respond, “How about equipping a few drones with security net guns? These drones would be equipped with more lifting capacity. They can get alongside or above the person in trouble, launch the net to ensnare them, and then land them gently where someone on the ground could help untangle them and check them for injuries. It would work for unconscious individuals and those who are panicking too much to hold on to a regular drone flying under them.”
Jeff stares up at the ceiling, “If we overcharge the lifting engine it would be both faster to react and able to slow down their decent, if not lift them. Heck, we can equip them with tanks of helium and extra balloons. Keep them at neutral buoyancy until we need the extra lift. That would make them faster to respond with less surface area to slow them down. Hm.” He taps his wristpad and starts jotting in the air over it. “That could work. We would need to do some testing to see how well it works.”
“Knowing the Flight Master as I do, I’m sure he would approve tests if it will prevent injuries,” Holly adds with a grin. “As you may have noticed, he hates the paperwork that an injury entails.” She and Jeff look back to the designs from his wristpad.
Interrupting the technical discussion, Fay says “OK, then I will leave you two engineers to think about it. Are you sure we can’t convince you to come to dinner? The ship will be mostly empty; we can sit with my dad and chat.”
Holly looks up from Jeff’s pad. “If you are sure it won’t be an imposition, then yes, we would love to see the Venture and have dinner with both of you and your dad.”
“Great, let’s say we will meet you at the airlock at eighteen hundred. I, for one, would like to get back to the ship and rest before dinner. Flying is harder than it looks.”
I quickly finish my dessert (the kind of moon pie I already knew). At a shout from a group across the room Holly looks up from Jeff’s pad and over at us and raises an eyebrow, as if to ask “what is that about?” We can’t make out much of what they are saying, but it sounds like someone shouted “TANSTAAFL” as they knocked over a chair while jumping to their feet. Realizing they were drawing attention to themselves, the group disperses quickly. I could’ve sworn that one of the women leaving looks a little familiar. I can’t get a clear look at her, as someone wearing a shirt with Che Guevara in a space suit trips over Jeff’s chair and lands on our table.
As I try to help him up, he pushes my hands away, saying loudly, “People must liberate themselves,” and stalks off. I take the squashed plates away.
When I return to our table, I hear Holly respond to Fay, “Sounds good. We will see you there later.” She turns back to Jeff and starts muttering in some sort of personal shorthand. I catch “lift coefficient” and “now where could we get…?”
Tired from the day, Fay and I head back to the ship. This time the customs process to “leave” Luna for the ship is almost perfunctory when compared to what we went through to debark, or even to return the night before.
Once aboard we head to the elevator Fay says, “Deck two, please, Vena.”
“Yes, Miss Englehorn.”
I look over at Fay, but she cuts me off. “I want to see how prepared Dad is for his talk today. It has been a while since he has been in a lecture hall.” The doors open and we step out. This corridor is bare; it lacks all of the plush carpets and ornamentation of the passenger floors.
“I gather that this is where the crew quarters are?”
“Well, actually just officers. The rest of the crew and staff are down below the passenger decks.” She touches the announcement pad outside of one of the unmarked doors. “Dad, it’s me.”
The door opens to a very clean and orderly room a third of the size of mine, with shelves of print books. Captain Englehorn is sitting on a reclining chair, a paper book in hand.
“Hi sweetheart, Mr. Armstrong. You two seem to be almost attached lately.” A big smile taking the sting from a father’s protectiveness.
“Captain, please call me BJ.”
“OK, BJ. And on social occasions please call me Dave. Captain seems a bit formal for someone so attached to my daughter. But I would appreciate if you would help keep discipline other times.” He winks as he stands up and reaches out his hand.
We shake. “Agreed.” (This time my wristpad stays on.)
“Please sit down.” He pulls out the desk chair for me while Fay sits on his bed.
“Dad, I understand that you will be lecturing at Luna University in an hour.”
“How did you find that out? It was supposed to be a secret, a chance to practice my plenary talk in front of a live audience.”
“We had lunch with two of your fans at the university today. They were gushing about it.”
“Oh, that reminds me. Dad, I invited them to join the three of us for dinner. They are doing a starship design -” Cough. “And after BJ saved …” She is unable to continue speaking as a coughing fit overtakes her.
I jump up and pull Fay off the bed as it bursts into flames.
Vena’s voice comes over the speakers. “Reducing oxygen in this room to fifteen point nine percent.”
I’m holding Fay as she coughs. “Dave, don’t you need something to put out the flames?”
“No, BJ, fire needs at least sixteen percent oxygen to burn, and we can get by on fifteen percent for a little while without any problems. This is how we deal with fires on spaceships.” Even as he speaks, the flames start to die down.
“Fifteen point nine percent reached, captain.”
“Thank you, Vena. Now let’s see what happened.”
He pulls out the now scorched bed and a glass falls to the floor. “I was wondering where my glass went. I figured it was recycled by housekeeping.”
I pick up the glass, remembering my high school chemistry classes (and the kid who stuck his nose into a strong-smelling beaker). I wave my hand over it to get the smell of some of the contents. “What were you drinking?”
“I had a glass of Scotch last night before bed.”
“This doesn’t smell like Scotch. In fact, it doesn’t smell like any drinking alcohol.”
Now that the bed is completely out of the way we can see that a cover panel is missing and the wall around it is still a little damp.
“Ah, seems that some of it got into the electric outlet and caught fire, igniting my cotton sheets.”
By now Fay has stopped coughing and leans in to take a look. “Dad, where are the screws that are supposed to keep this panel closed?”
“Vena, has anyone been in my cabin while I was away?”
“I have two entries, both from housekeeping. But I see that one of them is at the same time as the same cre
w member was logged into a passenger’s room.”
Fay looks concerned. I ask “Vena, do you have any recordings of who entered here?”
“I’m sorry BJ, I don’t have cameras in the crew quarters or hallways, and before you ask, I only keep logs of the elevator usage to the bridge.” Interrupting herself, “Captain, it is now 13:30.”
“Thank you, Vena, would you please have maintenance come repair this, and then have housekeeping clean the cabin.”
“Daddy, this is beginning to worry me.”
“That’s OK, sweetheart. I’m fine. But I need to leave if I’m going to make it on time to give my lecture. We will dig into this later.”
With her holding him tight, we walk him to the main airlock.
Once Dave has left the ship we decide that a nice session in the empty spa would help us recover from the scare and from using our muscles in new and different ways.
They have a special offer of an hour on the latest Mirror Massage™ tables, so I decide to give one a try. While the masseuse is working on part of my back, the table reverses the gravity under the part of the body that is being massaged. pushing up against the masseuse’s hands. At first, it fells strange as if that part was disconnected from the rest of me. But, when she is done, you could pour me out the door. The gravity effect had helped the muscles relax more than any massage I had previously experienced.