Raze blacked out the car and pulled it into a thicket of bushes and shrubs, hiding it as best he could.
“We’ll need to get a clean one first thing when we leave,” he said flatly as he covered it with some leafy branches. When he finished, Aislen led him down into the gardens.
She had never come into the grounds this late at night. The isolation felt total, the atmosphere even more sacred. They walked the long stretch of greenbelt that lay between the black mirrors of the lotus ponds, an aisle in a garden cathedral. The choir of frogs hushed, and the statuaries of the Buddha and Quan Yin bore silent witness to their journey toward the temple. The blanket of night above was filled with a million stars, each another world, another place that she would rather be than here in the hell that she found herself in.
They ascended the steps, and Aislen pushed open the door. She walked into the temple, holding the door open for Raziel to follow. A single candle flickered on the altar, casting dark shadows around the room. Raziel took off his shoes and shrugged off the ever-present backpack, placing them by the door, already understanding what to do. Aislen watched him as he went to the side table, picked up more candles, and took them to the altar. He lit each one from the wick of the original flame. Warmth and light bloomed in the shrine, eradicating the gloom and inviting her in.
His gaze wandered the small rotunda, taking in the relics and the artwork. One banner in particular caught his eye, and he finally let his guard down. “What’s this?”
“It’s the Baku,” she said. “The devourer of nightmares.”
“According to the Japanese?”
“I suppose.” She shrugged. “According to Troy, as far as I know.”
A shadow darkened his face. His eyes turned from blue to slate.
Aislen walked barefoot across the tatami mats and stood beside him. “I owe you an apology, Raziel,” she said, tentatively placing her hand on his shoulder.
He flinched as her energy broke through his barriers. Aislen could feel it too, the alchemy of their diametrically opposed energies intermingling, crackling with static. Aislen realized it was the first time she’d reached out to him and initiated contact. The quality of it was different, dynamic and smooth.
He looked down at her coolly. “For what?” He knew for what; he just wasn’t going to admit that she’d hurt him.
“For thinking that you would kill Mathis…back at the house. I immediately jumped to that conclusion. Even after what you had said about helping him. And after all that you have done for me…all that you have shown me the past two days…I should have known better.”
The shield slipped away from his eyes, and his face softened. He nodded, accepting her apology, then looked back at the dancing chimera on the banner. “Maybe he can devour this nightmare if we let him.”
“We could try,” Aislen sighed. “But I don’t think it would work.”
“Belief is half the challenge, so they say.”
“What? And I wake up in my bed, and it was all a bad dream?”
“Sure, why not?”
She looked up at him. “Do you believe that, Raziel?”
He contemplated the banner for a moment, then shook his head. “No. I don’t.”
“Me neither,” she whispered. She released her hand and let it slip away from his back. He caught it on the way down, holding it in his, turning to her.
“We can make this work, Aislen. We can turn this situation to our advantage.”
Aislen looked up at him, bewildered. “How, Raziel? How do we make this work? Go back in time? To a day where I never dreamed?”
Although she was being facetious, Raze actually thought about that, then shook his head, frowning. “No.”
But she did think about it. What if she time-walked? Back to the night of her dream? She could create a disruption and wake herself before she ever went into The Stratum…ever trespassed into Demesne. She could be the Baku and devour the nightmare before she ever had it.
Raze reached up and took her face in his other hand, forcing her to look at him. “Don’t even think about it.” His words were short and clipped.
“But why not?” she protested. “It would solve all our problems, wouldn’t it? I could just go back to my normal, oblivious life…hiding in the distortion of the railroad tracks…going to school…working. And my mom would be safe.”
Raze scowled. “If it didn’t happen that night, Aislen, it could have happened the next. And you wouldn’t be able to go back to the next night if you didn’t develop the skills you have today. Sigmund Lange would still be there, would still be hunting you. And Troy… he would still be there too, and you would still think he’s the hero. It could actually end up being a whole lot worse.”
“But you could have your life back, Raziel. I wouldn’t have come along to ruin it.”
His jaw tightened, and his eyes narrowed with a searing intensity. “I don’t want that life back, Aislen.” His voice was a low rumble. “We would have crossed paths eventually. And if I hadn’t met you then, it may have turned out very differently for you and your mother.” His eyes looked pained as he said the words.
“If you hadn’t been in Demesne that day…” he stopped, his voice smoky, his eyes glimmering. “Then you wouldn’t be here today.” He brushed his thumb softly across her cheek and traced it down her throat. An electric shiver coursed through her body into the core of her being, making her acutely aware.
“I wouldn’t trade that day for this.” Raze bent down, pulling her lips to meet his and kissed her. It was for real this time, long and deep, nothing to hide. The room ignited with white heat.
He gently pulled his lips from the kiss but kept his face close to hers. “Come away with me, Aislen.” His voice was a husky whisper against her mouth. “Let’s do what your mother asked. Let’s run. Together. I can keep you safe. I can take care of you.” He lifted his other hand to her face, eyes focused deeply into her own. “I love you.”
Aislen could taste the words on her tongue as she breathed them in. All the conflicted torment in him evaporated, revealing something stronger, more powerful. He captured her lips with his mouth again, this time hungry. The visceral charge between them made the room quake with energy.
He slid his hands down to her shoulders and pulled her closer. His silent demand matched her own desire, and she surrendered into his embrace. He slipped one arm around her waist, and his other hand tangled into her loose curls. He pulled her head to the side and dropped his head to her shoulder, letting his mouth taste down the curve of her neck. A current pulsed down her body, inflaming her senses. She let her head fall back, losing herself to the delicious sensation. A part of her wanted to be ashamed for how badly she wanted him, but it was a very small part now, made infinitesimal by the fact that he wanted her just as much…maybe more.
He slowly savored her throat as he moved back up to her ear. The ragged sigh of his breath against her ear sent another scorching tremor down her spine.
“Let me feel you, Aislen,” he whispered, his voice raw and husky. “Let me feel who you really are. Just this once.”
Aislen knew what he meant and let all of the energies she’d been masking herself with fall away, not only the facades she’d been hiding in the past two days but ones she’d been hiding behind her entire life. She dropped them all, exposing the barest essence of herself, inviting him in entirely. The space around them went ultraviolet.
He groaned, finding her mouth again, drinking her in. This time she kissed him back, reaching her arms around his neck and pulling herself into his arms. The cool mercury of him wrapped around her, gently caressing every part of her at once, coaxing and teasing her. Her body and soul responded: all the crooked and folded places of her being unfurled, blooming like a lotus, opening to him in every way. She felt the low vibration of him push through every last barrier as he penetrated the center of her etheric being, quicksilver into a violet sea, and all was lost to pure rapture.
∞
Lying in the da
rk holding her, Raze listened to the steady sigh of her breathing, marveling at the miracle of Aislen Walker.
She had disrupted every single part of his world, every cell and atom of his being, and he wouldn’t change it for anything. What he had refused to admit, what he’d denied for fear that it would make him weaker, had made him stronger.
All his life, he had believed that control and power were what made him strong, that by shutting people out and closing emotions down, he had created a granite shield that made him invincible.
He’d thought emotions made you weak. And he’d thought love destroyed you. But it was love that had shattered the stone and unleashed a power that he couldn’t have fathomed.
She had saved him. Raze had never believed in a God, never believed in anything but himself. But now he couldn’t believe there wasn’t something that had put them into each other’s lives. He couldn’t believe that that something or someone had found him worthy enough to have brought her to him.
Raze looked down at her naked body pressed against him, slowly taking her in, imprinting the image of perfection in his mind. Her bare, porcelain skin glittered like silver in the moonlight. Her hair fanned out behind her in fiery waves. He resisted the urge to kiss her awake and recreate the magic that had just happened. But her face was angelic, relaxed against his shoulder, peaceful for the first time since he’d laid eyes on her, so he decided to let her sleep. There would be plenty of time for that later.
He looked up through the skylights on the ceiling. Beyond the cobwebs and the cloudy, rain-stained glass, the night was clear and filled with stars. They held such promise, a thousand possible futures. If they could get around the obstacles, there could be a future that belonged to them. With her beside him, he knew that they could find one.
He pulled her closer and let the rhythm of her heartbeat lull him to sleep.
HYMN TO RESONANCE
Madness ~ Muse
Thirty-Eight
Aislen drifted through the night sky, unburdened and free. She’d never felt so light, happy, or fulfilled in her life. The connection she had just experienced with Raziel had transported her into bliss, a rightness that she couldn’t find the words for. As she floated in the languid blanket of black velvet, she admired the stars, noticed how they were aligned. Each constellation told a story of how this was meant to be all along.
The stars began to spin, slowly at first like a ticking clock, keeping time like the constellations do. Only they were moving backward. The momentum gained speed, and soon a vortex of black and white swirled counterclockwise before her. She began soaring faster, warp speed through the tunnel the vortex had created. It quickly spat her out into another night sky, still and calm like the one she had just been in, except now she was hovering above her house.
She had Traveled like this before, with her father, and something about the quality of the air made her feel he was around. She directed herself down to her mother’s window like she had with her dad and pushed herself through the open crack of the pane.
Her mother was there, sleeping peacefully in her bed, and Aislen’s heart burst with love. God, she had missed her! She wanted to run to her, wake her and wrap her arms around her. She wanted to tell her how much she loved her but resisted the urge. She was in a Viewing, not really there. It would freak her mother out if she were woken by a ghost.
She looked around the room, feeling again like her father was around, but the room was empty. She decided to go to her bedroom and see if he was waiting there. She slipped through the open crack of the door. Her bedroom was empty except for her own form sleeping on the bed.
It was surreal seeing herself lying in her own bed sleeping so peacefully. She looked so different, so young, so untouched by worry or fear. It seemed so long ago that she was this person.
Aislen looked at the clock on the nightstand: 3:00.
The distinct memory of waking up at 3:33 in the morning came back to her.
It was that night. And her sleeping self was about to have a dream.
Aislen remembered reading somewhere that dreams didn’t last long: mere seconds to forty-five minutes. She looked at her face resting on the pillow, the half-smile on her lips. She wasn’t there yet.
Aislen’s heart stopped. She could change everything, right here, right now. She could make a noise, knock over the clock or slam the door. But she thought of Raziel. He was going to be in that dream. If she woke herself up, she would never meet him. At least not in a way that could lead to where they were now.
Aislen couldn’t allow that to happen. She couldn’t bear the idea of not having him in her life. But it wasn’t happenstance that found her in this room. There must be something she could do.
She heard the breath catch from her sleeping form and saw her eyes begin to move under the lids. There wasn’t much time; she was going into the dream.
Aislen decided to go in with herself. Doing what she had done with Thomas, she slipped inside her own head and followed the dream into The Stratum.
Aislen recognized it immediately: the empty desert, the desolate sky, the lack of horizon. Except this time, Aislen saw her dream-self there, turning in a circle, surveying the landscape, confused. Aislen hadn’t realized it at the time, but she’d come into the dream barefoot and in her nightgown. She was definitely out of place, vulnerable in the forbidding landscape.
Her dream-self didn’t see Aislen as her frightened eyes skimmed past her. Aislen thought of saying something to herself, something to reassure her, but the timing didn’t feel right.
On cue, the ground began to tremble, and the sky morphed. The atmosphere became visible with particles and atoms, dancing and rearranging themselves, evolving into something different. Even though Aislen knew what was happening, it was as terrifying now as it had been then. Maybe it was because she also knew what was coming.
The buildings began birthing themselves into reality. It seemed much more controlled to Aislen now than it had in the dream, and almost instantly they were standing in the city of Demesne.
This was Raziel’s space. She could feel him in everything about it. It exuded and pulsed with creative energy, the energy she clearly recognized as the person he had been then. But strangely, she could also feel the energy of who he was now within the grid. A thin, underlying current patiently waiting to be tapped.
Her dream-self started walking down the street, leaving visible footprints in the ash. Aislen followed her and watched as she spotted herself in the broken glass. She walked toward it, looking at her reflection, trying to figure out who she was.
“Aislen,” she heard herself whisper. “My name is Aislen Walker.”
The vibration of her voice sent a ripple into the ethers. Aislen watched as the disruption was absorbed into the grid, witnessing how she had changed the course of events just by being here. This was supposed to happen. She was meant to be here then.
Another glitch appeared in the grid, one Aislen hadn’t noticed in the dream. A rupture cut through the hologram, and her father walked through.
Aislen gasped, shocked. Preston looked up and saw her standing but a few feet away. The ghost of a smile hovered at the corner of his mouth. She was supposed to be here, too.
She watched, confused now, as her dream-self looked into the glass at the indent of her chin.
Preston leaned down and whispered in her ear. “I love your little butt-chin, Buttercup.”
Both Aislens’ hearts stuttered; dream-Aislen’s because it was unlocking forgotten memories, and current Aislen’s because she realized her father was doing it on purpose.
Aislen watched as her father pulled away from her dream-self and looked back up at her.
Read the letter, Aislen, he telepathed before he merged back into the grid, sealing the portal from which he came.
Aislen tried to catch her breath as she watched her dream-self try to do the same. She knew now that they both were supposed to be here. But what was she supposed to do now? Was she supposed to leave and jus
t go read his letter?
Both Aislens heard the footsteps at the same time. Dream-Aislen sprang into action and hid herself behind a car. Aislen froze. Should she hide? Would Raziel see her? Would he feel her presence here? She wanted to hide, too, but couldn’t move. Before she could even see him, she could feel the resonance, the undeniable magnetic pull of him. She could feel how her whole world had already shifted, and they were locked in an orbit that could not be undone.
She watched the foursome marching in formation down the street, Raziel with Blake and the two holographic drones.
Raziel raised his fist, and the whole group halted. They all dropped into a defensive search and destroy posture, and Raziel scanned the area. He had felt her dream-self there before he ever saw her footprints.
He flipped up his visor, and Aislen’s heart caught again in her chest. She was always meant to be here. If he’d never found her here, he wouldn’t have become the man he was today, the man she was in love with.
The incredible depth of her feelings for him was a revelation, and she loved him even now, even as he was about to do a terrible and evil thing. Aislen was helpless. All the horrifying events that were going to happen now and in the next few days were meant to happen…so she could change him…and he could change her.
As Raziel started following her footprints toward the car, Aislen noticed another glitch in the grid at the end of the street, and Scott Parrish showed up in what he thought was only a dangerous game. He just didn’t know how dangerous a game it was.
Now was her chance, Aislen thought. She could jump out of the dream and wake herself up. Maybe enough had happened that Raze would still find her.
But again, she stopped herself. If she left now, Blake would still kill his father…and if her dream-self weren’t there, Blake would be successful at killing himself. She couldn’t leave! It would be a selfish thing to do. There had to be something else she could do.
Time Walker: Episode 2 of The Walker Saga Page 26