Laila grips my hand on her face. “Ben, I …”
I shake my head. “Don’t pull away from me, Laila. Let yourself go for once.” She grips my shirt and pulls me down onto the sand with her. I kiss up her neck, feeling over her body and pulling her into me. Her hands are inside my shirt when her tongue trails up my neck and back to my lips. I grip her ass and tuck her body against mine. She lets out a sharp breath and a moan. I want her.
“Fuck me, Ben,” she says, rubbing me harder than I already am.
I spin her onto her back, pinning her hands over her head, ready to tear through her shirt. Looking into her eyes, I realize the moment we are in. “I’m going to take you home, Laila.” I help her up, lifting her chin to kiss her one more time. She holds her eyes closed, looking up at me only when I begin to let go of her body. Laila’s legs give, and I have to take her back into my arms to hold her up. “Whoa, are you okay?” She nods and leans against my chest. “I got you.” I pick her up and carry her to the car, enjoying her vulnerability. “I think you drank a little too much, Tiger.”
“Oh Ben, I only had four.”
“Four? Where was I?”
“Ohhh, you weren’t looking, I made sure of it. The guy at the table next to us is probably really mad and sober right now.” She says honestly, making me laugh for once. I get her back to her hotel room and put her safely in bed.
Laila grabs hold of me. “Where are you going, Ben? Stay with me.”
“I think that’s a bad idea, Laila. You, me, in a hotel room—I don’t want you this way. I want you, but not like this.” She is clearly confused, and I’m not sure I understand either. I kiss her gently on the lips, hovering for a second as her lips tremble against mine. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For a perfect day,” I say, stepping backwards out her door.
CHAPTER 15
Laila
I watched him walk to his car. He knew, but I couldn’t help myself. I opened my balcony door and crawled into bed, dreaming about him. I dreamed about his smile, the way he looked at me, and the way he held me, kissed me. I wonder what it would be like to be his, for him to be mine. I’ve never met anyone like him, so sure of himself and respectful at the same time. I am doing my best to not get wrapped up in him, but I am failing terribly. I don’t know why I kissed him. Maybe I was just hoping it wouldn’t feel as good as it did. I think my craving for him is getting in the way of my judgement. I need to fix that somehow. I should know better. Ben is just the bad boy that makes my knees weak. He’s not the man that will make my life complete. He can’t be. After all, if he found out why I was really here, he’d never forgive me.
My morning is met with a schedule that requires me to follow Titus around for an entire day with Nathan, Luca, and Ben. Thankfully, with Nathan around, the other two don’t want to bring up any foolishness, but Luca is anxious to know everything. He can’t stop smiling. While I try to ignore him, Ben simply shakes his head and laughs.
Our first stop is among the city’s political figures. Not surprising. They laugh it up as they discuss business in their secret code so none of us have any information we shouldn’t. It’s not difficult to figure out what they’re discussing. I could have them all arrested right now, but I must remain focused on the bigger picture. The only bit of information that seems helpful is when someone mentions. “The problem.”
“The problem is beyond reach. Isn’t that right, Nathan?” Titus asks.
“It is Sir, without a doubt,” Nathan crows.
“Nathan has found a new hobby as of late. It keeps him occupied in his spare time and quite happy. He’s one of my best advisors. I always like to keep my people happy, especially my best.”
“And the new one? Is she happy?” I overhear one whisper to Titus.
Titus looks my way as if he wants to verify I didn’t hear them. “So far, she’s interesting, but I will let you know if that changes. Be careful though, Theodore, her foster father is the chief of police.”
“And you bring her here?”
“I hire the best, and her background is remarkable.” Titus fails to reassure him, and the man pulls a knife that I stop from coming anywhere near Titus. Theo’s man comes after me only to be taken down by Ben while Luca and Nathan stop everyone else from moving an inch. Guns appear from every direction. Titus doesn’t break a sweat and continues to eat like nothing happened. “I told you. I hire the best.”
“Yes, I see that.” The man sits down, breathing heavily.
Titus is so proud of his assessment of me and the rest of his team that he gives us each a stack before we hand over the reins to the next team. I’m not sure what to do with mine. Luca made a suggestion to put a down payment on a horse so I won’t have to walk everywhere. A ridiculous suggestion, but it makes me laugh. It has become normal to hug Luca before I leave him. This time, Ben watches me.
“Do I get one too?” he asks.
I don’t deny him. He would expect that, and I want to catch him off guard for once. I lean in close and kiss his cheek. “Better?”
I start to back away, but he holds me to him, pulling me around the corner and away from watchful eyes. Before I can protest, he moves my chin up and presses his sweet lips to mine with a gentle caress. “Now I’m better.” He walks away cocky as ever. Luca follows behind him with a teasing expression in my direction. Nothing like little brothers having fun at your expense.
I really shouldn’t be this happy, but I can barely keep my feet on the ground as I walk back to the hotel. A full day of banter with Luca and Ben and a kiss to top it all. I decide it’s too good of a day to conclude, so I walk the long way by my favorite place, the place I once called home. The big backyard was perfect for the dog I always wanted, just like the one that plays in it now. I stop by the corner store to buy treats. It gives me a reason to stay a little while and enjoy the feeling of belonging again. The old lady that lives there now never seems to mind. She simply waves whenever she sees me and lets her big, goofy pup out. I don’t know his name, not that it matters. He’s just the figment of a dream that never even had a chance.
In the early morning, I take advantage of Titus’s full gym before I have to begin work, only someone beat me to it. Ben is in a zone, practicing something, but when he catches sight of me in the mirror, he pulls out his earbuds and waves me in.
“Good morning.”
“Good morning,” I reply, accepting his arms around me and his kiss to my lips without thinking. Once he started, he never stopped, but I haven’t tried to stop him either. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
“Don’t leave. It’s big enough for both of us. In fact, do you want to do some forms together?” He tilts his head, taking my hand and encouraging me to work with him. I can’t resist, not that I try hard. He’s just too tempting to walk away from. I watch him and follow his moves, enjoying the slow motion of his body and his muscles flexing. My tension eases, and my mind wanders. “Focus, Tiger. I’m losing you.” I refocus, and we move in sync with each other, every move matched by the other one. It’s wonderful to watch, even more so to be a part of. When we finish, his smile is larger than mine. “That was fun. I love to watch you move,” he says as I think the same about him.
“Okay, now you follow me for once.” I turn my back to him, getting into position, and he walks up behind me, standing so close I can feel his every movement. “Ben,” I laugh as his hands wander and his lips tease down my neck. I reach back to cradle his head on me and notice, in the mirror, someone standing at the door watching us. I snap my head around to verify, and the person walks away.
“What’s wrong?”
“I thought I saw someone watching us.”
“Well, if they were, they’re gone now. It was probably one of the guys coming in to work out and didn’t want to interrupt us,” he says, trying to reassure me, but the long blond hair tells me otherwise. Ben quickly changes my focus back to him, teasing me with his nomadic hands and lips. “Have dinner with me ton
ight.”
“Where?”
“My place. I’m going to cook for you.” Ben leans in, kissing me. “I’m a really good cook.” His devilish grin makes me question. “No, I really am. Come over. I’ll keep my hands to myself, and we can go on the roof and stare at the stars and recite poetry to each other.”
“Poetry? Tell me you don’t write poetry too?”
“Sure.” He holds me off, stepping back to study me. “It’s going to be good. Are you ready?”
“I don’t know,” I laugh as he positions himself as some kind of philosophical beatnik.
“Roses are red …” I laugh, shaking my head. “Listen, I got this. “Roses are red. Violets are blue. Daisy is a drag, and I want to screw …”
“Ben!” I snap before he can finish.
“What? I thought that was pretty good. Come over tonight, Laila. Even though my poetry skills aren’t the best, my cooking skills are.” He lures me in with his eyes and subtle touches.
“What time?”
“I’ll pick you up after work.”
“Oh. I am sorry. Did I interrupt something?” Kian slams through the door. “Going out together tonight? Wow, how much longer are you two going to fuck before someone else can get a chance at her, Ben?”
“Ignore him,” I say to Ben’s instantly tense posture. Kian laughs, passing by us and sweeping his hand out to grab my ass, but his attempt is halted. Kian cries out in pain as Ben holds his hand in an awkward position. “Ben?” I stare at him until he smiles and lets Kian go.
“Asshole. I don’t have to take this shit,” Kian mumbles, walking out.
Ben watches him leave until he is out of sight. “You finish your workout, and I will see you tonight.” Another kiss and he lets go, only to come back for another. He seems to have a hard time letting me go today, but I am not complaining.
“Go. You’re making me nervous now.” He walks out and leaves me to work out all the sexual tension he just built up.
Sweaty and tired, I take advantage of the showers being empty, putting a sign on the door for the guys to not come in. I get completely immersed when I hear a noise outside. The door opens. “Someone’s in here.” Jolie walks right in and stares at me as she takes my towel and throws it across the room.
“If you want it, you will have to get it yourself. Go ahead. I want to see what you have that gets him so excited.” Jolie crosses her arms, waiting for me to respond, to move, to give her the show she came for. “I don’t have a job, so I can stand here all day. You, however, are supposed to be clocking in soon, aren’t you?”
“What do you want, Jolie?”
“I told you. I want to see what you got. I want to see it all. I want to see for myself that you’re not good enough. Nathan gets pretty upset when people are late, so I would move if I were you.” She waits happily, moving to the shower to see over the wall. I still have soap on my body and shampoo in my hair. “Oh, you’re not finished. Go ahead, clean yourself up. I would hate for Ben to kiss a dirty woman.” I turn the shower back on and quickly rinse off. I wipe the water from my eyes, noticing her phone pointed in my direction.
“What are you doing?” I ask, turning my body.
“Trying to get you more business. Once I post this, you should have plenty of men to fuck your ass, and then you can leave mine alone. It’s all about marketing. Now, go get your towel before I call Titus and tell him you’re being disobedient.” Kill her and run for my life or endure her torment and continue with my mission? It’s a difficult call in this moment, but I never give up without a fight, and I refuse to let her destroy everything. I have no choice but to do as she asks. “Oh, there you go. I like it. That’s good. Try to keep your nipples pumped, it makes for a better video.” My heart races, and I fear it may burst from my chest. The short walk seems like miles with her eyes on me, judging my every move. I haven’t felt this way —helpless—in a long time. I can’t fight back, and she knows it. “Oh, you didn’t bend over. Did you not get a waxing done?” She grabs at my towel, causing me to slip and fall to the ground. “There we go. Ass shot! Yeah, you might want to take care of that. Ben likes it smooth. Do you want to spread your legs for the camera? We already know you know how. Let me get someone who can help you. Kian, you can come in now. Kian is my guard for the day. Isn’t that convenient? We both hate you, but he was curious.” Kian scans my body with a greedy gaze, smiling all over himself. “If you want to fuck him, you can. I won’t tell.”
“I’m game.” Kian struts near me. “Condom or no condom? Your choice.”
I snatch my towel back and wrap it tightly around me. Grabbing my clothes, I escape to go to a single bathroom on another floor, running into Luca on the way out. “Hey, Nathan’s looking for you. What happened? Are you okay?” he asks, noticing my shaking hands.
“Let me go, Luca.” I leave him faster than I ran into him, rushing to lock myself in the bathroom. Before I get dressed for work, I take a minute to catch my breath. No tears. No tears, Laila. It doesn’t matter. They don’t matter. I concentrate on breathing, staring at myself in the mirror, my hands planted on the vanity. It takes longer than I would have liked, but I get it together and walk out to put my things in the team room and gear up for the day. The moment I walk in the door, everyone goes silent. Kian stares, a slight grin curling the corners of his mouth.
I consider leaving. I consider beating him in front of everyone. Before I can even consider my options, Ben comes crashing through the door, throwing Kian across the room. “You son of a bitch. I will end you.”
“What the fuck is your problem?” Kian yells before Ben begins beating the hell out of him.
“Ben! Ben!” Luca yells, trying to calm him down and pull him off of Kian who has blood pouring from his face. Still steaming, Ben drops Kian to the floor. Everyone tries to keep their distance, knowing only Luca can get away with touching him right now. “I got the phone. Nothing uploaded yet. Thank goodness for a secure house with zero cell reception.” Luca hands Jolie’s phone to Ben. Stomping her way into the room, Jolie tries to take her phone back, but she is stopped by a gun to her head. “It’s not yours anymore.” She steps back, and Ben throws it to the floor, firing with his gun and shattering it into a thousand pieces. Everyone scrambles, including Kian until Ben turns the gun to him.
“Ben!” I yell, and he holsters his gun. Luca picks up the phone pieces and throws them in the garbage disposal while Ben walks up to me. “I’m fine. You didn’t have to do that,” I say, a little shakier than I would have liked. He pulls me into the weapons closet and shuts the door. “I’m fine. I really am. You didn’t have to do all that.”
“Yes I did. Otherwise, it would happen again,” he says, touching me. I flinch. My eyes never meet his as he patiently tries to hold me. “I’m sorry. I should have stayed with you.”
“She’s determined, Ben. She’s crazy. Who knows what she might do next.”
“Don’t worry about her. She’s being handled,” he says confidently. “I’m going to fill in for you today, so you don’t have to stay.”
“Ben, I’m fine. I don’t want to go and act like it bothered me. I don’t want anyone to think it bothered me.” He considers what I’m saying and seems to understand.
“Okay. If Nathan gives you a hard time or you feel overwhelmed—anything–tell me.” I take a deep breath and reach for the door. “Laila.” I pause as he leans around me to hold the door closed. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.”
“I think this is a bad idea, Ben. It’s already causing more trouble than I want to deal with. I just want to come to work and do my job. I don’t want to have to watch my back here. I may not know much about what goes on, but I know enough. It’s a thin line we walk to keep our jobs and our lives. She’s just waiting for my mistake, to cheer on my execution.”
“Jolie is handled. You don’t have to worry about her.”
“She’s the boss’s wife. And Kian, Nathan’s protégé? Nathan will do everything he can to protect him. Kian still be
ing here after what he did with Caberera is evidence enough. Between the two of them, I’m screwed. Maybe if I back away from you, Jolie will lay off and I won’t have to worry so much about who’s coming after me next.”
“I wish you could trust me, Laila. Trust that I can protect you.”
“I don’t know you, Ben.” I walk out the door as they are carrying Kian out.
Nathan looks up at me, fuming. “You are coming with me.”
“She didn’t do anything wrong, Nathan.”
“Ben, I swear, I have had enough of your bullshit. Now stay out of this.” Nathan takes me by the arm and forces me into Titus’s office with Ben following close behind. Jolie is already crying to Titus and pleading for my death. The moment she sees me, she cries with even more dramatic hysteria.
“What the fuck is going on around here?!” Titus yells, throwing items from his desk at us until we all pay attention to him. “All of you get in here.”
Nathan stops me. “Not you. Sit.”
The screaming and yelling make me think to issue the alert I was given to pull me early. It’s an agonizing wait. Second guessing myself and wondering how I let it get to this point. I don’t know how to fix it or how to handle what’s coming.
The door slams open, and Ben steps out, staring at the ground before looking my way. “He wants to talk to you.” Ben grasps my hand quickly and lets go, trying to reassure me.
I walk in, noticing Titus relaxing in his chair. I’m good? Somehow I’m good? Titus smiles, waving me in and providing me a seat in front of him. “I will say, you do provide plenty of excitement around here for, otherwise, boring days.”
Undercover: Secrets & Lies Page 13