by Allison, J
I nodded once to show that I heard. Nan looked sick with worry.
Claire kept on, still annoyingly cheery, “I’ll just need to check you for concussion if you don’t mind.”
“I’m not concussed.” I countered, a little too abruptly, Nan frowned at my tone.
“Well if it’s all the same to you,” Claire shrugged, undeterred, as she sat on the bed next to me.
What followed was a mix of the usual head trauma questions, I’d heard these on TV often enough.
‘What’s your name?’
‘How old are you?’
‘What is your address?’ something I didn’t actually know since arriving at the ranch.
‘How many fingers am I holding up?’
‘Follow my finger with your eyes.’
Apparently I passed with flying colors which seemed to keep Claire and Nan happy. As she climbed off my bed a sudden thought hit me.
“Who carried me in here?” I doubted it was Grandpop, he may be able to lift forty pound sacks onto the pickup but I was far heavier than forty pounds, especially as a dead weight, and Pop wasn’t a young man anymore.
“What was that Hun?” Claire asked, stuffing her instruments back into her bag.
“Who carried me in here? How did I end up on my bed?”
“Oh that was Robert, actually he caught you before you could land in the glass and cut yourself up even worse.”
“Oh.” I thought I had imagined someone catching me.
“Yeah he moved pretty darn quickly.” Claire added.
I’ll bet, I thought wryly.
“Where is he now?” I ventured, trying to keep my tone even, why did it always sound like I was chasing this guy.
“He took off dear,” Nan smiled, “Said he had to check on something with one of the horses and left as soon as he’d put you down, he was the one who bought Claire to check on you, he was a little worried about your ribs.” Nans sentence ended on a delighted grin, obviously she had designs for me to date Robert.
Well we would see about that.
Claire was pulling a jacket on over her polo.
“I’ll be heading off y’all,” she announced, her southern accent flavoring her words.
“Take a couple of pain killers Ava and then get a good nights sleep, wrap your ribs nice and tight tomorrow and if you have any worries just give me a call.”
“Thanks.” I murmured, finally managing to display some of the manners Nan had expected earlier.
Claire answered with a smile before she and Nan breezed from my room already busy with town gossip, closing the door behind them.
I leant over and opened my bedside drawer, quickly taking two of the Tylenol I kept in there in case of headaches, tonight’s rated up there with one of the worst.
Flicking off the light, I submerged my room in darkness before crawling under the covers, clothes still on, and closing my eyes. I had no trouble falling asleep tonight, the last image in my head was Robert, leading me home.
8.
When I woke the sun was streaming though my window, I looked over at my bedside clock.
Ten thirty!
Wow, I hadn’t slept that late in ages, I’d wasted half the day already.
My head still throbbed so I took another two Tylenol and wandered towards my bathroom, my ribs throbbing, I guess I would have to get used to that for the next few days.
Rushing through the shower this time, I was eager to get out and see if Robert was nearby, I wasn’t going to let him get away today.
Strapping my ribs as Claire had told me, nice and tight, I inspected myself in the mirror. My hair was back to normal, falling in light waves down past my shoulders, my bangs managed to cover most of the egg on my head, although my face still looked a little un-symmetrical on the left hand side.
The day was hot already so I threw on a singlet and shorts and headed for the kitchen, grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl on my way through.
Bursting out the back door I strode into the sunlight, full of the intention to find Robert and question him relentlessly, until I got the answers I wanted.
This turned out to be far easier said than done. It was as if I had descended into a ghost town, both of my grandparents seemed to have disappeared on mysterious errands of their own and I couldn’t see any of the other workers in my sweeping searches of the sheds and stables. All that I needed to complete this scenario was the token tumble weed blowing past.
I wandered towards Beauts pen, just being within the same vicinity as him made me nervous, but something drew me to him. Maybe I needed to face my fears after yesterdays ride or maybe it was just morbid curiosity, was he still just a horse or had he sprouted another head and started breathing fire?
Taking Beaut yesterday hadn’t been one of my brightest ideas, actually it probably rated up there with one of the most stupid, and now I was even more terrified then ever at the thought of riding. If I never got on another horse again it would definitely be too soon.
Whatever instinct drew me in that direction turned out to be the right one.
Robert was in the pen along with Beaut and four other horses, all of the them milling around him, nuzzling at his back as he swept his hands down the length of Beauts long black legs, so focused on what he was doing that he didn’t seem to notice my arrival, until he spoke.
“Well your uphill gallop doesn’t seem to have damaged his legs.” He said without looking up, I wondered briefly how he knew I was behind him.
“That’s one positive I guess, shame I didn’t come off so well.” I was still all too aware of my aching ribs.
“Well if you did what you were told you wouldn’t be broken and bruised now would you,” he snapped, turning to face me, his eyes tight, burning into mine. I couldn’t look away.
“What do you mean?” I bristled,
“You were told not to go up there Ava, I heard that with my own ears, you could have been killed!”
“Oh I don’t think…”
“No obviously you don’t,” he interrupted, snatching Beauts halter rope from the ground,
“If you had you would have realised that you are definitely no horse woman and not risked you neck riding out on your own up a washed out track and then I…” he clamped his mouth shut, as though he had said to much. His dark eyes flashed over me quickly, giving me the uncanny feeling that he had been able to take in all my bruises with that split second glance, he turned quickly pushing past me and disappearing back towards the stables.
“Hey wait on.” I called to his rapidly departing figure. He didn’t. He kept going, not bothering to look back.
I was gob smacked, yesterday he had been gentle and smiling and today he was back to his antagonistic, self-righteous self.
I became slowly aware that my fists were clenched, my fingernails digging painful half-moons into my palms, I uncurled them one by one, taking a deep shaky breath.
Robert was acting like he had a split personality disorder. Maybe he wasn’t different, maybe he was damn well schizophrenic!
It took me a few more moments to remember I was in a pen with four very large very nosey horses, I stiffened feeling a rock drop into the bottom of my stomach and the hairs on my arms stand on end as one large black nose nudged my arm. Very slowly, without looking away from the gate, which was now my immediate goal, I walked towards the edge of the pen. Climbing quickly between the two wooden rails I only let my breath out when I was safely on the other side. Forgetting in my panic that nothing bad had actually happened, there was no reason to fear the horses, especially when I wasn’t on the back of one.
I looked around once more to see if Robert was visible, he wasn’t anywhere in sight and I felt a pang of disappointment. My ribs were pounding and my head was beginning to ache again, I decided to head back towards the house.
Perhaps a few more painkillers and a dip in the river was exactly what was needed. After all, I knew where he lived.
“Wow!” Sally smiled as I pulled off my shirt, standi
ng in my bikini she had a full view of the rather artistic smearing of purple and blue bruises I now sported over most of my rib cage.
“You weren’t wrong, that looks … well… really painful.”
I shrugged, “Let’s just say I won’t be entering any rodeos soon.”
“Sooo,” She continued, “What did your Grandpop say about the fact that you had gone up the hill, was he mad?”
“I’m not allowed to go to the Ranchers Ball.” I could tell her this quite easily and with no regret, I hadn’t wanted to go anyway.
“What!” her reaction made me jump.
“That’s not fair, surely he could ground you from doing something else.” I was starting to suspect that the Ranchers Ball was the social calendar event of the summer here, similar to Prom, sans Teachers, making it even more appealing to attend.
“Not much I can do about it now.” I answered, trying my best to sound disappointed, although I couldn’t really have cared less, I was beginning to regret my choice of conversation.
“So has Robert asked you to go yet?” I moved towards the water, directing the question over my shoulder. The river was a little too cool when I dipped my toes in, although it would feel amazing on my bruises so I started to wade out, trying not to gasp as the cold water rushed around legs, all the fine hairs on my body standing on end as I rippled with goose bumps. I turned when I was up to my waist, surprised Sally hadn’t answered me yet, Robert after all was her favorite subject. She was staring at me, a strange bewildered expression on her face, her mouth hanging open so wide I thought her chin would land on her knees at any moment.
I had to laugh, not that I wanted to, it sent painful shock waves through my ribs.
“What?” I asked, still chuckling.
Sally glanced up, meeting my gaze briefly, before dropping her eyes down towards the rocky shore, a deep line forming between her golden brows.
“Sally, What?” She was looking at me really weird now and I was starting to feel a little anxious.
“Your back…” her voice was stiff,
“Oh,” I laughed again, “Did I bruise there too? Beaut, or should I say Brute,” I smiled at my own joke, had I really only just thought to call him that,
“He managed to dump me in most rocky spot he could, don’t worry I’m thinking of asking Grandpop if he will consider making him into dog sausage.”
Even now Sally didn’t smile, her expression was starting to frighten me.
“Look you’re really going to have to tell me what’s going on, your starting to freak me out.” I demanded, angry that I could hear fear in my voice. What was wrong with me now?
“You have a bruise on your back, it’s in the shape of a… well… it’s in the shape of a hand.” She finished in a whisper.
“What?” I really laughed now, it made me ache all over, “Sal it probably just looks like a hand I have a lot of bruises.”
“No,” she almost whispered, “It’s a hand, palm, fingers, thumb, even the start of a wrist,” She looked terrified, I could see she was struggling with her next question, her knuckles were turning white where she gripped her knees.
“Did your Grandpop hit you Ava?”
“NO.” I answered quickly, the fact that she would even consider it made me feel sick to my stomach, Grandpop wouldn’t hurt a fly, as cliché as that was, he was one of the most humane people I had ever met.
“No,” I repeated again a little more calmly, “Grandpop can yell, but he would never hit me Sal,” I smiled, trying to make light of it.
“Honestly it’s just a really strange freak of nature that the bruising took that shape.” I ducked beneath the water so that it lapped around my shoulders, I didn’t want to turn and let her analyze my back again. I was dying to get home and look in the mirror, even though I had told her she was imagining it I believed her, how could I not, after seeing Roberts strength yesterday and then, I had been in his arms more than once over the last twenty four hours.
“Now,” I spoke calmly, trying to sound casual again, I dragged my fingers slowly through the water in front of me, watching as it rippled away from my hand.
“Has Robert asked you to Ranchers Ball or not?” The question seemed to finally get through and a new misery lit her eyes.
“No.” She whined, “I really thought he might have, I saw him in town the other day, I was there with my brother and I was so flirty, you know.” she shrugged.
I loved how easily Sally could be distracted, her life was so focused on her mission for a Ball date and for that I was truly thankful right now, I nodded enthusiastically trying to encourage her to keep talking, even though my mind was occupied with my supposed bruise.
“Anyway I asked if he would be going to the Ranchers Ball, and he said that he’s not sure, do you think I should ask him?” It was painfully obvious she wanted me to say yes.
“I don’t see why not…” I agreed giving her what she wanted, the small rock from earlier slid suddenly back into place in the pit of my stomach as I said the words.
“Hmm,” She looked thoughtful. “I just might you know.”
She stood up, tying her hair back and pulling her gypsy dress over her head before coming into the water. She really was beautiful; it was almost criminal that Robert hadn’t paid more attention to her. Every other guy in town would love to ask Sally Willis to the Ranchers Ball, or so I could gather, but they all seemed to think that she was too beautiful which made them all refrain, terrified of rejection.
After a few more minutes, when my toes and fingers had gone numb from the chill of the water, I got out, dressing quickly in an attempt to keep talk away from the suspicious looking bruise that I was yet to see.
The rest of the afternoon passed easily, Sally and I lay in the sun, working on our tans and gossiping for hours, I had a lot to catch up on in regards to the politics of Huntington High before I started there. I picked my watch out of my backpack and decided it was time to head home, I could help Nan with dinner.
We jumped in Sally’s trashy old Mini Cooper and headed back up the track to the house.
“Have a great night.” I called jumping from the car and heading towards the house. This afternoon was just what I had needed, I felt so much better than I had this morning, the cool water had really soothed my aches and I was happy, the girly gossip session seemed to be the distraction I needed. I had an extra spring in my step as I pranced up the porch stairs, I heard Sally’s vehicle slow in its departure and turned to look over my shoulder, Robert was walking out of the stable, Sally had pulled up next to him her window wound down, I could see her talking, animatedly waving her hands, but they were too far away for me to hear. Jealousy instantly reared its ugly head and I was surprised at the intensity of my feelings, it made no sense, I frowned in their direction, my mind in knots to match my stomach.
“Damn it.” I mumbled, I was too late, Sally was going to ask Robert to the ball. As I spoke Roberts head swung instantly in my direction, I had the unnerving feeling he had heard me. I felt his eyes on me for just a moment, breaking his gaze I turned quickly, striding into the house.
How pathetic was I? I had no command over him, he didn’t owe me anything, yet I didn’t know why I was so upset at the thought of Sally asking him to the ball, how stupid was I? I should never have encouraged her to ask him. Dumping my bag on the kitchen table my ribs screamed in protest as I sat heavily.
Nan was already standing over the stove top, she turned at my abrupt entrance, raising a questioning eyebrow upon seeing my bad mood. Forcing a smile, and standing once more, I wandered over to look at what she was cooking.
“Spag Bowl?” I asked, more than a little hopeful.
“You guessed it in one dear,” she grinned, “Your dad told me once that it’s your favorite.”
“Oh?” My mood sunk even further at the mention of my father.
“Yes…” Nan looked upset upon seeing my reaction, but rallied quickly.
“Anyway…” she smiled, completely undeterre
d by my instant drop in mood, “Your Grandpop and I have to sweeten you up, we’re heading down to the James’s ranch after dinner, they’ve just returned from a holiday in Europe and they want to show us their photos, so you’ll be here by yourself for a while.”
“Are you sure I can look after this whole place?” I was a little scared at the prospect of being alone, I hadn’t been in a house alone at night since my last evening in Chicago, and to tell the truth I had become used to the homely sounds of my Grandparents banging around when I went to bed.
“Don’t look so terrified dear,” Nan joked, “We’ll only be thirty minutes down the road, we’ll be back around midnight and the workers huts are only a couple of miles away, you’ve seen them, if you need anything you can give Robert a call.” she gave me a sneaky smile, I ignored it.
“Well,” I announced getting over my initial shock of being abandoned,
“It’s not like anything exciting ever happens here at night anyway right? I guess I’ll just watch TV and head to bed.”
“Exactly dear, there’s nothing to do on a ranch at night you should know that by now, now go and wash up, dinners in ten minutes.”
Dinner itself was pretty uneventful, the spag bowl was delicious, Nan was even better at making it then Dad had been and I had gone back for seconds. Eating something so familiar gave me a pang of home sickness, I tried to push that aside. Nan and Grandpop were talking the entire meal about their pending photo viewing session at the James’s, and before I knew it they were gone.
After waving them off and closing the door I stood for a moment in the hallway gazing back towards the kitchen, the house seemed enormous now that I was alone in it. I shut all the doorways leading off the hall as I headed towards the kitchen, keeping my eyes averted, not wanting to see the smiling pictures that taunted me from the many frames along the wall. I wandered to the fridge, not hungry, but looking for something to keep my mind occupied. I pulled out a carrot and chewed on that as I headed towards the lounge, Sunday night, surely there was some sort of chick flick on TV. As I walked into the lounge my reflection showed in the screen of the ancient television set. I froze, turned on my heel and ran back down the hall carefully pulling my shirt off as I went, how could I have forgotten to look in the mirror when I got home. I was running blindly for a few seconds as I pulled my singlet over my head, finally it came off and my line of sight cleared again.