“Hey, beautiful…Your Majesty,” I called to Monet and then Lily.
“King Clay. Finally! I’ve been waitin’ all day for you.”
“Really? Why’s that?” I asked, setting my bags on the counter next to the ones Atlas had put down.
“I have a ’prize for you.”
“A prize? What did I win?” I removed several cans of tomato sauce and spices, set them to the side, and continued to unload while Atlas put everything else away.
Lily pursed her lips. “You didn’t win somefing. I made you a ’prize.”
“Oh, you have a sur-prise for me.”
Her nose crinkled as I expected it would. “’S’wat I said. A ’prize!” She shook her head. “I gotta get it.” And then she was off, a blur of purple and blue fabric racing down the hallway.
I shook my head. “That girl is a ball of fun.”
Monet came over and leaned into me, pressing her good side against mine. I curled my hand around the back of her neck and into her hair. Soft as fucking silk. I couldn’t wait to hold on to the satiny strands while I fucked her. My mouth watered at the thought of taking her.
Visions of my hands cupping Monet’s head as I pounded into her from above, relentless in my pursuit of her pleasure, flashed across my mind. She’d tip her head back and offer her neck, which I’d take like a greedy beast.
Monet nuzzled against the side of my chest and inhaled long and slow, knocking me from the mini-daydream. I’d been having those kind of thoughts more and more every day I saw her but couldn’t have her.
“You smell so good,” she whispered.
Monet openly showing affection without me leading the charge. Hallelujah. I wanted to jump for joy and fist pump the air. Instead, I played it cool and ran my hands through her silky tresses. “Haven’t showered yet, beautiful. You’re smelling stinky man. Went to the store right after my last three clients.” I kissed the crown of her head.
She made a sound low in her throat, inhaled again, and closed her eyes as if she was truly taking me in. A thrill of excitement and arousal slinked down my spine, but I didn’t let it reach its target. No way was I going to get hard while she initiated affection on her own. Usually it was me touching her in small ways, helping her up, changing her bandages, caressing her cheek and arm. I’d been very careful not to go too far past the intense kiss we’d had last week.
She’d run hot and cold with her emotions since our heated kiss, and I was leery of pushing her too much further outside her comfort zone so soon after the attack. The last thing I wanted was to hurt her. I still believe she needed the time to process what happened as well as come to terms with the idea that I wasn’t going anywhere, that I wanted to be with her and Lily.
“You know, you don’t have to buy groceries, come over, and cook every night.” Her tone held a note of concern, and the hand that was lying flat against my abdomen fisted and fell to her side.
Not wanting her to start backtracking, I moved on her, forcing her to look into my eyes. “I want to. Frankly, babe, I love having you guys to come home to after a full day at work. It gives me something to look forward to.” Her eyes were honest and reactive. I knew what I was dealing with when I looked into them. Right then she was open, welcoming, and appreciative of my presence. Fuck if I didn’t love seeing that look on her face and holding her in the crook of my arms. Gave me the little bit of hope I needed to keep working toward more.
I ran the pad of my thumb across her bottom lip. Her expression darkened and heated in the seconds I touched her. Then a smile brightened her pretty face.
“Monet, feeding you, being with this family… It’s what I want. Do you want me here?” I asked the question I’d been dying to ask. If she didn’t want me to be a part of all of this, I’d have to respect it, lick my wounds, and leave them be. At this point it would hurt like hell. I already felt connected and engaged in the day-to-day, and I had no desire to stop it anytime soon.
“Yes.” She winked. Winked. My chest filled with pride and a little something else I wasn’t ready to deal with. This stunning woman was burrowing into my heart and soul with every one of her smiles.
“There’s that word again, beautiful.” I smirked. “One day it’s going to get you into trouble, young lady.”
She snickered as I got a few inches closer, making my intention clear.
“I’m going to kiss you now. Is that okay?” I arched a brow, waiting, wanting, but giving her enough time to decide for herself.
Monet stared at me, myriad emotions rushing across her face as she took in my features. When her eyes landed on my lips, she bit down on hers, and I knew she wanted it. Wanted me.
“Yes.”
I laid my lips over hers, gently at first. I reached around her hip to bring her closer. With small movements, I varied the pressure of my lips against hers. She opened her mouth and sucked my bottom lip. I didn’t take the bait. Instead of taking her deep and wet, I rubbed my lips against hers, nibbling on the top lip, then the bottom. She followed my lead, running a hand from my abdomen up and over my chest to my neck, where she held me. God, I wanted her hands all over me.
“King Clay!” Lily screamed. I heard her feet pounding down the hallway coming closer.
I expected Monet to pull back as if burned, hiding our moment from prying little eyes, and was pleasantly surprised when she didn’t.
I was the one who pulled a few inches back. Her eyes were filled with delight. Not only was Monet stunning, exotic with her Asian-American features, she was breathtaking. Her lips were swollen from my kisses, reddened and succulent as a ripe berry. Not being able to hold back, I kissed her again, enjoying the pleasure of having this woman near.
Within moments a bundle of energy plowed into my legs from behind. “Stop kissing Mommy. I got a ’prize for you!” Lily hopped up and down, trying to pull me away from her mom.
I didn’t budge. I shifted away only after pecking her lips a couple more times, lost to the sensation of kissing Monet and having her so willing to kiss me back. It was a huge step in the direction I wanted us to go. “We’ll come back to this another time I hope.”
Her cheeks turned a rosy hue—which I liked seeing a fuck of a lot—before she answered. “Definitely.”
Finally, my woman was coming around. I felt like a million bucks.
“Clay!” Lily yanked at my forearm.
I turned around and kneeled. “What’s up, Your Majesty?”
She held up a big sheet of blank paper, about twelve by twelve inches in size.
“Honey, I don’t see anything.” I frowned.
She looked at me, then down at the paper. “It’s backward.” She giggled with glee and then turned the paper around.
Drawn on the page was a house with pointed rooftops and lots of trees around it. Had to be a castle in her garden.
“That’s a really cool castle. And is that your secret garden?” I asked, encouraging her.
Her entire face lit up, her smile leading the charge. “Yes! And there we are.” She pointed to three stick figures at the bottom of the page. The tallest one had yellow hair and what I think was an orange crown.
“Is that the king?”
“That’s you, King Clay!”
My heart constricted as I looked at the stick figure. A pair of black squares haphazardly colored in were his pants. He had no shirt and just a stick for a body. Most surprising was that he was in the center with his stick arms stretched out holding the hands of two other stick figures.
“And who are these two?” I knew the answer but needed to hear it anyway.
“That’s Mommy. She’s the princess. See her long hair?” She pointed at one of the figures in a triangle-shaped red dress with black hair so long it reached the hem of the dress. Then she pointed to the smallest one with a pink triangle for clothes. “That’s me. The queen.”
Again that pang knocked against my chest, and I rubbed at it. “This is awesome, sweetie. I love it. You’re an excellent artist like your Auntie Mi
la.”
She nodded ecstatically and said the one thing I would never have expected. “It’s our new family.”
As if my brain wasn’t in control, my head shot up and I looked at Monet. A kink speared into my neck like an icepick. Monet’s mouth opened in what I could only assume was shock. Had to be, because I felt those four words Lily said as if I’d been tazed.
“Can we put it on the fridge, Mommy?” Lily asked innocently.
Monet swallowed and stared at her daughter for a moment, and then she coughed and went into action. “Sure, honey.”
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
As much as I loved that Lily was adding me into the mix, into the family, it was too soon. Way too fucking soon. I knew I had hit the nail on the head when I saw Monet take the drawing from her daughter and put it on the fridge almost robotically, not saying a word.
“Hey, Lil, can you go draw another picture of your family, one with Atlas and Mila and the new baby coming? We can add that one to the fridge too.”
Her eyes got big, and she spun in a circle. “So fun!” she squealed and ran off back down the hall.
Once Lily was out of earshot, I approached Monet with a hand to her shoulder. “I don’t know what to say.” She flinched at my touch. A far cry from where we were two minutes before.
She flattened her lips. “I knew this was going to happen with you around every day.” She shook her hands in the air while starting to pace. “She’s attached to you. I can’t believe it.”
“Ouch, that hurt. Why wouldn’t she be attached to me? I’m a cool guy.” I stayed on the opposite side of the counter, allowing her some space to freak out. I’d rather she did it in front of me than go inside her head and push me away slowly.
Her head lifted and her gaze shot daggers. “Clay, she’s never attached to anyone this fast. Ever!” She spun around too fast, her arms shifting more quickly than I’d seen her move yet. A wince stole across her face, and she braced the counter to steady herself, breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth. I could tell her movement had twisted her back too far.
I sighed and reclined against the counter, gripping the rounded edge while I watched the woman I cared about pushing through her pain. It killed me not to go to her and comfort her, but I didn’t think that was what she needed or wanted just then.
“Look, I like Lily. Love her, even,” I said, allowing the truth of the words to roll around in my head.
“She’s easy to love,” Monet sighed, using the words Atlas always had when it came to the sweet little girl. “But I have to protect her.” She sucked in a harsh breath, and her head fell forward. “When you leave us, it will destroy her.”
When you leave us. When, not if.
I cringed and clenched my teeth at the severity of what she’d said. “Let’s get this straight, right now. Nothing in life is guaranteed, Monet. Fucking nothing. I’ve learned that the hard way too many times. I’ve had everything I’ve ever wanted dangled right before my eyes and then snatched away in an instant.” I clenched my teeth, remembering how much it hurt when Stacey’s lies were revealed. If I’d gotten through that—granted, it had taken years—there was no way I wasn’t going to fight for Monet, for what we were on the cusp of having together.
She lifted her shoulders and turned around to face me. Her posture exuded sadness and regret. I wanted so badly to scoop her into my arms and hold her, tell her it would be okay, because I had no intention of not seeing this through. Every day I came here put me one step closer to never wanting to leave.
“Beautiful, we have to take risks in life. No risk means no reward.”
Monet closed her eyes and slumped against the counter. “I don’t know if I can take that risk. It’s not just me in the picture. Not just my heart at stake here, Clay.” Her voice shook, and I could see the weight of concern and fear pressing down on her.
“I get that you’re a mother protecting your daughter. What you’re not seeing is that you don’t need to protect her from me.” I reached out but she backed away. The move hurt like a hundred bees stinging me at once.
She needed space, but fuck all if I wanted to give it to her. The metallic taste of blood hit my taste buds as I clenched my teeth around the inside of my cheek to hold back my frustration. My anger was not going to help her see the light.
A puff of air left her mouth, and she ran a shaky hand through her hair. “Her own father left. Didn’t want anything to do with her. You’ve known her just over a week. One week. He had two years.”
Everything she said was true, yet it still shoved a knife through my soul. I couldn’t imagine ever leaving Lily or Monet now that I’d had a small taste. I only wanted more.
Deciding to go for broke, I laid myself out there. “And in the past week, I’ve already fallen in love with her. No matter what happens to us, I’d never just bail on her.”
She shook her head and looked down at the floor. “You say that now, but…”
I couldn’t stop the forward momentum of my legs. They were going to her led by my heart, not my head. Moving slowly I put my arms on each side of the counter, trapping her in, forcing her to be inside the bubble of what I was feeling. “Monet, I’m saying I love her and I mean it. Don’t confuse me with your douchebag ex-husband. I’ve been here every day since what he did to you, and I’m not going anywhere.”
Her eyes filled with tears and she swallowed. “You barely know me,” she whispered, agony coating her tone.
“I know enough,” I fired back with a conviction I felt down to my toes. “Be in this with me. Take a chance.” The plea slipped from my tongue with no thought to hold it back. I needed her to find it inside of herself to commit. To take a chance on me.
Her chin trembled and her voice splintered. “You’re asking me to risk my heart. My daughter’s heart.”
I shook my head, cupped her cheek, and gave her everything I was capable of giving. “No. I’m asking you to allow a little room in that heart for me. Just a little for now. I’ll work toward filling it up so full you’ll be bursting with it.”
At my words, she curved her lips into a small smile, and I could see the fear fading from her eyes. It wasn’t much, but I’d take the tiny reprieve for what it was. A foot in the door.
“I’m scared,” she admitted.
Scared I could handle. Being pushed away…no. I licked my lips. “With reason. You have a lot at risk.” I’d give her that because she did. “Just know that I’m going to take what little you give and work to build on it. Regardless of what happens, I’ll be here, and I’ll sure as hell be here for Lily. You can count on that.”
She closed her eyes and a tear slipped from one and eased down her face. I swept it away with my thumb as she said, “You do love her.” It was a statement not a question.
I mentally did a jig knowing she was coming around. “She’s easy to love, remember?” I lifted my hand and ran a finger down Monet’s temple and then tunneled my fingers into her silky hair. I caressed her lower lip with my thumb. “Her mom’s not so hard to love either.”
She gulped, her eyes flying open. “Clay, don’t say things you don’t mean.”
“I wouldn’t do that. I know where things are headed, and I know they’re headed there fast. I can’t stop that train from moving full speed ahead, but I can try to pump the breaks a bit.” I shifted forward and kissed her softly, with enough pressure to know I meant every word. Just over a week in and I was falling hard and fast for Monet and her daughter.
“You could hurt me so easily,” she whispered against my lips.
God, don’t let me hurt her, I prayed softly. “I could, but I won’t.” I kissed her again with more intent, wanting her to feel my truth.
“Promise me you’ll go slow.” Her words sounded like a plea, not a demand. I would absolutely heed her request if that’s what it took for her to accept me as part of her world, as the man in her life.
“No reason to rush, beautiful.” I focused on her eyes, making sure she knew the magnit
ude with which I held this conversation.
She closed her eyes, cupped my cheeks with both hands, and pressed her forehead to mine. “Okay.”
“Okay, you’re going to take a chance on me?” I needed to hear the words. Her commitment to what was happening between us.
“Yes.” Her voice shook. “Yes,” she said again with more power and strength.
“And you’re going to trust me to be careful with you and Lily?” No matter what, I’d prove to her I was worthy of that trust.
She said that one word I was beginning to love. “Yes.”
I had to push it a little further just to make sure. “You’re going to start believing in this. In us?”
No hesitation this time when she replied, “Yes.”
“Can I have a million dollars?”
I felt her frown against my forehead and her fingers dig into my hair. “What?”
Thank God, she was following. I laughed, easing the tension between us. “Just making sure you were paying attention. With all those yeses, I had to be certain.”
She chuckled, and I took the opportunity to kiss her. Really kiss her. I laid my lips over hers and delved deep with my tongue. She was hesitant at first but soon got lost in the kiss and moaned, allowing me to go deeper. I couldn’t get deep enough, close enough. After a few minutes of kissing the living heck out of her, I ran my lips down her jaw and kissed along the column of her neck. I placed my mouth over the spot where her shoulder and neck met and licked and sucked. My special spot. I nibbled on the tasty flesh, and Monet pulled me closer, wrapping her nimble fingers around my neck, encouraging. Once I’d licked, kissed, and nibbled my way across her collarbone, I came back up, making sure to avoid the three-inch span of uncovered stiches.
Needing air, I pulled away from her mouth. “Christ, Monet, you’re the most radiant woman I’ve ever seen. You smell like jasmine and sunshine and taste like mint and heaven. I want to put my mouth on every inch of you. One day, when you’re better, I will. You hear me?”
“Clayton.” A solitary tear fell down her cheek.
Limitless Love: A Lotus House Novel: Book Four Page 9