I probably didn’t need that last sentence, but she has to know we mean business. She gets even angrier, throwing her hands up and screaming, “I’m tired of these rules. I can take care of myself!”
“Rebekah,” my father says slowly, his annoyance flooding his features. “Please understand—”
“That everything you do is to protect me? Yeah. Well, guess what, Father? I don’t need protecting. I need to be respect—”
“Take down one person, and you think you can take down the world,” I laugh.
“I can,” she throws at me, glaring. “And plus, what’s Killian going to do? He’s behind bars. He can’t get to me, so what is the worst that can happen?”
“He can brainwash you. Next thing you know, you’re trying to break him out,” Father says, but Rebekah doesn’t agree, rolling her eyes before falling back in her seat.
“I’m not naïve, Father, I just want to know what his intentions are—from his mouth.”
“No. You are not allowed to see him. Stay out of the bastille until further notice.”
“But the boys! They need me,” she cries, speaking of the guys she takes care of, but it’s best that she doesn’t go down there at all.
“They’ll be fine without you.”
“No, they will—”
I knew it was coming, but that doesn’t mean I don’t jump in surprise when my father’s fists slam onto the table, his finger coming out to point at Rebekah. “No more will come of this. It’s over. You got your closure, now leave it be.”
Glaring, she stands slowly as she bites out, “If you don’t give me some room to grow, Father, I’m not going to last. I will lash out.”
“If you’re implying that you’ll act like a toddler, my dear, we are all used to that.”
I swallow hard as her eyes start to flood, yet she holds her chin up high. “I won’t stand for this.”
Heading for the door, she slams it hard, leaving me feeling like utter shit. I didn’t want her leaving upset. I didn’t want her to hate us, which I think is what just happened. Getting up, I ignore my father when he calls my name, and I follow behind Rebekah.
“Rebekah,” I call as she stomps down the hall. She ignores me, though, so I call her name once more.
“What?”
She doesn’t turn to answer me, so I have to run to catch up, falling in step with her. “I need to speak with you.”
She scoffs, her little brows touching in frustration. “You mean you need to tell me how to live my life and demand I do what you tell me to do? You know what? I think I’ll pass.”
God, she knows how to get under my skin. Reaching for her, I take her forearm to stop her, to talk this out, but she tries to shake me off, fury burning in her eyes. She just doesn’t get it. She doesn’t understand that her life is at risk. Whipping her around, I slam her into the wall, and her head jerks back at me. I don’t mean to hurt her, but she just doesn’t understand. She could die.
“Oceanus!” JJ yells, but I ignore him, my hand coming to her throat and squeezing.
Holding her terrified gaze, I yell, “You feel that? That pain?”
Then I pull back, decking her in the face. “That?” I yell once more, shaking her. “That is pain. You feel that because you are still a fucking human, Rebekah. You are not immortal. You are not invincible like all of us!”
Angling her legs, she kicks me back, but I don’t go far, my eyes holding hers as the blood drips down her nose. I want to feel bad, but I can’t. She wants to be treated like everyone else? Well, here we go. She has to grasp that she is going to die if she doesn’t relax and let us protect her.
“You think I don’t know that? I do,” she yells back at me, but I shake my head.
“No. If you did, you’d understand why we are on high alert. Rebekah, please understand. This guy being here for you is basically treason from the Kelleys. This may very well start a war between our clans, my sister, and you are treating it like this is all no big deal, like this guy is innocent, like he’s not dangerous!”
“He isn’t. You don’t know him like I do.”
I go to tell her she doesn’t know shit, but her fist lands in the middle of my chest, and as she takes my jaw out with her elbow, she screams, “I can handle my fucking self!”
“Guys, calm down,” JJ tries, but neither of us pays him any mind, our gazes locked in hostility.
“Rebekah,” I try, but she’s still raging.
“You treat me like a fucking baby. I’m stronger than most, and I’m human. What does that even say? Don’t know? Let me tell you,” she yells, going toe-to-toe with me. “That I’m a fucking badass!”
With that, I push her so hard that she falls back and rolls twice, landing on her face hard with a loud oomph. JJ tries to stop me, but I shake out of his hold, going to her and looking down at her. “And what if you meet someone like me? You can’t beat me, sister!”
“No one is like you,” she roars, standing up and stretching her shoulders back. “You big dick.”
She’s a pain. “Rebekah, this guy, the one you feel isn’t dangerous because you ‘know him,’ he is obviously on a level we don’t understand. He isn’t like other shifters. He didn’t change automatically when the silver hit his wrist. He fought me off, almost broke my grasp. It took three of us to hold him before the silver should have taken him down. And then it didn’t, Rebekah! It was like a bracelet to the guy. His skin burned, but that was it,” I stress, my eyes pleading. “My sister, please, I beg of you. This guy is something insane. I don’t even know what to do. I don’t even know how to stress to you how you must stay away.”
But I don’t think she is listening. Leaning toward her, I hold her gaze, dropping my voice so maybe she’ll listen. “I know you,” I say, slowly reaching out to her. She moves away, but just for a moment before I wipe the blood away from her nose. “I know you want to fix this. I know you want to redeem him, that maybe you have a crush. But, my love, it cannot happen. He was sent to kill you, Rebekah. And I’m sorry, selfish as it is, I cannot lose you.”
That has her looking away, her eyes filling with tears. Holding her chin, I force her to look at me. “I love you, Rebekah, so much, and I just want you safe. I know you can fight the lot of them, and you would, but I can’t let you die. I need you to take a step back. Let us handle this.”
“Why can’t I—”
“Because you are a liability, sister. They got into our home, our sanctuary. This is mind-blowing. If I’m to protect this home, and you, I need to know that you are safe and that you won’t try to see this guy or fix anything. Just stay put.”
“Stay put?” she asks incredulously. “I’m not fucking three, Osh.”
I nod. “I know. We all know, Rebekah. But please understand, we are doing this because we all love you and want you safe.”
JJ appears beside us, his hand coming to her back, his eyes full of love like mine. “We don’t doubt that you can take out anyone who comes at you, but we ask that you don’t put yourself in danger, my sweet darling. Losing you would break this family.”
She is still fired up, I can see that, but I think I got to her. Especially when she answers, “Fine.”
Making sure, though, I lift her chin, forcing her to look at me. “You understand why, though. Please don’t think it’s ’cause we don’t think you can handle yourself.”
She nods stubbornly. “It’s ’cause I could die.”
“Exactly. I love you, my sweet sister. Don’t forget that,” I say, and a part of me is scared that when I come back, she won’t be here. She won’t be alive. I fully expect her to go down and see that guy. I do, but I pray she will be smart while doing so.
Eyeing me, she asks, “While I love you too, Osh, why does it sound like you’re leaving?”
My lips curve as I let her face go. She really is amazing. “So quick.”
“Told ya I can handle myself.”
I scoff as I shake my head. “It sounds like I’m leaving because I am. We all are, ex
cept you and Cyrus. We are going to visit the clans, spend a few days with them to check things out.”
“Stay with them? They live down the road.”
“Yes, but we want to show our presence. Father does this a lot.”
She nods. “Okay.”
I can see in her face that she is excited we’re leaving. She will go down to the bastille. I should tell her not to go, to be careful, but I know she won’t listen. Instead, I remind her. “Okay, don’t do anything stupid.”
“I wish I had a dollar for every time you said that,” she says, her lips coming to my temple.
Laughing, I back away, shaking my head. “You’d be rich.”
Along with dead.
Deep inside my soul, I know that my words are falling on deaf ears and that she’ll go down there. She’ll go find him and talk to him. Not sure what will be said, but I’m sure she’ll want to save him. I just pray she isn’t stupid about it.
But I’m pretty sure my prayers will go unanswered.
Chapter Thirteen
“Do you think this will be our last date?”
A sullen smile pulls at my lips as I look over at Taegan. We’re on the very back lot, near the river that runs around her family’s compound. Her eyes are wide and happy, and her face is flushed from our recent lovemaking. Closing my eyes, I suck in a deep breath, but I know the answer. Reaching over, I hold her face, rubbing her jaw with my thumb.
“I think so.”
“That’s depressing.”
“It is.”
This whole trip has been depressing. Our trip to the Kelleys’ was unsuccessful. They denied everything. Even when we came at them with the pictures of Thomas’s car, they said the car had been stolen. They even handed us police reports, but that gave them away. People of the Works never go to human police; they go to my father for any issues. So we all know they’re lying, but my father is sitting on it, which I think is dumb. I feel we should toss Frank Kelley into the bastille, throw away the key, let him rot away. But Father wants to wait a while, see what he can figure out.
Which I think is naïve of him.
We went to the witches next, and they guaranteed us they were loyal, and I don’t think any of us ever really questioned that. Next were the vampires, who, again, were solid. They were loyal and things were fine, but then Jonas said he was taking a side trip. None of us thought anything about it, but come to find out, he went to New Orleans with a girl who is not in a leadership position, and my father is pissed. Now the only way Jonas will ever lead the Patchwork is if the other four members of our family die, which is highly unlikely. I asked him what he was doing, and he told me he loved her. So I didn’t question him anymore. It’s his life, not mine.
I think my father feels differently, which is why we are heading to New Orleans after this stop at the Conners’. This stop, which could very well be my last time with Taegan.
“We should just say fuck it and be together,” she says then, and I smile.
“’Cause that would go over great, I’m sure.”
She laughs, an easygoing sound, and her body vibrates against mine as she lays a soft kiss to my jaw. “It would make us happy, though.”
“It would,” I agree, turning my face to look at her. Her hair is falling in her eyes, and she’s gorgeous with her lips swollen from our kisses. “But it will also get you in a lot of trouble if word got back to your fiancé. Mutiny, I’m sure.”
She rolls her eyes. “I hate him.”
“Do you?”
“Yes, he isn’t you, for one, and for two, he is a snob,” she says, the same distaste I have for him in her voice. “And while he is mighty attractive, I think he thinks I’m a good fit just because I’m pretty—”
“Stunning, you mean,” I supply, and she gives me a deadpan look.
“Whatever, and then I have this feeling inside me, like I know, I just know, he is going to smack me around. I can see it in his face.”
Clenching my fists, I feel my nails bite into my palms. “I swear to God, Tae, he hits you, you call me.”
“And, what?” she asks, looking up at me, her eyes misting. “You’ll come save me? Risk war with his family just to save me? I’m fucked. I’m leaving this place, the person I love, and my family to go start a life where I’m basically just a breeder, making babies for this guy. I won’t have a life of my own. I’ll have his life, and I sure as hell will hate it. I’m certain.”
Swallowing hard, I don’t want to hear her words. I don’t want to see the truth, her future. I can’t. It hurts. Wrapping my arms around her, I pull her in tight, kissing her nose, then her cheek before her lips. “I wish there was another way.”
“Me too, but there isn’t. Guess that’s what I get for being so pretty,” she teases, and I smile, my eyes falling shut against her silky hair.
“Yeah,” I say softly, my heart in my throat. As much as it pains me, I know I can’t let her go into her marriage like this. She’ll never be happy. I want her to be happy with me, I do, but that can’t happen. It won’t happen, and because of that, I have to make sure she has a good life. A life she will love. “Maybe you should try.”
I feel her tense beside me. “What?”
“Try to love him.”
Pulling back, she looks down at me incredulously. “Excuse me? I will never love him. I love you.”
Looking up at her, I wrap her hair behind her ear and slowly nod. “And I truly will never love anyone but you, my love. But I can’t go on knowing you are not happy. As much as I will suffer, I can’t allow you to.”
“I will as long as we’re not together, Osh,” she snaps, her eyes going wild.
“I know. Tae, please don’t get angry. Listen to me,” I say, reaching out taking her jaw so she can’t look away. “If you go into this with an open mind, maybe things can change. Maybe you’ll be happy and love him, and he won’t smack you around because he’ll respect you. I doubt he wants to marry you, he was in love with the last girl, so both of you will be healing. But maybe you can fall for each other and have a good life together.”
Moving away from my touch, she shakes her head. “I can’t believe you are saying this.”
“I’m saying it because I love you, and I want you to have a good life. Give him a chance. Marry him, love him, and make a life together that you’ll be proud of.”
“I don’t want a life with him. I want it with you.”
I nod. “I want the same thing, but we can’t have it. It wouldn’t be good, Tae. We wouldn’t be happy because we’d be constantly watching our backs and fighting with our families. You know it’s true.”
She looks away. “That wouldn’t be the case if you were the leader of your fucking clan.”
She’s angry and I understand why, but she’s killing me. “I know. I’m sorry.”
She swallows hard. I can’t let her leave me with the mind-set she has now. I want her to be happy. Clearing my throat, I whisper, “Marry him. I want you to.”
“No, you don’t,” she challenges, and I shake my head.
“I do, I want you to be happy, and if he can give you the life you deserve, then please, be happy and marry him.”
“I deserve to be with you,” she tries, sitting up completely away from me.
Straightening with her, I look at the side of her face as a tear rolls down her cheek. “Maybe you don’t,” I say, and it’s really hard to choke out. “If you did, I’d say fuck my family, fuck my spot as the leader, and I’d run with you. I’d take you so far away we’d never be found. But I won’t leave.”
Looking over at me, she scrunches her face up as she shakes her head. “So you don’t love me? Is that what you’re saying?”
I scoff. “Taegan, my love for you could move mountains. It could. But it isn’t enough to make me leave the Works with you, and that’s not fair to you. You should be with someone who would leave it all behind.”
Her eyes darken as she eyes me. “You’re lying.” I don’t move, and I watch her as she glar
es at me. “You’re saying this because you think I can be happy. I’m not dumb, Oceanus. Don’t disrespect me by saying things you don’t mean to try to protect me. I know damn well you’d leave it all for me, but you won’t because I could be killed. I know you. I know you better than anyone in this world, and I love you for it.”
Looking away, I feel my own tears cloud my eyes as I shake my head. “I only want you to be happy, and if it can’t be with me, then I want you to try with someone else.”
“So we’re breaking up?”
I swallow hard. I hadn’t realized we were. “Do we have a choice?”
“I don’t want to break up.”
“Nor do I,” I say, struggling with my words. “But how can you focus on your future if I’m holding you back?”
She doesn’t move or say a word. We sit in the clear blackness, listening to the sounds of frogs and other wildlife moving throughout the meadow. The river is rushing, it’s so peaceful, but on its banks, two hearts are breaking. I’ll never love anyone as much as I love her, that’s a given. While it pains me to think of her with him, I have to believe she can find happiness. Closing my eyes, I wish things were different. I wish we never had to leave this meadow. Just the two of us.
Together.
When she leans her head against my shoulder, I suck in a breath as she slowly nods. “Fine, I’ll try. But I will never stop loving you.”
Smiling, I move my lips to the top of her head. “Promise?”
When she looks up at me, my lips fall to her nose, and she smiles. “I promise.”
We both smile. “I promise too.”
What an easy promise that is to make.
***
When we left the Conner home, it was hard to keep my emotions under wraps as I said good-bye to Taegan. I think I felt it would be the last time I saw her. As much as I wanted to believe she’d come to my room at night, I think we both knew that last night was good-bye. I don’t know what will happen with the wedding, and I don’t want to think of it at all. I want to be there to support her, to show my love, and to let her know I understand, but at the same time, I’m pretty sure it will kill me.
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