He held me tight, his hardness pressing against my stomach. I gasped in his mouth, feeling his longing against me. My nipples pricked, and I reached around his shoulders to hold him all that much tighter.
His hands roved my body and under my skirt, caressing up my thigh and between my legs. His fingers grazed over my panties, sending a jolt of electricity through me. I pushed him back, regaining control. I couldn’t do this now. It was too much, too fast.
“Wait,” I said. Sneaking around him and walking toward the living room. “I’m not ready for this.”
He followed me into the living room where I collapsed onto an armless black sofa, folding my hands in my lap. He stood across the room looking at me with hungry eyes.
“What did that ex of yours do to you, Zoe?”
“Who? Andy?”
“Yes.”
“Why are you asking me that now?”
“I know he hurt you. I assure you, I’m not him.”
“No Billy, you aren’t him. You are you,” I said, looking down at the floor. “But if you must know. I’ll tell you what happened. Andy and I had been together for two years when we bought a townhouse together on Queen Anne. We’d even talked about getting married. I loved him. At least I thought I did.” I still didn’t look William in the eye. “Six months ago, he cleaned out my savings account and skipped town. I guess he was in some serious trouble with the mob for gambling debts. He went down to South America or something. I have no idea.
“After he left, I found out he’d taken out massive mortgages on the house and opened credit cards in my name. I lost the house and had to pay off all the debt. I had to sell my BMW. I’d been sitting pretty on a nice nest egg and a beautiful house; then suddenly, it was all gone. I had to move back in with Stacy. Luckily her roommate had just moved out so I had somewhere to go. I’ve been behind on rent since I moved in. I finally got most of the debt paid off so that I can actually breathe a little. I’ve been living hand to mouth the last few months. Every time I got a tiny bit of money, the creditors snatched it away.”
“Couldn’t you fight that? It sounds like identity theft.”
“Sure. But that takes time. The banks want their blood. They don’t wait. They froze all my accounts and garnished my wages. It was a lot of debt, and I couldn’t hide from it.”
He swooped into the seat next to me, so close I could feel his breath on my hair. He took my hand and held it to his chest before he raised it to his mouth and kissed my knuckles.
“How terrible. I have a team of lawyers at my beck and call. I can help you.”
I pulled my hand away and clutched it in my lap. “I don’t need your help. I’ve already taken care of it. Now that I can afford a lawyer, I’m going to hire one and get the banks to refund my money and repair my credit. I was way too far in the hole to do it before. No one would even take my case.”
“If you won’t let me help you financially, at least let me take you away from town for a couple of days. We can take my yacht out to my cabin on the Sound. It’s exactly what you need right now.”
I thought about getting away from town and spending a few days in a cabin on one of the many islands in Puget Sound. I wanted to get away from my tiny apartment with the dingy carpets, the constant stress of my debt, and the sinking feeling of failure that was now palpable after seeing my sister.
“Sure, why not. But I’m not jumping in the sack with you. I’m not even sure I’m even ready to be in a relationship yet, especially with you. You need to respect that. And take that damn picture off the wall in your bedroom. I can’t stand that you have it there.”
“But it’s beautiful…” he whined.
I rolled my eyes. “Just do it, or I’m not going.”
“Okay, I will. My car will pick you up at 9 a.m. tomorrow. Be ready.”
At nine on the nose, there was a knock at my front door. A driver stood in my doorway and offered to take my bag. He carried it down to the car and held the door for me to get inside.
I was beginning to like the pampering and that scared me. Thinking William’s money would somehow effect my lifestyle was a slippery slope I did not want to go down. I was getting my life back on track. I’d paid down all the debt. Maybe when the identity theft lawsuit went through, I’d get some of it back. Now I could finally save money again and think about the future for the first time in six months.
We arrived at the marina and the driver carried my bag down the pier and stopped in front of a large yacht. Something about a yacht just screams money. I gulped as I stared up at the three story monstrosity. William leaned over the railing, wearing white pants and a blue button down shirt. He smiled and waved.
I walked up the stairs to the main deck, and William put his hands on my shoulders and kissed both my cheeks. We sat on a deckchair under a green umbrella with a slight breeze ruffling the fabric. I’d worn a gauzy summer dress and the cool air instantly made my nipples hard. William smiled at me and popped a cherry in his mouth.
I looked down at the spread on the table as the yacht’s motors rumbled below deck. The anchor was hoisted, and we glided over the water into the bay. After we’d eaten, I stood to look out over the water.
We navigated past Banbridge Island and out into the open ocean. I could see a pod of whales thrusting up and crashing down in a white spray of water. A lone pelican flew past our ship on massive wings before it skimmed its beak just below the water’s surface.
William put his hand around my waist and pulled me into his hip. His body felt strong and solid next to mine, and I let myself sink into his warmth. I wanted to believe this wasn’t a huge mistake that would break my heart and mess with my head in a million different ways.
I wanted to have my Billy back. As we gazed out over the silver-blue water of the Sound and watched the wildlife glide by, I almost believed I could.
The trip took several hours, which we spent looking through binoculars at the whales and dolphins who visited the Sound. William seemed to know a great deal about the flora and fauna of the area. I suspected it had become one of his new obsessions since getting the boat.
Finally, we pulled up to a small island that looked like a mass of green trees and white beaches. We docked on an empty pier. After we walked down the pier we got on a four wheeler that waited for us. William drove us up a gravel road.
A flock of sea birds skittered across the road as we ducked into the shade of the forest. I looked around at the old growth Douglas fir and massive sword ferns. It reminded me of where I’d grown up. With all the chaos in my life lately, I’d had little time to get away from the city and fill my lungs with fresh air.
We turned a corner and headed toward a sprawling three story log house. The front yard was a lush green lawn fenced by short boxwood hedges.
“That is not a cabin,” I yelled over the motor.
“Perhaps cabin was an understatement. Log home would be technically more accurate.”
“Log mansion?”
The crew pulled up behind us with our luggage and William led me toward the house. We walked up the front steps onto a wraparound porch and went inside.
The front hall gleamed with local hardwood, polished to a high sheen. The entrance ceiling rose all the way to the third floor and opened into a skylight.
“I bought the island from a tech guru who wanted to sell. The foundation for the house had been poured and plans drawn up. I thought, why not. I need a place to get away. So I bought it.”
“Hmm. Lucky you,” I said, taking in the rustic luxury of my surroundings. We walked into a massive living room with floor to ceiling windows that looked over the water.
“I need to get away sometimes, to be alone. But, I’ll probably turn this island into a resort, eventually,” he said, sitting down on a dark brown leather sofa with his arms slung over the back. “I don’t need this whole place for myself.”
I walked across the room, kicked off my shoes and curled up on the couch next to him. He dropped his arm around my waist and
drew me to him. I lifted my gaze to his. He gripped my chin with his hand and lifted my face. His hazel eyes burned down on me, his expression unreadable. A low growl rumbled in the back of his throat, and he pressed his lips to mine.
Instinctively, I opened my mouth, allowing his tongue to dart between my lips. My tongue slid over his and electric tingles surged from my mouth and across my body. He pulled me into his hard chest, running his hands over my ass and gripping firmly on my flesh.
I clung to his neck as he cupped my face, kissing me frantically. His hand slid down my front and began pulling my dress down over my breasts. I gasped and grabbed my dress.
“We need to take this slow,” I whispered. I wasn’t doing a very good job of going slow myself.
“Lunch is served on the deck, sir,” a voice said behind us.
“Very good,” he said, turning his head halfway behind him to acknowledge his servant. He turned back to me and helped me pull my clothes back on.
“All better now?” he said, leading me to the deck overlooking the water. A cool wind blew up over the polished wood deck, but warm air circulated around my legs from a nearby outdoor heater. It was summer, but the air right on the ocean could be uncomfortably cold.
We were served a delicious gourmet lunch of local seafood - swordfish, clams, and shrimp - with perfect risotto and flaky sourdough rolls.
After lunch, we went to our separate rooms and changed into our swimsuits to spend the afternoon in the hot tub. We were served champagne and strawberries while we watched the ships float by out in the ocean. I sat with my chin on the edge of the hot tub, contemplating my feelings as I took in the view.
William waded over next to me and ran his hand down my back. I glanced over at him to see fire in his eyes. I turned around slowly and sat close to his powerful body. He pulled me in with a magnetic force.
He traced my jaw with his finger and gently pulled my face toward his. I leaned into him as his lips met mine. It was a short, soft kiss. “We should probably get out now,” I whispered.
We rose from the tub and put on fluffy white robes and flip flops to walk through the house and back upstairs. My room was down the hall from his. I stood in the hall and glanced toward his room. He waited in his doorway, his half open bathrobe exposing his chiseled chest that glistened with water. I thought about licking it off. He rested his elbow on the door frame as he stared at me. I felt my breath catch.
I backed toward my door and slipped inside. I closed it behind me and stood with my back against it, breathing heavily. I slid to the floor and held my face in my hands. I didn’t know what I was doing here. Was I leading him on? Was I going to let myself go there? My body throbbed remembering the hungry look on his face. Every time he touched me it was like electricity on my skin.
The more time we spent together, the more inevitable it felt that we would end up in bed again. The last time I’d been with Billy, I’d gotten pregnant. The depression over losing him and having the miscarriage caused me to drop out of school. After just a few months of being in Seattle, I’d already given up on my dreams.
It was a horrible pattern I had. When things got really tough, I checked out. When my mom died, I nearly dropped out of school. When Billy left me, I actually did. Since the fiasco with Andy, I’d barely been hanging on. If it hadn’t been for the love I felt for my dance troop, I might have lost it again.
I was terrified of going back down that road with Billy again. The last time I almost didn’t make it. I spent days wrapped up in my bed, not talking to anyone. It was the worst I’d ever been, and I couldn’t even tell anyone about it. I couldn’t let it happen to me again.
I stayed in my room for the rest of the night and slept late the next morning. When I finally emerged at eleven, I found William sitting on the deck eating brunch, dressed for a hike. I sat down at the table and squinted into the gray and blue distance. The sky hung hazy and low and the water thrashed with white caps on the horizon. I picked up a piece of bacon and idly munched on it.
“I’m glad you’re up,” he said. “I was about to go for a hike. Now you can join me.”
I’d already dressed in hiking appropriate clothing, having had the same idea myself. I’d thought maybe I would go alone. Every moment I spent with William felt like an invitation to heartache.
After we finished brunch, he packed a backpack with water and power bars and we took a four wheeler up the gravel road to the trailhead. He told me the trail wound up to an amazing view where we could see the entire island.
We set out on the trail. His pace was faster than mine. I tried to keep up as he charged up the hillside. William never did anything half way. It was always full bore with him. I preferred to walk more slowly and take in the sights. I slowed my pace and let him walk off without me. The cynical part of my brain wondered how long it would take him to notice he’d walked away from me, but it only took him a minute to realize I’d dropped behind.
It was a small comfort in the scheme of things, but it made me immensely happy. I felt like he was finally noticing me. That was a huge step forward. We stopped near a spring that flowed down into a waterfall and fed the stream that wound down the hill. He handed me the water bottle, and I took a long chug under the shade of an ancient Douglas fir tree. The smell of the forest filled my lungs and gave me a sense of peace. I’d really needed this time away from the city.
We continued onward, up the slope, until we crested the hill and came to a clearing that looked down on the ocean below. The view was spectacular. The breeze swept up the hill and stole the breath from my lungs, literally taking my breath away. William put his hand around my waist. I was sweaty from the exertion, but the air at the top of the hill was cool. It made me shiver.
He drew me into his hot body. I could feel the dampness of his skin through the thin hiking shirt he wore.
“I’m really glad I came,” I said, looking out at the ocean and the island below. The sky hung low with dark storm clouds. A raindrop fell on my cheek.
“Good. I was afraid you didn’t really want to be here.”
“It’s not that. It’s just hard for me to be around you.”
“Why?”
“You screwed up my life you know.”
“I did what?” he said, letting me go and stepping away to look down at me. “How?”
“You got me pregnant.”
“And?”
“And then you dumped me.”
“You pushed me. You wouldn’t stop or listen. You didn’t give me a chance. On the most important day of my life, you called me from an abortion clinic! If I’d let you, you would have ruined my life.”
“Is that how you see it, Billy?”
“I-I think you could have at least allowed me time to talk to you. It wasn’t like we were a casual, one-night-stand. I loved you. You loved me. It was a massive betrayal. Your continued refusal to see that is exactly the reason I never called you or reached out to you.”
“But you put a naked picture of me in your bedroom!” I turned and started walking back down the hill.
“Zoe, wait.”
I started to run as the sky broke open. Rain poured in buckets, dumping down on me as I ran with William right behind me. My hair was instantly drenched, my shoes soggy and sloshing. He caught up and ran in front of me, forcing me to stop.
“Listen to me.” He said, gripping my shoulders, his eyes gleaming through the pouring rain. I threw his hands off me and twisted away toward the edge of the path.
The violent jolt caused me to lose my balance just as my footing slipped. The gravel below me gave way on the edge of a sharp drop off, and I descended in a split second. Billy had reached for me, trying to prevent my fall, but he was caught in the avalanche of loose dirt spilling down the hillside. I screamed in panic as my ass hit the flowing mud and gravel barreling downward.
I barely missed a tree as I rocketed to the bottom of a ravine with Billy just behind me. I hit the forest floor hard, falling forward on my hands and knees. Billy
fell into me, pushing me into the mud. He stood behind me as I floundered, my face covered in brown sludge. Struggling to rise, his hand appeared in front of my fuzzy vision. I grabbed it, looking for any anchor to get me back on solid ground.
I stood, wiping my face with the inside of my shirt. The rain pelted me, clearing the rest of the dirt and grit from my face. Billy stood before me, breathing heavily, wild desperation in his eyes. I stepped back, hitting the wide trunk of a tree behind me.
“You ruined my life, William Black,” I screamed through the pouring rain, gripping the rugged bark of the trunk for safety.
“How?” he said, holding open his hands that were filled with rain.
“Because!” I shouted, not knowing what to say. It had all been said.
He moved toward me slowly, like someone approaching a skittish animal. He raised his hand cupping my cheek, distance still between our bodies.
A tear tumbled down my cheek, obscured by the rain. I gasped as more followed. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to hold back the tide. He closed the distance between us. In a split second, he held me in his arms. I could smell the musky scent of his body mixed with the fresh scent of rain. He looked down at me, his eyes shining like stars.
“Because… you weren’t in it,” I said, my voice breathy. “You took yourself away from me.” The realization that I was angry at him for not being in my life, flooded into me like a tidal wave. But, he was here now.
His mouth descended in a rush. Lips pressed hard against lips. I clung to him, wrapping my arms under his and around his back. His hard, solid body pressed me against the trunk of the tree. My lips parted, and I licked and bit at his lower lip. He pressed his tongue inside my mouth, flicking and teasing at mine. I felt his shaft rise firm and thick against my stomach, sending a shiver of desire through my core.
His hot mouth explored my neck while his hand cupped my breast. I opened my legs as he bent down to press between them. I gasped and he claimed my mouth again, kissing me ferociously. I melted into his kiss, wanting him to take me right then and there.
Condoned (Beauty And The Billionaire Geek Book 3) Page 3