by Ash, Nikki
I do notice that hanging out with Hayley today seems different than before. She hasn’t once tried to come on to me; she hasn’t tried to touch me, or even flirt. Thinking about it, since the day at Bentley’s house in Breckenridge when I refused to share a room with her, she hasn’t tried anything. Not that she was so forward before. Just a touch here, a flirtatious smile or comment there, but now… nothing, and for some reason it makes me want her. It makes me want to make her want me. I am one fucked up son-of-a-bitch.
After we eat dessert I say goodbye and wish everyone a Merry Christmas in case I don’t see them beforehand. Hayley decides to leave at the same time so I walk her out.
“Have a good Christmas Caleb.” She gives me a bright smile. Fuck! That smile has my dick twitching. It makes me want to cover her lips with mine, to feel her smile against me. It makes me want to take her right here on the hood of her car. I don’t know what the hell has gotten into me today.
“You too, Hayley,” I say before she shuts her door, turns on the ignition, and drives away.
Four
Hayley
To say I was shocked Caleb was actually joining us for dinner was an understatement. I had already made the decision to stop pursuing him weeks ago at the ski resort but that doesn’t mean his presence doesn’t affect me. When he showed up in a navy blue collared shirt that made his blue eyes pop, hair still damp and wild from the shower, and in jeans that fit his ass perfectly, I couldn’t decide if I wanted to first run my fingers through his messy hair, grab his ass, or run my hands down the wash board abs I know are hidden under his shirt.
A while back Kayla decided to surprise Bentley with a trip to a resort overnight and thought she could play matchmaker by having Caleb and I babysit together. I showed up to their apartment at the same time Caleb was walking out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel. I honestly thought I was going to orgasm right there on the spot.
His body was not only covered in sexy as hell tattoos but he was also sporting a nipple ring. A fucking nipple ring! It took everything in me not to run straight to him to lick the nipple ring, and while licking it, I could have just run my hands down his rock-hard abs. I wasn’t aware of the restraint I was capable of until that moment.
Of course, he nearly freaked out and hurried to his room. He could cover himself all he wanted, that visual was engrained into my brain –and vagina– and not going anywhere anytime soon. Needless to say, Caleb’s sexy-as-sin body has become my focal point of most of my self-inducing orgasms these days.
So, when he walked in to Ashley’s house, I thought it would be best to watch the television and not him. If I stared at him too long I couldn’t be held responsible for the things that would come out of my mouth. I thought I was in the clear but then he sat next to me and I could smell his cologne –not too strong, just a light fresh clean scent– and it took everything in me not to lean over and give him a good sniff.
After he told us about Marco, I could see how much he really cared about him. The worry in his face was heartbreaking. Dinner and dessert thankfully went smooth, and I was really proud of myself for remaining cool around Caleb. I think he was more comfortable around me today as well and that confirmed what I already knew; he isn’t into me. But it also gave me hope we could be friends. Caleb is a good guy, and I would rather have him as a friend than not at all.
After getting home I text my sister to let her know I will be over to mom and dad’s house Christmas morning first thing. The guy she is dating is joining her, so she begged me to be there when they arrive. It will be dad’s first-time meeting one of our boyfriends, which is making her nervous. Hannah is a lot like me. While she is three years younger, she is my best friend. She focused on school and college and then law school. I seriously missed the hell out of her while she was away at law school and was so excited to learn she would be moving back to accept an amazing job offer here in Las Vegas as a defense attorney for a prestigious law firm. Once she was settled into her job she decided to start dating, and after quite a few duds she met Gavin.
They were at a mediation meeting –he was council for the other side– and they hit it off. They waited until the case was resolved and then went out. They have been together for about four months now and are inseparable. Because our parents were vacationing with my Aunt and Uncle in New York they haven’t met Gavin yet and will be meeting him on Christmas. I am definitely curious to see how they act. It’s like a trial run for when, or I guess I should say if I ever bring someone home.
After showering and pouring myself a glass of wine, I snuggle up on my couch to get caught up on The Bachelor. It is one of my favorite shows. It’s so hilarious watching the women get all catty with each other, fighting over one man. I also love to watch their one-on-one dates. They are always so romantic. I would give anything for a guy to take me on a date like the ones they go on.
My phone dings with a text from Cooper reminding me the gym will be closed the next few days for Christmas and will open back up afterwards. I text him back wishing him and Liz a Merry Christmas and decide to go to bed.
As I walk through the house turning the lights off and double-checking the locks I feel the loneliness that surrounds me. It seems like everyone is with someone besides me. Even Ashley and Kaden have each other. Sure, they are only friends but they hang out so often they might as well be together. I wonder if Caleb ever feels lonely. Does he lie in bed at night and wish someone were next to him?
After brushing my teeth and washing my face I lay down in my dark room and turn the television on, turning it down to almost mute. The light and sound makes me feel a little less alone. Cuddling up in my down blanket I think about how I got to this point. Back in high school when I was so hell-bent on studying and getting good grades, I told myself college was where I would meet someone. The problem was, while in college I got cheated on and so I told myself it would be best to wait until after I graduated. Medical School came and went and I was so busy studying I didn’t have time to date anyway. Geez… when was the last time I even had sex? There was that one guy I met at the party Kaden threw. How long ago was that? It must have been well over a year ago. I seriously need to get laid.
My issue is at thirty years old I want more. While a one-night stand would definitely scratch my itch, I really want my house to be less quiet. I was so excited when I purchased this home. With four bedrooms and two and a half bathrooms, I envisioned finally having a family. The backyard is perfect to set up a swing-set next to the underground pool. I can see myself having play dates and barbeques.
While volunteering at a local YMCA last year, there were people from DCF encouraging us to sign up to be a foster parent. I filled out the paperwork and got approved thinking if I don’t meet Mr. Right I can always adopt. I haven’t fostered anyone yet, though. I think I keep hoping I will meet someone and we will choose to create kids together. Now if I could just find someone. The question is how do I meet someone if all I ever do is go to work and then come home? I need to get out more often. Maybe I will ask Ashley to join me one night. Hell, maybe I should just woman up and go out by myself.
I make a promise to myself that after the holidays I am going to try to meet a guy. I am never going to meet anybody if I don’t try. And then I remember the dating site Ashley once mentioned. Maybe I can meet a guy on there. I roll over to the middle of the bed and stretch out wrapping my body around the body pillow and wish that one day there will be a warm body next to me.
Five
Hayley
Christmas was overall a great holiday. Mom made Christmas breakfast while we watched the Disney parade on television. It’s a tradition I look forward to every year. Her cinnamon buns were mouth-watering delicious like they are every year. Dad and Gavin hit it off and watched football the rest of the day while Hannah, mom, and I cooked Christmas dinner and made cookies. I love that even though Hannah and I are older and there are no kids running around, mom still makes cookies with us every year just like she did when we wer
e little.
After dinner, Gavin got down on one knee and proposed to Hannah. It was a sweet proposal and the ring he gave her was beautiful. She, of course said yes, and the rest of the evening was focused on when they plan to get married and where they plan to live. I am thankful Gavin’s family mostly live local so they are planning to make roots here. They even talked about looking for a house in the same neighborhood as mine.
Of course mom and dad had to point out several times throughout the night that I am three years older and still single with no kids. Hannah came to my rescue insisting I am still young and have plenty of time but I know they are right. It just solidifies my plan to take the initiative to meet Mr. Right.
It’s been three days since Christmas and I am back to work. I joined the dating site Ashley recommended and actually have a date tonight with a guy name Greg. He is a few years older than me and owns a construction company locally. We agreed to meet at a restaurant in the area. I don’t know this guy so I figured it would be safer to meet somewhere public instead of him picking me up.
I am about to leave when Alex, one of the fighters comes over and asks me to take a look at his ankle. It’s been bugging him a lot recently. I tell him to head into my office and I will meet him there. I grab my purse from the locker room so I don’t have to grab it afterwards and see Caleb and Marco fighting in the ring. I am glad to see Marco here. If he’s here he is safe. Caleb is showing him how to do a move correctly and Marco is watching with complete rapture. Caleb catches me watching and grants me a slight smile. I give him a small wave and head to check out Alex’s ankle.
“Which ankle is it?” I ask Alex. He points to his right ankle so I grab it gently and place it on the medical bed examining it. I feel for any tension and when I hit a certain spot he jumps in pain.
“I take it, it hurts there.” I smile at Alex before touching it again making him jump in pain.
He smiles back a boyish grin. “Hey now! What did I ever do to you?”
“Oh don’t be a baby. I just had to make sure that’s where it hurts.”
I have known Alex since I started working here but never paid attention to how cute he is. While he isn’t hot like Caleb, he definitely has that whole boy next-door look going for him.
“It looks like you just sprained it. I don’t think it’s fractured and it’s definitely not broken. Keep it up and alternate between cold and hot compressions. I want to see you back in a couple days to make sure it’s healing ok.”
“Thanks Doc.” He gives me a wink as he carefully jumps down on his good ankle.
I lock up my office and head out the door when I see Marco leaning against the outside window staring at his phone looking around nervously.
“Hey Marco. What are you up to?”
He looks around again and quietly says, “I’m about to go home.”
Something tells me this kid shouldn’t be alone right now.
“I’m going to grab a bite to eat and could use the company. Want to join me?” I know I am supposed to be going on a date but I will have to call or text him to cancel. It’s not exactly the first impression I wanted to make, but the look I see in Marco’s eyes tell me he needs me more.
He looks conflicted but after a few moments nods his head. “Ok, yeah sure.”
As we are heading to my car, I notice a couple of guys heading toward us. They don’t look like they belong to the gym and it hits me they might be the guys Caleb mentioned Marco has been associating with. I try to rush us to the vehicle but the faster we walk the faster they walk, and before I can unlock my doors and get us in they make it to my vehicle.
“Yo, Marco. We’ve been looking for you,” scary guy number one says. Marco’s face pales and he looks more scared than any kid should ever look. I pull him behind me and raise my chin praying I don’t pee my pants when I confront these guys. They look scary as hell as they walk closer to us.
“What do you need him for? Isn’t he a bit too young to be hanging out with you?”
“He wasn’t too young to take what doesn’t belong to him,” scary guy two spits out.
I keep Marco behind me. “Well, you shouldn’t be dealing with a child. Do I need to call the police?”
“Lady, this shit ain’t your fucking business. I suggest you worry about yourself,” scary guy number one says getting in my face. He places his hands on my shoulders roughly attempting to shove me out of the way to get to Marco but I plant my feet firmly in the ground refusing to let him get to him.
“Bitch, you need to move out of my way.” He is too strong and I can feel my body beginning to sway against my will. I don’t want him getting to Marco.
I consider yelling for help but suddenly his hands are off me and he is practically flying into the side of my vehicle. When my heart slows down I realize Caleb has scary guy number one up against the side of my car, and scary guy number two doesn’t even try to help. I don’t blame him. Angry Caleb looks downright frightening!
“What the fuck do you think you are doing putting your hands on her? Did she say you could put your hands on her?”
Six
Caleb
To say Christmas was a cluster fuck of epic proportions would be an understatement. The morning started out great. Faith woke up to a million presents under the tree from Santa. Kayla, Bentley, and I watched her rip apart the paper not even caring what was in the boxes. I swear she loved the wrapping paper more than the items inside. Unfortunately, when Kayla asked Bentley to grab her camera it all went downhill and fast. Bentley found a prenuptial agreement she was hiding that her shitty lawyer mom put together and shit hit the fan. He left, then she left, and after a few hours she came back in tears, and spent the rest of Christmas day crying on my shoulder.
This isn’t the first time Kayla has fucked up. She hid her pregnancy from Bentley in the beginning and moved back to Florida to live with her parents. I hate that she did that but I know she was scared and quickly owned up to it. I think the reason Kayla and I became close was because I watched how protective she was of those she loves, especially Bella and Liz. Liz and Kayla are best friends and for years she helped her raise her daughter. I guess I choose to see the good in her. I choose to trust her to an extent, probably more than I trust any woman, but I also don’t have to sleep with her or marry her. I know she has been through a lot of shit and has pretty crappy parents. I don’t like some of the choices she has made but my job is to just be her friend and let her and Bentley figure their shit out.
When I think about how I am able to open up and trust Kayla, and even Liz, it makes me wonder if maybe I could one day open up to a woman who isn’t engaged or married to one of my friends. I think it’s definitely easier to let a woman in that you know doesn’t have a chance of hurting you. Kayla and Liz can’t do anything to me. They can’t use me or cheat on me; I’m not vulnerable to them. I just can’t imagine being in a situation where I ever feel so out of control ever again.
And if Kayla and Bentley’s shit wasn’t enough to fuck up Christmas I got a call from my father’s attorney requesting to speak to me in person. While he is an old friend of my father’s, I don’t know what the fuck he could want from me, and after seven years I can’t imagine there is anything left to say. The fact that my father couldn’t even call me himself and had to have his lawyer call me instead speaks volumes. If he wants to talk, he can call me his damn self.
It’s been three days since Christmas and since Kayla has finally got it together long enough to go to work, I decide I am going to go train for a little bit. After a couple hours of working out Marco shows up. I ask him how his Christmas was and he just shrugs his shoulders. Something is definitely going on with this kid. Yeah, shit has always been rough for him but he never used to let it get him down like this.
I offer to spar with him and show him some new moves and he lights up. While we are working out I notice Hayley observing us. She doesn’t have the look of lust like she used to though, and for some reason once again it’s making
me want her. I’m pretty sure a therapist would have a field day with my fucked-up logic. Her smile is friendlier and less flirty and without thinking about it I smile back at her. She gives me a small wave and I can’t help but watch her as she walks away. I would be blind not to notice how sexy she is. How did I seriously not notice her before?
“Do you like her?” Marco asks taking me away from staring at her perfect ass as she enters her office.
“Huh? Like who?” I ask confused.
He nods towards where Hayley just was and grins.
“We’re just friends,” I say before throwing a punch to his gut to make him block.
“Really? Cause you look like you wanna give her some cooties,” he sings while waggling his eyebrows before busting out laughing. I throw another punch to his stomach and he drops to the ground laughing and singing some stupid song about kissing in a tree, and love, and marriage.
I jump on top of him and start grappling with him. He gets serious and tries to throw me off when his phone rings. He taps out and gets up to go check it.
“Hey, I gotta go,” he says frowning down at his phone.
“Where do you need to be?”
I notice he once again doesn’t make eye contact. “I gotta go help my mom out. I’ll see you tomorrow, ok?”
“Yeah, ok. If you need me you know my number. Right?”
“Yeah, I do,” he says distractedly while gathering up his stuff quickly.
I jump in the shower quickly and head to the parking lot to go home. While checking my texts I see one from Kayla.
Kayla: Bentley and I made up!! We are getting married New Year’s Eve!! You are a groomsman!
As I am texting her back I look up before crossing the street and see Marco and Hayley near her car, only they aren’t alone. The two guys I saw Marco talking to the other day are also there, and one of them appears to have his hands, on Hayley while Marco is hiding behind her.