He lay over me again, raised my arms over my head, and held them there, his face so close he could flick my lips without moving. “I’m going to tell you the biggest secret in the world,” he whispered.
I lay locked inside his gaze, so hypnotized no force in nature could have diverted my attention. If Mama had burst into the room wielding a chainsaw I would have let her carve me up rather than let go of the intense closeness and wild sensations created between us.
He lowered his mouth to my ear. “I drink blood. All the time. I have to. To survive.”
I stiffened and tried to turn my head, but he jerked and growled and firmly held me bound beneath him. He’d changed in an instant and his body hardened into a steel cast all around me. Pain suddenly erupted everywhere his body touched mine.
Warning bells rang out a riot in my mind. I’d seen this sudden change too many times before.
“Don’t move,” he whispered, his tone urgent and deadly serious. “Don’t move.”
I didn’t move, though I couldn’t stop my heart from pounding outside my chest, and I couldn’t catch my breath.
Damon really was ill, and unfortunately, I knew these symptoms. Some pesky little voice in his head was urging him to hurt me, and he might follow those orders, even if he didn’t want to. All he needed was the slightest provocation.
Fear raged wildly in my mind as I searched for a way to stay in control of the situation. He was so much stronger than Mama, and I’d foolishly put myself in the most vulnerable position possible. I could only lie perfectly still and try not to provoke him.
We lay that way for endless minutes, until he shifted slightly and lifted his head to look at me. “I have proof.”
The immediate danger had passed and I relaxed a little. “About what?” I whispered.
His expression was still red and wet and dangerous, but his eyes were soft and pleading. “We’re vampires. I have proof. Believe me, Magic Maggie.”
If I’d learned only one skill from living with Mama it was the ability to find the right shade and tone to play along without sounding condescending. But then, I was only used to Mama, and everyone is different.
“Show me,” I whispered.
He didn’t move, but at least his attitude didn’t change to one more aggressive. The heat from his body was so intense I was almost overwhelmed and had to tilt my head back to breathe.
“I’ll tell you first,” he said. “Relax. It’s gone now. We’re okay. I’m not like my dad. I’d never hurt you.”
I lay still. “Okay. I’m relaxed. You’re too hot.”
He rose off my body a little, enough to let some fresh air flow between us. “There’s a place where they all live,” he said. “In a cave. Granddad wrote it down and I went there. I found them. I saw them. The vampires.”
“What happened? What do they look like?”
“Like us. But not the same inside. They’re not like us. They’re foreign. Their eyes are foreign.”
“Creepy and scary, Damon.”
“I don’t know,” he said, his tone drifting. He rose to his hands and knees and stared at my chin. “I don’t think so. We’re a part of them.” His eyes traveled up my face and stopped at my eyes. “You and me. We have them in our blood.”
The expression in his eyes changed to one of fear and disbelief as he talked himself into a state, and I thought I understood what he was really saying. The mental illness disease, traveling from one person to another in the blood, on and on, had found its way to us. The disease was foreign, not normal, and couldn’t be seen right away from our outward appearances.
I massaged his arms and shoulders beneath the short sleeves of his t-shirt. “We’ll be all right.”
“We have to stick together,” he said. “It’s imperative that we do.”
“We will.”
“That’s what they did. They stayed together.” He turned and slid off the bed. “I’ll show you. I’ll tell you the truth.”
I also stood, debating what to do. A part of me wanted to run for the door, another part wanted to stay and finally allow myself to drift away on the inevitable tide of delusion. A large part of me craved the release. I was so tempted, and so tired of fighting to stay sane.
I could still feel his heat on my skin drawing me to him.
He’d seen my scars and he hadn’t run away. I’d seen his scars and couldn’t honestly say they were uglier than mine. God, I did love him. So much I wanted to jump on his back and force him to take me with him everywhere, every day, for the rest of his life. I wanted to stick myself to his skin like a leach and live off him.
I wanted him to love me in return. And I wanted the love to be real, not desperate.
He searched in his tote bag and brought back a small pink bag with yellow flowers on it. My old makeup bag, which he’d likely found under the sink in the bathroom. His eyes were clear and calm again, so I calmed myself and sat down beside him.
He opened the bag and took out a black velvet pouch. He opened the pouch and spilled an assortment of small, uncut gemstones onto the bedspread. I spread them out and looked them over. Pink, purple, gold, green, blue and red stones rolled against my palm.
“Are these real?”
“Gemstones from the cave,” he said, selecting a green stone the size of a die. “Emerald. The hidden treasure.” He smiled at me and held the stone up toward the sunlight from the windows. “I’ll have it cut for you. To match your eyes.”
I took the stone and looked at it more closely. Through the roughness of the outer stone, I could see a line of shining green. I smiled at him. “I’ve never had any real jewelry.”
He leaned in to give me a kiss on the forehead. “You will.”
“Where did you find these?”
“Granddad had them in a drawer. I used to play with them when I was a kid.”
“Damon, Corky owned a jewelry store. Do you think maybe you took the stones from his house?”
He took a deep breath, staring off, and blew out the breath, puffing out his cheeks. “Yeah. I probably did. I’m not sure. I do remember playing with them as a kid.”
I decided it didn’t matter. Both Corky and Elliot were gone and Damon couldn’t help himself.
He handed me a black and white photograph from the makeup bag. It was old, ragged at the edges. “This is them. Look.”
I took the photo, but had to turn on the bedside lamp to see. There they were. My grandmother, Grampa Harvey, Chester, Bella, Verna Jarvis, Corky and Elliot, as children. They stood in front of a white building, probably a small church or school, dressed in what were probably their good clothes. They were all about nine or ten years old, except for Gram, who look a year or two younger. I’d never seen pictures of them as children, not even my grandparents, and it seemed odd to recognize their faces in such young children. But I could see them. Each of them in those little faces.
“Wow.” Tears came to my eyes. “They were always together. Such good friends.” I’d had friends over the years, though only Jaynie still spoke to me. The rest had given up on me as soon as we’d graduated high school. I’d always wanted to be a part of something special like this. A group. A real family of friends to subsidize my chaotic natural family. A place where I truly belonged.
I turned the picture over. Pine Hollow. KY 1948.
“Where is Pine Hollow?”
“Just over the state line.”
“You’ve been there?”
He nodded and took the photograph. “I found the cave. We’ll go there tomorrow.”
I stood up as I suddenly remembered. “I have to call Chester. He’ll be worried when I don’t show up in the morning. He’ll have the police out looking for me.”
Damon grabbed my hand. “They know where you are.”
“They probably do, but I need to call and… explain.” I let out a breath of dread. “Chester’s gonna be so mad at me.”
“Don’t tell them about Pine Hollow.”
“Why not? I want to see where Gram lived. I
want to know more about their life there. I always thought they were from here in Knoxville.”
He pulled on my hand and I sat down, wary of upsetting him again. “I called Chester,” he said. “I talked to him. I told him we had to come here for your mother and he said it was okay.”
I didn’t want to accuse him of lying, but I didn’t think Chester would agree to this trip. Especially without hearing from me personally. “He said it was okay? Just like that?”
“We have to cut ties with the vampires,” Damon said. “Until we know the truth. They’re ruthless.”
“But I thought we were vampires, too.” I shook my head. We’d already had this conversation. I didn’t know Damon well enough to guess what was going on in his head.
“Maggie, baby,” he said, taking on that condescending tone again, “they didn’t want us to know. They’ve let us all suffer for fifty years. They stood by and watched your mother and my father go insane. They see it happening to us and they do nothing. How can they be on our side? Tell me that?”
I tried to think, but I was getting confused. On the one hand, I did believe a secret had been kept by the old people. On the other hand, I didn’t believe we were vampires. Chester and Bella had been like second grandparents to me my whole life. But, at the same time, after Gram had died, they’d abandoned Mama. They never came over to the house to check on her. Only Verna Jarvis had stuck around after Gram was gone. Chester did, however, give me a job, and he and Bella had watched out for me over the years. I knew they cared about me.
I looked again at the stones on the bed. “What do these prove?”
Damon raised a questioning eyebrow.
“You said you had proof,” I reminded him. “That we were vampires.”
He nodded seriously and handed me yet another picture. In this one, the old folks were older, maybe in their thirties or forties, standing in a room with paneled walls. This one was a color photo. They all wore long black robes with hoods, looking scary and strange. In front of them, on a table covered with a red cloth, sat a flaming candle and a silver bowl full of red liquid.
The back of the picture was blank.
Aside from the usual six, others stood with them, all dressed in the creepy black robes. Their faces were painted white and their eyes were rimmed heavily in black. The only one I recognized was Grampa Harvey.
“That’s my grandmother,” Damon said, pointing. “I don’t know who that woman is. Corky’s wife, maybe.”
I nodded. “I never knew her. She died a long time ago.”
“There’s more.” He handed me another letter. I didn’t recognize the handwriting but at this point, I didn’t care. “The offspring survived and thus far has shown no signs of confusion or illness. We won’t know the true result for years to come.”
He folded the sheet of paper and replaced it in the makeup bag. “It’s from a page in my granddad’s journal. Now do you believe me?”
“I don’t like this,” I said aloud. “I hate this. I really, really do.”
I had to get up and walk around, and look out the window at the eternal river flowing below. I was alarmed now, no doubt. My grammy had been up to something. Something weird and creepy. She’d been a member of some sort of bizarre cult. I realized I’d never known her at all.
“Do you believe me now?” Damon asked again. He moved up close behind me and rested his cheek against my head. “We’re in danger.”
“I just… can’t believe any of this.”
He wrapped his arms around my waist. “They like it that your mother is crazy. They want us to go crazy, too. That way we can’t learn the truth. That’s why they keep you close. To keep an eye on you. At the first sign we know the truth, they’ll kill us.”
Everything he said made sense to me. Now that I had more evidence. “We have to go to Pine Hollow. I have to know.”
He tightened his grip on me, breathing heavily in my ear. “Thank you. I knew you’d love me. Once you knew who we are.”
Turning around, I looked into his deranged, hopeful eyes, and a moment of clarity came over me. I loved him and he loved me and we were meant to be together. Happiness, no matter how temporary, was within my reach and all I had to do was grab hold of it.
“Damon,” I said and took his hand, “come sit down with me.”
He came easily, to the table with two chairs, but kept a suspicious eye on me as we sat down, facing each other.
“Will you tell me the truth about something?”
“Maybe,” he said, narrowing his eyes.
“Tell me why you were in that ‘place.’ I promise I won’t hold it against you. I’d really like to know.”
He shook his head slightly. “I needed it to survive. To hold on as long as possible. It helps me stay sane.”
“Then you can tell me. If it helps you stay sane then I need to know. I need to know everything.”
He sat back, sitting turned in his seat, and crossed his arms. “I stole something. Something normal people don’t steal.”
“The hand skeleton? Or the hand before it was a skeleton?”
“No. You’ll look at me differently.”
“I won’t, I promise. If we’re going to stay together I need to know. We’re the same. We come from the same place. You can trust me. We’re like family.”
He pressed his lips into a straight line and stared off as if he could barely find the self-restraint not to jump out the window.
Then he shrugged and met my eyes. “Fine, let’s test this. I stole some blood.”
My breath caught in my throat. I shouldn’t have been surprised. He’d already confessed to drinking blood. Still, I was surprised. “How?”
“There was this blood mobile…. They caught me, fucking red dripping down my chin. I was young and careless and I got caught. I went straight to the psych ward.”
“Okay,” I said with a nod. “Thanks.”
He frowned harshly. “That’s all?”
“Well… not all. Scoot around.” Every nerve in my body vibrated, but I felt extraordinarily calm and focused. Damon was different. I knew that without any doubts now. But I was different, too. I moved my chair around to meet him, then I leaned in close and whispered in his ear. “I’ve drunk blood before. Lots of times.”
He caught my head and wouldn’t let me sit back. His arm closed around me, and then I was sitting on his lap. “Tell me about it.”
We sat hugging so those watching us from a distance would never guess we were having a dark and depraved conversation. “My mother taught me when I was young. She said it would give me magic powers. From the first time, I’ve craved it. But I don’t let myself do it much anymore.”
“Yes!” he hissed. “It’s a craving. A need.” He squeezed me so tight it hurt. “Let me taste you. I’ll be careful.”
“No.” I pushed myself back. “I don’t want to be like that, Damon. I have to stay focused on reality because of Mama. I’m all she has. And I do not want to be like her. I’m really scared. Let’s just pretend like we’re normal.”
“Just a little pin prick,” he said, his blue eyes swimming with fantasies. “It won’t hurt. I need to taste you so bad I’m in constant pain. Constant, Maggie…. Blood keeps us sane.”
“Damon, no,” I moaned. Because Lord help me, I craved to taste him, and everything I’d admitted was true.
Every time I lifted a pound of hamburger out of the bowl, and saw the watery red pooling in the bottom, I had to force myself to pour it down the drain. And how I wanted to taste Damon, my partner in dementia, my soul mate in insanity. His blood would be real, warm and thick and delicious….
I could taste him right now, in my watering mouth.
“We’re vampires,” he said with a deep voice, holding my gaze. “They told me to deny it, in the hospital, but I never did. I know what I am. And now I’ve found you, my sweet lover. We won’t die alone.”
Somehow, he knew my greatest fear. Of being committed, of dying alone. “I do love you,” I said, closing
my arms around his neck. “We were meant to be together. You’re the one.”
He pulled on my hair, exposing my neck and dove in, aggressively sucking and biting, barely refraining from breaking the skin. The pain sent white-hot shards of pleasure straight to my center.
I wanted to give him what he wanted. And I wanted to take what he offered. But I needed to know one thing. I needed to know beyond any doubts.
“Tell me we’re not cousins. Tell me we’re not related.”
He leaned back and frowned at me. “We’re not related. We’re the children of vampires. Chester and Bella never had children. Verna Jarvis never had children. We only seem the same because we’re the only children of vampire children. Your mother and my father were the only children born.”
“What about Aunt Cynthia? What about Corky’s children?”
“They’re like us. They hide it. Or… they’re immune.”
“So, we’re not cousins?”
“No,” he said with conviction, frowning wildly. “My granddad loved my grandmother. Theirs was a true love. He told me once that a cheater is the same as a criminal. To betray the one you love is the same as murder. The murder of love. The murder of trust. And love and trust is more important than human life. There’s no greater crime. He’d never have cheated on my grandmother. He wore his wedding ring to the grave. We’ll take tests if you want to prove it. Whatever you want.”
I only wanted answers and a meaning to my meaningless life. I wanted security. No matter what.
No matter what.
So I didn’t resist in the slightest when he carried me to the bed and began undressing me. For the first time in my life, I could truly imagine a future with someone. Damon and I might actually have a happy life – until our kids had us committed.
Damon Page 10