by Pam Weaver
She watched him walk away, his arm lifting in a small wave, before she went inside and climbed the stairs to her bedsit. The house was quiet as Pearl flopped onto the side of the bed, eyes looking up to the ceiling. Mr Bardington had stopped his pacing and she rarely saw the man. In fact, he had become so quiet that she often forgot he was in the building. Like her, he was an outsider. Still, now that she was courting Derek, the locals were coming round and warming to her.
Pearl kicked off her shoes and went to make herself a drink, but soon after drinking it, she heard noises from the street, people shouting. Puzzled, she went over to the window to see a crowd of about twenty people. In the dim light from a street-lamp she spotted Derek amongst them and threw up the window.
‘Derek. What’s going on?’
He looked up. ‘Come down, Pearl.’
She threw on her shoes and dashed downstairs, Derek coming straight to her side. ‘I was on my way home when I met up with this lot. Eric’s missing. Have you seen him?’
‘No. Oh, Derek, it’s after ten o’clock. Where can he be?’
‘I dunno. He didn’t come home from school and, as you can see, a lot of people have rallied round to search for him. They’ve looked everywhere but are running out of options.’
‘Have they tried Battersea Park?’
‘I dunno, but we couldn’t cover an area of that size. What makes you think he’d go there?’
‘There’s a lot to attract kids, but it was just a suggestion. Anyway, if the police have been told, they’ll probably cover it.’
‘Yeah, they’ve been told, but not until after eight o’clock. Frank was hoping he’d turn up before then.’
Pearl saw Frank Hanwell, his face drawn with worry. ‘Eric! Eric!’ he shouted, his eyes frantically searching the dim High Street. ‘Where are you, you little bugger?’
‘Frank looks awful. Is there anything I can do to help?’
‘You can join us on the search. Apparently he’s not at any of his friends’ houses, and to be honest, I don’t know where we’re trying next.’
Pearl walked with Derek to Frank’s side, the man’s eyes wild as he looked at them. ‘I can’t understand it, Derek. He’s never done this before.’
‘Don’t worry, Frank. The police are sure to find him, even if we don’t. Pearl has suggested Battersea Park and she could be right.’
‘Eric wouldn’t go to the park on his own. Lucy would kill him and he knows that.’
‘He’s just a kid. Think about what you got up to as a nipper.’
Frank’s shoulders slumped. ‘All right, we’ll try there.’
It was after one in the morning before they gave up, footsore and weary as they trudged home.
Derek once again walked Pearl to her door, and after giving her a swift hug he said, ‘Try to get some sleep, love. The police are still looking, and maybe there’ll be good news in the morning.’
Pearl was so tired that she could barely respond. ‘Oh, I hope so, Derek.’
They said good night, Pearl almost staggering up to her room, but despite her exhaustion it was some time before she was able to sleep. The police would find Eric – they just had to. Behind closed eyes, tears gathered as she pictured the boy’s beautiful face.
Nearly a week passed and there was still no sign of Eric. Frank’s stall stood empty, the man incapable of running it and, trying to rally round as much as possible, the other costermongers set it up for him, working it between them to make sure the man had an income.
Frank’s wife, Lucy, hadn’t been seen, and rumour had it that she was in a terrible state. Eric was their only child, the love of their lives, and amongst the gossip in the café there was a lot of sympathy for the couple.
Gertie was also badly affected. She lived next door to the Hanwells and knew them well. Though she still washed the dishes, her tears were often seen dripping into the washing-up water, her bright smile gone.
When Pearl finished work on Wednesday she stopped off at Derek’s stall. ‘There’s still no news,’ she said sadly.
‘I know, love, and I feel so helpless. It’s been six days since Eric went missing and police seem to have exhausted all their enquiries. Now everyone’s back is up about the way they’re treating the Hanwells.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘They keep questioning them, and have talked to the neighbours. They’ve asked what sort of parents they are, if there were any signs of mistreatment, and have spoken to the teachers at Eric’s school. Pearl, surely they don’t think that Frank and Lucy had anything to do with his disappearance?’
Pearl placed her hand on his arm. ‘I’ve only lived around here a short time, but I’ve seen Frank with Eric and it’s obvious how much he loves his son.’
‘Yeah, and as far as I’m concerned the police are barking up the wrong tree.’
‘Oh, Derek, where can Eric be?’
‘I dunno, love, but I hope to God some nonce ain’t got hold of him.’
‘A nonce. I don’t understand.’
‘Christ, I keep forgetting what an innocent you are. It’s another word for a paedophile.’
Pearl shook her head. ‘I still don’t understand.’
‘They’re sick bastards who like sex with children.’
‘No!’ she cried, but then something she remembered from the orphanage fell into place. When she’d been about ten, a girl of the same age had been fostered out, but after only a month she came back, a sad, pale shadow of the pretty girl who had left. She hardly spoke and lay curled on her bed for hours, but whispers went around the dormitory. The older girls said she’d been interfered with by the foster parent, a man who liked children. Pearl hadn’t understood, but now it all made sense. ‘Oh, Derek, that’s terrible.’
‘Look, don’t get upset. I’m probably wrong.’
‘Oh, I hope so.’
A customer came to the stall, and with a small, sad smile, Derek said to Pearl, ‘I’ll see you later, love.’
Pearl walked away with a sick feeling in her stomach. With her head down she didn’t see Kevin until she walked into him. ‘Oh, sorry,’ she blurted.
His hands gripped her arms. ‘What do you expect when you walk around looking at the pavement?’
‘Yes, sorry, I’m afraid I was thinking about Eric Hanwell.’
‘Everyone is talking about his disappearance. I wonder what happened to the poor little tyke.’
‘I don’t know. I just wish the police would find him.’
‘Yeah, but he’ll probably turn up dead.’
The colour drained from Pearl’s face. ‘Oh, don’t say that!’
‘Look, he ain’t the sort of kid that would run away, so what other option is there?’
‘Derek said that a nonce might have got hold of him.’
‘If that’s the case, the poor little sod would be better off dead.’
Pearl found herself gawking at Kevin, and then with a small sob she ran to her bedsit. Eric was such a beautiful boy with the face of an angel. Surely nobody would harm him?
As Pearl got ready to go round to Derek’s that evening, she suddenly paused as a noise came from upstairs. Unused to hearing anything these days from Mr Bardington, her ears pricked. What was that faint sound she had heard? Was it a cry? Was the man ill?
She stood absolutely still, but there were no further sounds and, relaxing again, she continued to dress. It seemed strange to see so little of someone who lived on the same premises – in fact she saw more of his mail. Pearl never received any letters, but there were often large brown envelopes delivered for Mr Bardington. If Pearl saw them she would pick them up and place them on the bottom stair, and they always disappeared. If it wasn’t for that she wouldn’t know the man lived there.
Ready now, she picked up her handbag and was soon on her way to Derek’s. She had become very fond of Connie’s cooking, and with the extra meals she was having Pearl was putting on weight. Her few outfits were getting tight, but thankfully Mo had told her about a shop that
sold second-hand clothes. Paint, brushes and paper were always top of Pearl’s wish list, but realising there was no choice but to buy new clothes, she decided to take a look at the shop the next day.
The evening soon passed, and after a huge dinner of steak-and-kidney pudding, they sat playing cards.
Derek suddenly smiled across at Connie. ‘I’ve got a nice surprise for you.’
‘Have you now. And what’s that?’
‘I’m going to buy a television.’
‘And where is the money coming from?’
‘Don’t worry, Gran, it ain’t new, but it’s in good working order.’
‘A television. My, ain’t we coming up in the world, Pearl?’
‘We certainly are,’ Pearl agreed, loving being included as part of the family.
‘That’ll be one in the eye for her next door. She’s always bragging about her television. If I hear one more word about some geezer called Dixon of Dock Green, I think I’ll go mad.’
‘Who’s he?’ Derek asked.
‘Oh, it’s some sort of programme about a copper. Someone called Jack Warner plays him, and her next door is mad about it.’
‘Well, Gran, now you’ll be able to watch it too.’
‘Yeah, I will, won’t I?’ she said, smiling widely.
‘I’d best be off,’ Pearl said as the game of rummy came to an end, Connie winning as usual. Pearl leaned down to kiss the old lady on the cheek. ‘I think you cheat.’
With a look of indignation she said, ‘No I don’t, you cheeky mare.’ Connie then smiled, patting Pearl’s arm. ‘Go on, get yourself home and we’ll see you tomorrow.’
Derek walked her to the High Street as usual. As they stopped outside Pearl’s street door, he took her into his arms, neither seeing Kevin Dolby watching them from a doorway on the other side of the road, a scowl on his face.
Kevin waited until the coast was clear before he moved. He’d been looking out for Nobby Clark, but there was no sign of him. Money was really tight and he was growing frustrated, so much so that despite the last cock-up, he was ready to do another job.
Once again he scowled. That Derek was a jammy git. Pearl had blossomed lately, her figure filling out, but it was Derek who tasted the goods. Blimey, what was wrong with the girl? How could she fancy that ugly bugger?
He looked up at her window and, seeing the light go on, he crossed the road. Without money in his pocket there was no chance of a trip to Soho. Maybe it was time to give Pearl Button a try.
Kevin looked up and down the High Street. Seeing nobody about, he rang her bell, a smile plastered on his face when she opened the door. ‘Hello, Pearl. I was just wondering if you’ve seen Nobby Clark.’
‘Er … no.’
‘I was supposed to meet him here at the shop,’ Kevin lied, ‘but so far he ain’t turned up. Do you mind if I come in and wait?’
‘But it’s after ten o’clock. Why would you be meeting him at this time of night?’
‘Now then, Pearl, you know better than to ask questions. Come on, girl, let me in,’ Kevin insisted as he pushed his way past her.
Pearl’s eyes were rounded as she stared at him, but Kevin made for the stairs. ‘Your room is on the first floor, ain’t it?’
He didn’t wait for her answer, or look over his shoulder, convinced that she would follow him.
Kevin wasn’t wrong, and as he walked into her room his face stretched with surprise as he looked around the walls. ‘Well, well, did you draw these?’
‘Yes,’ Pearl said, her face reddening.
‘They’re good – in fact, very good. It seems you’ve got hidden talents.’
‘Thank you,’ she said, obviously pleased.
Kevin hid a smile. So, the way to this girl was through her sketches. He made the most of it. ‘That’s a brilliant one of my mother. You could sell these, Pearl.’
‘Sell them? Oh, no, I don’t think they’re good enough.’
‘Leave it out, of course they are. Blimey, look at that one of Derek. It’s as good as a photograph.’ Kevin sat on the edge of her bed. ‘Have you got any more?’
‘Yes, but you won’t want to see them.’
‘Why not? I’ve got nothing else to do until Nobby shows up.’
Pearl picked up a large folder and without thinking about what she was doing, sat beside him on the bed. ‘Here’s one of Gertie.’
‘Blimey, that’s marvellous,’ and careful not to touch her, he looked at all the drawings in her portfolio. ‘Has anyone else seen these?’
‘No, you’re the first.’
‘Well, love, I feel privileged, but I don’t see one of me.’
‘I … I haven’t got one.’
As she turned, their eyes met, and as though Pearl suddenly realised their close proximity she became agitated, quickly stuffing the drawings back into the folder. He gently touched her arm, saying softly, ‘Any chance of a drink?’
‘I … I’ve only got tea or lemonade.’
‘Lemonade will do me.’
He watched her as she went to the small kitchenette. She was such a meek little thing and he didn’t want to frighten her off, but Christ, he was as hard as a rock and couldn’t wait much longer. When she returned he took the glass, his smile teasing.
‘I still think that drawing of Derek is good, but I don’t know what you see in him.’
‘Derek is lovely, kind and caring.’
‘I could be kind and caring too.’
She flushed and Kevin loved it. God, what an innocent, the daft cow like putty in his hands. She fancied him, there was no doubt about that. Placing the glass on the floor, he made his move. Taking her hand, he pulled her down beside him on the bed, enfolding her in his arms.
‘Pearl,’ he whispered, one of his hands brushing her breast.
‘No, stop it!’ she protested, pulling away.
‘Come on, Pearl, you know you like me. I only want a little cuddle, and there’s no harm in that.’
‘I … I’m going out with Derek and it wouldn’t be right.’
For a moment Kevin wanted to slap her, but resisted, instead planting a sad expression on his face. ‘Yeah, sorry, but I’ve fancied you for ages.’
‘Fancy me! You … you fancy me?’
‘Of course I do. Look, I’ll come clean. I’m not really waiting for Nobby. I came round here to see you.’
Pearl’s eyes were wide. ‘But … but Derek …’
‘Don’t worry about him.’ And on those words Kevin pulled her into his arms again. For a moment she stiffened, but then he raised her chin with one finger, his lips meeting hers. She groaned, and he smiled. He kisses grew deeper, his hands wandering over her body, touching her in places that he knew she’d love.
‘No, don’t,’ she protested as he began to unbutton her blouse.
He stopped, whispering, ‘Sorry,’ as he released her.
Pearl clutched her blouse together, gasping, her eyes dark with desire as they met his. As he hoped, she made the move this time, leaning into his arms. He struggled to take his time, almost bursting, but at last he could sense that she was ready. Once again she resisted a little as he began to remove her clothes, but as he gently coaxed, she suddenly melted.
Unable to wait any longer, he pushed Pearl onto her back, and as he entered her she cried out, stiffening beneath him. There was some resistance, but unsurprised to find Pearl a virgin, her cries of pain heightened his passion. He was the first!
Kevin took Pearl quickly, ignoring her pain. She was innocent, acquiescent, and he felt like a man, conquering, dominant and in control. Of course, there was an element missing, one that he had to pay for in Soho, but it was still good and for a while he was able to lose himself in her body.
All too soon it was over and, annoyed that he hadn’t lasted longer, Kevin rolled away to light a cigarette, ignoring Pearl’s sniffles until she spoke.
‘You … you shouldn’t have done that, and … and it hurt.’
‘You didn’t put up much of a fight,
and anyway, it always hurts the first time,’ he said dismissively, thinking that at least that’s what he’d heard.
When he had finished his cigarette, he turned to look at Pearl again. She looked vulnerable, innocent, her huge eyes tear-filled as they met his. ‘I’m sorry I hurt you, but it’ll be better next time. Come on, give me a cuddle.’
She shook her head, but he settled himself beside her, wrapping her in his arms. For a moment she stiffened, but when he didn’t do anything other than hold her, she relaxed, snuggling against him. They lay like that for a while, but then reliving the moment that confirmed to him that Pearl was a virgin, Kevin found himself hardening again.
Slowly and gently he began to stroke her. She resisted a little, but then became compliant. Kevin smiled. He’d let her enjoy it this time, but in future he’d teach her a trick or two, show her what he liked. He entered her, moving slowly, teasingly. She groaned, this time with pleasure.
‘Well, you certainly enjoyed it that time,’ he leered when it was over.
Pearl lay quietly for a moment but then threw her arms around him. ‘Oh, Kevin, I didn’t realise love could be like this.’
‘Love! It ain’t love, you daft cow. It was just sex, and don’t go reading anything else into it. I ain’t looking for a steady girlfriend.’
Pearl’s eyes were rounded with shock as she stared at him. ‘But—’
Kevin rose to his feet. ‘No buts, Pearl. As I said, it was nothing, and by the way, there’s no need for Derek to find out.’ With a dismissive wave of his hand he added, ‘See ya,’ before walking out.
Chapter Fourteen
When Kevin left, Pearl was in tears, going over and over what had happened. He was so handsome, so kind about her sketches, and she’d been flattered by his attention. When he started to fondle her she found her body reacting in ways she’d never felt before. His hands had been gentle, touching her, arousing delicious feelings, and though she had protested at first, in truth she didn’t want him to stop. Despite the initial pain she had never felt so close to anyone before, their bodies fused, as one, and she found herself reaching out for something, a longing. Was this it? Was this how it felt to be loved and in love?