by Pam Weaver
‘That’s just what she thought you’d say, but she’s more than capable, as you know. She’s helped out more than enough times, and your ladies always love her.’
‘She’s common.’
‘So am I.’ Ruby snapped back.
Leonora shrugged back down under the blanket and glared ferociously but Ruby knew it was because she was feeling frustrated at having to hand over the reins of her beloved hotel to someone else, even if it was Ruby, who had worked hard alongside her for five years, and Gracie, who was more than proving her worth in being a general dogsbody in her spare time.
Ruby made the tea, set it out on a tray and put it on the side table beside her aunt’s chair.
‘Shall I pour for both of us? Gracie can manage, you know, and I said I’d be an hour so she’s not expecting me.’
Without waiting for an answer Ruby sat on the chair next to the other side of the table and stirred the teapot.
‘I’d really like you to come to Melton with me. It’s going to be so hard and it would help if you were there. You understand the situation so well.’
‘I’ll see how I am. I know it’s just a chill but it’s wearing me out. I feel so useless.’
Leonora’s tone had Ruby wondering if she was actually trying to convince herself that she just under the weather rather than really sick.
Suddenly Ruby wanted to go to Melton and she wanted to drag the recalcitrant Leonora along with her so that George could give her a check-up.
‘How is she?’ Gracie asked when Ruby went back down.
‘I’m not sure. I want to talk to you about Maggie’s birthday. If I can persuade Aunt Leonora to come with me, would you take over here for the whole day? A long day?’
‘I can ask for the day off, but would you really trust me here for a day? And more importantly, would Lady Leonora?’
‘She’ll fret, but she frets when it’s me.’
They both laughed. Gracie was nearly as fond of Leonora as Ruby was.
‘And as for fretting, when are you seeing Tony again?’ Gracie asked. ‘He’s been fretting a bit himself since Fanny-Ann upstairs has been out of action and you’ve been too busy for him.’
‘He’s not happy that I’m so busy but that’s just too bad.’
‘Well, you know what I think about him, but the feeling’s mutual so I don’t care.’ Gracie’s tone was matter-of-fact.
‘You do seem to rub each other up the wrong way all the time.’
‘Hmm. So how do you really feel about him? How far is it going to go? All the way down the aisle?’ Gracie turned the corners of her mouth down and pretended to shudder.
‘Don’t be mean,’ Ruby laughed. ‘I like going out with him, but that’s it at the moment. I don’t want to be married. I’ve said before, just me and a Pekingese in my old age.’
‘You’ll change your mind, I know you will, but I hope it’s not that arrogant twit you decide on. A smelly snuffly Pekingese would be much nicer.’
‘Meanie. Anyway, I’m off to do things that need doing.’
They smiled at each other before going off in different directions to work, Gracie to the kitchen and Ruby to the office and reception.
Tony Alfredo was the only bone of contention between Ruby and Gracie. He was the man Ruby was going out with him, but Gracie didn’t like or trust him, and she made no bones about it.
Ruby had become friends with Tony Alfredo very slowly, starting five years before with just the occasional outing during his university holidays when he was visiting his family. As an occasional companion the charming young law student had been perfect, but then he’d returned to the family home to live with his parents and started working in London, commuting by train every day, and he expected to see her far more often. He had become more demanding, and although Ruby still liked his company she was uncomfortable with his intensity.
He hated her going out and about, especially with Gracie and her friends from the Palace Hotel, yet he would never go out with them, despite Ruby asking him. They had fun when they were together and he took her to places she wouldn’t normally go, but he was too demanding when Ruby couldn’t spend time with him. Despite her constantly trying to find the middle road, Tony just wanted more, and he would push and push until she gave in. She knew she had to sit down and have a talk with him, but she knew it would be hard, and at that moment she wasn’t in the right frame of mind.
As Ruby helped Leonora out of the car a whirlwind that was a child ran out of the house and then stopped dead beside the car door, looking expectant.
‘Hello Maggie! Many happy returns of the day to you. Are you having a lovely birthday so far?’ Ruby managed a wide smile, despite feeling her stomach lurch right up into her throat. It was such a physical feeling Ruby was grateful that she could busy herself helping Leonora out of the car and not have to make any prolonged eye contact with the child immediately. She needed some time to acclimatise herself both to seeing Maggie, who had grown so much, and to being back in Melton, the village she loved.
It was the same every time she went back: she felt physically sick with expectation, unsure of how it was going to be.
Leonora had started to feel better in the days before Maggie’s birthday so it had been easier to persuade her to go to the party and leave a very scared Gracie in charge of the hotel. But as they got closer to Melton so Ruby’s nerves had started to take over and when she turned onto the village High Street all she wanted was to do a U-turn and head straight back to Essex.
But of course she didn’t. She carried on following the familiar route to the house.
‘I’m having a birthday party. Four of my friends are coming and Mummy’s made jelly and cake for everyone. You can have some as well.’
‘I can’t wait! And you look so pretty in your party frock. Shall we all go inside and see Mummy and Daddy?’ She looked at the little girl. Her daughter. ‘Say hello to Aunty Leonora. She wanted to see you on your birthday as well.’
‘Hello, Aunty Leonora.’ As the child held out her hand and smiled, all Ruby could see was Johnnie Riordan. There was little in her features or colouring to connect her to Ruby, but there was no denying her paternity. The child’s hair was blonde and straight, and tied back from her face with a bright red ribbon that perfectly matched the colour of both her T-bar shoes and the edging of her white cotton frock, which Ruby just knew was home-made by Babs. She wanted to cry as she looked at the perfect little girl standing in front of her, but before she could shed a tear Babs came out. Ruby knew she’d stood back for a few minutes to let her say hello to Maggie, and she was grateful for her thoughtfulness and perfect timing under the circumstances.
She walked forward and greeted her sister-in-law politely first, before hugging Ruby affectionately. ‘Oh, I’m so pleased to see you, both of you. I thought we’d have a slow light lunch to get our strength up before the other little girls arrive and the party starts. The children will be excluded from the sitting room so Leonora and George can spend some time together.’ Babs lightly squeezed Ruby’s hand to acknowledge that she’d listened to Ruby’s request for George to check his sister over.
‘Ruby, do you want to come and see my new pram? I’ve put my dolly in it already.’
‘I’d love to, and I’ve got a birthday present for you as well, and,’ she paused and looked down at Maggie, ‘so has Aunty Leonora. But you have to go indoors first. Go on, no peeking. Off you go.’
The little girl laughed and ran off into the house, followed by Leonora, leaving Ruby alone with Babs to get the presents out of the car boot.
‘How are you getting on?’ Babs asked. ‘I’ve missed you so much, and I still worry about you.’
‘I know.’ was all Ruby could think of to say. Melton was no longer her world and Maggie was no longer her daughter; the whole situation felt wrong. As they walked together to the house Ruby saw Derek Yardley leaning against the Wheatons’ car, watching her; as she caught his eye so he smiled, or rather his mouth made the shape of a smi
le, but he didn’t say anything, he simply stared until she looked away.
‘I don’t think Yardley knows what to say to you. You’ve turned from a gawky little schoolgirl into a beautiful young woman. He was always very fond of you …’
‘Hmm.’ Ruby’s murmur was noncommittal as she looked away from him and walked faster towards the open back door of the house. ‘You did tell Yardley I was just giving Aunt Leonora a lift, didn’t you? I don’t want him to know where I live or what I do.’
Babs looked puzzled. ‘We’ve never said anything. It’s nothing to do with him, but it’s been so long anyway, he’d never put two and two together now. No one would.’
Derek Yardley had been the Wheatons’ driver for so many years they thought of him as part of the family. Ruby had no intention of saying anything against him, especially as she didn’t live there any more and didn’t have to have anything to do with him, but she disliked him intensely and was ever uncomfortable around him. But because George and Babs depended on him so much she kept quiet.
‘OK Maggie, let’s go and look at your new doll’s pram,’ Ruby said. ‘And you’ve got more presents to open …’
Ruby watched Maggie and was fascinated at the self-assurance of the little girl. She was gorgeous and confident, and Ruby found herself thinking to the future, seeing her daughter growing up to go to university, qualifying as a doctor to take over from George and keep the family surgery going in the village. Because of circumstances and finances, Ruby’s parents had never had any aspirations for her and it thrilled her that Maggie would have everything going for her. There would be no limits for Maggie Wheaton.
Everyone watched indulgently as Maggie opened her gift from Ruby and whooped with excitement at the beautifully dressed baby doll. She placed it straight into the pram and wheeled it around the room.
‘She loves it,’ Babs smiled. ‘Look at her, such a wonderful choice.’
Then she opened her gift from Leonora, which was a compendium of games. Ruby had known what the birthday present was – she’d even bought it from the toyshop on Leonora’s behalf – but with everything that was going on she hadn’t given it too much thought.
‘Oh, look, Maggie, all those games,’ Babs said. ‘It’s got your favourite game in the box. Draughts …’
Draughts. The word hit Ruby like a bullet between the eyes. Nausea rose and she breathed deeply. In and out, in and out.
‘Who do you play draughts with?’ Ruby asked Maggie, trying to keep her tone moderate.
‘I always play with Mummy and Daddy.’
‘Do you play with anyone apart from Mummy and Daddy?’
‘No, but I might play with my friends now I’ve got a big box. Look, Mummy, Snakes and Ladders. Will you teach me?’
As her face became hotter so Ruby could actually feel her heart palpitating erratically in her chest. Suddenly the old wound, which had seemed long since healed, was ripped open again.
Sixteen
1942
‘What are you up to, young Ruby?’ Derek Yardley asked the twelve-year-old, who was kicking a tennis ball at the edge of the path in boredom. Babs Wheaton was helping her husband in the surgery, Marian and Keith had gone home for their tea, and Ruby was on her own with nothing to do.
‘I’m waiting for Aunty Babs.’
‘I don’t want that ball hitting the car I’ve just cleaned. Do you want to come up to my flat and wait for her? It’s just about to rain. We could listen to the wireless or play a game of draughts.’ He walked over to where she was playing and smiled as he patted her gently on her back.
‘I’m all right here. It’s nearly teatime.’
‘I’ll leave the windows open and then you’ll hear Mrs Wheaton call you.’
‘OK,’ Ruby said without any more hesitation. Yardley, as he was called by everyone, was almost family and she had known him as long as she’d known Aunty Babs and Uncle George.
Derek Yardley was a compact and wiry man in his early thirties, with a neat moustache and short hair. He was softly spoken to the point of mumbling, and he rarely made eye contact with anyone. Country born and bred, he had a very narrow outlook, was not very sociable and didn’t stand out on any level. He’d not had to serve in the Forces because of health problems, and he had no family so he was the perfect live-in driver for George, with his own disability. He did everything for the doctor that he couldn’t do himself: he helped him in and out of the car, lifted his wheelchair and helped him on his rounds. He looked after the car impeccably and did some odd jobs. He was indispensable to both George and Babs, and they acknowledged it by treating him well.
Ruby followed him up the outside stairs at the rear of the garage and in through the door at the top. It had previously been the hayloft, but the Wheatons had converted it into a compact flat that was just big enough for one person. A heavy curtain attached to the ceiling separated the living area from the bedroom. There was a washbasin in the corner and an outside toilet behind the garage, but no cooking facilities, so Yardley ate the same meals as the family although he never ate with them. He simply collected his plate and returned it after he’d eaten. If it was a day when the elderly housekeeper was there then he’d have a cup of tea and a slice of cake with her in the kitchen, but other than that he led a separate, isolated life.
‘Here, Ruby, you sit on the sofa and I’ll get the draughts out.’
Ruby had never been in his flat before. She had automatically sat down at the drop-leaf table by the window, but she did as she was told and moved to the sofa, watching as Yardley set the game up on a rickety side table that he’d pulled forward. He then sat beside her on the small lumpy sofa, which was against the wall on the far side away from the window.
‘There you are. What do you want to be, black or white?’ he asked.
‘I always choose white when I play with Aunty Babs.’
‘White it is for you, then. You go first.’
The man and the child had been playing the board game and laughing for a few minutes when Derek Yardley made his move. First he slid one hand along the back of the sofa and then moved it onto her shoulder. It was surreptitious and although Ruby sensed something not quite right it wasn’t enough for her to say anything, but she was distracted enough to move her white draught without concentrating, leaving Derek Yardley to jump over two and take them.
‘I won!’ he whooped. ‘Now you have to pay a forfeit. You have to give me a kiss.’ He laughed before leaning forward and kissing her hard on the lips with his mouth open, forcing his tongue between her teeth. She tried to pull away and turn her head sideways, but he grabbed hold of her hair and forced his tongue right into her mouth; then in one quick movement his hand was up her skirt and touching her inside her knickers, his fingers probing around before frantically tugging at the elastic to force them down.
‘Don’t,’ she said nervously, unsure of what to do. ‘You’re hurting me.’
‘It’s OK, Ruby, just relax. It’s what grown-ups do all the time.’
‘I’m not a grown-up,’ she said fearfully. ‘I want to go now. My tea will be ready.’
‘But you look like a grown-up. I bet you’ve done this before – all the city kids do it all the time – I can tell you know what to do, Ruby. Come on, do it for me …’
He leaned right over, moving his arm from behind her and putting it across her neck. As his breathing quickened so his face flushed and he started wheezing so hard she could hear his lungs rattling. He pulled his hand away from her knickers, arched his back and grabbed inside the already undone fly buttons on his trousers.
But at that moment a voice echoed from below.
‘Ruby? Ruby, where are you? Tea’s ready …’
Derek Yardley turned and hesitated just long enough for her to slip out of his grasp and reach the door, which she was horrified to find was locked, although the key was still there. As she fumbled to open it she looked back over her shoulder to see Derek lying back on the sofa with his upright penis poking out of his trouse
rs and a strange look on his face. Ruby stared a split second in horror before throwing the door back.
‘One word, and I’ll tell them you came up here, that you asked for it,’ he spat as she stepped out onto the top of the outside staircase. ‘One word, you filthy little London brat, and I’ll fucking kill you. One word …’
Ruby stifled a scream and ran down the steps and around to the front of the garage from where she could see Aunty Babs, who was still calling her.
Ruby took a deep breath. ‘I’m here.’
‘Thank heavens for that,’ Babs laughed. ‘I thought for a minute we’d lost you. Have you been good?’
‘I was in the field out the back with Keith and Marian, they’ve just gone.’
‘Come on then. Teatime.’
As she went back to the house, Ruby looked up at Yardley’s window, expecting to see him peering out, but there was no sign of him.
He didn’t ever try to do anything again, and it was only as the years passed and she got older that she became aware of what had actually happened, but still she never said a word to anyone because she could see how lost the Wheatons would be without Yardley to do everything for them.
She was also worried that they might not believe her after so long.
It was easier to pretend it had never happened and just keep away from him as much as possible. Sometimes there was no way of avoiding him and it was then that she remembered, and was aware that actually his resentment was far stronger than hers. It was also as she grew older that she realised he actually hated her for knowing what she knew about him.
The rest of Maggie’s birthday passed in a blur for Ruby. She enjoyed it on one level because the little girl had such a wonderful birthday and she could see how much Babs and George loved every moment of it, but on another level she was fighting the distractions in her mind caused by the resurfacing of her long-buried memories.
She made an effort and pasted on a smile, but all she could see was a beautiful, friendly little girl living in a house that was just a few steps away from the resentful Derek Yardley, who had tried to abuse her when she was a child. She just hoped he never discovered the secret about Maggie’s parentage.