Dragging myself away, I stood and reached down to unbutton my uniform pants. They only made it halfway down my thighs before I was pulling out my straining cock. My need for her was almost painful. I reached down and hooked one of her legs over my arm while guiding the head of my cock to her dripping entrance. When I was fully sheathed inside her, I banged a fist on the wall. She felt like perfection wrapped around me.
Cami gasped as I pumped slowly and deeply inside her. Her head tilted back against the wall as my pace quickened, and I could feel her nails digging into my shoulders through my T-shirt.
This wasn’t going to last long because I was so focused on taking what I needed, what I’d spent a year fantasizing about. I brought her other leg over my free arm and pinned her against the wall with my body as I thrust hard and deep over and over until I felt the explosiveness of my release. Cami shuddered against me, and her body sagged in my arms. I held her firmly, listening to the sound of her heavy breaths mixed with the pounding inside of my chest.
“Too soon,” I panted. “That felt fucking amazing but it ended too soon.”
“We’ve got all night,” she whispered, placing a kiss along my jaw.
Yes, we fucking did. I scooped her into my arms and carried her through the tiny apartment and into her bedroom. Tossing her on the bed like a ragdoll, I leaned over her and placed a smacking kiss on her lips before I stripped my uniform from my body and headed toward the bathroom.
I stepped into the shower and turned on the water, letting the icy coldness beat down on my overheated skin. Just beyond this room was an angel waiting for me. After a year of separation, I was desperate to love her again. To be gentle with her and take my time reacquainting myself with every inch of her creamy skin. But my emotions were held together with the barest of threads.
Flashes of Cami pressed against the wall, her mouth open and gasping for air had me hard again in an instant. Once was definitely not enough. Exiting the shower, I grabbed a towel and strode back into the bedroom.
The sight of Cami stretched out completely naked on the bed waiting for me made my cock ache with need, ready for more of that velvety heat. I made my way to the foot of the bed and grasped myself in my hand, stroking slowly while my eyes took their fill.
“Spread your legs for me, baby,” I commanded her gently. She obeyed silently but kept her hooded gaze on me. I knelt onto the carpet and reached out, grabbing her around the thighs. I tugged and brought her pussy closer to my mouth.
I wanted to drink her, to devour her completely. I wanted to taste her juices on my lips and feel them drip down my chin. I wanted to taste every ounce of her. Gently, I brushed my tongue along her slickened heat, and she shuddered from the sensation. I repeated the action, enjoying each shudder and squirm and squeak. I pulled back and placed two fingers inside her. Her sex clenched around my digits as I pumped them in and out before covering her swollen clit with my tongue. I wanted to send her straight over the edge with just my mouth and fingers.
Cami buried her hands in my hair, tugging at the strands as she moaned out, “Oh, god!”
I ravaged her until I felt her tremble from nothing more than my lips and tongue and hands.
Scrambling up the bed, I was eager to sheath myself in her warmth and bury myself deeply in her love. I wanted to go slow, to consume every inch of her. We rocked together in a sensuous rhythm. This was pure heaven.
Cami looked up at me with her big blue eyes, piercing me, gutting me. I shuddered from the emotional weight of our reunion. I was almost denied this moment, and I was going to cherish it forever.
My hands slipped down her body to grasp the back of her thighs before pushing them against her chest. We simultaneously groaned as this new angle allowed my cock to slide deeper. Slowly, our bodies readjusted and synced. I relished the feel of her small hands on my body as they traced paths up and down my back, over my shoulders, and down my chest.
Cami tensed below me and tipped her head back as a whisper of a whine escaped her lips. I kissed the hollow of her throat, and asked, “Are you okay, baby? Am I hurting you?”
“No,” she rasped. “No, you’re perfect. This is perfect.”
My hands slipped from her thighs, and I wrapped my arms completely around her, holding her body flush against mine. Her legs twined around my waist as our sweat-slickened bodies glided against each other.
“I’m not going to last much longer,” I warned her as I felt a familiar tightening in my balls. Her body tensed beneath mine, and I knew were both so close that it wouldn’t take much to coax her over the edge.
I placed butterfly kisses along her jaw and down her neck and slid a hand between our bodies, letting my fingers strum her clit. I thrust hard and deep until she cried out and shuddered in my arms. I chased my own orgasm until it tore through me, and my cock erupted, filling her with every drop.
I collapsed on top of her until she pushed me off and I rolled to the side. The sounds of our heavy breaths filled the room. Reaching between us, I grabbed her hand and brought it up to my lips.
“I’m a lucky man,” I whispered so softly I wasn’t sure Cami heard me.
She turned toward me and nuzzled her face into my neck. I let her hand drop to my chest and covered it with my own. We stayed like that, still and quiet, not taking a single moment together for granted.
“I need to take a shower,” I announced after a while.
“Are you hungry? I can make you something to eat.”
I shook my head. “Don’t bother. There’s only one thing I’m hungry for.” I popped up and reached for her hand, dragging her from the bed and into the bathroom.
Chapter Eight
Garrett
This last deployment was different. I had been itching to get back home, to have Cami back in my arms, to work side by side with Oliver. I had done everything asked of me and tried my best to stay out of harm’s way, but one day changed everything.
Next to me, an angel slept soundly, her lips curved into a soft smile. The demons inside me were wide-awake, wreaking havoc in my thoughts. I glanced over at her and frowned. She was too thin, no matter what she said. There were dark circles under her eyes, and when she didn’t think I was looking, I saw the heaviness of the burdens she carried. Her shoulders sagged slightly, and she moved with a deliberate slowness. Somehow, I’d get her to confess, but right now, I was too busy guarding my own secrets.
It was going to be impossible for me to sleep, so I busied myself. My duffle had been abandoned in the trunk of Cami’s car, so I slipped from bed, pulled on my T-shirt and boxer briefs, and padded down to the parking lot, hoping none of the other residents were out late at night.
Opening the trunk of the car, I pulled my duffle out and set it on the ground. I looked up toward Cami’s apartment on the third floor. Throughout the weeks of my captivity, she alone remained my constant. I had many doubts about myself, but my love for her was the one truth I held onto every day.
Cami sat in the living room, tucked into the corner of the couch when I returned. I dropped my bag just inside the front door and tried to catch her eye. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up,” I apologized, walking toward her. I sat down next to her, and she curled up in my lap.
“After a year without you, my body knew the moment you left,” she said.
“I’m still re-adjusting,” I tried to explain. “It’s going to take me a few days.”
“Do you need to report to Ft. Lewis immediately?”
“I have forty-eight hours of leave.”
“Good,” she said, looking up at me with a sly grin. “I’m not ready to let you out of my sight just yet.”
I bent my head and kissed the tip of her nose before coaxing her back into the bedroom. It wasn’t long before our bodies gravitated toward each other and found escape in soft sighs and tangled limbs.
I managed three hours of restless sleep that first night back. My eyes popped open when I heard the first sounds of movement, and my heart started beating
rapidly, sweat beading along my brow. It took me a moment to realize exactly where I was, and the sound was probably Cami moving around the apartment.
“Good morning,” she greeted me with a cheerful smile. “I’m making confetti pancakes!”
“I should be taking you out for breakfast. Your birthday was yesterday.”
“Do you really think I care about my birthday, Garrett? All I care about is that you’re finally home.” I was expecting to see disappointment in her eyes, but all I saw was compassion.
I reached out and brushed my thumb across one of her cheeks. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”
We spent the day doing normal things, like grocery shopping. Cami asked for my opinion, but I barely managed a reply. I felt constantly on alert. If Cami noticed, she didn’t say anything.
Bringing in the groceries, I felt strange, like a foreigner. For a year, I’d fantasized about living this life with Cami: enjoying the simplicity of domestic chores with her and going to bed and waking up with her every day for as long as she would have me. But something felt off. This life didn’t feel right; it felt forced.
“I’m going to Ft. Lewis,” I announced, surprising Cami. “Can I borrow your car?”
“Sure,” she said, holding out the keys to me.
I took them from her and kissed her softly on the cheek. She looked confused but didn’t say a word as I left.
As I drove, my head swam with confusion and self-doubt. This wasn’t how I wanted to return home. This wasn’t the man I wanted to be for Cami.
I hadn’t made an appointment because, technically, I wasn’t required to return to base until tomorrow, but I prayed Captain Dennison – the psychologist I was supposed to begin seeing soon – was available today.
Capt. Dennison’s office was pretty nondescript, which was typical for the Army. The military doesn’t do fancy or cozy or homey. In contrast to the austere style of the room, it was hard to miss the stuffed cat sitting on his desk.
“Sgt. Hammond,” he said, greeting me as he entered the office. “I wasn’t expecting you until next week.”
I stood and saluted him, but he waved me off. “I apologize, sir,” I said. “I should have made an appointment.”
He waved me off with a flick of his hand and sat down in the chair opposite me, instead of behind the desk. He was a tall, broad man with the widest smile I had ever seen. His hair was cropped close and speckled with patches of gray that stood out against his jet black hair. “Nonsense, Hammond. My door is always open for you.”
“I appreciate that, sir,” I said nervously. Suddenly, showing up at Capt. Dennison’s office without an appointment felt like a bad idea.
We talked casually for a few moments. He asked me easy questions about my service and recent deployment. This simplistic line of questions immediately put me at ease.
“Now, tell me while you’re really here, Hammond,” Dennison said with a no-nonsense look in his eye.
“Readjustment seems harder than usual,” I told him.
“Well, shit, son! You just got back yesterday. What did you expect?”
I blinked, unsure of how to answer him. “Sir?”
“Hammond, I read your file. I know all about what you went through. That must have been some kind of hell you were in, and I know I speak for everyone here at Ft. Lewis when I say we’re glad you made it out of there.”
“Thank you.”
“But you’re not going to just get over something like that Hammond. This kind of shit takes time.”
“How do I tell my fiancée about all of this?”
“Is that what bothers you the most? Telling her?”
“I don’t want to keep secrets from her.”
“It’ll come out, little by little. Just give it time, Hammond. You’ve been home for twenty-four hours.” He looked at his watch and stood. “Your time is up, Hammond. Now get the fuck out of my office. And make a goddamn appointment next time.”
“Yes, sir,” I said with an embarrassed smile. Captain Dennison offered me his hand, which I took. He stared at me intently for a few uncomfortable moments before his face erupted into a comforting grin.
He clapped me heartily on the back, and said, “This is a marathon, Hammond, not a sprint. We won’t figure it out right away. Go home to your girl.”
I took his advice but stopped at the jewelers in downtown Gig Harbor where I’d bought Cami’s engagement ring. I browsed the cases until I stopped in front of one that had a display of necklaces. One in particular caught my eye, and I asked the saleswoman to take it out of the case so I could inspect it closer. It was two gold circles intertwined; each band was covered with glittering diamonds, and I knew without a doubt that it was perfect.
I returned home to find Cami lost in thought, staring out at the bay from the apartment’s small balcony. Her curls were loose and wild blowing in the slight breeze coming off the water. She wore an oversized T-shirt that hung from her slight frame, exposing one perfectly sun-kissed shoulder.
“Penny for your thoughts,” I said quietly as I approached her.
She turned and smiled easily, but I took a moment to study her, taking note that her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. “An offer came in on my dad’s house,” she told me.
“Well, that’s good, right?”
She nodded slowly. “Of course. But I’d secretly hoped it would just sit on the market. I’m not ready to let it go.”
I gathered her into my arms and held her tight. “Just remember, the memories aren’t in the house; they’re in your heart.”
She squeezed me tight before letting go. “Thank you for reminding me.”
“I’m sorry I just bolted earlier,” I explained. “I met with a psychologist on base.”
“Oh,” she said softly. She looked down at her feet as she shuffled them in place. This was what I worried about; it was clear from her body language that Cami expected me to confide in her easily, but I wasn’t ready to tell her all the deep, dark, nasty thoughts haunting me day and night.
“And I stopped to get you a birthday present on my way home.” I held up the small black gift bag and waited for her to take it from me.
“You didn’t have to get me anything. You coming home is the best present that I could have received.”
“You deserve the world, Cami. Happy Birthday.”
Chapter Nine
Cami
“Garrett is different,” I confided in Valerie. We were meeting for dinner to discuss the surprising offers on our father’s house and to belatedly celebrate my birthday.
“What do you mean?” Valerie took a moment to look up from one of the offers. She placed the paper on the table and gave me her full attention.
“He’s been home for a week, but he’s been avoiding me,” I explained. There was one area where he wasn’t hiding – in the bedroom. When he came home from base, Garrett quietly ate his dinner, took a shower, and then fucked me. It was so robotic and devoid of emotion, quite the opposite of his first forty-eight hours home. Those first two days, he was tender and loving. It almost felt decadent waking up next to him knowing he was there to stay. But every night after we fucked, he’d roll away, take a shower, and sleep on the couch. I was hesitant to worry because I knew he was seeing a psychologist on base to help him navigate the trauma of his captivity. Selfishly, I wanted to be the one to help him, and I was having trouble letting go of the idea that Garrett needed someone more qualified than a woman who loved him with all of her heart but whose idea of therapy was confetti pancakes.
“Well, I’m sure it takes some time to adjust back to life in the States.”
“I expected a little distance, but this is different, Val. This is ...” My voice trailed off because I couldn’t find the words to describe it. “He doesn’t make eye contact with me. He hardly speaks to me.”
Palmer’s cruelty replayed in my mind. Reluctantly, I had to admit I’d assumed I could “fix” Garrett, just as Palmer accurately predicted. And Garrett was simply ta
king what he needed from me. But there were moments when I managed to catch Garrett’s deep and soulful eyes and could see the anguish burning inside them. He was struggling, and I felt utterly helpless.
“Give him some more time to adjust,” Valerie assured me. Then she changed the subject. Her eyes brightened, and she clapped her hands excitedly. “Happy Birthday, Cami! I didn’t want to bother you because I knew you and Garrett would want to spend time together and I know you probably didn’t want to celebrate much after this past year. So here you go.”
She pulled a giant gift bag out from underneath the table and handed it over to me. Eager to see the contents, I parted the tissue paper and pulled out the gift. It was quilt made of my dad’s old T-shirts. I brought it up to my nose, and I swore that I could still smell his familiar woodsy scent.
“Oh my god, Val, this is amazing!” I couldn’t stop looking at every square made up of a T-shirt. So many memories flooded my thoughts.
“I saw the bag just sitting there in your old bedroom, and I didn’t want them to go to waste.”
“I absolutely love it, Val. Thank you.”
“I have one more thing for you,” she said, almost reluctantly. She reached into her purse and pulled out a small blue box wrapped in white ribbon. “It’s from Palmer.”
“Well, you can give it back to him,” I insisted.
“Cami, he’s really sorry. We had a long talk over dinner the other night, and he regrets everything that he said to you.”
I wanted to feel angry that Valerie and Palmer were hanging out together, but I couldn’t find the strength. She shouldn’t have to sacrifice her friendship because of me. Besides, I hated to admit that Palmer might have had a point. Garrett’s behavior worried me.
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