We all split up, working quietly. We found green industrial strength garbage bags most likely meant to clean up after functions in this room. Yeah, we had a party all right. Rachel and Ryder worked on scooping Drake’s remains into the bag. Erin and I gathered any of Drake’s immediate belongings that would mark this room as his final resting place.
“Polina is losing her shit.” Erin scrolled through his phone messages. “No wonder he cheated on her. This chick is crazy.” She looked up at me and smiled sadly. “I can’t believe he’s gone.”
I pulled her in close as she started crying again. “It’s going to be a new chapter for all of us.”
We weren’t the first to do this.
The sun rose above the Arizona desert as Erin and I dug far from the road.
“God, I hope we don’t find anyone else out here.” I remarked as I worked. My nervousness made me want to keep talking. Erin was on another break. I tried not to let it annoy me. Not only were we burying her lover, she just wasn’t made for this kind of dirty work. “All those gambling debts and gangsters. I could practically feel the ghosts when I drove through here before.”
“I don’t care what we find. I just want this to be over with.” Erin sighed, picking up her shovel again and pushing it into the hard sand. I had climbed into the ditch below to deepen it. “What am I going to do, Mellie?”
“The same thing you were always going to do. You weren’t planning your life around him.” I looked up at her. “Please tell me you weren’t.”
“Just as much as you shouldn’t be planning your life around Ryder.” She started working harder.
I stopped to look up at her. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“He won’t give you blood, Mel. It’s pretty much the vampire equivalent to not being able to commit. Not that they ever really commit. I hate to intervene in other people’s relationships, but you need to know. It might be all rosy now, but what is that going to mean for you down the line?”
“It didn’t mean Drake committed to you.” I hit her with sand, kind of by mistake, kind of on purpose. “We’re working on it.”
“Are you both working on it, or just you?” Erin asked.
“I don’t have the choices you do. I’m still wanted by every police department in the country. I have no options but to work on it. Maybe now that Drake isn’t looming over him, he will feel like he’s got more control over other things. It’s a control thing, I think. He told me the blood was the only thing that was truly his. I understood.” There was no harm in confessing to Erin anymore, as far as I knew.
Erin helped me climb out of the hole, and we both pulled the garbage bag out of the trunk. It was heavy and awkward. Drake wasn’t all in one piece. We stumbled over to the ditch, trying not to fall in with the mess on top of us. We dropped the bag in the hole and started burying our secret.
We stomped over the dirt to make the unsettled spot less noticeable. Drenched in sweat, covered in dirt, and exhausted, we fell back into the car, and began the slow, careful drive back to the road. Thankfully, it was still early enough that no one was driving through the middle of nowhere.
Erin fell asleep on the way back to Vegas and I struggled to stay awake as I drove. I wanted to wake her for the company, but she needed the rest more than I did. It surprised me she was able to sleep at all.
Her car was still at the Alta Vista. I didn’t dare drive there and give anyone any trail back to Ryder’s house, so I brought her back with me. Waking her gently, I had her come in the house with me and led her into the extra bedroom, forgetting we had another house guest as well, Rachel.
“Is the couch okay?” I asked. “I’m sorry.”
“I’d sleep on the floor right now.” She accepted the pillow and blankets I handed her. “Do you mind if I take a shower first? I just need to wash yesterday off of me.”
When she was done, I stepped in to the shower and let the warm water scald my skin. This was what I wanted, Drake gone. But I had just wanted him to disappear. I didn’t want his blood on my hands.
Everyone slept until well after sundown. Ryder had invited the rest of the band over for a meeting that night without telling them why. They probably just expected a normal practice.
When the guys gathered in the studio that night, they were surprised to see our houseguests.
“What’s going on here? This looks like a dangerous little party.” Josiah said as Adam eyed Rachel. She was pretty cute once she was cleaned up and acting like a person again. I can’t say I would disapprove of any of the guys pairing up with her. Except for Thomas. She needed someone who would show her the ropes.
“You conveniently missed all the danger.” Erin said, sitting on the arm of the studio couch beside Rachel.
“Well that sounds like a damn shame. Did I miss some girl on girl?” Thomas asked in typical fashion.
“More like boy on boy.” I corrected him.
“Ew. Lovie. No. I guess that means I didn’t miss the girl on girl?”
“Dream on.” Erin rolled her eyes.
“I need to talk to you about Drake.” Ryder tried to steer things back to seriousness.
“Oh come on, man. Don’t tell me he’s got his paws on this solo album. Tell him to back off, Ryder. Grow a pair.” Adam paced back and forth. “I was so looking forward to seeing what we could do with all his constant bitching.”
“You get your wish. Forever.” I fielded puzzled looks from the guys.
“Drake’s dead.” Ryder announced. All of us in the know looked around to see the shock factor, which was surprisingly low.
“Dude, we’re all dead.” Josiah said.
“Ryder staked him.” I sped up the process. There was the shock factor I was looking for. “Drake wanted me to stake poor Rachel. It all went wrong, and Ryder finally took out Drake.”
“Fuck.” Adam stopped his pacing, running his fingers through his hair. “That’s pretty major. What’s going to happen when Talis finds out? She’ll rip all of you apart.” Rachel grabbed my thigh, knowing her fate boiled down to that one way or another. It never made it any easier to hear, I knew that. I didn’t know if Erin and I had anything to worry about from The Mistress, but Ryder and Rachel were definitely going to be in the firing line.
I knew how she felt. Maybe we could all just go to jail together, if we were lucky.
“Everything is taken care of.” Ryder tried to smooth things over. “The girls brought him out to the desert today. We cleaned up the room. No one who wasn’t there will have any idea what happened.”
“His wife is going to come looking for him eventually, God help us all. I’d want to die to get rid of her, too.” Josiah added.
“The whole world will come looking for him! He’s Drake Bonham.” Adam jumped up with his head in his hands.
“One thing at a time. The tour’s over. We’ve got time to figure it all out,” Ryder said.
“Where did this all go down? Here?”
“No. At the Alta Vista.” I said.
“Guys, do you have any idea how many cameras are in that place? There’s no way you’re not caught. Shit.”
“I didn’t know.” Ryder looked panicked.
“I did.” Erin said, almost shyly.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” I tried not to yell at her.
“I didn’t know what was going to happen!” She did yell. “It all happened so fast.”
“You knew what Drake wanted me to do.” I got up off the couch. I couldn’t just sit there.
“But that wasn’t going to alarm anyone. That was what they all wanted you to do.”
Rachel gasped, but everyone ignored her. No one quite knew what to do with her yet.
“So what does this mean for all of us?” Thomas sounded bewildered.
“Well, we get to decide that for ourselves.” Ryder had automatically become the new leader. The other guys needed to be told what to do, where to go. It was just how some people operated. Leaders and followers. “We’ve got some kick ass
songs written so far for this new album, and we can go from there, if that’s what you guys all want to do. I hope it is.”
“I can’t believe you’re all just going to go on like happily ever after when Drake’s dead and no one even cares!” Erin ran out of the room. Everyone looked at each other, not sure what to do. I got up to follow her. I found her in the living room, sitting in the dark, staring into space.
“You can’t be surprised that no one is heartbroken over this.” I said as I sat down next to her. She didn’t answer right away. I didn’t expect her to, so I just continued. “He controlled every aspect of their lives. He made them vampires.”
“I get it. He was an asshole. But I loved him. And it kills me that you guys dismiss him being gone like he just moved away. What you guys don’t know is I saw and heard a lot of things you didn’t. I probably know more about how the vampire leaders operate than the band does. Ryder’s not going to get away with this, Melanie. It’s not going to be pretty. Then you’ll know how I feel right now.”
The waiting truly was the hardest part. Murder had been something Ryder and I had in common throughout our relationship. But now we were all wanted. It changed things.
It certainly changed Ryder, for the better, I thought. He was more serious now, but more sure of himself. The rest of the band needed to look to him for guidance, and he was ready for that role. He would never be Drake. Instead, he was gentle and considerate, yet there was no question who was in control. If it wasn’t for the way it happened, I think he really would have relished it.
It was hard to bring up, even for me. Sure, I knew how it felt to kill your partner in life. Ryder and Drake shared much more than a working relationship or even a friendship. Together, they created an empire. They helped each other define who they became. Even though they didn’t share the physical relationship I did with Jamie, it was more than just losing a friend.
When he wanted to talk, I would be there. It was all I could do. There was no use in prying if he wasn’t ready.
We tried to go on as we did before. The guys worked on the album, and the songs were the best I’d heard from them in years. Probably since Soul Divider’s heyday.
Rachel was still with us. Ryder worked with her, trying to teach her what she needed to know for her afterlife. She’d hit it off with Josiah, and Erin and I were pushing for more to happen with that. We desperately needed something to root for. They went out one night for a while, not an official date according to Rachel, but as soon as they walked out the door, Erin and I jumped up and down with excitement.
Maybe they could have a happy ending.
Erin hadn’t gone home yet, and she hadn’t gone back to work either. I was starting to worry about her. Okay, I was really worried about her. She slept all day, and stayed in her pajamas with dirty hair and no makeup. Erin always took pride in her appearance. She didn’t have an official room at Ryder’s, so she’d take whatever bed or couch that wasn’t in use. When she was awake, she would stare at the TV for hours, watching mindless crap, crying.
I wanted to make it better for her, I really did. I tried to get her to talk, but she only cried more. I asked her about work, or things in Vegas beyond this house, and she would just stare at me like I had lobsters crawling out of my ears.
“I don’t know what to do about her.” I sighed, falling into bed next to Ryder. Another awkward conversation. He was grieving for the same person. He just didn’t have the luxury of wallowing in it.
“Just let her be, babe. She needs time.” He pulled me in close and kissed my hair. I loved it so much when he did that. I curled into him, pulling his face down to mine.
We lay there, just kissing, for a long time. Ryder needed to express things he didn’t have words for yet. I was almost afraid to take the lead that night, my hands wandering underneath his T-shirt and pushing it up. He peeled it off over his head, slipping out of his shorts, and then pulled me back to him without taking off my clothes. I pushed him on to his back and worked my way down his body, making him moan with pleasure and twist his fingers into my hair almost painfully. It felt good. I sucked and worked at him harder, taking him as far in as I could until he finished with a shudder. I crawled back up and rested my head on his shoulder, content, even if all I was going to do was ease his pain.
Ryder tipped my head up, kissing me deeply as he pulled my tank up over my head. I pushed off my own bottoms, his hands were busy with my breasts and I didn’t want him to stop, not even for a few seconds. He took his time, exploring my body like it was new to him. Something was different, more exciting about tonight.
Ryder got up unexpectedly and went over to the closet. I practically wanted to scream in frustration.
“What are you looking for?” I asked, my voice hoarse. “Can’t it wait?”
“It’s waited long enough.” He said without turning around. I wanted to laugh, seeing him kneel bare assed in front of the closet, going through a bag.
He came back to bed with a black velvet bag in hand. I watched him without saying a word as he untied the rope keeping it shut and produced a black handled knife, much nicer than you would find in any kitchen. He didn’t say anything either as he made a slash on the inside of his left forearm.
I gasped at the sight of the blood and forced myself to look into his eyes.
“It’s for you.” His voice was raspy. “I want you to have it.”
My whole body trembled as I took his arm in my hands to steady it. His blood ran burgundy and thick covering his arm in a web like pattern before dripping on to the dark sheets. I closed my eyes and slowly moved forward, trying to get the memory of Drake’s blood out of my head.
How could he taint this moment, even from his desert grave?
I ran my tongue along the wound lightly, shuddering as the blood coated my tongue. I carefully cleaned the spilled blood, it seemed too sacred to waste. I closed my mouth on the open skin, sucking ever so lightly. Little fireworks displays were going off in my brain, rolling through my body like thunder. I wanted to ride every wave. I opened my eyes, looking up at Ryder, seeing him like I never saw before. I could feel every drop of sweat as it tickled my skin. His touch on the back of my neck was like fire. I wanted to wrap myself up in those flames forever.
So many emotions flooded through my body with the blood. Exhilaration, desire, fear. One of my hands dropped away from his arm, grasping at his skin almost violently. Ryder moaned, but he didn’t pull away.
I don’t know how long I drank for when he put his hand with no broken skin under my chin and cupped it, leaning down to kiss me. His skin gleamed and his kiss tasted cold and pure, like fresh snow. Shocking after the warmth of his blood. I had to resist the urge to try to crawl inside of him.
Instead, he found his way inside of me. It was a union like I had never experienced before. A whole new world had presented itself to me, disguised in his blood, and I never wanted him to let me go. I wanted him to wrap himself over my body like a present. I could barely see anything but his eyes. They were so clear in my new, starry reality. Topaz, shining clear. I could see his soul.
When he brought me to climax, I screamed louder than I ever had. I didn’t care who else was in the house. Every muscle in my body locked in appreciation. Ryder fell on top of me, panting, burying his head in my neck to take some of the blood back.
I froze in place, feeling the blood being pulled out of me. I didn’t even feel human anymore. What did this mean? Fear and uncertainty swirled somewhere outside of my body, like it was happening to someone else. The pleasure left no room for anything else.
I gasped when he finished. My body belonged to me only again. I felt a sense of mourning, anticipation. But most of all, bliss.
“I love you.” It wasn’t enough, but they were the only words I had to try to explain how I felt.
“Oh my God, I miss food so much!” Rachel sat on the kitchen counter as I made myself an enormous bowl of popcorn. I was a popcorn purist. No microwave bag crap for me. It had to be mad
e on the stove. I hoped to tempt Erin into eating a little of it, since she had barely touched food since we left Drake in Arizona. Ryder was out with the rest of the band at a meeting with someone, so we girls were left to our own devices. The three of us didn’t have many choices, so we chose to have a movie night. We had blankets and pillows out in front of the giant flat screen. I made snacks, and Rachel and Erin were indulging in Venom cocktails.
“I love going to the movies,” Rachel continued, her Minnesota accent making me smile every time I heard it. “We had a drive-in in Long Prairie that was my favorite. I’d get a huge tub of popcorn, theirs was the best. That smells so good, it’s all I can think of right now.”
It did smell good, almost too good. After having Ryder’s blood, my sense of smell could be likened to a bloodhound. It made food taste more intense, which was sometimes good and sometimes bad. I was relishing the aroma of the melted butter when I caught a strange whiff of really strong perfume.
“You little whore! Where is he?” Both Rachel and I jumped when we heard an unfamiliar shrill voice coming from the den and Erin screaming something we couldn’t make out. Rachel was a blur as she hopped off of the counter and hightailed it out of the kitchen. I had to shut off the stove and move the popcorn before I could follow. We had enough on our hands without setting the house on fire.
“Let go of my hair!” Erin cried at the dark haired woman who had her down on the floor, one fist full of hair and the other around her neck. “I don’t know where he is. Let go of me!”
“It’s just a cheap weave!” The woman pushed down on Erin’s throat. “You cheap whore!”
“It’s still attached to my head.” Erin tried to pry this crazy woman off of her. It wasn’t her style to ever throw a punch, even in self-defense.
Rachel was on top of Erin’s attacker, snarling and hissing. She was about to sink her teeth to her shoulder when I finally unfroze from my shock and was able to say something.
“Rachel! No! What the fuck is going on? Get off of her!” I approached the pig pile of women on the living room floor, wishing I had something more than just my fists to strike this crazy bitch with.
Night Moves (The Night Songs Collection) Page 19