by Rhys Ford
He let himself be moved around the bed, mostly so he could end up against Kane’s side and within reach of the heavy sac and thick cock between his lover’s legs.
His body ached today, small bruises and strained muscles, but they faded into the background, much like the streetlights’ glow peeking in through the heavy curtains. He was more interested in wrapping his mouth around the thick head of Kane’s cock, flexing his tongue against its underside, and dragging a primal groan from his lover’s mouth. With a taste of salt to the back of his throat, a sticky bitter sweetness on his tongue, Miki knew Kane was growing close, so he pulled off his lover’s length to blow a stream of cold air on the overheated velvety head.
“You are killing me, Mick,” Kane grunted, the Irish as thick in his words as his dick was in Miki’s mouth. “I can’t—”
If there was one thing Miki was good at, it was taking Kane into him, and he did just that, tilting his head up and swallowing Kane down. It was always an odd sensation, and no matter how often he did it, there was a brief flutter of panic before Miki remembered how to breathe.
And then he would swallow, the muscles in his throat rippling around Kane’s length, and without fail, Kane would dig his fingers into Miki’s shoulders.
Kane had been right. Kane was always right. Miki needed this. He needed to be able to feel alive and wanted to wash away all the bitterness and filth in his mind and throat. The taste of Kane would take care of all of that, as the press of Kane’s flesh into him would erase every ache in his body.
“Babe, if you don’t stop… I’m not going to be any good for you,” Kane ground out between his clenched teeth. He arched, his fingers in Miki’s hair, gently tugging to pull Miki off him. “I want to be inside of you.”
That was the best idea Miki had heard all day.
His knee was slightly swollen, but Miki was willing to take the pressure of his weight on it when he knelt in the middle of the bed. Kane had other ideas. Kane often had other ideas.
“Lie down on your belly,” Kane rasped. “Lift your hips up so I can put a pillow underneath you.”
It was a position Miki hadn’t liked in the beginning of the relationship. It felt too dominating, too controlling. Then something shifted inside of him, and Kane’s weight made him feel safe. He loved the feel of Kane’s chest on his back and the press of their bodies into the bed. It was harder to reach underneath himself, but the friction against the mattress and Kane’s skilled fingers usually did the job.
Stupidly enough, he loved when Kane bit the back of his neck. It drove him crazier than anything else Kane did to him with the exception of actually being inside of him. It was the little affections that turned their sex into something glorious, a shared intimacy where Miki felt free.
Of course, he also had the sneaking suspicion Kane liked him on his stomach because that way Miki couldn’t bite Kane’s nipples. It was a perverse pleasure he delighted in every so often just to remind Kane he wasn’t always the one in control.
“Open for me, a ghra,” Kane whispered, the whiskey purr of his voice accompanied by the snick of the lube bottle opening. Its scent was sweet, a little bit different from what they normally used, but Miki wasn’t complaining. At least not until Kane’s slick fingers slid down the crease of his ass and the cold lube sent an icy frost over his skin.
Kane simply laughed at Miki’s hiss.
“That’s fucking cold,” Miki grumbled, pulling one of the pillows over to hug against his chest.
The cant of his hips made the small of his back hurt, the spot tender from where he’d struck the lunch kiosk during the shooting. Tiny abrasions on the palms of his hands, the little scores left from the parking lot’s rough blacktop cut through the bruises he’d gotten from wielding the drywall frame. Kane must have seen him moving slowly, or maybe he just knew Miki’s body so well he could tell where he was hurt. As the lube warmed, heated up from their skin, Kane kissed the ache along Miki’s spine.
“Let me make you feel good, Mick.” Kane’s fingers dipped into him and twisted down, spreading the lubricant around. “Just lie there for a moment and breathe. Let me give you this.”
The stretch of flesh around Kane’s fingers was something Miki knew so well. He sometimes had dreams about being spread open, slid into, and having Kane’s muscular arms wrapped around his chest, pulling him back against Kane’s hard body. He’d woken up more than a few times panting and hard, reaching for the man who’d already left for work… already awake, wearing a badge and a gun, pushing back other people’s darkness with the light he had burning inside of him.
It was always best when Miki discovered he wasn’t in a dream, because not only would Kane be there when he was done, Miki would have the feel of him inside for hours afterward.
Those fingers—rough, thick fingers—explored him slowly while Kane’s mouth left trails of kisses along Miki’s shoulders and back. His lips always found Miki’s scars, taking the time to kiss at the twisted curls of badly healed wounds and mottled patches of sheared-off skin. His sides were a landscape of brutality and pain, left over from abuse and the accident that ripped apart his life. But when Kane’s mouth touched on the badly done splotches of ink on his upper arm, Miki’s eyes stung with a sudden rush of tears.
He’d been kissed there before. Only by Kane, but tonight that touch seemed a bit profane. Not the kiss, but the tattoo. It was a part of his body that had been his but a mystery, something he thought he would never know the answer to. So he’d given it over to Kane, and now someone else was trying to lay claim to that spot.
“I can hear you thinking, Mick,” Kane scolded playfully, then slid his hand down, his fingers sliding over the spot inside of Miki where stars were released into his blood. “I must not be doing this right, then.”
“I can definitely stop thinking,” Miki gasped, intending to say more, but Kane’s fingers parted and he lost the ability to think. The tingles along his body were flashes of lightning on the horizon of a storm Kane was going to bring down upon them. “Okay, stopping thinking.”
They’d been together long enough that there were rituals, funny little habits they each did during sex. It had been odd when they no longer used condoms, secure knowing they were safe with each other, but Miki kind of missed the brief pause and Kane’s muttering as he fought with the foil packet. A little bit of nonsense and laughter when his lover needed more lube to ease his way into Miki’s body because his fingers were usually slick and his coordination was off. So Miki twisted over onto his side and reached for the bottle, like he always did.
And looked up at his lover’s beautiful face and sculpted body.
He’d never been religious. In fact, his first true brush with religion came from falling in with the Morgans and their worship of a benevolent God who was sometimes at odds with their church. They were raised carrying the stones of their religion, burdens of morals and ethics they bore on their backs to strengthen themselves. It seemed to be in their blood to help those weaker than them, shouldering others’ troubles as well as their own. He’d been to Mass and heard passionate speeches about love, forgiveness, and forbearance.
For all the lyrical sermons and thoughtful speeches, it was the church’s art that caught Miki’s attention with depictions of Heaven and its warriors holding him in rapture as the Morgans sat around him.
He’d always imagined angels as perfect, ethereal beings, but crossing over the threshold of the house of worship that held generations of prayers, Miki realized he already walked among angels—or at least what he considered their true form.
Because he had fallen in love with one of them.
The power in Kane’s body wasn’t simply the planes of muscles and tight tendons under his skin. As beautiful as his form was, it was the strength of his generous heart that made Miki’s heart clench with emotion. He was gorgeous, imperfect with small battle wounds he earned as a child and more than a few scars he’d absorbed as an adult. His power lay in his ability to make his broad shoulde
rs seem more like a place where Miki could seek comfort rather than feel threatened, and he possessed a quick, sardonic mind cunning enough to make Miki laugh.
Still, as Miki’s gaze touched on the corded strength of Kane’s thighs and muscled belly, then up to his flat chest and strong arms, he was more than willing to admit Kane was a gorgeous man.
“I like the way you’re looking at me, love,” Kane murmured, taking the bottle from Miki’s hand. “Now let’s see if I can get you to shout my name.”
He lay back down, chuckling as he heard Kane swear at the bottle. It was another ritual. Something familiar they’d done more than a few times before, and he liked it. His life had been a whirlwind of changes and chaos. Kane brought with him a foundation and, oddly enough, opened up the sky for him as well.
“Anytime you’re—” Miki’s breath hitched involuntarily at the press of Kane’s fingers on his asscheeks.
He was being parted, opened up enough for him to feel the push of Kane’s hard length at his entrance. He bowed his head, unthinkingly tensing in preparation for the weirdness he would feel. Clutching the pillow to his chest, Miki sucked in a breath and held it as Kane guided himself in.
Miki had no words to really describe how it felt when his lover entered him. The feel of his slick flesh, eased by a sweet-smelling ointment but still there, was a nerve-tingling burn, a tight sensation of oversensitive skin stimulated nearly too much. The initial sear of flesh meeting flesh was over in a few seconds, either burned away by the fire it brought with it or simply washed off because his body couldn’t process any more of its pleasure. The push of Kane into him awoke a need to be filled, to be pushed past what he could take and begin a race toward a summit he could only briefly touch.
Kane held on to Miki’s hips, slowly seating himself. Miki clenched his fingers into the pillow, rocking himself back onto Kane’s length and mewling, needing more—aching for more—even as Kane nestled up against him, his cock fully enveloped by Miki’s body. Kane shifted behind him, the mattress moving slightly between Miki’s parted legs. The soft foam cradled his knees, lessening the strain on him, and his hips absorbed most of the motion. But when Kane began to move, Miki went with him, rolling with each stroke and clutching at the pillows and sheets as waves of pleasure lapped at his senses.
“I’ve got you, Mick,” Kane murmured, settling down over Miki’s back.
Kane slid one arm under Miki’s chest, lifting him up slightly. Kane’s hand worked down between Miki’s belly and the bed, his fingers closing over Miki’s turgid dick. His thumbnail scored a line over Miki’s cock head, digging a razor-sharp edge through Miki’s pleasure.
Oh God, when they began to move. His world changed when Kane moved inside of him. It opened them up in ways that Miki had never imagined experiencing. As much as he lay exposed, his emotions raw and his heart splayed, Kane was right there with him. They fit into each other, giving as much as they took. With each stroke of Kane’s powerful hips, he pushed a bit of himself into Miki’s warmth, leaving behind the fullness of his touch.
He was reaching a point where everything physical melded with the turbulence of emotions building up inside of Miki’s heart and mind, and when it struck, when he merged with the parts of him that made music with the flesh that brought it to life, Miki finally felt whole.
And Kane—stubborn, bossy, gorgeous Kane—was the only one who could hold him together long enough for Miki to feel real.
Kane’s fingers were a delicious glide across Miki’s cock, the slight burr of his skin tantalizing Miki’s shaft. His strokes were short, hampered by the lack of space between them, but any more would have driven Miki too quickly over the edge. He wanted Kane to ride him for a very long time, to keep him stretched open until maybe the sun rose or the world fell away.
The slaps of Kane’s hips on his ass were sharp retorts in the nearly empty room, a percussion roll forming a baseline beneath Miki’s needy growls. Their thrusts soon turned wild, their skin damp with sweat and their muscles aching with the effort of keeping up the rhythm they’d chosen. Kane tightened his grip on Miki, stilling him, but Miki twisted around Kane, clenching and releasing himself and marveling at the primal grunts Kane made over him.
Miki felt the surge of Kane’s shaft thickening inside of him, and his own cock was nearly too tight to be touched, almost too brittle against the waves of sensations rocking Miki’s body. Kane found the spot inside of him, sliding against it time and time again, and Miki could only hold on, lost in the swirl of his nerves exploding and his body clenching with release. The scent of their joining was strong in his nose, the musk of their sex and sweat clinging to the inside of his mouth and filling his throat. The air tasted of Kane and the oddly familiar echo of himself, the hint of salt he’d only tasted after Kane’s mouth had been on him and then they shared a kiss.
“Now, a ghra—oh God.” Kane gave one final push, piercing through the last of Miki’s resolve.
It was always the rush of liquid heat running through him Miki needed from Kane before he could let go. His cock shook in Kane’s hand, splattering over his palm, and Miki shuddered, closing in on Kane so tight he wondered on some level if they weren’t really one person, one heartbeat and one soul.
A spattering of kisses now across his shoulder, and then the sting of Kane’s teeth on the back of his neck. That was the trigger for Miki to find his climax, and the bite helped anchor him in place when he flew apart. He lost sight of anything cerebral he might’ve clung to in that moment, because everything he was became flesh. The ecstasy found in Kane’s touch, on Kane’s cock, was breathtaking—literally a long surge of pleasure hard enough to steal the air from his lungs.
Kane’s thrusts continued, slowing but still strong enough to rock Miki’s body and tilt his hips into the soft pillow beneath him. His belly was wet with come, and Kane’s fingers moved over his stomach, spreading the viscous liquid around. The last of it was playful. The reverberations were lessening even as Miki’s body pulled in, reluctant to give Kane up. They lay there panting, moving only when Miki’s grunts alarmed Kane enough to roll them over onto their sides, but he remained lodged inside of Miki, his softening cock pressed past the tender stretch of Miki’s entrance.
“Damn, I’ve made a mess of you.” Kane chuckled, running his sticky, wet thumb through the damp hair below Miki’s belly button. His breathing was a bit forced, as if he’d been run hard, and Miki took a small pleasure in knowing he’d driven Kane to that point. “We’re probably going to have to change the sheets if we want to sleep here tonight.”
“Too tired,” Miki grumbled. “I don’t care if we stick to the bed. I don’t want to move.”
“Neither do I,” he said, burying his face into Miki’s hair. “I don’t ever want to leave this bed again. Sadly, I’m going to have to.”
Miki needed to say things, needed to promise his cop. He could see Kane’s hands spread over his chest in the dim light of the room and then move down his belly. He captured one thumb in his fingers, pulling the hand up to his mouth so he could kiss Kane’s palm. Miki tasted himself on his lover’s skin and closed his eyes, wondering what he’d done to deserve the man he’d found.
“I’m sorry for today,” he whispered into Kane’s open hand, into the darkness creeping over them as night fell further down over the city and the streets doused their lights. “I was out of control today. That man—I shouldn’t have lost it. I never meant to go that far—”
“He wasn’t hurt as bad as he let on, but I’m going to have to agree with you, it was too far.” Kane held him, rocking Miki in his arms. “Not just because of you hitting him a few times, but because—and do not take this wrong—because you never reach out to any of us for help. You are not alone, Mick. We are all here for you. I am here for you. That is how you get lost. Because you see no one around you when things go bleak. You wrap yourself up in the dark that you carry, and you don’t let any of us in. I need you to let me love you, a ghra, and I need you to find me before yo
u break so I can hold you until you heal. But most of all, I need you to remember I love you. Through thick and thin, Mick.”
“It’s hard sometimes,” Miki whispered, the day finally catching up with him. Lethargy stole into his bones and he drifted, cradled in Kane’s warmth. “I’m afraid to ask, I think. Because it would break my heart if you said no. And not no to things like when you had to help with the shooting. I don’t know where my head was at then, but—I don’t know what I’m saying—I guess I’m just always scared. And I’m kind of sick of it.”
“You find someone to talk to, and I’ll be here to listen as well,” Kane promised. “Just like I’ll be here in the morning to help you peel the sheets off of us. Because if there’s one thing I’m very sure of, Miki my love, we’re not moving from this bed again.”
“You have to move,” Miki mumbled, his eyes growing heavy. “Who else is going to let the dog in? It’s either you, or I have to climb over you to get out, and I’ll just knee your balls if you make me do that. And just so you know, I love you too. More than anyone else in the world. I never want to live without you, K. I might not say it, but that’s how I feel. I want to be better for you. A better person. Someone who can hold your hand out in the open or… all of that.”
“Do you love me enough to let the dog in?” Kane teased.
“Yes.” Miki yawned, scrunching down into the pillows. “But I also know that you love me enough to do it for me. So let him in so we can go to sleep, and I will try my best not to fuck up tomorrow.”
Chapter Eight
A bit of silver for a lady
Slice of gold for a guy
Giving out my soul in pieces
Got to give it all away ’fore I die
Need to leave this world better
Better than when I found it that first day
Dance my way on through to Heaven
Hoping Hell’s devils and demons