SEAL Do Over (A Standalone Navy SEAL Romance) (SEAL Brotherhood, 6)
Page 21
“I want you to see me,” I said softly.
“Can I wash you?” he asked.
“Yes,” I responded.
He reached past me, grabbing the washcloth on the rack by the shower. His hard meat pushed against the soft flesh of my outer thigh as he claimed the cloth. He reached the other side of me, grabbed the body wash, and pulled back, slowly pouring it onto the cloth, and then lathering it up.
“You’re absolutely beautiful,” he gasped, finally taking a full look at my nude body.
The warm water pushed my hair back from my face, flowed down my back and tickled the crack of my ass. Luke started with my neck, washing the skin gently, moving slowly to my breast, taking time with each one to ensure their cleanliness.
I couldn’t believe I was doing this. I couldn’t believe this felt so good, so natural.
His words were sweet, but his movements even sweeter as he continued to wash my shoulders, my arms, and the tips of my fingers.
He turned me to get my back, taking time to make circular motions with the cloth on my ass that was finally starting to fill back out.
When I turned back around, he was blushing, his lips curled into a wild grin.
“You want me to wash everything?” he asked.
I nodded.
He knelt in the tub, pulling the cloth along each leg, and then in between them. The sensation that filled me was indescribable, undeniably satisfying. I opened my legs, parting them enough that he could show the same tender and tedious attention to my delicate lady parts as he had my breasts, my ass, my neck.
A sigh escaped his lips, and then a deep groan followed. I knew seeing me like this, touching me like this was driving him wild. It was driving me wild.
He stood, pulling me into him as he reached the shampoo. He scrubbed my hair, using his nails to dig into my scalp, and then rinsed while holding his hand over my eyes to avoid soap seeping in.
When it was my turn, my body was already on fire. I washed his neck, carefully tracing the burns that ran from his ear to his left pec. I wondered how badly it hurt when it happened, or if the pain came after. Was the physical pain as bad as the emotional scars that were left no one could see?
It was clear that Luke was struggling with my touch. His groans grew louder as I stroked his legs, moving closer to his manhood with the soapy cloth with each stroke.
Finally, I couldn’t help but kneel down, give him the same attention he’d given me. His body was amazing, every part of him a fascination to me. I was gentle with his balls, careful not to pull at the hairs that poked from around them, from them. The cloth slid easily up and down his shaft as I scrubbed, and his groans turned to growls.
Partly, I knew what I was doing to him, but partly, I didn’t. This experience was new to me, so when he gripped my shoulders, his body shaking, and the muscle in my hand began to throb violently, I was actually quite shocked. It felt powerful to have that control over a man. I finished with his back and then his hair, and shut the water off after we rinsed.
We didn’t speak as the shower curtain pulled open, and Luke reached for the only towel. He carefully dried me, my body still quivering from the tension built up. The cotton against my swollen labia and clit was nearly explosive. I started to dread that I ended the party so quickly.
Luke finished drying himself, and then scooped me into his arms. He carried me to bed, laying me on the mattress, my hair still wet, my body still quivering.
“Can I bring you to climax?” he asked.
It sounded so clinical, but something about the way he said it brought the tingle back to full strength between my legs.
“How?” I asked, unsure what he would do with the limp and exhausted cock between his legs.
“I want to taste you,” he said with a rasp.
My body shook with excitement.
“Yes,” I gasped, opening my legs to allow him to show me what he meant.
He started with my lips, kissing them gently, and then shoved his tongue between them, stroking mine and giving me a sensation I’d never felt from a kiss. He moved to my neck, my breasts, then slowly down my navel.
I was waiting, ready, so excited for him to touch my swollen flesh between my legs, but he didn’t. Instead, he kissed my toes, my calves, ran his tongue up the inside of my thighs, stopping just before reaching my aching flesh.
Finally, when he’d teased me enough, he slid between my legs, gently teasing my flesh in a way I’d never experienced. This felt like it was all about me, only for me, and I loved that. Men in my life took; this was giving, and my body responded quickly.
I arched my back; my hands clasped against my breasts without my consent or control. It wasn’t long before my body began to shake, and I didn’t teeter on the edge this time; I leaped from it, embraced the fall, enjoyed the spiral, and let out my cries of pleasure without restraint.
Yes. This was giving. This was new. This was something I loved.
Chapter 39
Luke
Tiny sharp nails dug into my scalp. What the fuck?
My eyes opened, and I looked upward towards the pain. I heard the steady purr of the kitten above me and felt the tickle of his long fur against my face and the slap of his tail on my arm. He kneaded with everything he had in his little body. I wasn’t sure if he was trying to make me happy or trying to kill me.
I reached up, carefully moved him to the side of the pillow, and turned towards Candace.
She was still asleep. It felt amazing to wake up next to her, and I watched her, waiting for that moment when she opened her sleepy eyes and spoke. I hoped she wouldn’t be timid or panicky, but I was prepared for anything.
My hands traced around her neck, to her exposed breast, and then back up again. Her eyes opened. She quickly covered herself, slid to her side, and smiled.
“Good morning,” she said shyly.
“Good morning,” I smiled, realizing that she may need some space.
I knew she’d taken a big step with the shower, and with allowing me to pleasure her, so I understood her need.
“How about I go get us some breakfast?” I suggested.
She nodded eagerly. I wasn’t sure if she was more eager for the food or to get me out of there. It didn’t matter. I loved her, and I’d handle whatever she threw my way.
I dressed in my muddy clothes, stopped by my cabin to change before heading to the cafeteria, and stood in line with all the others who didn’t feel like getting out on this dreary Sunday morning.
Luckily, a fresh batch of biscuits and gravy hit the lie just as I made it there, so I loaded up two Styrofoam containers and grabbed a couple forks and two coffees, and headed back to Candace’s place.
I knocked as I opened the door, just to alert her I was back. She was already out of bed, dressed, and sitting at the kitchen table.
I didn’t question if she was okay. I knew she was, or at least, she would be. I’d give her space.
We ate only talking about how good the food tasted, and then my phone rang.
The number was unfamiliar, and I thought about not answering, but something told me to take the call.
“Hello,” I answered.
“Hey, Luke; it’s James.” The voice on the other end of the phone was familiar and slightly shaky.
“Wow, I haven’t heard from you in a thousand Sundays,” I exaggerated a bit.
“I know man. I’m just trying to catch up with everyone,” he said, his tone dull.
“Is everything okay?” I asked.
“Well, Yeah. I’m okay. I just, I’ve struggled some,” he admitted, something I knew was hard for a SEAL, a soldier, a Marine, anyone who’d served their country.
“How are things with you?” he asked, changing the topic.
It was a typical move, but I wasn’t too concerned. I knew that he called for a reason, and even if I didn’t find out what that was in this call, I’d find out soon enough.
I told him about the ranch, the good work they are doing to help people
like me, like him, like all of us. Candace was watching me as I told him about her, how I reconnected with her after all these years, and that I couldn’t be happier.
“That sounds amazing. That place, it must be one hell of a ranch,” James sighed.
“It is. You should come visit; you might just like it enough to stay,” I pushed a little to see where it would get me.
“I just might. Hey man, I’ve got another call coming in. I’ll call you back,” he said, and then quickly hung up.
I set my phone on the table. The phone call confused me. James was tough, confident, strong, but that didn’t sound like the James I knew.
“That was one of your SEAL brothers?” Candace asked.
I nodded.
“There’s something wrong. He didn’t want to tell me, but he will. I’ll find him, find out what’s happening. Family sticks together,” I grinned.
Her head tilted, and her lips curled into a smile.
“It’s really nice that you have that, a family,” she said softly.
“You know, Candace, or maybe you don’t, so I’m just going to say it. I love you. I’m madly in love with you,” I admitted aloud for the first time. “You could have that family too,” I added with a smile.
Her eyes were gleaming, and I knew she was taking the declaration well, but she wasn’t doing much in the way of responding.
“I’m not sure if I know how to love,” she sighed, reaching across the table and taking my hand in hers.
“I can teach you,” I smiled.
She laughed.
That wasn’t a no.
Epilogue
Candace - A Few Months Later
It was the third Monday evening spent in the dimly lit basement at the ranch. Group therapy, Lyla’s idea, and so far, it was a good one. The group of people was pretty diverse, some women, some men, some military, some abuse survivors like myself.
There was one girl there, Hannah, whose shares always intrigued me. She had a life similar to mine, in and out of foster homes, and then an abusive man. She had four kids, three now after the baby was drowned in a tub by her enraged husband. Listening to what she’d gone through, how she’s survived and moved on, was inspirational to me.
I was sticking to my online courses, the GED already passed, and now diving into the college course I needed to get into a school offering a veterinarian degree. I reached down between the chairs, taking Luke’s hand in mine as Harold started to speak. He was one that always brought up feelings in Luke that caused him to be quiet for a couple days afterward.
He stood, not a tall man, and spoke about his time in the Marines. He didn’t have a life to go back to; serving his country was all he knew, and the men beside him were the only family he had. He was in Afghanistan, and four out of the nine guys that he considered his brothers were gone. He blamed himself every day that he was still alive.
“They would be wounded, sent to the hospital, and then come back on their own choice. One by one, each man who was given that choice came back, and then died,” he had told the group the first week we were there.
Harold was hit with an IED, and he was given that same choice, and he chose to come home. He considered himself a coward, and he hated looking at himself in the mirror, but he refused the cosmetic surgery that could smooth the burnt skin on his face.
It was hard to understand why he blamed himself, but having Luke in my life, realizing how close he was—still is—with all his SEAL brothers, it was easier to understand.
Neither I nor Luke spoke at the first meeting. We listened to a lot of stories, many of them we could relate to. The second meeting, Luke spoke, and his words brought me to tears. I loved that he could be that open, not just with me, but with total strangers.
He talked about the IED that burnt him, bringing attention to his squad and costing three of his men their lives. It was the first time I’d heard the story, and it became clear to me why these men stuck so closely together. A lot of them were like Luke, loners, foster kids, boys without family, hopes of a future. They joined for much more than just serving their country; they joined for a sense of belonging, for unity.
This meeting was our third, and I was going to take Lyla’s advice about speaking out and reaching out. She told me it would be good for me to share my story, to disempower the memories by letting them go into the universe. It was scary to show my vulnerability to people I didn’t know. I feared curling up in a ball, shaking, freezing in my spot with the giant elephant sitting on my chest to hold me down.
Harold finished speaking, and Luke squeezed my hand tightly.
“Anyone else want to share?” Lyla asked the group.
Her eyes scanned past mine but didn’t linger to add pressure. I stood.
“I do,” I said loud and clear. “I was in and out of foster homes my entire life. I don’t even remember if I had a mom or dad that ever wanted me. Social workers, foster parents, they wouldn’t give me that information when I was old enough to ask. The last home I was in was the worst. It was where I lost myself. It was stolen from me by a monster that lived not too far from here. The mom, Wilma, she knew what was happening, but she didn’t care. I left, leaving behind the only good thing in my life,” I turned and looked at Luke.
“From there, I met a man who said he would help me, get me out of this town. He never did. He kept me caged not far from the house I escaped from. He was worse than the man I’d left, but I had no way to get away. I was young, stupid, scared, and stripped of all the necessary tools to navigate this life, confidence, self-esteem, strength, morals, so I was lost, and I remained lost, until the good thing I left found me in the middle of the road,” I smiled at Luke.
I got into the details of the abuse from the foster dad, telling the group that he caught me having sex with my boyfriend and threatened to ruin him if I didn’t go along, ruin me too. He had plans, I didn’t; I told the group that I was always going to be nothing, but this boy would grow up to be a man, a real man, someone that mattered, that helped others, so I thought I was making the ultimate sacrifice, but I wasn’t. I was stupid. I could’ve let that boy become a man then, standing up and saving me, but I didn’t. I robbed him of that chance, robbed myself of a life, and now I stood, broken, trying to heal, and ready to admit my wrongs.
Lyla smiled in my direction and encouraged me to go on. I told them about Damien, how he brutally raped me, often with objects instead of himself. How he locked me in the trunk when it stormed, drove me around town, sold me to his friends for drugs, beat me, told me I was worthless, and refused to kill me or allow me to kill myself, so I could remain punished and miserable.
Luke was in tears when I turned back to him, but he forced a smile on his face.
I was healing. We both were.
“I know the man you’re talking about, the foster dad,” a woman spoke up when I sat down from speaking.
I stared at her, glued to her as I waited for her to give me information. My heart raced at the thought he was still in town, somewhere close, and that he could somehow get to me again. Breathe. Breathe. Just breathe.
“He went to prison for child molestation. He was killed inside once word got out what he’d done to all those kids,” the woman finished.
“The mother, what happened to her?” I asked.
“She was long gone before he was killed. People say she gassed herself in her car in the garage,” she finished.
A part of me was elated, but mostly, I was relieved. I was glad they got what they deserved. I only wished I could’ve been a part of bringing him down.
After the session, Lyla thanked me for finally speaking. I told her it was worth it to find out that the monster who started the demise of my life had been handed justice, even if not by my own hands.
Luke wrapped his arm around me and walked me to the ranch grounds. It was a cool night, and so many stars lit up the sky, it was like a late afternoon.
“Wanna take a walk?” Luke asked.
I nodded.
We walked through the grounds, stopping in the barn to visit all my critters.
“You’re going to make an amazing veterinarian one day,” he smiled.
“I’ve got to get through the basic courses first,” I laughed.
“You will,” he assured me.
There were new litters of kittens, three new baby pigs, and two newly born goats. The barn and the ranch were growing, with plenty of new faces everywhere, not just in the barn.
“Move in with me,” Luke blurted out, grabbing me by the hands.
I was stunned.
“Not here. Let’s buy our own place, somewhere close so we can still work here helping others, and you can bring baby animals home whenever you want,” he added as the kicker he knew would wrap me around his finger.
“A farm of our own?” I gasped.
“Yes. I want you to be mine forever. I’ll get a ring if that’s what you want,” he paused, staring at me like he was scared of my rejection.
“I love you,” I blurted for the first time.
“I love you,” he gasped, his expression softening, but his grip on my hands tightening.
“Let’s do it. But nothing fancy,” I smiled.
I was finally making all my own decisions, and I was certain they were all good ones this time.
Click here to get my book Mr. Billionaire for FREE
SEAL’S SECRET BABY
By Ivy Jordan
Click Here To Read The Entire Book
Chapter 1
Liam
Wow. The small town where I grew up had hardly changed. I walked along the cobblestone path, soaking in nostalgia. The hardware store, the bank, even the uneven clang of the church bells: it was all the same.
I could’ve stepped off a time machine, and nothing would’ve been different. It was the same town I grew up in, the same one where I rode my bike through the streets, where I turned in bottles for spare change, and where I’d received my first kiss.