by Peggy Webb
“No, Tanner . . . don’t.” Her words came out in small, breathless spurts.
“I remember every delicious inch of you; those gorgeous legs, that tiny mole inside your right thigh, your rosy nipples and the way I could make them hard by looking at them.” His gaze held hers as he caressed her through her silk robe. “The way they are now. You want me. Say you do.”
“Yes . . . oh, yes.”
“I love you, Mandy. I want to marry you. And I don’t know if I have the patience for a long courtship.”
“No.” She could barely speak the word, but she knew she had to. “Please don’t, Tanner.”
“I believe you love me, Mandy. Can you deny it?”
His hands were still on her, doing remarkable, wonderful things. She could see so deep into his eyes, she imagined she’d glimpsed his soul.
“It doesn’t matter anymore.”
“It matters—to both of us.”
“Forget what I once felt for you, or what I feel for you now. We can never have a future together. Claude—”
“Will never come between us again.” His expression became fierce. “Dammit, Mandy. Say you love me.”
Her laugh was shaky. “You’re wasting your time with me.”
His mouth covered hers swiftly, greedily. She leaned into him, fitting every inch of herself to his muscular body. Her emotions were in a frenzy because she knew that what they shared—something so wonderful, so right, so good—had to end.
She tried to pull back from his kiss, but he took her mouth again, this time with an aching tenderness and an unbearable sweetness. She felt as if he were wrapping rainbows around her heart. The brightness radiated through her, and she caught a glimpse of what it would be like to be his wife. He was a man who knew how to cherish a woman.
What she couldn’t say to him earlier, she spoke through the kiss. She loved him. Now and always. No matter how many years or how many miles came between them, she would never be free of Tanner Donovan. With all her heart she wished Claude would vanish, would disappear as if he had never existed. She knew she was being foolish and selfish and childish, but there was no other way they could be happy together. The knowledge shattered her.
Tanner held her long after the kiss had ended. Tucked close to him, she felt secure and needed and loved. She rested her head against his shoulder and let the feelings wash over her.
She placed a soft kiss on his neck. “I have to go to work.”
“I know, love.”
“You have to release me.” Her voice was gentle with love.
“Only temporarily.” He eased his hold. “Your breakfast, my darling.” He placed the gingerbread boy in her hand. “It goes well with a tall glass of milk. I want the mother of my children to be healthy.”
“I can accept your food and your friendship, Tanner, but nothing more.”
He smiled. It was a little-boy-trying-to-be-brave look that made her want to cuddle his head to her breast.
“I have four older brothers who’ve all wooed and won the women they love. It would be a shame to break the Donovan track record.”
“I know losing is not your style, Tanner, but you’ll just have to get used to the idea.”
“Mandy, love, when my brothers get through tutoring me on the finer points of courtship, you won’t be able to say no.”
She remembered him as a little boy, bringing bitter weeds to his mother. Saying no to him made her feel like a miserly old hypocrite. Lord, she thought, what a mess life could be sometimes.
She held out her hand. “Good-bye, Tanner. Please thank Anna for the gingerbread.”
“It was her pleasure—and mine.”
He kissed her hand. “Remember the milk, Mandy. And by the way, there’s a note in your kitchen I think you should see.”
He left, whistling.
Amanda stood in the doorway watching until she could no longer see his car. Then she went to her kitchen. The note, propped on her table, was the first thing she saw. He must have put it there Monday night, she decided, after she had taunted him with her striptease act.
She laid the gingerbread aside, picked up the note, and read. “This time, Amanda, you’ll choose me.”
She felt tears forming. Tearing the note in half, she threw it in the wastebasket.
“I won’t cry.” She shut her eyes. The tears eased out from the corners of her lids and inched down her cheeks. She rubbed them away with her hands. “I will not cry.” Her gaze fell on the gingerbread boy. She remembered what Tanner had said about the milk and the children. She covered her mouth with her hands as the sobs shook her. “Oh, Lord, Tanner. Am I wrong?”
She choked back her sobs and stood very still, listening.
The silence in the house mocked her.
o0o
Maxine had already opened the shop when she arrived.
“I’m sorry I’m late.”
“Ten minutes is not late. It’s common sense. Especially when you look like you do.”
Amanda placed the gingerbread boy and the half-pint of milk on her desk. “How’s that?”
“Beautiful but pale. Are you sick?”
“No. Just tired. I haven’t been sleeping well. It’s the Christmas rush, I guess.”
“I won’t burden you with my opinion on that subject.” Maxine took a stack of petticoats out of a trunk and began to hang them in a massive walnut armoire. “I’m glad Dorothy and Janet are coming in tomorrow to work the rest of the Christmas season. They love it, and we need their help.”
Amanda sat down at her desk and began to eat. The gingerbread was spicy and the milk was cold. She tried to clear her mind, but as she nibbled first on the head and then on the arms of the gingerbread boy, she thought of all the Donovan grandchildren crowding into Anna’s kitchen, waiting for a hot batch fresh from the oven.
She put the thought firmly out of her mind.
“I’m glad you’re changing the petticoats. They show up better over there.”
“I thought so, myself. Think what a clever woman Wilford is getting.”
“I agree.” She ate the last crumb of gingerbread and tossed the empty milk carton into the wastebasket. It was amazing how much better she felt. She stood up, smoothing her blue wool skirt and sweater. “Time to open shop.”
They were busy until well after lunch. It seemed to them that half the women in Greenville had chosen Wednesday morning to shop. The stock of velvet and satin dresses dwindled, and even the wedding gown they’d bought at an estate auction in Vicksburg was sold.
“Shall we bring out the one you got in Savannah?” Maxine asked.
It was Amanda’s favorite, a shimmering concoction of antique satin and lace with intricate beading that today’s seamstresses would never attempt. The dress was a perfect size eight. Her size.
“No. Let’s wait on that one.”
Maxine smiled but said nothing.
They took advantage of the lull to bring out some Victorian blouses and make minor repairs. They had moved their chairs close to the window to be nearer to the light.
Maxine was the first to see the lavender car coming up the street.
“Would you look at that?”
It was a 1967 El Dorado Cadillac convertible with the top down. Two Texas longhorns were attached to the front fender. The woman driving it looked like a Gypsy. Her wild black hair was blowing in the wind, and the arm she had hanging over the side was covered with bangle bracelets.
Amanda’s mouth fell open. In the passenger seat was Tanner Donovan. Her heart did a quick rhumba, then settled into a painful thud. She knew she should be relieved that he had finally given up on her, but she wasn’t. Furthermore, she wanted to shove that Gypsy woman out of the front seat and into the dirt.
“It didn’t take him long, did it?” she muttered.
The car came closer. Crowds of curious onlookers blocked their view. Maxine stood up so she could see.
“I might have known. It’s Hallie Donovan.”
Amanda felt as if she mig
ht float off to Mars. “Hallie? Are you sure?”
“Yes. I should have known. They say all she took from her divorce to that rich man was the lavender El Dorado Cadillac and two dogs. Can you imagine that? Just an old car and two dogs. As a matter of fact, that’s them in the backseat.”
Once Amanda had spotted Tanner, she hadn’t noticed the dogs. She stood up and peered over Maxine’s shoulder. Two great Danes, looking as big as Shetland ponies, were sitting on the backseat, their upright ears saluting the December breeze.
Amanda smiled as she watched Hallie swing the car into a parking place without checking her speed. Hallie always had been a wild one, more like Tanner than any of his other brothers or sisters. They even looked alike; both had dark hair and silver eyes, and both were tall, handsome, and reeking of self-confidence as they descended from the car, acting as if riding around in a lavender Cadillac with bullhorns on the front was a natural thing to do in Greenville.
“Life will never be dull for those two,” Maxine remarked.
Amanda silently wished she could find out.
Tanner stood beside the car, looking across the street directly at her shop, while he waited for Hallie to give orders to her dogs. When Hallie leaned into the car to talk to the animals, every man within view almost had a heart attack. Her trim rear, perched high and tight on her long coltish legs, was encased in jeans so snug, they looked as if they had been painted on. To make matters worse, she talked with her whole body, jiggling her bracelets and her derriere with equal aplomb.
A crowd the size of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir gathered around the Donovans, impeding their progress as they started toward Amanda’s shop. Tanner and Hallie dispensed handshakes and hugs as if they had invented them.
The shop sizzled with energy when they stepped through the door.
Halite swooped down on Amanda, gave her a quick bear hug, then leaned back to look at her. “Since I got home Tanner has talked of nothing but you. I insisted on seeing your shop.”
Tanner laughed. “Hallie’s up to mischief, Amanda. Pay no attention to a word she says.”
Hallie’s bracelets jingled as she waved him aside. “Go over there and spend some of your money, Tanner. Buy me a present. I want to talk to Amanda.”
“Don’t be bossy, Hallie. It’s unbecoming in a lady.”
“I’m no lady,” Hallie rejoined, chuckling.
Maxine had taken refuge behind the jewelry counter, and Amanda finally managed to catch her breath and get a word in edgewise.
“I’m glad to see you, Hallie.” She’d be glad to see the devil if he had Tanner in tow, she decided. Her gaze swung around the shop till she found him. He looked up from a stack of Victorian blouses and winked. “You’re home for the holidays?”
“I’m home for as long as the spirit moves me. Wolfgang and Ludwig and I are just batting around the country, looking for fun and adventure.”
“Wolfgang and Ludwig?”
“My Great Danes. They like classical music.” Hallie hooked her thumbs through her belt loops, tipped back on her heels, and gave Amanda an appraising look. “Tanner was right. You’re even more beautiful now than when the two of you were engaged.”
Tanner caught Amanda’s eye and blew her a kiss. Hallie didn’t miss a thing.
“Are you planning to marry this cocky brother of mine?”
“No.” Amanda avoided Tanner’s gaze when she spoke. She wondered if Hallie had guessed his intentions or if he had told her. Probably the latter. It wouldn’t surprise her if he hired a plane and wrote it in the sky. He never could do anything the ordinary way.
“That’s smart.” Hallie’s eyes twinkled with mischief. Amanda knew that Hallie idolized Tanner, always had, even when she was a pigtailed first grader and Tanner was in junior high. She was also quite a prankster and loved playing the devil’s advocate. “Tanner has too much money. Men with too much money can be a pain in the—”
“Association,” Tanner said, cutting in smoothly. He was having a hard time holding back his laughter. “Hallie believes in guilt by association. Men with bank accounts of more than six figures are automatically guilty of all sorts of wicked deeds, including keeping their women in gilded cages.”
He left Maxine at the cash register totaling a huge stack of merchandise, and crossed the room to Amanda and Hallie. Wrapping them both in a bear hug, he continued. “Hallie enjoys rabble-rousing. Actually she’s embarrassed to say what she really thinks about me. She thinks I’m wonderful. Just as you do. It’s a pity that both of you are too shy to say it.”
Amanda and Hallie laughed.
“What did I tell you? A pain in the—”
“Arrogant,” Amanda said, “He was always arrogant.”
“Listen to the two of them, Maxine. The slings and arrows of love. They’re wild about me.”
“Everybody is, Tanner, and if they’re not, they ought to be ashamed of themselves.” Maxine waved her arm over the stack of Victorian blouses and petticoats, velvet dresses, and beaded gowns. “Do you want all this gift-wrapped?”
“Yes, please. In one big box.”
Hallie whooped for joy. “For me, Tanner? You got all that for me?”
“Weren’t you the one who wrote a letter to Santa and slipped it under my door not more than ten minutes after you arrived in Greenville?” He released her and tousled her hair. “For a woman who vows to hate money, you sure do love the things money can buy. You’re a fraud, Hallie. Lovable but a fraud.”
She laughed. “Watch what you say, buster. I’ll sic all my older brothers on you.” Suddenly she stood very still, cupping one hand around her ear. “Do I hear a noise? It sounds like the rushing of little airplane wings.” She took Amanda’s hand and tugged her toward the door. “Come on, Amanda. We don’t want to miss this.”
Tanner followed them and circled his arms around Amanda’s waist from behind. “My baby sister was supposed to be subtle. Nonetheless, she got the job done.” He rested his chin on Amanda’s hair. “Look up, love. I’ve planned a surprise for you.”
Spider Hendrix’s yellow crop-dusting plane flew low over Washington Street, trailing a huge banner across the sky: “Amanda, I love you. Tanner.” Before the banner was out of sight, Spider dipped and turned back toward the antique shop. A curious crowd blocked Amanda’s view.
Tanner walked her through the door. “We don’t want to miss the show.” He lifted her to his shoulder with no effort at all. With one hand supporting her bottom and the other holding her legs, he grinned up at her. “Comfortable?”
She affectionately smoothed his hair. “Oh, Tanner. This is too much.”
“Is that good or bad?”
“I’m not sure.” Shading her eyes against the afternoon sun, she tracked the plane until it was out of sight. The banner proclaimed to the entire city what Tanner had been professing since the night before. “That was a good show, Tanner. It’ll give everybody something to talk about besides Christmas presents and the weather.”
“It wasn’t just a show, Mandy.” He caressed her legs. “I meant it. I mean it.”
Before she could argue with him, she heard the roar that signaled the return of the plane. Looking up, she saw not Spider’s plane but the red crop duster belonging to Toad Ellis. The banner streaking along behind him declared, “Marry me, Amanda. Say yes.”
There was a collective sigh from the crowd on the sidewalk.
Perched on Tanner’s shoulder, Amanda heard everything that was said.
“Isn’t that romantic?”
“Nobody but Tanner Donovan would propose like that.”
“Did she say yes?”
“She’d be crazy not to.”
“After all these years! Who says love doesn’t conquer all?”
As the plane became a speck in the sky, the crowd dispersed, all still talking.
Amanda brushed a telltale tear from her eye and put a brave smile on her face.
“Would you put me down now so I can go back inside, Tanner?”
; He lowered her until her feet touched the sidewalk, letting her slide against his body so that every inch of her felt branded by him.
“Mandy?”
He had such a look of happy anticipation on his face that she wanted to cry. How could she deny her love for this man? she wondered. But she knew she must, for both their sakes.
Lifting her hands, she touched his face. “It was a beautiful gesture. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
He waited. She could feel the tension in his body. “Please, Tanner. I can’t marry you. It would be a mistake.”
“Do you love me, Amanda?”
Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath. He deserved the truth. “Yes.” She opened her eyes and saw the joy in his face. “Yes, Tanner. I can’t seem to help myself. I’ve fallen in love with you all over again.”
“That’s enough for now.” His lips touched hers as gently as spring dew on new leaves. “I want to marry you, Mandy. And I’m not a patient man. I won’t sit back and wait. I’ll pursue you to the gates of hell, if that’s what it takes to convince you you’re wrong.”
“Somehow I thought you would.”
“You’re smiling, Amanda. I take that as a sure sign that I’ll win.”
“You take everything as a sign that you’ll win.”
He shrugged. “What can I say? Winning’s my style.”
She patted his cheek. “Not this time, Tanner. This is not a game; it’s life. We nearly destroyed each other once. I won’t let that happen again.”
He bent down and kissed her, swiftly and hard. “I’ll see you at the altar.”
As if she’d been waiting for a cue, Hallie came through the door. With a final wave and a smile, she and Tanner crossed the street and drove off in the lavender Cadillac.
Life with Tanner surely would be fun, Amanda thought. Her brave smile was sad around the edges as she went back into her shop.
Maxine was standing beside a brass hat rack near the window. “That was the most romantic proposal I’ve ever seen. Imagine proclaiming his love with the whole town as witnesses.”