by T. K. Chapin
“I don’t… Why do you need them? It’s going to be blistering hot today, I’m just rolling my sleeves up.”
“Oh, you can do that?” He asked with a surprised expression on his face.
I forgot that Chris hadn’t had much experience with church. He just knew that people dressed up and went on Sunday. “The Pastor likes people looking sharp, but it’s not required, Bro.”
“Oh, I see,” He replied.
“Yeah, just skip the cufflinks,” I added.
“Okay,” he replied, heading back out of the bathroom.
While I shaved, I thought about seeing Ally again. I needed to find the forgiveness in my heart for her in order to move forward. Jesus died on the cross and our sins were all washed away. So many sins, so many wrongs, Jesus made all right on Calvary. This wrong doing, this sin, this situation paled in comparison to the mass amount of sins I had been forgiven of and I knew I needed to forgive her.
Grabbing my Bible off the bookcase in the living room, Chris and I headed out to my truck. As we got in, Chris said, “Dude I feel nervous.”
“What are you nervous about?”
“Going up in front of the Church and confessing Jesus to all those people.”
“It’s okay, man, it’s natural to be nervous. Pastor Johnny will do the talking for you.”
Nodding, he smiled. “That’s a relief. Do you think he’ll want to baptize me today?”
“Could be today, or a week or two away; just depends.”
“I see,” he replied. “I am sad I missed Dad’s. I wish he could be here for mine too.”
“Me too, Bro, me too,” I said, attempting to settle his nerves.
We arrived at the church the same time that Levi and Jess pulled in. As we got out of the truck, I saw Levi with a baby carrier in each of his hands. I smiled as I walked up to him and grabbed one of them. “Let me help you,” I said.
“Thanks,” he replied. “I’m glad you guys came.”
“I’m going to make it a habit again,” I replied as we walked up the sidewalk to the church.
Chris added, “Me too! I need this.”
“Grats on your decision by the way,” Levi said to Chris. “It’s been a long time coming. I meant to say something earlier, but you know how bucking bales can be, exhausting!” He laughed.
“Thanks, bud,” Chris replied.
Coming inside, we dropped the babies off in the nursery and took our seats in the sanctuary. Roy soon arrived and sat on the other end of the pew next to Jess and Levi. Just as we stood for the first song, Ally came and sat next to me in the pew. I couldn’t help but smile inside and out as she joined my side. While I was apprehensive about her, I couldn’t help myself from enjoying her presence. I greeted her with a smile as she sat her purse down and picked up a hymnal.
“Sorry, Olivia was having issues finding a pair of tights,” she whispered into my ear.
“It’s all good. You made it, that’s what counts,” I replied.
We continued to worship through praise songs until the pastor took the pulpit and preached.
“Today, our reading comes from Matthew Seventeen, Twenty. ‘And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.’ Let’s pray.”
After a short prayer, he continued as he stepped down the steps to meet his congregation at eye level. “We live in troubling times. Yes, this is true. And if you talk to any number of Christians out there today, you get the feeling a good percent is looking up at the sky, just waiting for Jesus to come back. That’s not a bad thing, but it is not that good of a thing, either. We are called to be Christ-like and Christ-minded individuals. Let me ask you this, did Jesus focus his entire purpose on dying on Calvary’s cross? Or did he live his life for others? He was out in the world helping and healing, not locked away in a house saying it’s almost over.”
Pastor Johnny clicked a button on a remote from his pocket and the lights dimmed as an image of a mustard seed came up on the wall behind him. “A mustard seed is small, and in our world today, the smaller something is, the less power it has. But this passage of scripture illustrates a very different picture. Something small, something insignificant to the world’s standards can be something, in fact, huge.” He clicked the button again to project an image of a giant mustard tree.
“God can take our mustard-seed faith and, if we are willing, allow us to live extraordinary lives. Look at the scripture again. It says, ‘nothing shall be impossible unto you.’ What’s that mean to today’s Christian?” He paused as he walked across the front to the other side. “Personally, I’m looking forward to Heaven and the afterlife, but until I get there, I want to live this life and enjoy the blessings God so desperately wants me to enjoy. He wrote the Bible for our instruction on how to live this life. And while things in this world are evil, it’s not news. Give Paul, for instance. He lived in a time where they were executing Christians for their belief. Sound familiar?”
The pastor continued his message on faith until we finished with a Bible verse that summed up his point. “John sixteen, thirty three, ‘These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.’ You see,” he said as he closed his Bible back up at the pulpit. “The world might be crazy and unpredictable, but it’s through God’s promises in His Word we lean on. If you only have faith as a mustard seed, God can help you through anything and everything that might come your way. Let’s pray.”
Closing the message out, he asked for anyone to come forward who would like to accept Jesus into his heart. I leaned over to Chris and told him to go talk to the pastor about being baptized. He nodded, and exited the pew up to the front. Watching as he walked up there, I smiled. My brother’s soul was secured and his eternity with it. I had worried about him for years and always dreamed of the day he would accept Jesus into his heart. Now he was going forward and following in obedience with being baptized, and I couldn’t be more proud.
The pastor prayed with him and then talked with him until he had Chris take a seat on the front pew. Others came to the front and kneeled down to pray at the steps. After the music finished, the pastor went back up the steps to his pulpit.
“Today, we have a young man, Chris Holden, who gave his life to Jesus on a road trip back from Lincoln City.” He motioned for Chris to come up. And as Chris walked up, the pastor continued, “His father, Frank Holden, accepted Jesus later in life and just recently passed away earlier this year. I knew him personally and will miss him.
We will be doing baptisms the last weekend in June outside in the back of the church, for anyone who might want to join us. That’s the twenty sixth of this month I believe; right Jerry?”
Looking over in the congregation, I saw an older man nod and say, “Yes, Pastor, that’s right.”
The pastor smiled. “Thank goodness God gives so many people to help his Church! I’d be lost without all the help.” He smiled warmly. “Anyway, help me welcome Chris to the family of God by coming by after this last song and shaking his hand up front here.”
As the music wrapped up, a line stretched around the entire sanctuary of God’s people going up front to congratulate Chris on his decision to accept Jesus into his heart. We all joined the line and made our way up to him.
“I’m proud of you,” I said, shaking his hand. He grabbed me for a big hug and I smiled.
“Thanks for always being there for me. I wouldn’t have ever come around to Jesus if it wasn’t for you pushing it over all the years… and for the example you led.”
“It was all God, Chris, not me. But I’m glad you came around. I’m heading over to Roy’s to help move some stuff for Ally. Did you need a ride home?”
Roy said from behind, “I’ll give you a ride, Chris.”
“Okay,” Chris r
eplied, smiling.
Patting him on the back, I said, “There ya go.”
The sun was warm as we began loading the back of the trailer at Roy’s farm in front of the house. Ally might have not brought much with her from Atlanta, but she sure had accumulated a lot since she had been in Chattaroy. Sammy and Olivia were looking bored as they sat over at the picnic table watching Ally and me load boxes onto the trailer. I stopped to take a break and sat down at the picnic table. Taking a drink of my ice water, I looked at Sammy and Olivia.
“You guys want the gift I was going to give you once you got moved in?” I asked.
“Yeah!” Olivia shouted excitedly. Her eyes were wide. “What is it?”
“Yeah!” Sammy said.
“Let me go get it,” I replied. The other day when I was in Spokane, I saw a slip-and-slide just like the one my dad made Chris and me. I immediately thought of Sammy and Olivia. They’d love it and it was long enough to stretch it down to the lake just like we did so many years ago.
Pulling the slip-and-slide box out from the back of my truck, I was surprised when Adam pulled into the driveway. What was he doing here? I thought he went back to Atlanta, weeks ago. He got out of his car and looked at me, “Hey, who are you?” he asked.
“I’m Dylan,” I replied. “You’re Adam, right?” I asked, approaching him with an extended hand.
He shook my hand firmly, “Oh yeah, you’re Ally’s friend, right?”
“Yep,” I replied. My heart was racing as I worried what he had come back for.
“Yeah, I saw you at that barbeque thing…” He eyeballed the slip-and-slide tucked under my arm. “You aren’t trying to get with my wife are you? Because I’ve been with her for years, man, and I’m Sammy and Olivia’s dad. You can’t win this,” he said.
“Win? I’m not trying to play a game here.”
“Why are you buying my children gifts?”
“I thought they’d like it,” I replied.
I began walking back towards the house and he followed behind me. Upon approaching, the children came running and screaming. “Daddy!” He smiled over at me and gave me a nod. Ally came out from inside and up to me looking surprised.
“I had no idea he was coming, Dylan,” she said. Glancing at the slip-and-slide, she asked, “Is that for the kids?”
“Yeah, Chris and I had one out at the inn… we set it up to go into the lake. It was fun.” I handed it to her. “I thought they might enjoy it here while we continued loading the trailer, but it looks like they might be a little pre-occupied.”
She looked over at them and smiled. “They do love their Daddy.”
Nodding, I said, “We should keep moving and get this wrapped up.”
“Are you sure you want to stay? I’d hate for it to be awkward with Adam. He can be kind of a jerk.”
“I’m fine to stay and help if that’s okay with you. We are almost done here anyways.”
“Yeah,” she replied. I could tell she felt uncomfortable with the situation. She looked hesitant to go greet Adam.
“Go ahead,” I said. “Don’t act differently because of me being here, Ally. We’re just friends.”
Her lips perched as she nodded and headed over to Adam and the kids. They were a family and I didn’t want to come between them if that’s what Ally wanted. Continuing inside, I grabbed more boxes and continued loading the trailer. As I set more onto the trailer, Adam approached me.
“Need some help?”
I didn’t want or need his help, but I didn’t want to be rude, for Ally’s sake. “Sure, that’d be nice if you helped. There’s a dresser inside that needs moving.” I smiled and walked with him inside.
“Sorry about earlier out in the driveway,” Adam said. “I’m just protective of my family, you understand.”
“Yeah, I get that. I have a brother I’m protective of,” I replied.
“Cool, where’s he? And where’s Levi? Shouldn’t they be helping too?” he asked, grabbing a side on the dresser.
Grabbing my side of the dresser, I lifted and replied, “Levi and Jess are at a friend’s house and my brother is at home. It’s not a big deal they aren’t helping, we didn’t ask them since there wasn’t too much stuff.”
“We?” he asked as we moved the dresser out to the trailer.
“Yeah, Ally and I…”
He gave me a sideways look, I could tell he was trying to figure out if there was something going on between Ally and me. “You have any interest in my wife, Dylan?” he asked as we set the dresser up on the trailer.
Glancing over to her in the yard with the kids my heart felt like it skipped a beat. I said, “We’re just friends right now. Aren’t you two divorced, anyways?” I asked.
“Yeah, she divorced me, but I plan on getting her back. And last time I was here she thought the same.”
“Oh,” I replied. I couldn’t help feeling a bit disappointed in the fact he was trying to get back with Ally. But if what Ally said was true the other day at the inn, I had nothing to worry about.
“You’ve got to understand, I’ve been with her for six years. That’s not something that a piece of paper can tell us is over. I want my family back.”
“Yeah, whatever Ally wants to do, I support,” I replied. “Right now we’re just friends anyways, so do what you need to do.” I was trying to soften the awkwardness that Adam was bringing to the conversation.
We continued loading the trailer until everything was ready to go. Ally asked me to join her in Roy’s work truck that was towing the trailer as the kids piled in with Adam into his car. As we pulled out onto Elk Chattaroy Road, Ally turned to me.
“What were you and Adam talking about?” she asked.
Shaking my head, I said, “Nothing really… he just told me he was trying to get you back.”
“Oh…” she replied softly. “I don’t want to be with him, Dylan.”
“I know, that’s what you said the other day.”
“Do you believe me, though? You’ve been acting a little strange since he showed up.”
“Yeah, I believe you. But I do worry a little; you just have a big history with him. I have been acting strange because it’s uncomfortable having him around. I know that’s wrong of me, since Olivia and Sammy are his kids, but I just don’t like the guy. I don’t know how else you would expect me to act, honestly.”
“Yeah, it is awkward and I understand that. But you need to know I have no interest in him.” She paused. “I hope you can believe that.”
I nodded. “I do, but don’t forget that right now we’re just friends Ally. If you do want to pursue him, go for it. I don’t want to come between you and your family if that’s what you want.”
She frowned a little at my words, but said, “Friends or not, I’m waiting for you and you alone, Dylan. I don’t care about Adam anymore. If he wants to see his kids, great, if he’s honestly here for me, then he needs to not be around.”
Nodding at her we continued the drive in silence, both lost in our thoughts.
Arriving at the Silverback, we unloaded the trailer into the two different cabins she’d be staying in and then I was on my way. Adam hadn’t left by the time I was heading out, but there wasn’t much I could do. I hated leaving Ally there with him, but I had to force myself to trust her. There wasn’t any way I could stay and babysit her and him; I had my own life. Seeing her and him talking in my rearview mirror as I left the Silverback, I said a prayer that God would give me the peace of mind I needed.
CHAPTER 17
June 22, 2011
Pouring myself a cup of coffee the next morning, I heard the front door begin to open. Startled, I spilt my coffee a little as I set it on the counter and reached for the closest thing to defend myself with, a broom. Carefully I made my way from the kitchen into the living room with my weapon in hand, ready to defend myself as the door handle jiggled open. To my surprise, it was Chris. He erupted in laughter when he saw me with the broom in hand.
“Were you really going t
o beat someone with a broom?” he laughed, shutting the door behind him.
I set the broom against the wall and sighed with a relief. “I was ready to,” I replied. “Where were you? It’s five in the morning, Brother. I figured you were upstairs sleeping.”
“I was out with Elly all night,” he replied. “And don’t worry; we were just up talking about everything.”
“Oh, really?” I said over my shoulder as I went back into the kitchen to grab my coffee. He followed behind me, grabbing his own cup out of the cupboard.
“Yeah man, we’re getting back together… she is really interested in God after seeing how big of change I had in my life.”
Nodding, I replied, grinning, “That’s good.”
He poured himself a cup of coffee and added some creamer. “I’m really happy about it. I had no idea how much good having God in your life could bring.”
“God is good,” I replied. “This world is the closest to hell we’re ever going to get, and even if it’s hard sometimes, God is with us to help along the way.”
“Amen to that,” Chris replied with a smile. Glancing over at the clock on the kitchen wall, he continued, “I better try to get in an hour or two nap before I go buck bales again.”
“You stayed up all night, knowing you have to work?”
He smiled. “It was worth it, man… Today when I’m dead tired, it’ll serve as a constant reminder of how amazing last night was.”
“Wow, that good?” I replied.
“Yeah, and the best part was there was no sex or drinking involved. It was just me and her connecting on an intimate level that we never had connected on before.” Looking at the clock again, he dumped his coffee out in the sink and began leaving the kitchen. “Good night, Bro or morning, or whatever…” He laughed a little as he walked out of the room.
Smiling as he left the kitchen, I thought of him and Elly getting back together and it warmed my heart. He was finally getting his life on track. It was a little sad it took the death of our father and our mother re-abandoning us to do it, but that showed me how awesome God is and how he can work the hardships in our lives into something beautiful.