“Ugh,” she groaned out loud, “leave it to you to be interested in the one person who wants to keep it platonic.” The realization that she was interested in Tess brought a ball of nerves to the pit of her stomach. Not only was what they had risky because of Tess’s rocky relationship with her ex, there was also Ali to consider. Courtney smiled, thinking of the ball of blonde curls. I’ve spent my entire life day to day, today is no different, she thought. She pulled into the parking lot at the store. “What we have right now is good, and it is enough,” she said out loud and made her way inside to get the ice cream.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Courtney tucked Ali in between her stuffed Panda and a small tiger cat. Ali had fallen asleep on her lap during the last half hour of Lady and the Tramp, but they had watched it until the end before putting Ali in bed. She studied her face, seeing a lot of Tess in it and thought they were both beautiful.
Tess watched her from the doorway. She had finished cleaning up the ice cream bowls and popcorn kernels and had found Courtney kneeled beside her daughter’s bed, tucking her hair behind her ear. She thought it was one of the sweetest things she had seen in a long time. “I think I’m falling for you.” She whispered the words and immediately covered her mouth, realizing she had said the words out loud when Courtney looked startled and turned to look at her.
Courtney froze, kneeling on the little girl’s floor, staring at a tall, beautiful blonde woman who looked as if she wanted to swallow her tongue. She thought about responding, but judging by the look on Tess’s face, decided she shouldn’t. Instead, she stood and walked across the room towards the woman and whispered, “Did you say something?”
Tess, still covering her mouth with her hand, shook her head no. Realizing she still had her hand over her mouth, she rolled her eyes, removed it, and cracked the door behind her, following Courtney to the living room. She watched Courtney check her phone and frown.
“Everything alright?” Tess wondered what call she could be waiting for this late at night.
Courtney nodded, still frowning. “Yeah.” She held up her phone and shook her head, unsure. “My brother, he was supposed to meet my dad and I for dinner. I knew he wouldn’t show, but I still haven’t heard from him, and it’s unusual for him to blow me off for so long.” Courtney thought about the last time she had heard from her brother. The night before last, before he went out. He didn’t come home that night. “Sorry, it just, makes me nervous.”
Tess nodded, understanding and picked up her phone. “Chris? That’s his name right?”
Courtney nodded, “Christopher.”
Tess dialed the number for work and asked for one of the charge nurses. “Hey, Katie, can you look up a name and tell me if he’s in the system. Sure.” She nodded at Courtney. “Yeah, Christopher Anderson. 48 hours. Okay, thanks Katie.” Tess clicked the end button on her phone and shook her head at Courtney. “He isn’t in the system for the last 48.”
Courtney grinned. “Thank you. You look pretty hot and all professional with your little cell phone there.”
Tess blushed. “You can’t imagine the number of times as a child my mom called the hospitals to check on my sister and me because she couldn’t get ahold of us the first time she tried. I didn’t understand her panic until Ali was around four. I had a bad dream the night before that she was in an accident. Brad was supposed to have her here at three and at four, I was calling the hospitals.” She sat down on the couch and motioned for Courtney to sit as well. “Turns out, they were just stuck in traffic, and then he took her for ice cream. I don’t think I’ve ever yelled at someone so much and profusely apologized to them with the same breath. Poor Brad just stood there and took it and then gave me a hug!”
Courtney laughed at Tess’s admission and thought about the woman and her ex. “You two seem to have such a good relationship, it must be so great for Ali.”
Tess nodded. “It is, it’s great for both of us. I guess it isn’t something I’ve ever really thought about actually.” She shrugged, “It’s just the way we are.”
Courtney thought about her own parents. “Well she will appreciate it later, trust me.”
Tess remembered that Courtney had dinner with her father. “Are your parents separated?”
Courtney thought about her parents again. “Separated doesn’t really begin to describe them.” When she had paused for a moment, she realized that Tess was still looking at her, waiting for her to elaborate. “You don’t want to hear about it.”
“Oh, come on,” Tess pleaded, “you hardly ever talk about yourself or tell me anything good. Tell me something personal and messy.”
Courtney didn’t know why, but she suddenly heard herself talking about her parents. “Well personal and messy is exactly what they are. Don’t judge me,” she warned, raising her eyebrows at Tess banefully so she knew she was serious about the judgment.
“I won’t, I promise.” Tess made an x across her heart and giggled when Courtney rolled her eyes.
“Well, my mother left my father when I was about six. Chris was four, and she packed up our stuff one day, put me in the car, and left. Chris was home alone when my father got out of work, and we were gone.” Courtney watched Tess cover her mouth with her hand in shock.
“He was only four?”
Courtney nodded. “That isn’t the half of it. We stayed in shelters for a few weeks. She told everyone who would listen that my father had abused us and she was trying to make a safe getaway.” An image of her mother flashed in her mind. The face was blurry now, it had been so long since Courtney had seen her mother that she had a hard time picturing her face. “When my father finally found us at one of the shelters, he walked in, picked me up, and tried to leave with me, without a word to my mother. The staff at the shelter called the police, and they arrested him.”
“What about your mom? She left your brother home alone…”
Courtney nodded again. “My father never reported it. He never said anything while he was in jail either. They arrested him, and he sat there, waiting. They gave me back to my mother, and she told me I had to go to court and tell them what my dad had done to us, but the kicker was, he never laid a hand on us. She made up the whole thing.” When Tess gasped, Courtney kept talking. “They put me up on a stand in court, my father was at one table and my mother at the other. I remember the looks on their faces. My mother was smirking, the whole time. My father looked like he had been crushed. When the lawyer asked me questions, I told the truth. I also told the judge that my mother had left my baby brother home alone and asked if he was okay. The judge threw the case out and let me go home with my dad”
“Oh, my gosh, Court,” Tess reached over and curled her fingers into Courtney’s. “That must have been terrible.”
“When I got home, Chris was there, and his hand was all bandaged. No one knows what happened to him. When my dad got home, the night my mother took me, he had a gash on his hand and he was locked in the bathroom, bleeding all over. He still has a scar there. My mother sued Dad for custody, but he buried her in legal fees. I never saw her again.” When she noticed the tears in Tess’s eyes that mirrored her own, she chuckled uncomfortably. “Don’t look at me like that.”
Tess squeezed Courtney’s hand a little tighter. “I’m not looking at you like anything. It’s just a sad story.”
Courtney nodded, realizing that she had never talked to anyone about what she had just told Tess, not even with Chris, and wondered what it was about the woman that made her feel so comfortable. “I just picture the look on Chris’s face the day we walked out the door…” She swallowed hard. “Okay, Your turn. Tell me something personal and messy.”
Tess chuckled and pursed her lips, thinking hard about different happenings in her life. “I don’t have anything. Nothing that tops that. Not fair to pull the big guns out first, you could’ve at least given me a fighting chance!”
Courtney laughed. “I’m great at parties. Enter me in the screwed-up childhood contest and I’ll cl
ean house every time. Come on, you have to have some deep, dark, secret.”
Tess thought about her childhood. “I grew up with my mom and my sister, saw my dad on weekends. I have two step-brothers I don’t really know. My dad, his wife, and kids are very… Republican…” Tess cracked a smile when Courtney laughed. “My dad stopped talking to me when I got pregnant with Ali. He thought I should marry Brad or have an abortion. I was an abomination to their church getting pregnant and having a baby without marriage.”
Courtney lifted Tess’s hand and traced the outer edge of her thumb nail. “Having a baby outside of marriage…” She lifted an eyebrow. “That’s why you’re an abomination?”
Tess looked up with a smirk on her face. “Right? Wait until he finds out I’m gay!” she chuckled to herself and watched as Courtney followed the line of her fingers, tracing the outer edge of each one.
“So he doesn’t know?” Courtney finished the last finger and looked up at Tess. “Does anyone in your family know?”
Tess nodded. “My mom, my sister, some of my immediate family, a few close friends, and Brad. I stopped talking to my father before Ali was born, so the conversation has never come up.” Tess tilted her head in thought. “Actually, the conversation has never really come up with anyone. My sister caught me with my ex, and that spread to my mom and immediate family. We’re close, so that’s how it works.” She shrugged. “I guess maybe Brad, but we have a child together so… yeah.” She looked at Courtney again. “Does your family know?”
Courtney laughed. “Everyone I know knows. I’m me, I’ve never really been any different. My brother and I were fighting over girls in high school. My dad pretends I’m not, but he knows. It’s just less messy not to talk about it.”
Tess nodded and laughed a little before responding. “My mom is the same way. She was upset when she found out. Not because she had a gay daughter, but because she thought I would have a more difficult life and she didn’t want me to have a difficult anything.” Tess snickered again. “She always tells me she is going to find me a nice boy.”
Courtney nodded. “Sounds like you have a good family.”
Tess nodded and mulled over the thought. “I really do.” She thought about the conversation she had with Ali that day and how accepting her family had always been. Seems like the only one who has a problem with who I am is me. Tess looked at the woman sitting in front of her, and her heart fluttered. “What about your family? Do you want kids?”
Courtney suddenly felt like she was taking a test that she was about to fail. “I’ve never really thought about it.”
Tess looked at Courtney questioningly. “Really?”
“Yeah, I mean, there aren’t any little kids in my family. Most of my friends don’t have kids. I’ve never really been around them or been in a place where I would’ve considered having them. Is that weird?”
Tess tipped her head in thought. “It’s a little weird.” She laughed when Courtney opened her mouth widely.
“Hey now.”
She laughed again and responded. “You’re just so good with Ali. You seem like a natural.” She took Courtney’s hand again and continued running her fingertips on the back of Courtney’s hand, feeling a flutter in the pit of her stomach with each touch. “I’ve always wanted kids. I didn’t expect to have one when I did, but I’m glad I did.”
Courtney shook her head. “She is definitely a great kid.” She jumped when she felt her cellphone vibrate in her pocket, having been focusing a little too intently on the way Tess’s fingers were tracing her own. She looked at Tess before pulling it out. “I just need to check and see if it’s Chris.”
Tess nodded in understanding.
“I’m fine. Talk later.” She rolled her eyes. “Jerk.” She noticed the time on her phone and stood. “I didn’t realize it had gotten so late. I should probably get going.”
Tess frowned, the thought of Courtney leaving left her with an empty feeling. “What are you going to turn into a pumpkin if you stay out late?”
Courtney grinned. “I’m not a carriage. The carriage turns into a pumpkin. Pay attention.” She put her cell phone back in her pocket. “It’s late, and with your hours and Ali getting up in the morning, I just figured you need some sleep.”
Tess rolled her eyes, appreciating the fact that Courtney was constantly being so considerate about her sleep, but starting to feel like she was being tucked in with a glass of water and a kiss on the forehead. “You know,” she stood up and hooked her fingers into the belt loops on either side of Courtney’s hips. “Sometimes I do other things… besides sleep.”
She pulled Courtney close to her and pressed their lips together, parting Courtney’s delicately to tease her with her tongue. She nipped at Courtney’s bottom lip and took a step back. “Then again, I guess if you’re tired…” She feigned a long yawn and stretched her hands dramatically above her head and looked at Courtney mischievously, challenging her with her eyes.
Courtney watched Tess’s production, enjoying the way her lean form stretched when she put her arms above her head. She melted at the twinkle in the woman’s eyes. She told herself she was falling for Tess, and probably shouldn’t stay, but she also knew she didn’t want to leave. She thought about what Tess had said earlier in Ali’s room and found herself taking a step forward.
Something about the look in Courtney’s eyes had Tess’s stomach flipping. She was beginning to love the way that she felt when Courtney looked at her. She loved the way her stomach flipped and the fluttering she felt that made her catch her breath. She loved the powerful way she felt, knowing that she had Courtney by the look in her eyes. The look that said if Tess didn’t move fast, Courtney might devour her piece by piece. She smirked before turning to walk down the hallway, calling over her shoulder “you can let yourself out.” She had taken two steps into her bedroom when she heard the door latch behind her and the smirk was on her face again.
She turned around, still smirking to meet Courtney’s gaze. “Decided to stay after all?”
“Mmmhmmm,” Courtney murmured, mimicking Tess’s usual purr, and pushed Tess gently against the wall behind her, leaning in to kiss her deeply.
Tess groaned in appreciation when she felt the full length of Courtney’s body up against her. Her entire body was on fire, and Courtney’s kiss didn’t linger long. While Tess was catching her breath, Courtney knelt and pulled Tess’s pants to the floor. Before Tess could open her mouth to speak, her lacy underwear met her pants, and she felt Courtney’s tongue driving into her wetness. Her mind exploded.
Courtney’s tongue slid, teasing every inch of Tess’s throbbing warmth. Just when Tess’s breath was coming in spurts, and she thought Tess was about to go over the edge, she pulled back and stood up, meeting Tess’s look of shock with a smirk of her own. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me. I am feeling kind of tired now. Maybe I should go?”
Tess struggled to catch her breath and clear her mind. Her head, along with the rest of her, felt like it was about to explode, and she struggled to get her eyes to focus. When they did, she found Courtney’s mouth, inches from her own and cursed at the woman for stopping. “That,” she stammered between breaths, “was just mean.” When Courtney’s eyes seemed to twinkle, Tess reached up to pull the woman’s mouth to her own. When she had the woman’s full attention, she moved her backwards and helped her out of her clothes, kissing the woman’s ribcage as the shirt went over her head.
Though Courtney’s entire body throbbed, she didn’t want Tess to think she had the upper hand. When Tess lifted her own shirt over her head and her body stretched again, Courtney nearly moaned at the sight. When the shirt hit the floor and their gazes met again, Courtney willed herself to look arrogant. “You sure you aren’t tired?” She felt Tess’s hand sliding low and couldn’t contain the moan that slipped through her lips when Tess whispered in her ear.
“No, but you’re going to be.”
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Courtney woke up th
e next morning, and true to Tess’s word, she was exhausted. She wasn’t sure what time the two of them had finally passed out, but it seemed like it had been only minutes before she had woken up. The clock on the end stand didn’t agree, and she groaned, willing her eyes to stay open. They finally obeyed when they met the form lying beside her. She tipped her head to kiss the woman’s shoulder lightly and couldn’t help but smile. She let her lips linger for a minute and murmured, I think I’m falling for you too, into the delicate skin before pulling her lips away. She cursed when she heard a sound in the hallway and realized neither one of them had remembered clothing. Ali.
She scanned the room for her clothes and was pulling the last article over her head in record time when she opened the bedroom door and scanned the hallway for the little girl. Instead, she found a tiny ball of fur smacking at a toy mouse. “Oh! So you’re the culprit.” She scooped up the kitten and looked in on Ali. Satisfied that the girl was still asleep, she made her way to the kitchen to find the coffee. She opened the cupboard above the coffeepot and stared in awe at the eight different bags of coffee that sat on the shelf. “Oh, sweetie… you have a problem.” She chuckled quietly to herself, wondering why one person needed so much coffee. After a minute of looking at the different bags, she finally just pulled a random one off the shelf. She was filling the coffeepot with water when she turned, hearing Ali behind her. “Hey, kiddo. Good morning.”
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