On the third night, she didn’t even try. There had been a message on her machine from Amber when she had gotten home, enticing her to come out with the girls and letting her know where they would be that night. Courtney had talked to Jasper for a few minutes, and after realizing that aside from her brother, the only conversations she seemed to be having lately were with her dog, had decided she needed to get out of whatever slump she was in and had gotten ready and left.
She circled the bar a third time and sighed, finally pulling into a parking spot. You aren’t going to get Tess off your mind if you stare blankly at nothing for the rest of your life. She checked her reflection in the mirror before heading inside. She was relieved that the bar was packed and found the girls quickly at the back table. Amber whooped when she saw Courtney and made her way quickly and clumsily around the table to hug her friend.
“You came!!”
Courtney hugged her friend tightly, noticing that the women around the table looked like they had already had a few drinks and decided tonight, she was going to join them. This is what I need, she thought. A night with my friends. She released her hold on her friend and sat on the open stool, “I’ve missed you guys.”
Twenty minutes later Courtney was walking through the ER doors with Amber and her mangled wrist in tow. She took her friend to the registration desk and listened, amused, as Amber rambled on to the man at the desk about how she was a cheerleader in high school and she could’ve done the handstand if there weren’t a table in the way. So much for a few drinks and some meaningless conversation, she thought as they sat down in the waiting room and waited to be called back. She wondered if Tess was working and couldn’t decide whether she was relieved or disappointed when they were called back to a room by a nurse she didn’t recognize.
She sat in the chair next to the ER bed that her friend was sitting in and waited while the nurse examined Amber’s wrist and told them it was probably just a sprain, but they wanted to x-ray it anyways. When the nurse left the room, Amber sat back on the bed and looked at her friend apologetically, giggling. “Having to explain to someone that I’m thirty-five years old, got drunk, and tried to do a hand stand, is less funny and more embarrassing as my buzz wears off.”
Courtney smirked at her friend and used her phone to snap a picture of her in the hospital bed. “For tomorrow.”
Amber giggled again. “Come here,” she motioned for Courtney to lean on the bed next to her, “selfie with my lesbo-knight in shining armor.” She pulled Courtney’s cheek against her own and made a face as Courtney held up her phone and snapped the picture.
“Are you ready for your x-ray?”
Courtney froze, cheek pressed against Amber’s, when she heard the voice in the doorway.
“Yes! Let’s get this over with so my lover and I can get out of here.” Amber slid off the bed and winked at Courtney as she stood, giggling on her way out the door with the nurse. Courtney scanned Tess’s face for a reaction before she turned and followed Amber out of the room, but she didn’t see one.
Shit. Courtney sat back in the chair, wondering what Tess was thinking, and had to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. She had gone out with her friend to take her mind off of Tess, and her friend had brought her to the ER and flashed in Tess’s face that she was her lover. I suppose that is one way to get me off of her mind. She glanced at the door to the room and thought about the blank look on Tess’s face when she had walked out of the room behind Amber. Maybe the blank look is because she is back with her ex and doesn’t care if I have a lover. Maybe I’m already gone from her mind.
Courtney was still staring at the door when Amber returned a few minutes later with the nurse who had walked them back. She let them know the doctor would be in a few maters later with the x-ray and walked out of the room. Amber sat on the hospital bed and studied her friend’s face. “What’s going on between the two of you?”
Courtney’s head snapped up at Amber’s question. “Hmmm?”
Amber squinted her eyes at her friend and pointed. “I’m not that drunk, doll. You think I don’t recognize that nurse?” She leaned forward and lifted a leg to tuck it underneath her on the bed, her buzz having nearly worn off. “It took me a few minutes, but I’m pretty sure that’s the same girl from the bar that you left with last time we were out, and considering she barely spoke a word to me out there, I’d say there was a hint of jealousy at our selfie.” She studied her friend’s face and gave her a pointed look. “And since you don’t find this the slightest bit amusing, and instead of laughing, have resorted to glaring at the wall, I’m going to say she wasn’t a quick fling.”
Courtney met Amber’s look with a shrug and tried to brush off her friend. “It’s nothing. It’s complicated.”
Amber didn’t look away and instead smiled lightly. “Those are two very different answers, honey. Could it be that my little Lothario has finally fallen for a girl?”
Courtney rolled her eyes. “Let it go, Amber.” She opened her mouth again, but closed it when Tess appeared with a doctor and she listened to him explain to Amber that her wrist was just sprained and that he was prescribing her medicine for the pain. He handed Amber a prescription and assured her that she was in good hands with the nurse who would be wrapping her wrist. When he left the room, Courtney watched as Tess pulled some bandages out of the cupboard and turned her attention to Amber. She pulled a side table over to the bed and asked Amber to set her wrist on it so she could wrap it.
Amber lifted her wrist and winced at the pain before pulling it back again. She looked at Tess’s smiling face apprehensively and then at Courtney before deciding maybe she wasn’t sitting in the best possible place. “Alright, but before you touch my wrist, I think I should tell you that her and I…” she motioned towards Courtney, “are just friends, so you don’t have to be unnecessarily rough or anything. I’m a big fan of the male form.”
Tess chuckled, even as the jealousy she had been trying to suppress dissipated, and she reassured Amber that she would be very gentle, surprised that the woman sitting on the bed apparently knew who she was. When Amber continued to hesitate, Tess smiled warmly and patted the table. “I promise, I am very good with my hands.”
Amber grinned mischievously. “I would say ‘so I’ve heard,’ but I haven’t, so care to tell?” Relaxing a little, she laid her wrist on the table, wincing slightly when Tess lifted it to lay a splint underneath.
Tess raised her eyebrows and gave Courtney a sideways glance before reaching over to open a package of bandages and looked back up at Amber. “What would you like to know?”
Courtney stiffened a little with Tess’s words. She isn’t going to say anything.
Amber winced again when Tess lifted the splint to start wrapping, and deliberately avoided Courtney’s eyes, sure the woman was shooting daggers at her. “How long have you known each other? Where did you meet? Who broke who’s heart?” Amber finished with a grin.
Tess didn’t skip a beat and kept wrapping the woman’s wrist as she spoke. “We met when she fixed my computer for me. We’ve known each other a few months, and,” she tucked the end piece of the last bandage underneath Amber’s wrist, testing to make sure it was secure, “who broke who’s heart remains to be seen.” She looked up at Amber and smiled at the intrigued look on the woman’s face. “That should be good. I’ll send some fresh bandages home with you. I would keep it wrapped for three or four days and then follow up with your primary doctor.”
Courtney watched as Tess stood and pulled some fresh bandages out of the cupboard and handed them to Amber. She was becoming increasingly uncomfortable and irritated with Tess’s nonchalant attitude. Remains to be seen. Ha! She shot Amber a look that told her if she and her wrist knew what was good for them, they would be quiet, but sighed when her friend smirked at her.
“I like you, you should come out with us sometime. We have a blast.” She held her wrist up to Tess for emphasis, grinning and motioned towards Courtney. “Don’t let this on
e keep you hidden.”
“I’m not the one hiding anything.” Courtney grumbled in the two women’s direction just as another nurse walked in with Amber’s discharge papers. Courtney closed her mouth and reminded herself that this is where Tess worked and hoped her friend had enough respect to close her mouth as well.
Courtney thought she recognized the older nurse and was sure the nurse recognized her when she raised her eyebrows in Tess’s direction before handing the paperwork to Amber to sign.
“I would love that.” Tess smiled at Amber, not breaking their conversation with the older nurse’s intrusion. “Then again, that one over there,” she nodded her head in Courtney’s direction, “is going to have to stop being stubborn and realize she is as crazy about me as I am about her.” For the first time since Tess entered the room, she met Courtney’s eyes level, the challenge evident in her own.
Courtney pressed her lips tightly together, not wanting Tess to see the shock that she felt at the admission in front of Tess’s coworker. She told herself that the nurse was probably a close friend of Tess’s, but was still surprised at Tess’s brazen attitude. She stood silently, eyes locked with Tess’s, which continued to sparkle, refusing to be the first to look away. When the nurse cleared her throat and Tess still didn’t break her gaze, Courtney finally looked over. Realizing that both Amber and the older nurse were studying her intently, she shook her head and stood. “Sorry, did you say something? Are we all set here?”
Amber and the older nurse exchanged knowing glances before the older nurse turned and left the room, taking Tess with her. “What the hell was that?” Amber addressed her friend, her voice filled with disbelief and amusement.
“Let’s go.” Courtney reached over to take the bandages and discharge papers from the bed. They had taken four steps out of the room when Courtney heard Tess’s voice loudly behind her. She turned, just as Amber did, and saw Tess standing behind the nurse’s desk at the end of the hall, almost on the other side of the ER, with her hands on either side of her mouth so her voice would carry.
“I’m off at twelve if you decide you miss me, Court.” Tess paused for a moment, knowing by Courtney’s body language that she had accomplished what she was attempting, though she knew she wouldn’t admit it. She held her hands back up to her mouth, “It was nice meeting you, Amber.”
Not one to be challenged, Courtney decided since Tess had started it, she would play along. She held her hands up to her own face, mocking Tess’s exaggeration for loudness, “You couldn’t handle me, sweetheart.” She dropped her hands and started to turn, not waiting to see the embarrassment she was sure was creeping its way up Tess’s face and grinned to herself. That will teach her to be a smartass. She had taken one step and nearly tripped when she heard Tess call behind her.
“I think I handle you pretty well, sweetheart.”
She shot a sideways glance at Amber, who looked like she was on the verge of hysterics and muttered, “Shut it, Amber”, before making her way quickly out of the hospital.
Tess watched the two women leave and sat down in the chair behind her with a sigh. If Courtney didn’t want to see her because she wasn’t open and out there, she hoped she had just blown that defense to bits. She ran her hands through her hair, thinking about how good Courtney had looked, sitting in the ER chair and how difficult it was for her to remain calm and collected, and told herself well done for her nonchalant attitude.
Elsie leaned on the counter beside her and crossed her arms. “That was your brilliant plan?”
“What?”
“To embarrass both her and yourself where you work?”
Tess laughed. “Trust me, I did not embarrass her. If I did, it wasn’t because of what I said, it was because she thought she had me, and I gave it back to her. She doesn’t embarrass easily” Tess looked up at the older nurse’s unsure face. “I wanted to show her that I can be out there, and that I’m not going to… have a hidden life anymore.”
The older nurse made a sniffing sound and gave Tess a look that bordered on the line of understanding. “So it was some sort of lesbian romantic gesture.”
Tess threw her head back and laughed at the older woman’s attempt at being understanding. “Yeah,” she stammered through laughs, “something like that…”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Courtney paced back and forth between her living room and kitchen, her mind having not wandered from Tess since the moment she had seen her at the hospital. She knew that Tess’s display at the hospital had been for her benefit, but it bothered her regardless. She could’ve cared less that Tess was half in the closet, and it made no difference to her either way, she had simply thrown that at Tess because it sounded better than I’m jealous and you hurt me. So when Tess had yelled across the hospital, throwing Courtney’s complaint in her own face, it aggravated her that the woman had actually thought that was the reason she was angry.
She turned to pace back into the kitchen and ran into Jasper, who had been pacing with her, for the third time. “Sheesh, back up, pup, I’m going to run you over.” She ruffled his ears and continued pacing, not liking the quiet in the house. Since Chris had gotten his apartment and taken Carter with him, Courtney had suddenly become aware of every sound her house made. She had lived alone for years, but for some reason, the sudden lack of people in and out of her house had made her feel uncomfortable.
She had gotten used to the sounds of her phone chiming, of Ali and Jasper rolling around on the floor, of her nephew cooing, and of the random noises of living that her brother had made. She listened to the sound of Jasper’s toenails clicking on the hardwood floor behind her and frowned. She had missed the noise while in the hotel and had told herself that she just needed to be home, but now that she was home, she felt lonelier than ever. Damn you, Amber, she thought, damn you and your damn cheer-leading antics. She looked at the clock on the wall. She had been home for only fifteen minutes, but it felt like hours. She nearly jumped out of her skin when her phone chimed in the silence. She made her way to the kitchen and hit the button to view the message.
You’re going to have to forgive me eventually, because I miss you. I’m on my way home, goodnight, beautiful.
Courtney’s fingers tingled holding her cell phone, and she suddenly wondered why she was being so stubborn. I miss her, she told herself. Obviously she isn’t with her ex… She set the cell phone on the kitchen island and slid onto one of the stools, staring at her phone as if it were some code she was trying to decipher. So what happens next time…? She told herself she had no right to be angry to begin with because she and Tess had not been a couple, which meant Tess could come and go as she pleased. So what right do I have to be mad when she did just that? Courtney closed her eyes and tapped her finger on the island next to her phone. I was the one who broke the rule and told her I was falling for her. Then again, she did say it first… Courtney continued to tap her finger, telling herself that the admission from both sides should’ve changed the rules.
“Damn! I am an adult. We are adults. We can talk like adults. I can do this.” She picked up her phone and dialed Tess’s number, she picked up after the second ring.
“Hey, geek.”
Courtney had worked herself into such a bout of frustration that she huffed a mixture of laughter and nerves when Tess had greeted her in her usual way. “Are you busy? I thought we could talk.”
“Sure.”
Courtney pulled her keys off the island and made her way to the front door. “Okay, I’ll be there shortly.” She clicked the end button without saying goodbye and opened the front door to Tess, who was holding her cell phone up.
“Well, that was rude. You don’t even say bye?”
Courtney narrowed her eyes at Tess. “How long have you been standing there?”
Tess pursed her lips and looked around. “I was in the driveway for five minutes before I got out of the car. You took your sweet time deciding to talk to me.”
Courtney took a step back, her eye
s still narrowed, so Tess could walk past her. “I bet you think you’re so clever, don’t you? What if I had decided that I didn’t want to talk to you?”
Tess turned and shrugged, the look on her face telling Courtney the latter hadn’t been an option. “So, what did you want to talk about?”
Courtney closed the door behind her and allowed herself a moment to take a breath. “I don’t know…”
Tess crossed her arms over her chest, her eyes lit with amusement. “You call me at twelve-thirty in the morning to ask me to talk… but you don’t know about what?”
Courtney rolled her eyes and walked pass Tess and into the living room to sit on the couch. “It’s not like I pulled you out of bed, you just got out of work, and I would know what I wanted to say if I had the time to think in the car. Unfortunately, since you’re a stalker, I didn’t have time to think.”
Tess followed Courtney into the living room and sat on the opposite end of the couch. Courtney watched as Tess curled her legs underneath her. She swallowed when her heart started beating faster and she realized that this is what she had been missing; the casual way that Tess melted into her couch, their teasing, her eyes… For the first time since she had stepped off of the airplane, she felt like she was home.
“Ask.”
Courtney looked at Tess and then at the far wall, telling herself she didn’t know what Tess meant, but knowing in all reality that she did. “Ask what?”
“Ask.”
Her eyes met Tess’s and she sighed. “I don’t want to ask. I don’t want to know the answer. Can we just…I just want to go back to the way things were.” Courtney realized her eyes were almost pleading with Tess’s, and she looked down. She took a deep breath and jerked her head back up when Tess responded.
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