“Except you wouldn’t,” I said. “You’d fall on your own dagger before you did that.”
He whirled on me then, his eyes wild and angry. “You only think that because you still don’t see me as the assassin I once was. You weren’t there. You don’t know what I can do.”
In the distance came a long, low howl. Shivers danced along my skin as I swung toward the sound. It seemed like it was near the castle. Maybe just behind it, and coming closer with every passing beat. My heart flickered as I reached for my dagger and found nothing but air. I’d left it inside the living room when I’d been on my hunt to find Dorian.
“It’s another one,” Dorian said. “Get back inside the castle walls.”
“No,” I said. “I’m not leaving you out here to face it alone.”
“Go back inside,” he growled. “You’re not safe out here with either him or me.”
Ignoring his words, I crouched low and closed my eyes, willing my magic to come to my aid. It had helped me in the last fight. It would help me again. Even though I didn’t know the spells, it almost seemed to know instinctively what I needed it to do.
“I’m taking you back inside where it’s safe.” Dorian slung me over his shoulder, and I cried out in alarm as he began to run with his enhanced speed toward the castle. He charged inside and slammed the door shut before taking me up the stairs and depositing me in one of the bedrooms, straight onto the large bed. “You’re to stay here for the rest of the night. There’s no telling how many of them will come here looking for you. I’ll patrol until morning, and then we’ll figure out a way to get you back home.”
“A way to get me back? What about you?” Narrowing my eyes, I sprung off the bed and stalked to where he stood staring out the window.
“I’m staying here,” he said quietly. “It’s better for everyone.”
“No, it isn’t,” I said. “You can’t possibly believe that.”
“You can feel what I feel, Zoe. The bloodlust. It’s running through my veins and making me want things I never thought I would.” His jaw tightened as he swallowed hard. “It would only take one wrong second, one moment when I struggled to hold on, and that would be it.”
“Drink me,” I said, shifting closer to him. “You want to taste my blood that badly? Then, do it.”
“I can’t,” he said in a strained voice, though his eyes wandered across every inch of my neck. “If I start, I won’t be able to stop.”
“You will, because you would never hurt me.” I dropped back my head to expose my neck, and the vein throbbed painfully as my heartbeat picked up speed. “Now, have a taste of what you’ve been craving for so long.”
Through our bond, I could feel him struggle with his cracking willpower. He ached for my blood, just as I ached to have his lips on my skin. Though a small part of me felt fear for what he was about to do, I knew without a doubt that he’d stop before it all became too much. That was what he didn’t understand. I believed in him, even if he didn’t believe in himself.
With a growl low in his throat, his teeth nicked my neck. Sparks shot through my body, and my breath got caught in my lungs. There was something so intoxicating about his need, so much so that I yearned for his teeth to sink into my skin.
And then they did. Sharp and painful, his fangs split into the tender skin at the base of my ear. I cried out as spots danced in my eyes, but I clung on tight to his shirt instead of pushing him away. I wanted him to do this. Hell, I needed it. Because even though it hurt like hell, an intoxicating sensation poured through me. Adrenaline and magic and desire.
Moaning, I leaned into him as he drank from my neck. Hot liquid spilled onto my skin, stars dancing my eyes as the sharp pains began to turn into electric fire. My eyelids began to flutter, and my heart began to hurt. Dorian was drinking with great abandon, and for a moment, I was scared he wouldn’t stop.
With a growl, he yanked his teeth from my neck and jumped halfway back across the room. His eyes were wild, and his lips were painted red. For the first time since I’d met him, he looked like a vampire. A creature of darkness who stalked the night in search of an innocent’s blood. He swiped the back of his mouth across his chin and dropped his gaze to my neck.
As I reached my hand up to the wound, I found my fingers were too heavy to lift. With a sigh, I slumped back against the bed and winced. Nothing hurt exactly, but at the same time, everything ached to my bones.
“What’s happening?” I whispered.
He shook his head as his eyes widened even more. “I drank too much. I’m so sorry, Zoe. I let it get to my head, and I drank far too much.”
Before I could tell him that really, I was okay, things were just a little blurry, that was all, he’d dropped to his knees and ripped open his wrist with his impossibly sharp teeth. He pressed his open wound to my mouth, smearing his blood against my tongue. Murmuring against him, I drank and closed my eyes, enjoying the intoxicating taste of him. Everything about him consumed me, as if his very life-force had filled my soul.
I arched my back and opened my mouth, desperate to feel his body on top of mine. But then everything faded to darkness.
Chapter 17
Dorian sat on the edge of my bed, staring down at me as I woke with an ache that consumed my bones. Groaning, I shifted on the bed and reached up to touch my neck. The wound was gone, but I could feel the remnants in my every breath. I both felt very much alive as well as half-dead.
“You may be experiencing some residual soreness,” Dorian said in a low murmur. “I gave you enough blood to heal your wound and replenish your supply, but you ended up passing out.”
“Oh, I feel soreness alright. And not the good kind.” Grimacing, I pushed myself up from the bed and stared at the rumpled person in the mirror across from me. I looked like shit. There were purple bags under my eyes, and my hair was sticking out in every direction. No wonder Dorian hadn’t yet tried to seduce me.
“Unfortunately, I can’t let you rest much longer,” he said. “After some breakfast, we need to get to work.”
Shaking my head, I tried to blow away the cobwebs because I had absolutely zero clue what he was talking about. Last time I checked, we were stuck in a castle in the middle of Scotland, trapped until we could find a way home. “Work?”
“Training to do and spells to learn.” He held up the grimoire that Grams had gifted me with last year. I’d been keeping it in my bag for a rainy day. “I found a spell in here that’ll get you home, but it’s a pretty complicated one. It’ll take some time to get it right.”
Groaning, I flopped back onto the bed. Of course it would.
Dorian managed to whip up some eggs, bacon, and toast before leading me down into the lower depths of the castle. Unlike the Blood Coven’s headquarters, there were no prison cells or creepy dungeons to speak of. Instead, Dorian had hollowed out a large portion of the basement before stacking it full of various training equipment. There were exercise mats on the floor, as well as a weight machine and a treadmill. Various weapons lined the walls, everything from a scythe to a dagger even smaller than mine.
“This is pretty cool,” I said with an appreciative nod. “Too bad you can’t teleport this place back to Boston.”
He held up a finger and waved it once. “Don’t even think about it, Zoe. If we dropped this place in the middle of an American city, not only would it generate far too much of the wrong sort of attention, it would remove it from it’s natural surroundings.”
“You mean, the Nosferatu-infested, rain-drenched middle of nowhere?” I asked with an arched eyebrow.
His lips quirked. “Exactly. And that, Zoe, is part of its charm.”
“If you say so,” I said, though I actually did agree. Not that I would ever let him know that. As much as I’d love to have twenty-four seven access to this place, it just wouldn’t be the same if we plopped it into the middle of Fenway Park.
“Besides,” Dorian said. “If you nail that spell of yours, then you can come here as often as you please.”
That thought sent a thrill through me. The idea of having a secret hideaway where Dorian and I could come anytime we wanted? It sounded almost too good to be true. Not that it would end up leading to what I really wanted. He’d had me alone in this place for almost a day now, and he hadn’t tried to take things any further whatsoever. We’d even shared blood—again—but there was something else I wanted far more than that.
“I know what you’re thinking about, Zoe,” he said with a slight smile. “Don’t forget our bond relays a hell of a lot of information about your emotions, and it’s even stronger after last night.”
Face red, I glanced away. “Yeah, well. Right back at you, buddy.”
Right back at you buddy?! Why the hell had I said that? What a great way to get him to seduce me. Spout cheesy lines and hope the title of buddy would get him going. Rolling my eyes at myself, I pulled my dagger from my sheath and spun it once in my hands, watching the blade swirl in circles. There were quite a few things I was pretty good at. Breaking and entering. Stabbing things. Irritating the hell out of my enemies. One thing I certainly wasn’t good at though? Flirting.
“You know, I stopped last night because I didn’t want to hurt you,” he said in a low voice. “It wasn’t because the desire wasn’t there. It was because it was there too much. And look what happened. I drank far too much of your blood. So much that you lost consciousness.”
“You didn’t mean to,” I said.
“I didn’t mean to, but it ended up happening anyway,” he said. “This is what I mean, Zoe. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, physically or emotionally. And if I can’t trust myself to know when to stop, then well…”
My heart thumped hard. “Then, what? You’re going to stop training me? You’re going to just abandon me to my own devices? Find yourself another partner when all of this is said and done? Or stay here in Scotland hidden away from the world?”
“Of course not. I shouldn’t have said I would stay here alone,” he said, his frown turning to a scowl. “I would never abandon you like that. We’re a team. I’m just not sure it’s safe for you to be anything more to me than that.”
Hurt flashed through my gut at his words. Despite everything, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. Sure, we’d had our arguments in the past. We’d pissed each other off and hurt each other, and we’d both had moments when we weren’t sure just how much longer we could continue on. But so much had happened since then. We’d come out on the other side, stronger and closer than ever.
And there was no ignoring the obvious attraction between us. That was a genie that we couldn’t put back in the bottle, even if we both wanted to. And I sure as hell didn’t.
“So,” I said, forcing myself to speak the words without echoing my emotion with tears, “that’s it, then? Partners and nothing more. You don’t even want us to be friends.”
“That’s not what I said, Zoe, and you know it,” he said, squeezing his hands tight into fists. “I’m just saying I’m not sure it’s safe for me to express how I really feel about you. If I let myself give in again, there’s no telling what I might do.”
“Fine, then let’s get started on training, shall we?” I said, turning my back on him and stalking toward the wall where I hoisted the largest weapon into my hands. It was so heavy that I almost toppled sideways, but I caught my balance before I could fall. I met him in the middle of the mat, my entire body brimming with emotion. Not anger. Not fear. Just flat-out torturous pain.
“Zoe,” he started to say, but I lifted the scythe high in the air before he could say anything more.
“We need to train. Not talk.” Gritting my teeth, I hurled the weapon toward him, but it connected with the floor with a loud smack. The blade sunk into the mat, sticking into the thick material. I tried to hoist it back into my arms, but it wouldn’t budge. Trying with all my might, I pulled harder. Harder and harder until sweat popped out on my brow.
Dorian regarded me with a stony expression as he held the grimoire in the air. “Let’s focus on a different aspect of your training, shall we? Like the spell that will get us back home and not the murderous weapon you clearly can’t lift.”
“Whatever you say, partner.” I let go of the scythe’s handle and crossed my arms over my chest.
Sighing, he shook his head, but he merely turned the page to the spell before passing the book to me. The words were all in Latin, just like the rest of the book, which meant it might as well have been pure gibberish. I glanced across the page. No rune. There were a few vague drawings of smoke and fire, but none of it made much sense.
“You’re going to have to translate,” I said, hating that I needed his help with my own spells, especially when all I wanted in that moment was to show him up.
“The results of this spell are similar to the one the sun mages were using,” he began, “though you can’t take a building with you. And the mechanics are a lot different. The travel happens almost instantly instead of in real time.”
“So, it’s really not all that similar,” I said.
Sighing, he shut the book with a snap. “Listen, Zoe. I’m just trying to help. If you master this spell, we can go back to our lives in Boston.”
“Of course. No wonder you’re so keen for me to learn this,” I said, shaking my head. “The sooner we can go back to Boston, the sooner we can go back to the status quo. Right now, you’re stuck here in this house with me, and that’s the last thing you want. Isn’t it?”
“What I want is to keep you from getting hurt.”
Shaking my head, I backed away. “Too late.”
Despite my plan to shut myself inside the bedroom for the remainder of the day, my stomach betrayed me after several long hours, especially when the scent of roasting chicken inched its way up the stairs and underneath the cracks in the door. Sighing, I pushed myself off the bed to stare out at the waning light. Another day had passed, and we were still stuck in this castle. It wouldn’t be long before the Nosferatu began to stalk the grounds again, thirsting for a taste of shadow blood.
I really should have worked on that spell, but the pain of Dorian’s rejection had stung so terribly that I hadn’t been able to think of anything else. How could I train with him now? Knowing that he didn’t want me the same way I wanted him? I didn’t think I could be around him. But I also didn’t think I could not be around him either. Either option sounded like the purest form of torture there was.
“Hi,” I said when I slipped into the dining room. Dorian had set out a feast. Chicken, potatoes, roasted carrots, and a pot of gravy. All freshly cooked and glistening with perfection. My stomach growled so loud that it must have echoed across the plains. I hadn’t had any food in at least twenty-four hours, and I was absolutely starving.
“Sit,” he said, gesturing toward the chair at the head of the table. “You need to eat. Take this as my apology for upsetting you earlier.”
I sighed as I settled into the chair, feeling the slightest bit less hungry after his comment. “You don’t need to apologize, Dorian. It’s not your fault if you don’t reciprocate how I feel. I overreacted because…well, because I’m me. And that’s what I do sometimes. I should be the one apologizing.”
His eyes flashed. Taking my hand, he placed it on his chest as he sunk to his knees by my side. The need for him grew bright in my chest, and I had to swallow the lump taking form in my throat. This right here was why it hurt to be around him. To be so close and yet so far away at the same time.
“You think I don’t reciprocate?” He let out a light laugh and shook his head. “Oh, Zoe. You’ve misunderstood. Reach through our bond, open up your mind, and feel what I feel.”
Our eyes met, and a crushing weight pressed down on my heart. As much as we’d bonded through our shared blood, there’d been a wall I’d kept up between us. I hadn’t let myself fully open to the idea of experiencing the intense emotions of another being. Yes, I’d still been able to feel him there, but I’d tried my best not to drown under the overwhelming rea
lity of it all. Dorian was asking me to take down that wall and let him in like I’d never done before.
“You don’t need to be afraid of me, Zoe. At least not like this,” he said in a whisper, his dark eyes boring deep into my soul. “Let me inside. Let me show you who I am.”
Something churned in my gut. An emotion that I wasn’t quite ready to put a name to, one I’d never felt before in my life. With a deep breath, I nodded and felt my body relax its grip on the tight control I had on our bond. The second I let go, thoughts and emotions that were not my own flooded through me. There were so many, pouring upon me so quickly that all I could see and feel were momentary flashes before they were replaced with the next.
My own face flashed before my eyes, lit up in a smile. My head was dropped back, my mouth parted in a moan. And then it flipped to an image of me standing on a dirt mound, my body arched back with power radiating off my skin as I fought a Nosferatu with a ferocity I didn’t think I had.
This wasn’t reality. Or at least, not reality as I knew it. It was life according to Dorian. His memories, his thoughts. It was the way he saw me, in a way that was so different than the way I saw myself. It was Zoe according to Dorian, and it took my breath away.
Did he really see me like this?
The emotions came next. A mixture of fear and alarm when a Nosferatu rushed toward me. An intense feeling of pride when I struck it down. And then an intoxicating mix of desire and need and affection. Dorian’s heart beat hard in his chest, and my own heart answered. The two of us breathed in sync, our bodies coming together as one. And that was when I knew I truly had been wrong.
Dorian wanted me as much as I wanted him. The intensity of his feelings took my breath away.
When I finally opened my eyes, I found his face only inches from mine. He strained toward me while doing his best to hold himself back. “Do you see now, Zoe?”
Nodding once, I swallowed hard. “I see.”
Witch's Blade (The Bone Coven Chronicles Book 3) Page 11