Aland glared at her. “I can’t even eat in peace, or at least I couldn’t, until I tossed those two out. God’s teeth!” He took another bite of bread.
“What have we heard from Ulric’s kingdom?”
Aland chewed for a moment, and then swallowed. “I wrote to his father before I allowed him to accept the challenge. I told him that I would have no choice to go through with things if it all went poorly. I tried to give Ulric the chance to step down with no stain on his honor. Both assured me they understood. Not that it matters now, as I am receiving missives daily from his father.” He sighed. “Can we not just stop with the nighttime excursions, or whatever is going on?”
“I have nothing to tell you on that score, Father. I wish I did. You can always remove the challenge.”
“Not when there’s another contender.” He looked as gloomy as her sisters.
“Yes, although I am sure there is more.”
“There’s always more. Well, and there’s no help for it. Eat. Then you and I will try to sneak away so that we may have some peace in which to talk. I cannot tell you when I might get another chance. I have an emissary from the Empress of Samir asking for details on the challenge. I told you, she is well aware of what goes on in our court!”
“Mother made a good point.” Thea carefully picked at her food.
“Which was? Don’t be coy. Not today, Thea.”
“That we have not had to face much adversity until now. That you and she have been lucky. That perhaps these were our trials.”
Aland rubbed his chin. “She might have said such to me.”
“Did you listen?”
“Hush, girl.”
Thea changed the subject. “What has been done with Ulric?”
“His men will be taking him home to his father.” Aland’s face fell.
“I am sorry I was not there to pay my respects to him.”
Aland inhaled deeply. “You have already shown him respect, Thea. One of the things his father said was that he heard of your efforts to spare him, and that while he cannot forgive me, he is grateful for you behaving appropriately. I don’t like to admit it, but you were right.”
“Then let us stop this foolishness and end the challenge. Tell Casimir that he will not have to find out anything.”
“I cannot. I will look weak, as will Gallivas.”
“Father.” She took his hand. “I can’t lose Casimir. Ulric was bad enough. I cannot lose Casimir.”
“Then allow him to succeed.” Aland stood up, his anger back. He walked from the hall, his Council following.
Thea watched him walk away, stunned into silence. He thought she had something to do with this? In fairness, she did, but not whether a contender was successful. She’d tried all she could to wake him. She glanced out over the hall. Everyone she saw watched her. The expressions on the faces of the courtiers were mixed. Some showed pity, others a glee at the drama playing out in front of them. She looked away. She felt disgusted at them all.
***
Thea fled to her room after lunch. She hoped to have some quiet time. That hope ended when Isobel threw herself on the couch across from Thea.
“Are you happy now? Casimir has declared for you. Sebastian is furious. Will you leave any for the rest of us? Or will they all die hoping to gain your hand?”
Thea set down the embroidery she’d taken up to distract herself. “What do you want from me, Isobel? I did not ask Ulric to accept the challenge. I will not forgive myself for his death. Not ever. I certainly would not have encouraged Casimir had I known he considered this. It’s madness!” She looked up. Isobel didn’t answer, and Thea looked back at her. It wasn’t like Isobel to be silent.
“Did you encourage him?”
“As though a woman can influence a man’s decisions,” Isobel scoffed.
Thea rose and advanced towards her. “You did, didn’t you? You wouldn’t take my word for it. If you didn’t believe me, you ignored your sisters who said the same. You pushed him, hoping that if he did, he’d choose you!” She leaned down, raising her voice.
“Do you know what you’ve done, you selfish, selfish girl? You have doomed him! If we cannot ensure he stays awake, he will walk the same path Ulric just did! You don’t love him! You just want to win him, like a mindless child grasping for a prize that’s out of reach! If he dies, I will never forgive you, Isobel! Never, do you hear me?” She screamed the last in Isobel’s face, and then turned to the window.
Never before had she felt inclined to violence. Her hands shook. This was not love. Isobel wanted him, but she didn’t love him. If she did, she would not have encouraged him to take a path that might lead to his death. Or maybe she wanted to make sure that Thea couldn’t have him, and that she had to watch him die too.
“Have you nothing to say for yourself?” Thea hissed as she turned back to Isobel. Isobel hadn’t moved. Thea stood next to the couch, hands on hips. “Well?” She screamed the word.
Her screams had brought the rest of her sisters to the solarium.
“What is going on?” Sybbl reached them first, looking back and forth between them.
“Did you know that Isobel encouraged Casimir to take up Father’s stupid challenge? Did you know she told him to do it?” Thea glared around at all of them.
“No, surely not,” said Esmay. “Izzy wouldn’t. Would you?” She leaned down, putting an arm on Isobel’s shoulder.
“Oh, yes she did! She told me that a woman can’t influence a man’s decision, and has said nothing since! She doesn’t deny it! You’ve been calling me awful and hateful and selfish since I ran afoul of Catrin,” this directed at Isobel again. “But I have done all that I could to spare others from harm. I take responsibility for my actions, and I am trying to mitigate the damage my choices have caused. Can you say the same?”
Isobel mumbled.
“I did not hear you, dear sister. Please, speak up. Let us all hear you.” Thea strove to keep her hands at her side. She wanted to slap Isobel’s head from her shoulders.
“I said that Casimir wanted to do it.”
“And you didn’t point out that the last man who felt the same left our castle minus his head? Isobel, I am close to throttling you.”
Beatrix and Angharad stepped to either side of Thea and tried to gently lead her away. Thea shook off their arms. “Do not treat me as though I am a madwoman to be soothed! Isobel has endangered the life of the only man I will ever love! And for what? Because she wants him? Wants me to lose him? Neither are noble! Isobel! You will answer me!” Thea stalked back to where Isobel sat.
“He…he didn’t say much.” Isobel spoke quietly. “I sat with him the day Ulric died. I told him I was so sad that Ulric had not been successful. I started to cry.” She stopped.
“Go on.” Thea could see that Isobel was close to tears again, but she didn’t care. Isobel had no call on her sympathy at this moment.
“He offered me a handkerchief, and put his arm round my shoulders. I let myself cry. We were in the gardens, sitting a distance from the main path.”
“Of course you were.” Angharad laid a hand on Thea’s arm. Thea clamped her lips shut.
“I said that if there was not this horrible challenge, none of this would have happened. I stopped myself just in time, because I almost said something about Thea and how she brought the curse.”
Thea reached out and as quick as an adder-strike slapped Isobel’s face. “You arrogant, thoughtless little girl. If you had, you would have killed him. Immediately, if our past experience is anything to go on. Is there no end to your selfishness?”
Isobel held a hand to her face. “Perhaps when yours ends. It’s rather like the pot calling the kettle black for you to dare call my actions selfish!”
“No it is not! What have you done to make things better? Nothing. You encouraged him because you hoped he would choose you. You nearly told him about the curse in order to let him know that I am to blame for it. None of this was to make anything better, just to furth
er your own agenda. If he dies, Isobel, you are dead to me.” She pushed through her sisters and walked away. She walked to the doors and let herself out, slamming them behind her. Marek, as always, was near the door, and as she stormed down the corridor, he fell in behind her.
She went to the staircase she and Casimir had used to go to the woods. Marek made a noise of surprise. She said, “You were not aware of this stairway?”
“I was not aware you were, my lady.”
“I did grow up here, Marek.”
“Of course. Will you hold a moment, my lady?”
She stopped, and Marek took a torch from the wall and used it to light the torch at the top of the small stairway. He replaced the torch in the main corridor and then took the one off the wall and held it high, walking in front of Thea. She followed him, closing the little door behind her.
“We are taking this route for what reason?”
“I’m not fit for company, Marek. I am so angry that one cross word will send me into a towering rage, and I can ill afford to behave in such a way.”
“Is everything all right with your sisters?”
“None of them have come to harm at my hand, much as I might wish otherwise,” Thea muttered.
“I ask because I heard sounds of vigorous discussion before you came out.”
Thea burst out laughing in spite of herself. “I can see why you’ve been successful even at such a young age, Marek. That was most diplomatic. Yes, there was some vigorous discussion and for that reason, I am hoping to slip into the woods and calm my temper.”
“Very well. I see no concern as we are walking in the daylight.”
“The woods are safe even at night,” Thea said, thinking of the last time she’d been in them.
“Maybe,” Marek answered. “As long as one is not alone and does not get lost.”
“Fair enough. Would you be offended if I did not talk for a time?”
“Not at all, my lady,” Marek said, opening the door to the outside. He held the door open for Thea, allowing her to walk out. He took the lit torch and carefully lowered it into the bucket of sand placed near the door. The flame snuffed out, he left the torch in the bucket and closed the door. “Will you hold for a moment, my lady?”
Thea stopped. “Of course. What’s wrong?”
“Let me look about. I am guessing you are not willing to engage in conversation?”
“Not at all.” Thea shook her head vigorously.
“Then allow me to see the best way to get to the forest path.” He offered her the grin of a conspirator.
She smiled at him for thinking ahead. Stomping through the garden and ignoring people would garner her attention whether she wanted it or not.
“This way, my lady.” He started down a smaller side path, rather than one of the wider main paths. “Let us move quickly. We should be able to make the trees with no interruption.”
Thea hurried behind him. She kept her head up, so that if they did pass others, she’d look as though she were out for a walk rather than willing herself to stay her hand against one of her sisters.
The thought of Isobel made the heat rush to her cheeks. The utter nerve of her! She wasn’t sure she’d be able to face her, much less be civil. Before she knew it, she and Marek had reached the trees.
“We’ve made it, my lady. Where would you like to go?”
“Wherever. Just walk. I need to burn off some of my anger before I return.”
Marek nodded, and led her forward. They walked in silence for some time, Thea going over and over the conversation with Isobel. She had to find a way to talk to Casimir, to talk him out of this.
He’d said he’d marry her one way or the other, but her heart told her that this would not be the way, much as it leapt when hearing he’d declared for her.
“My lady?” Marek’s voice brought her from her thoughts.
“I’m sorry. I’m lost in my own thoughts.”
“I know. You are also muttering under your breath. Not to be impertinent,” he added.
“I’m sure I am. It’s somewhat miraculous that I am not screaming to the tree tops.”
“You are carrying a lot of intense emotion,” Marek said mildly.
“Indeed.” Thea tried to keep the sarcasm down, but it didn’t work.
“When we have men in the guard who are in the throes of intense emotion, we also encourage them to take a walk in the woods.”
“Really? Why is that? And what has it to do with me?” Thea was trying very hard not to be rude.
“We also send them with a practice sword and suggest they take on a tree.”
“What?” Thea gaped at him.
Marek had moved off the path, and found a stout, short stick. “Take this, my lady. Choose a tree and hit it. If you find you need to shout a bit, that would no doubt be useful as well.”
“Do you really send men out to the forest to beat on trees?” She was amused.
“When one cannot focus due to the thoughts within, those thoughts must be exorcised. Now, of course, they could practice with another man, but that runs the risk of one or both being hurt. The tree will not hit back. Nor will anyone see them. These solo practices allow for intense feelings to be expressed without inflicting harm on anyone.”
“Except the tree.”
“That is true. We actually have a few trees we’ve built a surround for so that they do not face undue hardship because of this practice.”
“It sounds effective. So what must I do?”
“That tree, that one right there.” Marek pointed to a thick, tall tree a few steps off the path. “Take your stick and hit it with all your might. Do so as many times as you feel necessary.”
“What will you do?”
“I shall walk over there.” He pointed to a spot up the path from her. “And wait for you.” He walked on, not looking back.
Thea stood with the stick in her hand, watching him leave. It sounded absurd. But she had never felt this much anger and rage, and she could see the sense of finding ways to tire oneself out.
She stepped closer to the tree. Holding the stick with both hands, she hit the tree experimentally. She hit it again, harder. A few more times and she angled her arms behind her and swung the stick as hard as she could.
The thwack that the impact made sent a vibration up her arms. She dropped the stick. Her arms felt a little numb. Sitting down, she clumsily rubbed her arms.
When the feeling returned, she picked up the stick again. She just wouldn’t hit as hard.
After a few hits, she got into a rhythm. Thinking over Isobel, and her guilty look, and her weaseling words, she started muttering.
“How…dare…you…you…dis…gusting…sel…fish…hag?” Each break in speech she hit the tree. Harder and harder, ignoring the pain shooting up her arms.
“He…is…mine….nev…er…loved…you…so…you…let….him…kill…him…self.” She dropped the stick. She could no longer feel her arms. Sinking to the ground, she rested her head against the trunk of the tree. Tears were falling freely. She must have started crying while hitting the tree.
She could hear Marek in the distance. If he was calling her, he’d have to come closer. She didn’t have the strength to get up.
“Thea!” Casimir appeared on the path. “What are you doing?”
Thea looked up at him and burst into tears.
“My lord! My lady is not desirous of company!” Marek stopped behind Casimir. “I must ask you to continue on.”
“It’s all right, Marek. He can stay,” Thea weakly held up a hand. “Please don’t let anyone else come find me, however.”
Marek nodded, cast a last, hard glance at Casimir, and walked down the path again.
Casimir sat down on a fallen log near her. “What are you doing, Thea?”
“Trying not to kill my fool of a sister.”
“Not to kill one? That’s fairly violent, Thea. What’s happened?” She could hear the humor lurking in his words.
“Why did you pu
t yourself forward to take on the challenge? Did you not just see a man die for this challenge?”
“I did. I am, however, not Ulric, Thea.” He gave her a look.
“I know that you are not him, but he was no laggard.”
Casimir rolled his eyes. “I am sorry to say that I had no hopes for his success. Besides, I would think you happy that I have finally said something to your father and made my intentions clear.”
“Not like this.”
He leaned forward, taking her hands up into his. “I told you that I would marry you. Me, and no other. I can solve this mystery.”
“You don’t know that, and I am certain Ulric felt the same.”
“Thea,” he slid off his log and crouched next to her on the ground. “I love you. I’ve been considering this before Ulric ever showed up. I wrote my father about it. He’s not happy with me, even less so since your father made it clear he would insist all meet the terms of agreement. He understands my concerns with the match your father made, and that this may be the only way I have to change things without starting a war.”
“How is Sebastian handling this?”
“Have you see him today?”
“No. I came down to the hall and had a fight with my father, and then with my sister, and now I’m here.”
“Beating on trees.” Casimir smiled.
“I’m so angry with Isobel! She wants you, Casimir. Even after I have told her that you and I care for one another, she chose not to believe me.” Thea felt the anger rise again, but it was far less hot and uncontrolled. Manageable.
Casimir pulled her close. He kissed her hair, and then, hesitantly, her forehead, and finally, achingly slowly, tilted her head up to kiss her lips.
The heat that had dulled with anger flared into being again. This time, though, the heat rose from her stomach, making all of her senses heighten. She could hear the rustle of the leaves on the ground as Casimir moved her closer. She smelled the fresh bark where she’d hit the tree. Her skin felt as though little bolts of lightning landed wherever she was in contact with Casimir.
He leaned into her, deepening his kiss. Thea parted her lips. She remembered how amazing it felt. His tongue touched her, and she felt him take a breath. He yanked her hard to him, crushing her with his lips, tangling his hand in her hair. Thea almost felt as though she couldn’t breathe.
Thea's Tale (Sisters Of The Curse Book 1) Page 25