by Reece Evhans
My eyes narrowed into slits as I looked at her. “He’s taken.” Lina and Veronica snickered.
“Ok,” said Lina. “You might want to make sure to stake your claim, though, or I’m going to consider him fair game.” She sauntered away.
“Bitch,” I muttered.
“Bitch who’s after your man,” Veronica added.
Perfect. All I needed was competition for Jack. Just great.
We did some lame cheers to get the crowd excited and then did a dance routine to "Move, Shake, Drop" (a clean version so the administration would not have kittens) by Pitbull. The climax of the routine came when I was standing straight up on Devonne's hands and he threw me up in the air and I came twirling down sideways to land in his arms. It looks pretty spectacular, but is actually a pretty easy stunt. Devonne's really strong and is able to throw me pretty high, and I tuck everything in on the way down so I spin really fast (thanks for the physics tip, Mr. Chiszowski). He then kind of throws me out of his arms and I do a series a backflips into drop splits. Hey, I did say I was a decent gymnast. Seriously, Jack does not know what he's missing. Kidding, jeez. I'm not that kind of girl. At least I don’t think I am.
Jack and Tara were waiting for me after the assembly. "So, how'd I do?" I asked anxiously. They were the only ones I cared about impressing.
"You were great, Ally!" Tara gushed. "I'm glad you're finally putting all your years in gymnastics to good use." She hugged me.
"Well?" I stood in front of Jack, who had his arms crossed and looked a bit bad moody.
"You were really good," he said reluctantly. "But my heart just about stopped when you were flipping around in the air. You should have warned me." He uncrossed his arms. "And why does that guy have to have his hands all over your ass? I'm not loving that part. It seems a bit intrusive and personal. Is that why you got into cheerleading, so you could have guys put their hands all over you in public?"
Wait, what? He was supposed to be proud. I had no words. What a jerk! Why would he say something so mean? I was so mad I just stared at him, fuming, trying not to let him see the tears that were trying to escape. He just stared right back. I was seriously contemplating punching him in the face when Tara stepped in.
"Ok, lover boy. Why don't we go to the cafeteria?" Tara grabbed Jack's arm and began pulling him away. "Ally, go get changed and meet us there. Maybe you both will have cooled off by then."
I turned without a word and stomped off. How could he? I never even wanted to do this stupid cheerleading! He had been all encouragement up until now, but then he goes and has a complete cow the first time he sees me actually cheer! Ugh!! I expected a little bit more support from him! I angrily ripped my skirt off and put my warm-ups back on. I was trying to keep the angry tears from overflowing, but it was a losing battle.
"Hey," it was Veronica. "You're ruining your eye makeup. Here," and she approached me and began dabbing at my eyes. "Stop crying. He's not worth it. Men are pigs, just accept it. Don't let him see that he made you cry. He’s not worth it. There," she stepped back to check her repair work. "You look great." She gave me a brief hug. "You also did great out there. You're the best flyer we've ever had. I never even thought you'd be interested in cheerleading. Who knew?" Who knew, indeed? "You are coming to my party tomorrow night, aren't you? Bring your boyfriend, if you've forgiven him by then."
"He's not my boyfriend," I objected, but she was already gone, leaving a whiff of perfume behind her. I shrugged and gathered up my cheer bag and headed to lunch. I had no intention of going anywhere with Jack Ruiz. You just do not treat me like that! I would show him a thing or two.
Jack was waiting for me in the hallway, leaning against the wall just outside the cafeteria. I paused when I saw him, but then squared my shoulders and prepared to walk right past him without a word. He reached his long arm out and gently grabbed my hand. "Ally, please. Can we talk?"
I pulled my hand roughly out of his and said, "Fine. Talk."
He sighed, pushed himself off the wall and took both my hands in his. I didn't pull mine away this time, but I refused to meet his eyes. "Ally, I'm sorry. I was a jerk. Tara pretty much let me know I was acting like an asshole."
"What did she say?" I asked, still not looking at him.
"She said 'Jack, you're acting like an asshole'." Tara really never minces words. "Look, Ally, I'm so sorry. I just saw you looking so amazing and sexy in that tiny skirt and then that guy was touching you in places that just made me see red. I went a little bit crazy."
"Jack," I said, pulling my hands away from him in frustration. "We're just friends, remember? You have no right to be so insanely jealous." Inside, I was somewhat flattered that it was actually jealousy that caused him to act like such a jerk, but still!
"Ally, you know we're more than that!"
"No, Jack! I don't know that! How could I know that?" I cried.
We both just stared at each other, chests heaving. Then, suddenly, I was sick of it all: sick of the guessing, the flirting, the backing off. I could see the hurt in his eyes and wondered if there wasn't more to this fight than he was telling me. This stupid fight was just not important. It was really just my pride that was smarting (props to Jane Austen for that little life lesson). Jack was what was important right now. I wanted more than friendship, but would take him on his terms for however long I needed to. I got one of my feelings that there was indeed more to this than what was on the surface, so I just stepped forward, put my arms around him, and buried my head in his hard chest. I heard him mutter 'shit' very softly and his arms came around me and held me tight.
"Jack, what is it? It's not just this, is it? Is something wrong?"
"Yeah," he sighed against my hair. "I got a call this morning. My probation hearing has been moved up. It's this afternoon. I guess I'm just freaking out. I was doing ok, holding it together, until I saw that guy's hands all over you. I'm sorry."
"I want to come with you," I stated as I pulled back to look at him, instantly putting our fight aside.
"No. Absolutely not. I don't want you to have to hear all that crap about me, the stuff I did. No way. I'll just call you when it's over." He set me away from him and turned away from me. “Let’s go eat lunch, ok?”
"Ok, fine. I'll just take the bus and meet you there. I'm sure Trina will tell me where to go."
He turned and exclaimed, "Goddammit, Ally! You are the most stubborn person I have ever met!" I just stared at him with my arms crossed, my eyebrows raised, waiting. "I just want to keep you separate from that part of my life," he tried again. Still I waited. "Fine," he sighed. "You win. Wait for me after school. I have to change clothes. You can ride with me. Maybe you'll finally realize why we shouldn't be together."
I smiled and stepped back into his arms. "I seriously doubt it, Jack."
"At least tell me that guy who was fondling you is gay," he said into my hair.
"Nope. 100% heterosexual. He asked me out." I couldn't resist.
Jack didn't let go; he just held me tighter. "And what did you say?"
"I said I couldn't possibly," I paused. "At this time."
Jack said a very bad word.
"See you after school." I gave him a last squeeze. And I walked away.
****
I waited for Jack outside the men's room after school. He walked out buttoning his dark suit jacket and my jaw must have dropped visibly.
"What?" he asked. "Do I look ok?"
"You look wonderful, Jack." He looked amazing, handsome, and about 25 years old. I stepped forward to straighten his collar.
He stilled my hands on his lapels. "I'm glad you're coming. I'm sorry about earlier. I'm just really nervous. I hope this is my last hearing."
"Jack, you're 18. Can they really keep you on probation any longer?"
"My probation officer said that the judge could grant a 6 month extension if the court feels I have not met the restrictions of my probation. He hasn't been real happy with me lately, so he may testify that I need a longer ter
m. If the judge thinks I'm in danger of being a habitual offender, he could keep me on probation until I'm 21. God, Ally. I just want to be done with all this."
"You will be. Just like you knew I'd make the cheerleading squad, I know for a fact that you will be a free man tonight." I finished straightening his collar.
"Ally," he held my face between his hands. "You're going to hear all the charges that were laid against me. Please don't judge me. I've changed a lot since then." In spite of the grown-up suit, he looked so vulnerable in that moment. I'm pretty sure I tumbled the rest of the way in love with him right then.
"Never," I said and reached up on my toes to give him a soft, brief kiss on his lips.
He pulled me close and set his forehead against mine. "Thank you. You have no idea what this means."
The drive downtown to the courthouse on 2nd and Lomas was nearly silent. He turned the radio on to a classics station and said nothing, his hands gripping the steering wheel tightly. When we got to the courthouse, Manny and Jack's cousin, Shelly, were both there, as well as a bunch of other relatives I hadn't met. Jack introduced me to his grandparents and so many cousins, aunts, and uncles I knew I'd never remember them all.
"Manny," said Jack, looking worriedly around. "You didn't let Megan come, did you?"
"Don't worry, mijo. She's at home with your aunt. Trina is praying for you."
Jack relaxed slightly. "Good. She shouldn't be here." Through all the various introductions, Jack had kept a firm hold on my hand, our fingers intertwined, as if I were his lifeline. My heart was breaking for him. If the judge didn't end his probation I would probably launch myself at him and start pummeling. Well, then Jack and I could be on probation together, at least.
We entered the courtroom and I went to sit by Manny and Shelley, while Jack sat up front with his lawyer. The judge started by stating that this was a post-disposition hearing for Jackson Iván Ruiz. He detailed the delinquency charges against Jack, the most serious of which was distribution of a controlled substance. I cringed to hear all the charges, not because they disgusted me or anything, but because I could just feel Jack shrinking in his chair with every separate charge. I knew that part of Jack's life was in the past, left behind as he learned to deal with his grief over losing his mother, and in every practical way, his father. He had been through so much and had emerged with a strong, steady character.
I didn't follow everything that was said, as so much of it was legal jargon. Jack's lawyer spoke for him, telling the judge that he had met all the requirements of his probation, had become an outstanding student both in high school and community college, was working successfully in his uncle's auto body shop, and had tested negative on every random drug test in the last two years. There were no school discipline reports in his file since moving to Albuquerque. He also said that Jack had completed court mandated drug and alcohol counseling and had also completed his mandatory community service. He had the support of a large and loving family. I held my breath when his probation officer spoke, but he simply reiterated what the lawyer had said: Jack had met all the requirements of his probation.
I watched Jack during the entire speech. His jaw was surely going to ache with how tight he was holding it. Finally, the judge asked Jack to stand. Shelley reached over and grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly.
"Mr. Ruiz, I have reviewed all of your probation reports and official school records. It is the judgment of this court that, having reached the age of 18 and having successfully completed the conditions of your probation and rehabilitation, you are now to be considered free and clear of the NM State Juvenile Justice system." He looked sternly over the top his reading glasses at Jack. "Son, you've been given a second chance. Don't blow it. Next time you will be charged as an adult. You may file a petition to have your juvenile record sealed. Court is adjourned." He rapped his gavel softly and got up to leave.
I watched Jack sink down in his chair and put his head in his hands. It completely floored me to see a tear slip down his cheek. He wiped it away quickly and stood to shake his lawyer's hand. Then he turned toward me. I was in his arms in seconds, not caring who was watching or who was in my way. He just held me as we rocked gently. "It's over," was all he said. I could only nod. We realized we couldn't stay like that, not with his family waiting. "Come on," he said and wrapped my hand tightly in his as we turned to greet his jubilant family.
Shelley gave us both a hug, her eyes streaming. "Damn contacts," she said as she turned away to wipe her face.
"Jack," Manny approached with a cellphone outstretched. "Trina wants to talk to you."
He took the phone with a smile. "Hey, Trina. Yeah, I am, thanks. Um, yeah she is. Wait, I'll ask her." He took the phone away from his ear and looked at me. "She wants you to come to dinner. It's more of a command than an invitation." I could hear Trina squawking from the phone, "It is not!"
I laughed, "Of course I'll come. Tell her thanks."
He picked up the phone again. "Let me talk to Megan, please." I squeezed his hand as I listened to him. "Yeah, mija. I'm done. No more probation. I love you, too." Another tear began to slide down his cheek. I reached up to wipe it away quickly before anyone could see. "See you in little while. Yes, I'm bringing her. Of course I'm bringing her," he smiled down at me.
Jack's extended family finally cleared the courtroom and began to disperse, heading to what was beginning to sound like quite the celebration at Manny and Trina's.
Jack loosened his tie as we walked to his car amidst the congratulatory well wishes of his relatives. I was dying for just a few minutes of alone time with him and heartily wished them all to a very far-off island. We finally reached his car, parked on a different level of the downtown parking garage, and found a blessed moment of solitude. I waited for him to open my door for me, as I had begun to become accustomed, but instead he turned me around and backed me against the side of his car, gently taking my face in his hands.
He looked intently into my eyes. "After everything you heard about what I've done, do you still want to be with me? I swear that part of my life is over, Ally, but I can't change what I did and I can't make myself any younger. I'm still two years older than you."
"Yes," I whispered. "I still want to be with you, Jack."
"Ok, then no more pretending," he whispered back. And then he was kissing me. He was kissing me with all the pent-up feelings of these last few weeks and I was kissing him back with every bit of longing and love I could possibly put into a kiss. Our lips moved against each other, our mouths opened and his tongue slipped into my mouth. I met him stroke for stroke, loving the taste, the feel of him. I couldn't get close enough. Finally, finally, my heart was beating against his. My hands were in his hair and his were making a wreck of my cheerleading ponytail. "God, Ally," his forehead rested against mine as we finally broke for breath. "Do you have any idea how long I have wanted, needed to do that? I don't want to be 'just friends'."
I put my hands on each of his cheeks and looked as deeply into his beautiful almost-black eyes as I could. "Neither do I," and I kissed him again. This kiss was as soft and sacred as the last was frantic and frenzied. It was a promise, almost a vow, and I felt the last part of my heart click into place. We belonged together and I felt like so much of my life had been building up to this moment. We broke apart and I said against his lips, "Let's go. Your family's waiting."
****
I convinced Jack to swing by my house so I could change out of my cheerleading uniform and into regular clothes before meeting his family.
"You look fine, querida. You've already met most of them, anyway."
"Not as your girlfriend, Jack." I hesitated, unsure if I had assumed too much. "I mean, if that's what you..."
He laughed briefly and took my hand in his as he drove. "Of course you're my girlfriend, Ally. If that's what you want to be, I mean."
"Yeah, I do," I whispered. We just looked at each other and smiled.
No one was home yet when we got to my house so I t
old Jack I needed about 15 minutes and left him on the couch with my cat. I rushed upstairs to change into one of the outfits Tara had helped me choose. As I looked through my closet, I pulled out the muted teal ruched t-shirt dress she had found for me on sale at Anthropology. Did I have the guts to wear the clingy jersey dress? Would Jack like it? Was it too much? I compromised by pairing it with black capri leggings so as not to look like I was trying too hard and added a sweater shrug since it was chilly outside. I brushed out my hair and removed the glitter from my eyes, trying to replicate the subtler 'smokey-eye' look that the magicians at Sephora had created. I wanted to look sophisticated for him, yet appropriate for his family. I added a long necklace and then headed downstairs to Jack.
He had removed his suit coat, loosened his tie, and rolled up his sleeves. Wicky was purring on his chest as Jack rubbed his ears. I stopped at the bottom of the stairs, hesitant, unsure of myself. He looked up, saw me, and put Wicky aside to stand up and walk over to me, never breaking eye contact with me.
"My God, Ally. You are so beautiful." Then I was in his arms and we were kissing again. Our height difference made it somewhat challenging, with Jack having to bend down quite a way, but we managed just fine. I would never get tired of this.
When we paused to take a breath, I asked, "What does 'querida' mean? You called me that in the car."
He leaned back in to kiss along my jaw line, making my eyes flutter closed in pleasure. "It means ‘darling’ in English," he captured my earlobe gently between his teeth, which sent shivers all through me. "Is it ok to call you that?"
"To call me what?" I had completely lost track of what we were discussing. Why were we discussing anything? This was definitely not the time for talking. I felt him smile against my face and then his lips were back on mine, his tongue seeking entrance to the warm depths of my mouth.
We were so absorbed in each other that we didn't hear the door open. My mother clearing her throat finally penetrated and we broke apart, Jack still keeping his arm around me. In all the weeks we had been hanging out together, Jack and my mother had yet to meet. This was probably not the exact way I had pictured that meeting.