Dark Love

by Olivia M. Howe

  “It was nice meeting you too,” I say, smiling also.

  * * * *

  On the car ride home from school I'm thinking that my first day of school was pretty good. I made two friends and I like all of my classes. I should tell Caroline about Kali. I told Kali I would talk to her. She seemed pretty desperate for more cheerleaders and I know my sister has the personality for it. So, she would be perfect.

  I turn around to look in the back seat at Caroline. “Lynns,” I always call her. It’s easier saying her middle name then saying her whole name every time.

  “What?” She says to me, looking right in my eyes.

  “I met a new friend today. Her name is Kali and she's on the cheerleading squad. She needs more girls and I mentioned your name to her,” I reply.

  “Oh my god. I would love to join. That would be so much fun and I would meet so many new people.” She seems over excited.

  Ali of course buts into the conversation, “Nina, you met a new friend today?”

  “Yes, mom I did. I met two actually. But it’s not a big deal.” Truthfully it really isn’t a big deal, but my mom is too happy to hold in her excitement.

  “I'm so happy for you! What are their names? How did you all meet? I want details," she says with a grin on her face. She wants details? It’s not like I just met a guy and decided to get married to him. I just made a couple of friends.

  I let her enjoy her happiness for me and decide to give her some details, not many. “I met Kali Lexington first. Then, in photography class I met Sydney Paigee.”

  “I'm so happy for you, sweetie.” I know she is just by the look on her face.

  CHAPTER 3

  The First Encounter

  Dear Diary,

  Sometimes I feel all alone in this world. Even though there is an estimate of over 7 billion people in the universe. I can't wait for the day that I can actually feel at least one of those souls.

  Today I just couldn't get any ambition to get myself out of bed. I'm feeling very depressed. The sadness is starting to come back once in a while with full force. It's getting harder and harder to fight off. It feels like I'm at war with myself and at this point the enemy part of me is winning, but I will not give up. I'm not a quitter. I will be fighting until the end. Hopefully, the war with myself with soon come to an end. I want to find my peace and my happiness. I think I deserve to find my true happiness. That's all I ever wish for nowadays, but God has a plan for me. He knows my true reason to be here. I just pray he helps me through the rough times that I've been experiencing.

  I still think about my dad every day and miss him more than ever. I just hope he's looking down on me and smiling. I hope he's proud of the person I'm trying to become.

  Love, Nina

  * * * *

  This morning is identical to yesterday. I decide against getting all dressed up. I would rather just be in my comfortable clothes than try to impress anyone. A pair of blue jeans and a t-shirt is perfect for me.

  I go downstairs to get breakfast. My mom says good morning to me and hands me a plate of food. She cooked bagel breakfast sandwiches with a side of fruit and orange juice. I feel like she spoils us, but I'm not objecting to her generosity.

  She looks at me with a walloping smile on her face. “I have a surprise for you. Something you seemed to forget about.”

  “What is it?” I want to know immediately. She throws something at me and I catch it. It's the keys to my car. “OH MY GOD!” I yell. I'm so joyful to get my Saab back on the road again.

  “You mind driving your sister to school every day?” Ali asks.

  “Of course I will. Thank you mom so much for getting my car fixed!” I'm stoked to drive to school and show off my red Saab. Of course, I don’t mind bringing my sister to school. It should take some relief and tension off of my mom so she can stay home, relax and not have to worry about bringing us to school and picking us up from school.

  “Lynns, let’s go! I'm driving you to school!” I yell to her in excitement.

  “Nina, finish your food before you leave,” Ali insists.

  “I’m fine mom. I want to get to school early. I'm not that hungry anyway,” I lie. I'm just so excited to drive to school.

  * * * *

  It feels like I haven’t driven for years. The inside of my car has all black interior. The seats are leather and don't have covers over them. I like to keep things simple. My steering wheel cover is a cottony type of material. It feels smooth when I'm driving and it matches my black interior.

  We arrive at school and I drive through the parking lot trying to find a place to park. I acquire a spot right next to the front doors.

  “Am I going to be able to meet Kali today?” Lynns has been overly excited to meet the cheer captain.

  “Maybe, I’m not sure though. You'll probably meet her this weekend,” I start to explain.

  “At my “surprise birthday party” that mom is obviously going to have,” Caroline doesn’t hesitate to say. We both know how Ali is. She tries to surprise us every year and every year we act astonished so we don’t hurt her feelings.

  We both look at each other and laugh. “Yes, I invited her to your “surprise birthday party” this weekend. I didn’t ask mom about it yet, but we both know what she's up to!” I can't help but continue the laughter.

  As I get out of my car and step outside I feel a nice breeze in the air. I love the sweet smell of fall. I look up in the sky and it’s absolutely lovely. It’s mostly clear, just a few clouds. It’s picture perfect. I wish I had my camera handy right now.

  We walk into the school and I start walking to my first class, even though I'm early. I'll have to sit there for an extra ten minutes.

  My stomach starts to growl. I should have eaten something, but I was in to much of a rush to drive my car. I regret that decision now.

  * * * *

  The first class was long and didn't go by quickly like I wanted it to . It was uninteresting. I sat there and listened to everything the teacher said this time. I didn’t let Kali distract me, again. The biology teacher doesn’t assign homework today. That's pretty thoughtful of him. I end up skipping breakfast to have Mr. Jackson help me with the biology homework that I didn’t do last night. The only reason why I didn’t do it was because I didn’t understand it. Since it's the second day in the first semester he cut me some slack and told me to stay during breakfast and he would help me with it. I have to admit, the beginning of the school year has its advantages.

  On my way to English class I hear my stomach making funny noises. I should have listened to my mother and eaten breakfast. It's the most important meal of the day. I just ignore the silly sounds it's making and walk into the classroom. It isn’t a big deal anyway.

  I sit down at my desk and I start to feel myself shaking. I guess it is a big deal. I should have eaten. I'm starting to feel like I'm going to faint. Maybe that's why Ali makes so much food. She's most likely worried something like this could happen. I just hope I can get through this one class because after is lunch time.

  Then, all of the sudden I feel my body stop working and my eyes close.

  * * * *

  I open my eyes and nothing looks familiar. I try to focus my eyes so my vision won't be so blurry anymore. Where am I? I'm laying in someone’s office. I sit up quickly and feel light headed.

  “Take it easy, Nina. You just fainted. Stay sitting down,” I hear a voice say.

  I look up and see the most beautiful face that I've ever seen in my life. He's tall, built well, with short, dark, black hair and dark eyes. His skin is pale and it's beautiful. He looks like he belongs in an Abercrombie and Fitch magazine.

  “What happened? Where am I?” I'm without a doubt confused.

  “It’s OK. You’re in the nurse’s office,” the beautiful voice spoke again.

  “Who are you? Why am I in the nurse’s office?” He's not giving me the information I need to get me out of this confusion state of mind.

  “You fainted in English
class. I caught you and carried you down here to the nurse’s office," he says sweetly. “I’m Andrew Madsen.” He reaches his hand for mine.

  I place my hand in his and I have no choice, but to look into his eyes. “Thank you. I would introduce myself, but you already know my name.” I laugh.

  Andrew starts laughing with me. “The teacher informed me," he clarifies. “Are you feeling OK?” He asks and seems surprisingly caring.

  “I'm very hungry. That’s probably why I fainted. I skipped breakfast,” I start to explain. “I feel so embarrassed. I can’t believe I fainted in class.”

  “Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, you know?” He says while looking at me with those dazzling dark eyes. My mom would love him for saying that.

  “Yes, I know that. I was just in a hurry to get to school,” I sigh.

  “You were in a hurry to get to school? That’s the first time I heard someone say that,” he giggles in amazement.

  “Well, I was in a hurry to drive my car. It just got out of the shop."

  “That pretty red Saab outside?” he asks.

  “Yeah, how did you know that?” I'm in shock that he knows what kind of car I drive.

  “I saw it before I walked into school this morning,” Andrew answers. “You can’t really miss it. It’s right in front of the school.”

  “Oh. Yeah, that’s my precious.”

  He just smiles and the nurse walks in. She goes over and sits down at her desk. She starts looking through some paperwork on her desk before she even acknowledges my presents. “How are you feeling, Nina?” The nurse asks.

  “I'm just hungry. I missed breakfast this morning,” I lie to her. I actually chose to skip breakfast this morning.

  “I wouldn’t do that again if I was you, but you’re in luck. It’s lunch time,” she says.

  “It’s lunch time? I’ve been out for that long?”

  “You opened your eyes for literally three seconds. We asked you if you were OK and you said you were fine and went back to sleep,” Andrew adds in.

  “I don’t remember that,” I admit.

  “Well, go get some lunch. You definitely need it!” The nurse demands.

  I get myself up slowly and reach for my things. I'm just about to pick up my books when Andrew grabs them. My hand touches his and I feel this sensation fill my body. “I can carry them for you,” he says and smiles that perfect smile. I just stare at him for a few seconds. Is he trying to make me faint again?

  “Thank you,” is all I manage to spit out.

  Walking out of the nurse’s office with Andrew was like the first day I was in school and walked into Biology class. Everyone is staring at us. I can’t figure out why either. It's not like I'm the new girl here.

  Then, I see the look in some of the student's faces. They seem like they are taken by surprise and curious. Why though? That’s the real question I want to know. Is it because my father died and I'm hanging out with a guy? Is it because I fainted? Is it because they knew I was in the hospital over the summer? I just hope Andrew doesn't find out about any of it.

  “Why is everyone staring at us?” I'm starting to get annoyed. Maybe they think I'm fragile and don't know how to treat me because of all the issues that have happened in the past few months. Staring is one thing they shouldn't do.

  “I was just going to ask you the same question." He doesn’t look at me when he speaks. He just keeps his eyes focused in front of him.

  We get into the lunch room and all eyes are still on us. This is starting to get very old. They need to mind their own business already!

  “Would you like to have lunch with me today?" Andrew asks.

  "Sure."

  "I'll grab us a table," he insists.

  “You’re not going to get some food?” I'm starving. I don’t understand how he isn't. I don’t think anyone skipped lunch around here. They have some decent food. The salads are actually the best.

  “I’m not hungry, but more people should be in here soon so I would get a spot in the lunch line if I were you.” He stares at me for a moment and then puts my books at a table and takes a seat.

  I get in line for lunch. I don't question him because I'm to hungry. That nap helped me a lot though, but it’s still embarrassing. Andrew said he caught me when I fainted. I don’t even recall seeing him in that class at all, unless he was in the way back of the classroom.

  “Nina! Are you OK? I heard you fainted!” Kali yells. When she screams that in my ear I almost drop my food everywhere.

  “Oh my god,” I yell. “You just almost scared the life out of me.” It sure felt like she did. “And the food right out of my hands,” I laugh.

  She begins to laugh and then starts talking. “I’m sorry. Macy told me you fainted in English class. I see you’re OK. What happen?” She asks. Her eyes are almost popping out of her head. I can’t help but laugh.

  “I forgot to eat breakfast this morning. I should know better. It just slipped my mind.” Lying is much easier then telling the whole story over again. “And who is Macy?”

  “Macy is a friend of mine. She's on the cheerleading team,” Kali informs me. “I heard Andrew Madsen caught you before you hit the ground!” She looks surprised.

  “That’s what he told me.”

  “Wait, he talked to you?” She's in complete shock.

  “Um, yes he did.” That’s a silly question considering he carried me down to the nurse’s office and stayed in there to make sure I was OK. Of course he was going to talk to me. "He held a pretty good conversation with me."

  “Nina,” Kali looks at me serious. “He so must be into you. You're so lucky because he's absolutely gorgeous. His eyes freak me out a little bit because they're so dark, but I don’t care. He's breathtaking.” Kali's talking a million miles per hour. She's absolutely right, he is breathtaking.

  "I’m sitting with him today for lunch.” I glance over his way and make sure he's not looking. “He saved us a table over there.” I point his way.

  “Oh. My. God. You're so lucky!" Kali informs me.

  “Is he new here? I've never seen him before?" I ask.

  "Yes, he is. This is his first year at this school."

  I pay for my salad and go over to sit with Andrew. Everyone’s eyes are still on us. They need to understand I'm not this fragile little girl and they just need to keep their eyes to themselves.

  “I feel famous.” I look around at everyone. He just laughs and looks at me. I'm never going to get enough of how stunning he is. I love when he smiles with his pink lips and his dark eyes that seem to hold so much mystery. I notice his face looks more mature than the other guys in this school.

  “So, how long have you lived in Scarlett Hills?” Andrew asks.

  “For to long,” I say. “What brings you here?”

  He sits there and just looks away. It's like he's trying to make something up. Like, he's hiding something. “My brother and sister."

  “Do they go to school here?” I question.

  “My sister, Alex, does. My older brother, William, comes when he feels like it. He's what I call stubborn. You'll probably see them around sometime.”

  I wonder why he just said he came here for his brother and sister. Where are his parents? I want to ask him, but now isn’t the right time. I just met him. That wouldn't feel right just asking him about his parents when it could be a very personal and touchy subject for him. I'll hold off on the parents question.

  “Oh, I bet I'll see them around here soon. This school and town are small,” I giggle.

  The bell rings. It's time for my next class. I get up and grab my trash and throw all of it away. I pick up my bag and put it around my shoulder. I go to reach for my books and Andrew grabs them, once again. I don't try to question why he's doing this for me. I just look at him and we both stare into each others' eyes. After a minute it gets awkward, but I definitely feel like Andrew Madsen and I just had a moment.

  He walks me to Government class and is carrying all of my books
. I notice he has this divine smell to him. His scent is different than anything I have ever smelt before. It's sweet and soothing. It smells like a vanilla orchid flower, extremely potent and sexy, very sweet and unique- one of a kind.

  “Do you feel better?” Andrew interrupts the silence between us.

  “I feel so much better,” I respond back to him.

  “I hope so. You don’t need to be fainting again. Especially when we don’t have the same class together because I won’t be able to catch you this time,” he says with a sad but humorous face.

  “Thank you for helping me earlier.”

  “It’s my pleasure to help you, Nina. I'm just glad you're OK,” he says in such a soft tone.

  As I watch him walk away, it's bittersweet. He looks so perfect, so breathtaking.

  I need to know more about Andrew Madsen.

  CHAPTER 4

  Birthday Girl

  Dear Diary,

  What is true happiness? I've been sitting here staring at this paper, trying to figure out what the answer to that question is. So far, I've come up with absolutely nothing. The definition of happiness on the internet is, "The state of well- being. Emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy." I don't fully agree with that statement. I feel as if happiness isn't a state of well- being. I think it's more then that. It's something that is unexplainable. This whole time I've been searching for my true happiness, or I should say something that doesn't exist. The reason I say that is because I can't even answer the question, "What is true happiness?" I need to answer that question first to be able to find my true bliss.

  I woke up today with a real smile on my face. I didn't have to force it there either. It feels really good. I met a guy yesterday. His name is Andrew Madsen. He's the most beautiful, breathtaking guy I have ever laid my eyes on, even though I met him in the most embarrassing moment of my life. I can't believe I fainted right in front of him and the rest of my class. At least he had the decency to catch me or I would have probably had a concussion or something even more embarrassing, but I have to admit, I'm kind of happy that I fainted in class because if I didn't I would never have met Andrew.