by Emma Tharp
After what felt like an hour, the tears finally slowed down and I was able to tell him all about how Donovan ruined everything that I thought we were building—and how it was all a big game to him.
It was like having my heart cut in half hearing Garrett ask Donovan if his plan was working out. Spencer was as mad as I was listening to the details. How could Donovan want to hurt me so badly? What kind of a person would play with someone's emotions like that? And the worst part was, he tricked me so well into believing that he had feelings for me.
"Okay, cook away." Spencer leans against the counter.
I swallow back a sob and nod.
"Do you need some wine, princess?"
Stirring the batter, I let the movement calm me. Alcohol doesn’t seem like such a good idea. It’d be too easy to get drunk and do something stupid, like call Donovan and make a complete fool of myself. "No. I will have some tea if you have it."
"You know I do." Spencer fills his kettle with water then puts it on the stove.
Pouring the batter in a pan, I put it in the oven.
We both take a seat at his small table in the kitchen.
“So what are you going to do now?” Spencer props his elbow on the table and rests his head in his hand.
I suck in a long breath and really think about my answer. My heart aches in my chest and hopelessness washes over me. “I move on with my life. It’s the only choice I have.”
Spencer sits up straight and nods. “Yes. You’re going to get up, dust yourself off, and keep moving forward.”
Everything I thought I wanted just got yanked out from under me, but my company is doing well. That’s where my focus is going to be from here on out.
“That was an excellent party. My daughter is so pleased. Thanks again, Liza,” my client says as she hands me a check. It’s the final payment for the sweet sixteen party I just catered.
“I’m happy that you all enjoyed the party,” I tell her as I tuck the check into my purse and put my coat on.
“Let us know if you have any future events you need catered, or if you have friends or family who need us. We appreciate referrals,” Spencer chimes in.
“Without a doubt, I will.” She walks us to the door and sees us out.
I grab Spencer’s arm as we make our way to the elevator. Once inside and out of ear shot of our client, I say, “Wait until you see the tip she gave us.” Tugging the check out of my purse, I hand it him.
His eyes widen and he shrieks as he dances around in a circle. “Woah. Let’s go out and celebrate.”
As much as I’d like to revel in our success, I’m not feeling it.
It’s been two weeks since I found out Donovan’s true intentions. Two weeks of phone calls and texts from him that I’ve ignored. Two weeks of feeling empty without him. It’s been the longest fourteen days of my life.
And sadly, all of my success feels lackluster now without him.
“You go out. I’m exhausted.” I fake a huge yawn.
The elevator dings that we’re on the ground floor. Spencer hands me the check back and I put it in my purse. “Going out might cheer you up. We could look for guys together.”
“Nah. I’m not ready for that yet, Spencer, but thank you for trying. Just give me a little more time.” Or a lot more. I don’t know how long it’s going to take for me to get over Donovan, but I have a feeling it’s going to be a very long time before I give someone my heart again.
“Anything you need, princess.” He puts his arm around me as we head outside to hail a cab.
My phone dings with an incoming text message. I’d like to ignore it, because I have a feeling it’s Donovan. Again. But I can’t disregard it in case it’s a client.
Please talk to me. I want to explain.
Tears burn the back of my eyes. I power off the phone and throw it in my purse. There’s no explanation Donovan can give me that will make up for what he did.
It’s over.
Nineteen
Donovan
I’m being ghosted. It’s a strange feeling, since I’m usually the one who’s doing the ghosting.
Liza won’t return my calls and I don’t even know if she’s reading my texts. It’s maddening. If she’d give me five minutes to talk to her, I could try to explain to her where I was coming from and then I’d proceed to beg for her forgiveness. On my hands and knees if need be.
The last two weeks have been absolute torture. I’ve never had these feelings for any woman—with the exception of Liza herself in high school. I care for her in a way that scares me and thrills me all at the same time. This woman has me wanting to settle down. There’s nobody else I want.
At the gym last weekend, the woman I hooked up with before Liza was there again throwing herself at me. I didn’t want anything to do with her. She promised to do things to me that would’ve had me jumping at the chance before Liza. Not now. Liza has ruined me for all other women.
I need to get her back.
Putting my feet up on my couch, I dial my sister’s number.
“Hi, Donovan.”
“Giselle. How are you?”
“Besides being swamped at work, I’m great. How about you?” she asks.
“I’ve been better. That’s why I’m calling you. I need your advice.”
“Okay. How can I help?”
The fact of the matter is, I’m not sure she can. She’s no relationship expert, but she is a woman that I trust. “I’m having woman troubles.”
She laughs loud enough I have to pull my cell away from my ear.
“What’s so funny?” This is no laughing matter.
She takes a few breaths and her giggling stops. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t make light of this. But I was caught off guard. It’s not every day that you call me wanting to talk about a woman.”
“I know. It’s unprecedented. And now I need your help. How can I get a girl back? I’m afraid I messed up. Big time.”
“Wow. This is serious. Are we talking about Liza Dooley? The two of you were pretty close at your cocktail party and the gala.”
Even hearing my sister say her name stirs up my insides. “Yes. It’s Liza.” I give Giselle a condensed version of how I epically screwed things up with her. “Now I need to win her back. Do you have any ideas?”
“Since I don’t know her that well, I can’t give you specifics, but you need to make a grand gesture. Think of something that will wow her and do that. It could work.”
My wheels start to turn. I know just what I should do. “Thank you, Giselle. This has really helped out.”
As I order an espresso, the barista flips her hair and bats her lashes at me. “Anything else for you, sir?”
“No.” I’m purposely short with her. I’m on a mission.
She proceeds to make my drink and when she hands it to me, there’s also a napkin with it—that has her number on it.
I give her a curt nod and walk toward the trash. Balling up the napkin, I dispose of it and find a seat near the door. There’s no time to waste this morning.
I grab an open table near the front entrance and sit facing the door and wait. My foot taps incessantly and I keep checking my watch. The espresso is steaming hot, but I drink it down in three swallows. Just as I’m about to get up to order another—even though more caffeine is the last thing I need—Spencer, Liza’s assistant, comes through the door.
Jumping to my feet, I stand in front of him, stopping his forward momentum into the shop. “Hello, Spencer. We need to talk.”
His eyes dart around as if he’s looking for an escape. There isn’t one. “But I’m going to be late if I don’t get g…going.”
“Sit.”
He shuffles back a step before taking a seat. “Okay. Sitting.”
I remembered Spencer’s morning routine of stopping here in the morning to pick up his and Liza’s coffees before heading to the commercial kitchen for work. Liza loves the lattes here. This is my opportunity. “I’m sorry to corner you like this, but I need to enlis
t your help.” I sit across from him.
He rubs the back of his neck, squeezing the corded muscles. The dude acts like he’s being interrogated by the FBI. “I don’t know what you think I can do.”
I put my hands up as if surrendering. “You can relax, Spencer. I’m only asking for you to hear me out. Please. I know you’re Liza’s best friend and she must’ve told you what happened between us.”
Spencer takes a deep breath in and holds it for what feels like forever before he blows it all out—clearly conflicted on how much he should tell me. “We talked about it.”
“Okay. Good. I’m here to be completely honest with you about what happened and how I feel. I never do that.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. I’m not going to hold back. This is too important. I’ve had feelings for Liza since high school, but back then she didn’t want me as more than a friend. When she came back into my life, I was a smug asshole who thought I could somehow exact revenge on her by making her fall for me and then walking away.” I let out a humorless laugh. “It was thoughtless and stupid.”
“That was a pretty dumb idea.”
“It was. I never should’ve played with my heart or hers. And I realized quickly that I wasn’t going to be able to turn my back on her. Unfortunately, she overheard a conversation between my brother and me that she shouldn’t have, because I hadn’t expressed to him how I was feeling. I wish I could go back and do that all over again, but I can’t. Now, I want to move forward and fix this. I’ll do anything to make this right.”
“You sound desperate,” Spencer says, a frown spread across his lips.
“I am. I’m a changed man and I’m ready to give up my dating—bachelor life. Losing Liza would be devastating. Do you think you can help me?”
He claps his hands together. “I’m in. What can I do?”
Twenty
Liza
“Can you get the door?” I ask Spencer. Someone is knocking and I’m adding the finishing touches on the salad.
“Sure, I can get it,” he calls out over his shoulder.
I don’t know what I would’ve done without Spencer these last few weeks. He’s been my rock. Personally and professionally. I’ve been a mess without Donovan. And his calls and texts have slowed down. He’s giving up. It’s for the best, but it hurts like hell.
We’re at a luxury hotel in the penthouse suite. The man we’re working for has spared no expense. All I have left to do is prepare the browned butter and herbs for the scallops. Once we’re finished here, everything will go in the warmer until the host arrives.
Spencer comes into the kitchen with his arms full of sunflower and peony bouquets. “They’re beautiful. Set them on the table.”
“Will do. What do we have left to do?” Spencer asks.
“You can open the wine.”
He walks to the end of the counter and picks up the wine key. “This client has great taste.”
“Right? I’m jealous. From the flowers to dessert—everything is perfect. You took this booking, didn’t you?”
“I did.” Spencer pours the wine into a decanter.
“What’s the occasion?” I don’t remember Spencer mentioning any of the details. It has to be a proposal or a big anniversary. My heart sinks. How I wish I had someone who cared about me enough to arrange an evening like this.
Spencer turns his back to me and goes to the stereo and puts on Dave Matthews Band. “You know, I can’t remember. We’ve been so busy.”
“Huh. Okay.” I stir tarragon and thyme into the pan with butter.
There’s a knock at the door.
“I’ll get it,” Spencer calls out over his shoulder as he jogs toward the door.
“Who could that be?” We aren’t expecting any other deliveries. The florist was the last one.
“It’s me.”
I freeze. It’s Donovan’s voice.
He strolls in wearing a black suit and tie. All the air leaves the room when he stalks toward me. There’s a hint of darkness under his eyes, but other than that, he looks good enough to eat. I shake the thought away. He’s the enemy now. “What are you doing here?”
“It’s our anniversary.”
“What are you talking about?” My mind races, but nothing makes sense.
“I gave you your loan one year ago today. Don’t you remember?” He comes closer but stops when I glare at him.
He’s right. It’s been a year since I signed the loan agreement, and thanks to his help, I’m going to be able to start making payments on it on time. “I’m not sure I’d call this an anniversary.”
“Call it what you’d like. I thought it was worth celebrating.” He moves to stand next to me. He’s close enough to touch. He turns off the burner that was browning the butter.
I take a step back. Breathing in his clean scent is too much. “You’ll forgive me if I disagree. We don’t have anything to celebrate.”
“Come here, please.” Donovan walks toward the table. “Sit with me for a couple of minutes. I’d like to talk to you.”
I fold my arms across my chest. “You tricked me. And Spencer was in on it. Spencer!”
“He’s gone. And please don’t blame him. I had to beg him to help me and I’m not above begging you to come talk to me.”
It all makes sense now. Everything here tonight is my favorite. The wine, the meal, and music. The peonies and sunflowers. He set this all up for me. He’s gone to great lengths to make this happen.
I guess I can give him a few minutes of my time even though my head is telling me to run. I tentatively make my way to the table and take a seat across from him. “I’m here, but I can’t imagine what you want to talk about. I think I heard quite enough from you and your brother at the gala.” Nausea swirls around my belly thinking back to that night. I was completely crushed. I still am.
“Liza. I’m so sorry. I have to explain to you what happened. And to do that I have to start at the beginning.” He stands, grabs the decanter, and brings it to the table. He doesn’t ask if I want any wine, but fills the glasses at the place settings. He takes a large swallow of his. “It’s no secret how I felt about you in high school. And after graduation, we lost touch. I was bitter about the way you treated me. I was always there for you and wanted more, and there were times I thought you might reciprocate. Remember the night I brought a pizza to your house and cheered you up after your breakup with Ted Lansing?”
“I think I remember that night,” I say.
“We watched a movie and you snuggled up with me and told me how much you loved me. Does that ring a bell?”
“Sort of.” I’m having a hard time summoning the conversation.
His face falls and his posture seems to deflate. “You told me that you loved me. And it was a big deal for me. But the next day you and Max Conner started talking, as if I wasn’t even an option. You crushed my teenage heart.”
I shift in my seat, uncomfortable that I treated Donovan that way. “I knew you cared about me, but I didn’t realize how much. I thought we were friends.”
He shakes his head and his jaw stiffens. “I know. And for a while that was okay, but as time passed by after graduation, I thought you’d keep in touch. I kept calling you and you stopped returning my calls. You disregarded me and it hurt.”
My chin dips down as a flush creeps across my cheeks. “It’s my fault. I was so embarrassed when I dropped out of college, that I pretty much lost contact with everyone from high school. That’s on me.” I have so many regrets from that time in my life. If I could go back and change things, this would be one of them.
“You know that I never would have judged you for that. And as the years went by, I slowly stopped thinking about you. I thought I got over you, too. But when I saw your name on my desk, I had a crazy idea. It’s going to sound horrible, because it is, but I thought if I could make you fall for me, then I could finally walk away from you and be able to move on.” He’s looking down, rubbing his hands together. When his eyes finally mee
t mine, they’re full of regret.
“Wow.”
“I know. When I say it out loud now, it’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. But the immature teenager in me came out and wanted revenge. So, I came up with the plan.”
All the blood seems to drain from my face. I drink half my glass of wine in one go. My eyes ache with unshed tears, desperate to fall, but I fight them with all I have. “Donovan. I had no idea your heart was so cold.”
“It hardened through the years. I’ve kept every woman I’ve ever met at arm’s length. I thought I was happier that way. That is, until I started my plan. Winning you over”—he makes air quotes—“was the best I’ve ever felt. I enjoyed every minute I got to spend with you. And it wasn’t long before I realized that as I was trying to get you to fall for me, I was falling for you.” The frown he wore moments ago turns into a weak smile. “I told my brother my original plan. He didn’t support it, but at the gala he was asking for an update. And by then I knew that my plan had changed, but I wasn’t ready to share it with him yet. I was holding it close for a while.”
I heave out a sigh because I don’t want to ask the question, but I have to know the answer. “What was your new plan?”
He stands up to move into the seat next to me. Grabbing my legs, he swings them toward him so we’re face-to-face. His dark eyes sear into mine. “To keep you.”
“It’s too late now,” I say as tears begin to fall. “You hurt me too much, Donovan.”
“I’m so sorry that I hurt you. I know what I was going to do would have been unforgiveable, but I couldn’t go through with it. Don’t you see that? I’ve always loved you, since we were fourteen. And I still do, except now it isn’t infatuation. It’s true. And real.”
I shake my head. “How do you know it’s real? It sounds to me like you don’t know what love is.” How could he? If he’s always loved me, then how could he want to cause me so much pain?
“Because I thought my life was good, that I was fulfilled. That I didn’t need anyone to complete me. Women were for a night’s enjoyment. But when you came back into my life, I didn’t want to let you go. I still don’t.” His hand comes up to my cheek and he wipes the tears away with the pad of his thumb.