by Lorri Dudley
“I don’t understand,” Lottie said. “Why would the British Navy take from its own ships? They impressed several men from the Amory into service.”
“Some naval captains are privateers in disguise and keep the spoils for themselves. Merchant ships suffer the most during a trade war, but they also can exact a higher price because the risk of invading pirates and privateers is so great.”
Lottie bit her lip. Should she tell Julia what she overheard? The rumor of Nathan being in league with pirates caused her stomach to drop. If the government believed the lies being spread about her husband, Nathan’s life could be in jeopardy from hanging. No. She shouldn’t tell Julia. She’d only be perpetuating the rumor. Nathan was not a pirate.
Images of him engaged in swordplay flashed through her mind. He was adept with a sword, even more so than her brother or Anthony, who’d attended Britain’s Naval Academy. His hair and shirt had ruffled in the wind as he’d attacked and parried. His leg muscles strained against his breeches.
“Lottie?”
She shook her head to clear it.
Julia repeated her question. “Are you overheated?”
“No.” Lottie fought the urge to press a hand to her cheek.
“Your color seems high.”
Lottie’s stomach dipped. “It’s merely the tropical climate. I daresay, it agrees with me.” She changed the topic. “Is Captain Fielding with his ship?”
“Indeed. He’s overseeing some repairs.”
They turned up the shell-lined path to the Cockleshell Inn.
“It’s too stuffy inside this time of day.” Julia fanned her face with her hand. “Would you care to sit on the porch? I’ll have some lemonade brought outside.”
“Sounds delightful.”
Paul set the packages down and pulled out a handkerchief from his pocket. He dusted off the chairs before moving the foodstuffs inside to the kitchen.
They sat in the shade, and Lottie removed her bonnet to let the gentle breeze cool her hair. Julia did the same.
“Have you heard from Nathan?”
“Only another excuse about why he couldn’t come calling.”
Julia stared at her. Her lips parted, then closed as if reconsidering what she might say. She turned her gaze to the boats bobbing in the ocean, rising and falling like a steady breath upon the waves. “Do not be discouraged.” Her brown eyes returned to Lottie’s. “There is an overwhelming number of tasks to be supervised on a plantation. Especially when one is gone for more than two months at a time.”
“You don’t believe he’s avoiding me?” Lottie hated how insecure she sounded, but she needed to know the answer. Franny was too young and inexperienced to offer her any sound advice. Julia, however, was married and worldly. Lottie picked at a snag. “Nathan didn’t wish to be married. I’m afraid he sees me as an added burden.”
“Very few men wish to be married.” Julia’s lips curled in a haughty sneer. “Until we convince them otherwise.”
Lottie sighed. “There are times when I catch him looking at me with warmth in his eyes. It fills me with hope that maybe we can grow to love one another.”
A woman arrived with a tray of lemonade. She handed a glass to Lottie and another to Julia.
Lottie sipped the sweet-and-sour liquid. “Other times, it’s as if he’s given me the cut direct. He behaves detached and aloof, as if he wants nothing to do with me.”
Julia turned her head, distracted by a customer entering the inn. Her graceful silhouette instilled the impression of royalty.
Lottie raised her chin and straightened. She’d been taught the same posture, but it felt forced, unlike Julia who managed a natural look.
Gulls glided over the waves, crying their wails of longing.
A drip of condensation from the glass dampened Lottie’s fingers. “I know nothing of marriage other than my parent’s example.”
“Every marriage is different.” Julia’s eyes grew distant. “Jere and I were fire and ice, or yin and yang as the Chinese would say. We were passionate with youthful ardor, but also naïve and stubborn.”
“I see.” Lottie hid her disappointment by sipping her lemonade. The brotherly kisses Nathan pecked on her forehead could in no way be described as youthful ardor. Maybe talking to Julia about this had been a bad idea.
“Initially, you stumble around as you learn about each other, blundering as often as succeeding. But eventually, you fall into understanding.”
“How am I to learn about my husband when he’s not around?”
Julia arched a brow. “Maybe you must first learn about yourself?”
Her words hit their target. Lottie had always been under her mother’s wing. Now she had her freedom, and what had she done with it? At the tiniest struggle, she’d reverted to her old ways of hiding. She’d hidden in her cabin seasick, and now that they’d landed in St. Kitts, she’d remained holed up in her chamber at the inn waiting for her husband to come calling. A beautiful tropical island lay before her, yet until today, she’d confined herself to the security of her room. She’d been fearful of venturing out on her own.
Maybe God wanted her to learn she didn’t need to be reliant upon any one person. All her life she’d been dependent upon her mother, and now she’d acted as if Nathan was supposed to take over the role. A light dawned in her mind. She didn’t need Nathan to be her mother, nor did she want him to be.
“There is something I think you should know.” The cords on Julia’s slender neck grew taut. “I had hoped Nathan would have explained this to you, but it’s obvious he didn’t.”
Lottie’s chest clenched, and the men’s voices from the market echoed in her mind. He’s doing business with a pirate king.
“I think when you hear this, it will put some of the pieces together.”
Lottie held her breath.
“Nathan is a very private person. I may be betraying his trust by telling you this.”
Lottie swallowed, and her stomach twisted.
“As you know, the island can be ruthless at times, and Nathan has seen the worst of it. His father moved here back when King George the Third began his reign. He married Miss Rebecca Lawton of Bristol and brought her to the island. They had three children, Amory, Nathaniel, and Katherine.”
Lottie smiled. “He named his vessels after his siblings.”
“They were a very close family. Hardworking, but jolly people. They teased each other mercilessly, but it was all in fun.”
“I’d like to meet them.” She smiled at the thought of Nathan jesting with his siblings.
“If only you could. I do believe they would take to you instantly.”
Lottie’s smile fell. “What happened to them?”
“The fever. Katherine came down with it first, followed by Amory and Mrs. Winthrop. Each was a painful passing.”
“I had no idea.” Lottie shook her head and bit her lip to keep it from quivering. Poor Nathan watched one loved one die, only to have to go through the entire heartwrenching scenario a second and then a third time.
“Nathan’s father turned to the bottle to numb his despair. Six months later, he died when his wagon rolled over on him.”
Lottie gasped.
“Nathan became the sole provider for over thirty slaves and the caretaker of over three hundred acres of damaged crops. He worked day and night to bring the cane back and get the land to produce. Because of his efforts, not one of his slaves went hungry.”
A servant appeared at the door. “Miz Fielding? There’s a guest who’d like ta have a word wit ya.”
“Tell our guest I’ll be right with him.” Julia rose, and Lottie did the same.
“Thank you”—she forced the words around the lump in her throat—“for telling me this.”
“I wanted you to know so you’ll understand.” Julia’s eyes darkened. “Nathan’s staying away because he’s afraid he’ll lose you too.”
Tears burned behind Lottie’s lids, but she dared not cry and appear weak. “Do you mind if I
stay out here a bit longer? I need to sort out some things.” A thunderous wave crashed in the background. “Maybe I’ll go for a stroll on the beach.”
“If you do, take Paul with you.”
“I have Franny. Today was her morning off. She went to the docks to visit with Cook, but she should have returned by now. I don’t want to tie up your servants.”
“It’s best to have male accompaniment to be safe.”
“As you wish.” Lottie flashed her a wobbly smile.
The fresh air and invigorating walk were exactly what Lottie needed to clear her head. After hearing Julia’s words, Nathan’s rejection no longer stung. If she’d been through all he’d suffered, she’d be afraid to allow her heart to love again too. Time was what he needed.
In the interim, she would no longer keep herself hidden away. She didn’t know how many days God had determined for her life, but she certainly wasn’t doing herself or God any good staying confined in her room.
Paul and Franny hung back a few paces to allow her space, since very few people roamed the beach. A dark cloud hovering overhead seemed to keep most folks away. She picked up a few shells to keep and listened to the rhythmic crashing of the waves. She stopped at the marina to see Cobble and a few of the Katherine’s crewmembers, including Charlie, but he spoke mostly to Franny. A light rain shower cut their visit short.
Her bonnet had dampened by the time they entered the side door of the inn. Julia called to Paul from the kitchen, asking him to assist a servant in the stockroom. He excused himself from Lottie and Franny and headed in the direction of Julia’s voice.
The steps to her room stood before her, but Lottie couldn’t force her legs to climb them, not after her taste of freedom. There had to be somewhere else she could go. Julia had mentioned a study where she could find books to read.
She ambled down the hall, Franny on her heels, peeking into open doors until she found a room with a large desk and, behind it, shelves of books. They stepped inside. Franny waited by the door as Lottie scanned the embossed titles. She ran the pad of her index finger down the leather spines of several books. The Pirate’s Treasure stood out among the titles. How funny to discover the same book she’d opened the night she’d been in Anthony’s study. She pulled it out and skimmed the first page. It truly was the same novel. This time there was no candle, no glasses of brandy, and she was already married, so nothing could go wrong.
Lottie waved for Franny to have a seat before she pulled out a chair and sat down to read. She was deep into chapter four when a burly man’s voice raised her head.
“Well, what have we here?” The man’s frame filled the doorway. “Two lovely ladies sittin’ pretty.”
His beard held bits of bread caught in the scruff, and she could smell the spirits on his breath. He sauntered into the room, and another thinner man followed him in.
Lottie’s heart picked up its pace, but she calmly set the book aside. The lean man smiled at Franny, and several of his teeth were missing. Franny scooted closer to the wall.
Lottie rose, keeping her back straight, and pointed to the hallway. “Gentlemen, the tavern is the next doorway on the right.”
“Oh, we’re not lost. We had to stop when we saw such beauties idlin’ the day away. I couldn’t help but wonder if you were lookin’ for some entertainment?”
“I don’t believe my husband would appreciate my cavorting with another man.”
The man’s brows raised. “And who might your husband be?”
“Nathaniel Winthrop.”
A loud raspy guffaw rattled in the man’s chest, echoed by the hissing laughter of his companion. “Winthrop hasn’t taken a wife. I’ve seen him working his fields every day since the Katherine’s arrival. A warm-blooded man doesn’t hole his woman up at an inn. If he had a wife, he’d have her by his side. Keep her under lock and key, especially a fine white woman.” He put a hand to his chest. “Name’s Cyrus McCurdy, and this here is Jack Reid. I’m the estate manager down at the Swanson plantation in Sandy Point, and Mr. Reid is its overseer.”
Lottie kept a chair between, issuing them a curt nod.
“May I say what a pleasure it is to meet you.” His gaze roved over her form.
Mr. Reid scooped up Franny’s hand and kissed the back of it. Franny tugged it back, but the man held firm.
“Unhand my maid.” Lottie’s voice boomed in true Lady Etheridge fashion.
Mr. Reid froze and released her maid’s hand.
A flash of movement caught her attention behind the man, and the long tip of a saber slid by his neck to tap the underside of his chin.
“Mr. McCurdy and Mr. Reid.” Julia stepped forward and spoke in a deadly calm voice. “You will unhand my guests and leave them be.”
Mr. McCurdy raised his palms. “We were only havin’ a bit of fun. We weren’t causin’ any trouble.”
“You, gentlemen, must be leaving. I don’t want you in my sight.”
“But ya have the best scotch in all the islands.” McCurdy’s brows angled together. “And what will Mr. Reid do without his whiskey?”
“He should have thought about that before he laid his grimy fingers on my friends. Now be gone before I have Paul toss you out on your ear.”
Paul’s dark frame shadowed her in the hallway.
The two men slithered past, and Paul watched until the front door closed behind them.
“Are you unharmed?” Julia swept her gaze over Franny, then to Lottie. The woman had remained so calm—so strong.
No wonder Nathan wanted her to be more like Julia. She licked her dry lips. “Just a bit shaken.”
Julia handed the sword to Paul, who sheathed it and left. “Some islanders have poor manners.”
Lottie eyed the doorway where Paul disappeared. “Can you teach me how to defend myself with the sword?”
Julia’s chest rose and fell with her sigh. “Fencing is a challenging sport, especially for a woman who can be overpowered. I don’t have the time or patience required to teach you.”
Lottie’s chest fell. “I see.”
“What you need is to learn how to shoot.” Julia arched a brow.
“You know how to shoot? You’ll teach me?”
“I’m an excellent markswoman, but, no, I will not teach you.”
Lottie’s brow furrowed.
“Nathan will.” She issued a crisp nod and swept from the room.
Chapter 16
I fear he isn’t pleased with me and that is the reason he has stayed away. Lord, must I always fall short of other’s standards? Thank You for loving me for whom I am.
~ Scribbled in Lottie’s prayer journal
A footman knocked on the bed chamber door as Franny brushed Lottie’s tresses up into a simple twist. She allowed some curls to fan out on top like a fiery bouquet. Lottie pinched her cheeks for color and peered into the looking glass one last time. The pale blue gown that had arrived yesterday with the others fit her perfectly and amplified the blue of her eyes.
Would Nathan notice? She inhaled a steadying breath. “He’s here.” She squeezed Franny’s hand. “Say a prayer all goes well.”
Franny’s dimples flashed. “I will, mum.”
Lottie itched to run down the stairs. Instead, she lifted her head and straightened her spine with as much poise and grace as she could muster. Her stomach somersaulted with each step.
Nathan stood over a table in the taproom with a large map spread out before him. He pointed at a spot, and Captain Fielding leaned in closer to inspect. Nathan’s light tan jacket hugged his shoulders. The light from the window illuminated his profile, and the crease between his thick brows suggested he was deep in thought.
She hadn’t realized how much she’d missed him. His air of authority, ruggedness, and vital power all drew her like a shelter from a storm. Funny how he had become her comfortable sense of familiarity in this new strange world.
“The pirates probably hid behind San Dominique, raided the ship, and sailed to Barataria to auction the c
argo.”
Lottie stepped forward and folded her hands in front of her.
He glanced up and spied her. A slow grin spread across his face as if he were pleased to see her. His gaze swept down her figure and back up again. “You look lovely. Matilda knew exactly the right fit and colors for you.”
Exhilaration swept through Lottie. She’d send Matilda flowers later for her excellent work.
He inhaled and released a breath with a puff of his cheeks, his face losing its pleasure. Whatever was wrong? Her hair? Her gown? Was she not standing straight enough? Out of habit, Lottie hid her hands among the cotton folds of her dress.
“You’re a bit overdressed for what I was thinking.”
Her pale blue walking dress wasn’t an evening gown. It seemed perfect for strolling the streets of Basseterre or even the beach. She raised her brows. “What did you have in mind?”
“A shooting lesson.”
She inhaled a gasp. How had Julia worked such magic this quickly?
He extended a hand. “We shall make do.”
Her fingers slid over his calloused palm. She shivered, not out of disgust but because of the sheer masculinity of him, a man who worked with his hands. Her fingers felt like fragile twigs in the coiled power of his grasp.
He tucked her hand into the crook of his arm and escorted her outdoors. The evocative scent of last night’s heavy rainfall mixed with the salty tang of the ocean air.
Paul stroked the horse’s nose and held the reins as Nathan aided her up into the seat of the two person gig. He strode to the other side, climbed aboard, and accepted the reins from Paul.
Nathan spurred on the horses, and their small gig bounced down the road away from the crowded streets of Basseterre. He glanced her way. “It seems you’ve taken to the island air. You’ve a bit more color and a glow about you.”
His words spread warmth through her chest. “It’s more likely due to the fact that the floor no longer rolls beneath my feet, and my breakfast stays in my stomach.” She lifted her face to the sun peeking out from behind the clouds. “St. Kitts is beautiful. Have you ever seen a sun so bright, waters so blue, or even fields so green?” She gestured to some wild orchids growing alongside the road. “Even the flowers are more colorful here. Julia took me to the market, and the people there were delightful. They made me this.” She held out her arm for him to admire her bracelet of tiny strung seashells.