I took a deep breath, considering her words. “I respect you, Gaby. I don’t want you to feel like I’m just another two-faced man that will say or do anything to get what he wants. And if I’m being truthful, I don’t want to feel with you like I do with everyone else, repeating the same lie over and over because it’s the only way for me to be accepted. You make me want to be myself. When I’m with you, I’m just who you see now, not a prince or a diamond dealer. I’m just me, the man who wants to be near you, and I can only do that by being as honest as I can.”
“I still know you are hiding something,” she answered, searching my gaze. “I can see it in your eyes. I know I don’t have the right to learn all of your secrets, but I know they are there. They haunt you, and they haunt me too because I have this inexplicable need to want to know everything about you,” she confessed, her eyes drifting from me.
My hand lifted, the back of my fingers stroked her cheek slowly. Her gaze returned to mine as I let out a heavy breath. “Even with this overwhelming need I have to be myself with you, I can’t show you who I really am, Star. No matter how bad I wish I could. If I told you all of my truths you would think I’m crazy.” I cradled her cheek and kissed her lips as my chest constricted. “Maybe I am,” I whispered against her mouth, and pulled away. “For thinking I have a chance with you while being here, because no matter how much I want you, no matter how much I need you, I’ll still have to go back. I’ll have to leave you, and I fear after meeting you a part of me will remain here with you, whether I want it or not.”
My lips claimed hers and I took everything I could from her. What the hell was Gaby doing to me?
*
We walked into the apartment an hour later, and Gaby went straight to the closet. I walked towards the room, taking my clothes off until I stood naked in front of the bed. I served myself a glass of scotch and took a sip.
A loud gasp called my attention to the closet door. Gaby’s eyes were wide. “Why are you naked?”
I frowned. “I sleep naked, don’t you remember? Besides, you didn’t seem to mind when I was holding you in my arms last night?”
“Well, um, yeah but that was when I thought we had already slept together.”
My lips twitched. “You mean when you thought I had ravaged you against the wall?”
“HA, HA!” she crossed her arms. “Can’t you put something on?” Her eyes instinctively went over my chest and abs, then my hips. She tensed, straining not to look between my thighs. I repressed a smile.
“I have nothing to put on other than my regular clothes.”
“What about underwear? Can’t you put on boxers or something?”
I crossed my arms too. “I don’t use underwear.”
Gaby stomped towards the bed mumbling something unintelligible. My gaze roamed her body and I frowned. She had on a pair of cream shorts, a white tank top with an off the shoulder sweater and fuzzy sucks. Her hot pink glasses were back, and her hair was picked up in a high ponytail.
“Do you need so many clothes to sleep?” I said, lifting the sheet and getting into bed as she sat on top of the comforter.
She gave me a side-glance. “I like sleeping with the air very low, and being warm in bed.”
I smirked. “You seemed pretty warm in my arms.” I pulled at the sweater and kissed her bare shoulder.
“Actually, yes I was, but that’s not going to happen again because I don’t sleep naked with men I just met.”
“Can’t you at least take off the sweater?” I whispered against her neck, kissing the curve while my fingertip traced lines over her shoulder. Gaby shuddered.
“No, Mr. Happy Hands. Now, scooch to your side. I’m already sleeping in the same bed as you while you are butt naked. Don’t push your luck.”
I grinned and cupped her cheek, turning her head towards me, I claimed her lips. She tilted her head to deepen the kiss but I pulled away, sliding to my side of the bed.
“I’m sorry, I can’t kiss you from all the way over here.” I stated amused, while she looked at me as the shock replaced the haze in her eyes from my kiss. I grabbed the small decorative pillows from behind me, and placed them in the middle of the king size bed, dividing it. She narrowed her eyes at me, my lips twitched.
“You know, you could enjoy all of this.” I uncovered myself, gesturing at my naked form to show her exactly what she was missing. “But I just met you, so you can’t have my body.”
The pillows suddenly began to fly towards me, slamming against my raised arms as I tried to protect my head. I laughed. Loudly. Gaby pulled on the throw at the end of the bed and covered herself, resting her back to the tufted headboard.
“Hey! You are not sleeping under that thing.” I wrenched the throw from her while she complained, and threw it to the floor. “Get under the covers,” I ordered.
“Wait, but I—”
“Now, woman!”
“Ugh! I hate you.”
I lifted the covers, and repressed a smile when her gaze inconspicuously went over my body before she got in. I fixed the pillows behind her and slid next to her. “Why do you need your glasses for bed, anyway?” She lifted her hand, and I suddenly realized what she was holding. “You read comic books before bed?”
Gaby shrugged. “It’s not just any comic book. This is issue #285 of Action Comics ‘The World’s Greatest Heroine’. It’s the one where Superman introduces Supergirl to the world. So, respect.”
I chuckled and pulled her to me, snuggling her close. For a moment, I expected her to tense or pull away, but to my surprise, her body curled into mine as she rested on her side. My lips curved into a smile, enjoying the feeling of her against me—even if she was wearing everything she found in the closet. The book she held seemed really old, and a special plastic cover protected it.
“Are you going to read it to me?” I asked, resting my chin on the curve of her neck as I looked over her shoulder.
“Okay!” she squealed excitedly, and tucked her legs under her as she began to read.
*
My lids fluttered open but there was no light to be found. The room was engulfed in darkness as the night followed its course, yet I was awake. I blinked and looked beside me, realizing what had woken me up. Gaby was snuggled against me, in a fetal position on the bed. Her head rested on the tip of my shoulder. I smiled and turned towards her, my hand reaching for her waist to pull her in. When my palm touched her, I noticed her clothes were gone. She was naked, and as happy as that should have made me, I knew it wasn’t because of me.
She had experienced one of those panic episodes again.
My chest constricted.
I lifted the cover and saw her shorts, tank top and sweater, crumbled up at the bottom of the bed. I sighed and pulled her close, nonetheless. The moment her cheek rested on my chest her tears dampened my skin. She was crying. My heart tore when I lifted her chin and saw the drops of her pain slide down her skin. My arms wrapped around her, holding her closer than it should be possible, and as our naked bodies flushed together the only thought in my mind was, what was torturing her like this?
“Star,” I whispered, trying to bring her into consciousness.
“I’m sorry.” Her lips brushed my skin as she hid her head in my neck, and a sob caught in her throat.
My hand gently caressed her back, trying to calm her. “Why are you crying?”
“I don’t know if I can do this by myself.” Her head reluctantly lifted, sparkling eyes filled with fear and pain as she looked at me. “I used to be alone, no family, no one I could count on until… until he found me. He became everything to me.” A new sob escaped her. “Now he’s gone, and I don’t know if I can… I just—”
“Shhh, it’s okay, Star.”
I tucked her head in my neck again, and held her fiercely against me. My heart ripped in two. Who was this man that meant so much to Gaby? The knowledge both enraged me and distressed me at the same time. I wanted to be everything to her. That was my place, not his. Never his. I
needed to mean everything for her, and I would.
“I’m here for you. You are not alone anymore. You’ll never be alone again. I swear it.”
I didn’t know why I had said that to her, I knew that as soon as I found Lorcan I would have to leave. My brothers needed me… my mother needed me. I couldn’t stay here. Everything was a mess in our kingdom, and I knew there was a war brewing. A war, that one-way or another, we would need to win. But I still wanted to be here with Star. I would find a way to be here for her…
No matter what it cost me.
The thin rays of sunlight that filtered through the opening of the curtain, fell over Gaby’s hazelnut hair, highlighting the burgundy and golden tones within it. My finger lazily curved, wrapping a strand around it as I played with it. She was still asleep in my arms, the tears no longer fell from her eyes but the ache they had caused in me remained. Seeing her cry like that had done something to me. If I could only figure out why it was that she affected me this way.
My arms tightened around Gaby, and while the scent of her seeped into my nose I wondered, how was it possible that simply holding her this way could feel so humbling? Having her in my arms empowered me, and destroyed me all at the same time. I never realized there was a different type of intimacy I could have with a woman. Sex fed my body and the carnal need that thrived within me every day, but the connection Gaby offered me in the few moments we had shared was something else entirely. It fed a deeper need that I never even knew I had. I wanted more. I craved it.
“Good morning, Star,” I whispered, feeling her stir in my arms. “I don’t know what to tell you, but you kind of attacked me last night. I knew it was only a matter of time. You wouldn’t be able to resist my charming personality, and my hard, sizzling body for much longer. You can start drooling now. It’s okay, I’ll understand.”
Her lips curved into a lazy smile against my chest, while her eyes remained closed. “You are an egotistical, pretentious, moron.”
My chest shook with laughter under her cheek and she snuggled closer, evidently enjoying the feeling. I turned our bodies around and she whined. I grinned, fixing us so I was laying half on top of her—making sure that certain “parts” of our bodies didn’t touch—and remained still, admiring her. Her lids slowly lifted and as her eyes settled on mine, they sparkled.
“My Star…” I said softly, brushing my lips against hers, and causing her eyes to close. “You are so beautiful, it hurts.”
My lips closed over hers and something inside me took over. The kiss was nothing like I had experienced before with her or anyone else. Her mouth moved with mine and I felt it in every cell, and every inch of my skin, inside and out. I kissed a trail down her neck, and for the first time since I met her, I had no intention of doing anything to her, other than breathing her in. I inhaled, my nose traveling down the curve under her ear, and placed a small kiss on her shoulder. When my gaze returned to her eyes, they were filled with emotion.
“Thank you.”
I frowned. “For what? Taking advantage of you every chance I get? You are very welcome.”
She cupped my cheek, and I unconsciously leaned into her touch. “For last night. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get emotion—”
“No.” I shook my head. “Don’t do that. You have nothing for which to thank me or apologize, for that matter. You don’t even have to explain, although I do wish you would let me in.”
Gaby took a ragged breath and nodded slowly. Her thumb caressed my cheek as I often did with her. “I never met my parents, they abandoned me when I was a baby.”
Fuck. I wasn’t expecting her to say that. My arms tightened around her, protectively.
“I grew up bouncing from foster home to foster home, each worse than the last. But a week after I turned six, God sent me someone to look over me.” Tears gathered in her eyes and a nostalgic smile curved her lips. “My Uncle Rob.” A tear fell from her lashes and I kissed it off her cheek. I couldn’t stand to see her cry. “He was actually my Foster Dad. From the moment I looked into his eyes—at the social worker’s office—I felt safe. He had the biggest, most endearing smile I ever saw, and with my very first step into his house, something told me I’d found a home.”
A chuckle left her as more tears fell. Her eyes drifted behind me, as though she could see the memory playing in front of her. “He has the biggest collection of comic books in his office. During my first week with him, I began to sneak in there in the middle of the night to read them. I remember he had a few locked away in glass cases, and of course, those were the ones I wanted to read. I would take his keychain from the kitchen—where he kept the little lock key—and spend hours in there. He discovered me one night, and I was terrified. I thought, ‘here it comes, I’ll get at least a slap for this.’”
Gaby’s eyes returned to mine, and when she shook her head more tears escaped her. “Uncle Rob laughed. He actually laughed, as though he was amazed at my boldness, and carried me in his arms, taking me to the big wingback chair he had next to the window. He turned on the lamp, and began to read issue #285 of Action Comics, ‘The World’s Greatest Heroine’ to me. Every night after that, he would read me a comic book before bed, and I grew up to love those magical worlds as much as he did.”
My throat constricted, and I forced myself to breathe deeply, fighting the emotion that came over me at the sight of her, broken.
“He was my everything. The single most selfless and caring man I ever met, until…”
“Until he left,” I finished for her, finally understanding.
The pain seemed to ooze out of Gaby as she looked at me. A sob caught in her throat and she had to stop herself. It took a few seconds before she could speak again. “Until he died.” My eyes widened, I wasn’t expecting that. “Uncle Rob died two weeks ago.”
“I’m so sorry, Star.” I brought her closer, as though my arms would protect her from the pain. I kissed her temple gently, while she clung to me. “What happened?”
“His heart just stopped beating.” Her voice trembled and my gaze returned to hers. “He wasn’t really an old man—he was barely fifty-five years old—so the doctors weren’t sure what the cause was. It wasn’t a cardiac arrest. He just stopped… living. Maybe he was just done with life, I guess.”
“I’m truly sorry.” I kissed her softly, hating the taste of tears on her lips. I never wanted her to cry again.
“I spread his ashes around the magnolia trees in Central Park, they were his favorite.” She added, with a small smile although it was tainted by heartbreak.
“The comic book you read to me…” I let the question hang in the air.
She nodded. “It’s all I have left of him. The apartment was rent controlled, and the lease was in Uncle Rob’s name. After he died, the landlord jumped at the chance to charge ten times what we paid, and since I couldn’t afford to live there anymore, he threw me out.”
“What a bastard. I’m sorry.” Suddenly, something she said returned to me. “You said he has the biggest collection of comic books, not he had. What happened to them?”
A sob caught in her throat, new tears arose. “I lost them. When I came home after work the locks had been changed, the landlord had two suitcases outside the door with my clothes, and whatever else he thought was mine in a leather bag. The police were there, and I wasn’t even able to enter the apartment one last time to take his things out of there. I only have this comic book because I had it with me that day, in my purse.”
I looked at her shocked. “Gaby, why didn’t you tell me this before? How long ago was that?”
She blinked, confused, and shook her head. “A week ago? I don’t know. Days have blurred a bit for me since he died.”
I kissed her lips and stood from the bed abruptly. “Get dressed, quickly. We have to go.”
“Wait, where are we going?” She asked, startled, while I walked to the bathroom.
I turned by the door, looking into her eyes. “To get your comic book collection back.”
<
br /> *
“Okay this is the place. What are we going to do now?” Gaby asked, as we stood in front of a small brownstone building. She kept looking at the main entrance nervously.
I gazed around the building and saw the metal railings at the side. I grinned. “Does your apartment have access to the fire escape?”
“Yes. Why?”
“Which one is it?” I inquired, walking towards the alley. She followed.
“Second floor, third window on the right.”
I stood under the metal structure and silently cursed. The ladder was stuck at the top of the first floor, making it unreachable. If I were my normal size, this would be a walk in the park. No matter, I had this.
“Ash…” Her warning voice returned, but it was tinged by fear. “What are you going to do?” Her uncle’s leather bag hung from her back, and the two suitcases she had were set on the ground next to her.
I ignored her, walking back a few steps and ran. I jumped, stepping on the trashcan to my right, and flipped in the air, gaining altitude. Gaby gasped as my feet landed on the bottom of the ladder and I grasped it, my weight made it slide all the way down to the street.
“How the hell did you do that? Are you a ninja or something?”
I smirked, still holding the side rail as I extended my hand to her.
“Let’s go get them.”
“What??” She whisper-screamed. “I thought you were going to talk to the landlord and pay him off or something. This is your plan? We are going to steal them?”
I stepped down and took her hand in mine. “You can’t steal something that is already yours.” Kissing her cheek, I lifted the suitcases, nudging her towards the ladder.
We got to her floor and stood in front of the vast, arched top window of her apartment. It was in deed an architecturally beautiful building. Gaby stepped past me, and her palms went to the base of the window frame, she hit it twice. The window opened, sliding up about two inches. She looked at me and a gleam of excitement mixed with nostalgia entered her eyes.
“Don’t ask.” She pushed the window all the way up and I pulled her aside, sticking my head inside.
Broken Kingdom (The Winter Court Chronicles Book 2) Page 14