Memories of May

by Juliet Madison

  I coughed and could hardly see, but crouched down and grabbed hold of my mother, the one who had given me life, so that I could hopefully save hers.

  ‘May! Get out, go!’ she yelled. ‘I can hardly move! You go, now! I’ll try to catch up.’

  ‘No!’ I pulled at her. ‘I’m not leaving you.’ I put all the strength I could muster into draping her over my shoulder and half-dragging half-carrying her out of the burning-hot kitchen, as flames chased and teased around us. Something exploded nearby, and we fell to the floor at the kitchen entrance. I looked behind to see nothing but thick cloudy red and black smoke, and with that dedication Jacques had spoken about in the letter, I grunted and lifted mother, and stumbled closer and closer to the open door that was now fuelling the fire with the rush of air coming in, but was our only escape.

  I kept my eye on that light, and didn’t blink despite the smoke until we made it out, stumbling further on the porch and then running and stumbling out onto the lawn. I helped Mother further away from the house until we collapsed on the side of the road. As I watched our family home become engulfed in flames, my heart pounding and my eyes in shock, I looked away, to my left side near the letterbox, where a piece of paper wafted up and danced in the turbulent air around us.

  ‘Oh, Grandma.’ Olivia reached up and wiped a tear from Mrs May’s eye. ‘You don’t have to tell me any more. I’m sorry I made you bring that up.’

  She sniffed. ‘It doesn’t matter, dear. Memories are memories.’

  ‘I think I remember you talking briefly about the fire, but I didn’t realise how traumatic it must have been. And what caused it? Oh, don’t worry. You just rest now.’ She leaned over the bed and patted her grandmother’s cheek.

  ‘Mum’s tea towel, we think,’ she said. ‘She fell due to illness and the pot was knocked over, the tea towel had been over her shoulder and must have brushed past the flame on the stove.’

  ‘She was lucky you were there. You showed such determination.’

  ‘Anyone would have done the same.’ Mrs May licked her lips. ‘Water please?’

  Olivia filled a glass and brought it to her grandma’s mouth. ‘There you go.’

  She drank it all.

  ‘I don’t know what happened to that letter,’ she said through tired breath. Once they took us to the doctor and I went back to the wreckage afterwards, it was nowhere to be found. Probably got carried away by the wind and either burnt, or made its way to the ocean.’

  ‘But it stayed in your mind, that’s the main thing.’

  ‘Yes indeed,’ she whispered. ‘Memories stay, no matter if they are beautiful or difficult. If only we could choose to keep just the good ones.’

  Olivia nodded with a bittersweet smile as she stroked her grandma’s hand while she fell asleep, then gathered her daughter’s art materials and they made their way back to the car to drive home, knowing how lucky she was to have a home to go to, and a daughter to tuck into her bed.

  Chapter 8

  Later that night, Olivia woke from a nightmare and didn’t want to go back to sleep. She picked up Joel’s book from her bedside and read some more, this time from the beginning. Forty-five minutes later she was still reading when a yawn erupted and didn’t seem able to stretch wide enough to relieve her tiredness. Without thinking, she got out her phone and texted Joel … he didn’t have kids so would probably have his phone turned off each night like her other single and non-parent friends did. She knew she could always text April in the middle of the night and not disturb her, and often, late at night or during the occasional night-waking episodes were the only times she got a chance to be sociable, and it was usually when thoughts of things to say appeared, so she just went with it.

  Hi, really enjoying your book so far. Not that one should enjoy reading about what you went through, but you know what I mean. I hope. It’s well written and interesting. Nice work—Olivia.

  She placed a bookmark in chapter five and put the book under her alarm clock, which she groaned at when she saw the time. So much for a good night’s sleep.

  Her phone lit up and vibrated with a low-volume ping.

  She squinted at the screen.

  Can’t sleep? I had a nap before my Wednesday night class, bad idea. Still awake. Obviously. Extra coffee for me tomorrow. Thanks for your feedback. Glad you are enjoying the book. See you Friday … I’m thinking nachos?

  Well, well, well. At least she didn’t wake him up. But if she did, served him right for keeping his phone on. She replied: Nachos? Do you want me to work my way through all the unhealthiest and fattiest things on the menu before I’m allowed to revert to my usual chicken salad or soup?

  He replied: Something new each week, remember. Our deal. I also have another idea, a new challenge for you …

  And that would be?

  I’ll tell you on Friday, he replied with a wink emoticon.

  Olivia hated surprises, and she hated challenges. But for some reason she was looking forward to finding out what this one was.

  * * *

  As she walked along the main street and the crisp ocean breeze cooled her skin, Olivia flicked one end of her scarf around her neck. Winter was coming, and she couldn’t be happier. Cosy nights snuggling with a blanket and a good book on the couch after Mia went to bed, a warm cup of tea, and some chocolate—perfect. But nights these days were spent organising her notes for her grandma’s book, so she didn’t know when she would have much time for relaxing, except in the few minutes before sleep claimed her at bedtime. But she did need to finish reading Joel’s book, and wanted to do so as soon as possible so that she could understand more about his experience and why his book was such a hit.

  She waved to the short and sweet woman at the chemist as she walked past, who had provided her with much medical advice over the years for Mia. She nodded a hello at the hairy guy who owned the takeaway shop, who had provided occasional emergency meals when she couldn’t be bothered cooking after a busy day at work. And she smiled at Jonah when she arrived at Café Lagoon, who despite having provided her with countless coffees, teas, cakes, and delicious healthy meals, was about to provide her with something new at Joel’s request.

  ‘Burger?’ he asked when she approached the counter, noticing that Joel wasn’t there yet.

  ‘Not today,’ she replied. ‘I’ll just have the, ah …’ she perused the blackboard menu. ‘Um … nachos,’ she said with a clearing of her throat.

  ‘Say again?’ he asked.

  ‘Nachos,’ she spoke louder.

  ‘Nachos? Wow, you really are going out of your comfort zone, Olivia.’

  Her face warmed, despite the chill in the air. She didn’t know why she sometimes got embarrassed or nervous for no reason. Maybe that was why she didn’t often stray from her routine or way of doing things. It was safe and comfortable to stay the same, to keep the status quo.

  ‘Make that two nachos, extra sour cream please, mate.’

  Olivia turned her head and her gaze crashed into Joel’s chest, well-used muscles giving shape to his snug-fitting top. She glanced up and met his ocean-blue eyes, and was reminded of Mrs May’s description of William’s being like blue diamonds. Joel’s weren’t as bright as that, they were deeper and darker in parts, a few flecks marking the lighter blue strands, giving a depth to his gaze as he smiled at her.

  ‘Not for me,’ Olivia said to Jonah. ‘I mean, just the normal amount of sour cream. Not extra. Thanks.’ Her scarf end fell across her chest and she flicked it back over her shoulder, accidentally flicking Joel’s face on the way. ‘Oops, sorry.’

  He flinched a little with an amused smile. ‘Which table shall we sit at today, somewhere different?’ He gestured to one near the front.

  ‘Too cold,’ she said.

  He shrugged. ‘Lucky you have that scarf then.’ He accepted the table number from Jonah and took it to the table near the front, which had a nice view of Miracle Park across the road, and the beach and ocean on the horizon. ‘Nachos will warm you up.’ H
e pulled back the chair for her.

  ‘You don’t have to do that,’ she said. ‘Pull the chair out, I mean.’

  ‘Too late. Anyway, don’t men in books do things like that?’

  ‘Depends what books you’re talking about. In many books,’ she leaned closer to him, as though about to share a long-held secret, ‘women actually pull their own chairs out for themselves.’ She feigned a gasp.

  ‘Ha, I bet they do.’ He pushed her chair back in. ‘Go on then.’ He waited for her to pull her chair out and sit, then sat down himself. ‘Well, my gentlemanly gesture was going to be the segue to my new challenge I have for you, but I’ll have to think of something else now …’ He tapped at his chin.

  ‘Oh?’ she said. ‘In that case, my apologies. Please do think of something else.’ She twisted her lips into a curious smile.

  His eyes went distant for a few moments, and then they brightened, not quite to ‘diamond’ status but to ‘ocean on a sunny day’ status. ‘Right then,’ he said, clearing his throat and pushing his chair back to stand.

  Had he had enough and was going to leave her here to eat two plates of nachos on her own?

  Was he simply going to order another ‘something new’ for her?

  Was he about to …

  Oh. Huh?

  Joel crouched down onto one knee. She noticed him wince slightly but then he settled into his rather strange position like he was going to tie his shoelaces, or …

  ‘Olivia Chevalier,’ he said, taking her hand in his and looking up into her eyes with sincerity. ‘Will you …’

  What the hell? Her eyes bulged and she glanced around at the customers in the café, who were smiling and pointing. What the hell?

  ‘Will you …’

  ‘Say yes!’ someone called out.

  Her heart pumped fast and her cheeks flushed.

  ‘Will you … please help me up?’ He grasped her hand firmly and made a show of pretending to try to stand.

  She released her hand from his and covered her face. ‘Oh you, ha-ha, very funny.’

  He stood and grinned.

  ‘You said no?’ the person called out? ‘Why? A perfectly acceptable bloke gets on his knee in public to propose and you don’t have the decency to say yes?’

  Joel faced the customer. ‘Not to worry, she just needs to think about it.’

  ‘No, no, I don’t need to think,’ she said to the customer, ‘I, he was just …’

  ‘Tying my shoelaces,’ Joel said.

  ‘That was so embarrassing,’ she whispered through gritted teeth as he took his seat opposite her again.

  He chuckled.

  ‘And what does that have to do with this challenge thing anyway?’ she asked, waving her hand about in circles.

  ‘Would you say a proposal like that would be something book-worthy?’

  She narrowed her gaze. ‘Possibly. I mean, in the right type of book. But it’s a bit predictable And I would have to actually know the person a bit better before accepting their offer to spend the rest of my life with them.’

  ‘But for a brief moment, you felt something … different, right? Something a little exciting?’

  ‘Embarrassing, yes, exciting, no.’

  ‘You know what I mean.’

  ‘Well I didn’t expect to sit down for lunch and have a guy get on one knee, that’s for sure.’

  ‘Then my work here is done.’

  She questioned him with her gaze.

  ‘Consider that an example of a book-worthy moment.’

  ‘And your point is …’

  ‘I was thinking about what you said at class the other night, that you don’t think you have any book-worthy moments in your life.’ He made quotation marks with his fingers. ‘Look, I like to teach people to not only write about their lives, but to live them. And whether you like it or not, I am going to help you, my dear, to have a few book-worthy moments of your own.’

  Okay, she had to admit, now it was getting interesting, though her cheeks were still hot. ‘That does sound rather intriguing, but what do you mean exactly? You’re just going to surprise me with random things like fake marriage proposals and whatnot, to add some excitement to my boring, predictable life?’

  ‘No, we’re going to make a list. Like a bucket list, but a book-worthy moments list. If you were writing your memoir, what things could you say that you’d done? What adventures would you have had? What new experiences would make for interesting reading, or at least interesting living? What memories do you want to make this May, Olivia?’

  She thought about it for a few moments, then Jonah brought their meals over. ‘Nachos for the happy couple.’ He winked. ‘Extra sour cream for the groom.’

  ‘Oh, stop.’ Olivia chuckled and gave Jonah a friendly punch on the arm.

  She started eating, half because she was hungry and it was lunchtime, and half because she wanted to avoid answering his questions.

  ‘So, anything you haven’t done that you would like to?’

  She crunched into a corn chip and wiped a bit of sour cream from her lip. ‘Nope. Just write my grandma’s book and give my daughter a good life.’

  ‘Apart from that.’ He held up his hand when she went to speak. ‘Wait, I know, you don’t have time, right?’

  She shrugged. ‘Pretty much, but it depends what kind of activities you’re talking about. The fake marriage proposal didn’t take much time so anything of similar duration should be fine.’ She flashed a cheeky smile. ‘Oh!’ She held up her fork. ‘I’m reading your book. Does that count as something new?’

  ‘Hmm, it could. Okay, let’s count that as item number one. Purely for research purposes and as an example.’

  ‘Of course. Okay, I will try and finish it over the weekend.’ She ate another mouthful. ‘And how many items are supposed to be on this list?’

  ‘One for each week of the course? Book makes one, so we need five more.’

  ‘I can’t really think of anything, it depends what sort of book, like if it was a crime novel, I don’t exactly wish to have the book-worthy moment of finding a dead body.’

  He laughed. ‘Of course not, but … what makes a crime novel exciting? The mystery, the suspense.’

  ‘So I need to find something to do that is mysterious and suspenseful.’

  ‘Like …’ He tapped his fingers on the table. ‘Some sort of treasure hunt.’

  ‘And where or how would I find or take part in a treasure hunt?’

  Joel rubbed his chin. ‘I will just have to make you one.’

  Olivia laughed. ‘You will make me a treasure hunt?’

  He held out his hands. ‘Why not? It’ll be fun.’ He grinned. ‘Oh, and the treasure hunt can lead to another book-worthy moment, which will have to be a surprise, so you’ll have to trust me.’

  She shifted in her seat and took a sip of water. This was getting a bit too far out of her comfort zone. ‘Um, I would rather know exactly what I am agreeing to before I agree to anything.’

  ‘I understand, but part of having an adventure is not always knowing what’s around the corner.’

  ‘How about we think up some things I do know about and will agree to, and then I’ll consider letting you do the treasure hunt and surprise.’ That was about as much as she could do.

  ‘Fair enough. Do you get out of town much?’

  ‘Only if I have an appointment, or need to do some major shopping, or something for Mia.’

  ‘No holidays?’

  She shook her head. ‘Not really, we just do various fun things in the school holidays.’

  ‘So you don’t ever just grab a tent and camp somewhere nearby under the stars, ponder life, have some nature time?’

  She laughed. ‘We go to the beach and play in the sand and water, go to the park, but camping? Why sleep on the ground when I can sleep in my bed and have electricity and bathroom facilities?’

  ‘But you’ve been camping, right? I mean, everyone’s been camping at least once.’

  Olivia gave
a feeble shake of her head.

  Joel’s eyes bulged. ‘Never? Wow.’ He got out his phone and tapped something into it.

  ‘What are you doing?’ she peered across the table at the notes app on his phone.

  ‘Camping, item number two.’

  She stiffened. ‘Oh hang on, I have to agree to the things on the list.’

  ‘Yeah, but you’ve never been camping? It’s like a rite of passage for human beings. It’s non-negotiable, my dear, you are going camping.’

  She wriggled in her chair and adjusted her scarf. ‘But Mia, she would have to come, or stay with my mum, and she already looks after her a lot. And I can’t go on my own, there could be serial-killer campers around, and also—animals, and creatures, and bugs.’

  ‘So take a friend. Unless you want me to join you?’ He smirked.

  ‘Certainly not,’ she remarked.

  ‘I’ve been looking around the nearby areas, and there’s a great camping spot up in the hills, there’s an area that’s targeted at families and they check and scan all campers’ IDs before allowing them to set up, so it’s safe, and they also have good bathroom facilities so it’s not like you’re completely on your own there.’

  ‘It’s May. It’ll be cold.’

  ‘Go in June.’ He chuckled.

  She shook her head at him. ‘It’ll be colder.’

  ‘Exactly. More adventurous. Bring your onesie or some kind of warm sleepwear.’

  ‘What makes you think I own a onesie?’

  ‘Do you?’

  ‘Definitely not. Oh wait, maybe I could buy one, and that could be something new for my list.’

  He shook his head slowly. ‘Nice try, bookgirl.’ He dug into more of his nachos.

  ‘Anyway, I can’t camp. It would take too much organisation. I don’t have time or equipment.’