by Hart, Rebel
I glared at her. “That’s okay, there are plenty of garbage cans out there already, that I think have been useless in football covered.”
“You’re a fucking asshole.” Jane tossed me a rage-fueled glare and then turned it to Dax. “And if you don’t back the fuck away from me, I’m going to knee you so hard in your balls your children won’t be able to have children.”
Dax leaned in a little further. “I like em feisty, darling.”
I grabbed Dax’s shoulder and pulled. I may not like Jane, but I couldn’t just stand by and watch him harass her. “You’ll have plenty of time to gaggle at her later. You know the Bullies have shit defense.”
“They’ve really cleaned it up. I wouldn’t underestimate th—” Jane started to speak but I held my hand up in her face. She let out a hiss and stopped talking. I was shocked, but then she grabbed my wrist, pushed my hand into Dax’s face and shoved us away. She ducked out from under Dax and rushed to the other side of the room. “I hope you both tank your stats on Sunday.”
She walked away and Dax flipped around and looked at me like he was going to bite my head clean off. “What the fuck?”
I rolled my eyes. “Can you tone it down at least? If we end up in the news because of some harassment lawsuit, I’m gonna kick your ass from here to next year.”
“I need my space.” Dax flexed as though he had something even remotely interesting to me to show off. “She’s never gonna go for me with you hanging around.”
“Correction, she’s never gonna go for you. I’m not even sure she’s capable of attraction.”
“Oh, she’ll go for me, whether she likes it or not.” He cracked his knuckles like he was preparing to split a log in half.
Dax grossed me out to a degree I could barely deal with. It was annoying when he wasn’t there because he was integral to our team, but I didn’t feel so icky when he wasn’t there. I felt conflicted. For as much as I couldn’t stand Jane, I knew she didn’t deserve to be attacked by a creep. I couldn’t decide what my obligation was to keep Dax’s junk in his pants. It was just another reason why having Jane around was a nuisance. If she wasn’t there, I wouldn’t have to be worried about keeping Dax on a tight leash.
“Just stay out of my way, okay?” Dax tapped me on my chest and wandered off in the same direction as Jane.
Jane was so much more trouble than she was worth. The sooner she tapped out the better. I’d let Dax make her uncomfortable, but I thought of my sisters and even Vick and made a small promise to myself never to let him get too out of control. I followed after them and found them in the weight room. Dax had closed in on her yet again, but to her credit, she had a 10-pound weight in her hand and she was swinging it as though it was light as a feather, right at Dax’s head, whenever he got too close.
Finally, she whipped around. “Look! I have some actual advice for you. Do you want it or am I gonna have to kick your ass?” Maybe I didn’t need to worry about Jane; if anything it looked like I needed to worry about Dax. Jane’s eyes flitted over to me and her already downtrodden expression worsened. “I have advice for you too, but I doubt you’re interested.”
I nodded. “That’s the first thing you’ve said since you got here that I agree with. I don’t need advice from someone who doesn’t know shit about the male body.”
Jane held up her middle finger at me. “I have a master’s degree and four-plus years of experience at an NCAA college. I know plenty about the male body.”
Dax raised an eyebrow. “Is that right?”
Jane swung her weight at him when he got too close to her and he pulled his head just out of the way. “Knock it off.”
Dax snickered and shook his head as an evil, disgusting grin warped his face. “I sure do love it when you fight.”
I looked over at Dax with an equally irritated look on my face. “Knock it off.” I glared back at Jane. “You think that running around with a bunch of horny, frat boys has anything to do with professional football? You’re in the big leagues, and you shouldn’t be.”
“I’m exactly where I should be, and just because your dick shrivels up around women who actually know their shit, is no reason for you to discredit what I went through to get here.”
My skin was tingling with anger. “What you went through? I’ve woken up at 4:30 am every single day since I was fucking 9. I pushed, fought, ran, tackled, and jumped my way through thousands of football games to get here, only for the wet blanket formerly known as my coach to shove a pair of tits in my face and tell me I have to listen to them.”
“I put in early mornings too!” Jane’s voice was elevating now and she was taking steps towards me like the alpha wolf trying to back down a rebel in its pack. “I went to every single one of my dad’s football games. Every. Single. One. I’ve been studying football since I was old enough to do so. When I was a coach at UNC, there wasn’t a single injury the entire time I was there and we didn’t lose more than three games.”
I crossed my arms. “Are you suggesting that was you and not the years of hard work they put in?”
Jane flailed her arms out dramatically. “It’s a tag-team effort, just like anything. Coaches and players work together to make a team function. That’s how it’s done, that’s how it has always been done.”
“No.” My voice was booming through the weight room as well now, and some of my other teammates arriving for the day had gathered outside and were watching the fight unfold. “How it’s always been done is male coaches and male players work together to make a team function.” I took a step towards her. “I’m the star player on this team, not some experiment for a little girl trying to prove a point. You. Don’t. Belong. Here.”
Jane didn’t back down. She continued to close the distance between us. “I’m an experienced coach, not some babysitter for an egotistical prick with a woman-complex.” She pouted out her bottom lip. “What’s the reason, little John? Mommy paid more attention to your sisters than you?”
Hearing her bring my sisters and mother into the argument made me want to swing a weight at her head. I stepped so close to her that we were nearly nose-to-nose. I put my finger in her face. “Keep my family’s name out of your nasty, fucking mouth.”
Jane tilted her head to the side, not seeming at all phased by my intimidation. “Why don’t you make me, mama’s boy?” Her voice was low and resonant.
My fists were clenched at my sides. Never before had I ever considered hitting a woman, but the way Jane hiked up her britches made me want to go toe-to-toe with her. The way we were staring down one another made me feel like we were going to cause an earthquake any second. Her jaw was clenching and I could tell that she was just as infuriated as I was. If she would just leave, we wouldn’t have to continue to plague one another’s lives.
Just leave.
Before either of us could do or say anything else, I was yanked away from Jane just as she was yanked away from me. I kept my eyes locked with her and she did with me as well. We were like two rabid dogs being broken up while making sure the other one knows that the fight isn’t over.
Jim pointed out the door and looked at Jane. “You need to go cool down. You can’t just stand in here insulting the starting quarterback.”
I was shocked and it looked like Jane was as well. Neither of us expected that he would defend me.
Jane’s jaw was through the floor. “But he—”
Jim cut her off. “And you certainly can’t sit and argue with the head coach.” Jane tried to protest again, but Jim’s voice barreled over hers. “Go. Cool. Off. Now.”
Jane stormed past Jim, through the onlooking crowd of players, and out of sight. Even Dax seemed surprised. Everyone was standing in complete silence, but inside I was reveling in the fact that Jim was finally on board. It seemed he’d come around to the idea that his sister shouldn’t be on our team and was ready to start making tough, real-coach decisions again. He let out a deep sigh and his face turned from fury to sadness. I could only imagine how hard it would
be to have to fire his sister, but he did it to himself. He never should have allowed her on the staff in the first place.
I took a step forward. “Hey, Ji—”
I didn’t even get his name all the way out. He whipped around, grabbed the collar of my shirt, and slammed me back against the wall. My back seared with pain and my chest threatened to cave in under the force of his arm against my collarbone. None of the other players moved to help me. Not once in the entire time that Jim had been head coach had he ever gotten aggressive with us.
“What the fuck?” My voice was strained to get out through Jim’s tight grip. I looked into his eyes and couldn’t help but feel like I’d made a horrible mistake.
“You had better watch who the fuck you’re talking to.” His voice was a scary, low, even tone with no wavering or lack of conviction. The rage wafting off of him was so prevalent that I didn’t dare interject. “If you ever, ever, get that threatening with my sister again, I will rip off your throwing arm and shove it down your goddamn throat. I don’t give a fuck about being your friend, about being your coach, or even about spending a life in prison. If it even looks like you’re thinking about treating her like that again, you will have to be delivered to your house in a glass with a curly straw.”
Jim let me go and stood back and it felt like my heart was going to blow a hole in my sternum. I had never had another person handle me like that. I didn’t know what to do.
Jim turned his back to me so that he could face the rest of the team. “Starting tomorrow. The only person you will be able to have questions for, about Sunday’s game, will be Jane. Does anyone have a problem with that?” It seemed like everyone was holding their breath. Whether or not anyone was willing to admit it, for the first time ever, we legitimately feared Jim. After a few moments of silence, Jim continued. “Good. If at any point in time this becomes a problem for you, be sure to let me know.” He looked back over his shoulder at me. “I’d be happy to find you somewhere else to play football.”
Without another word, Jim walked out of the room, with the team parting for him like the red sea as he moved. When he was gone, they all turned and looked back at me. I didn’t know what to say; no one did. Jim had just made a very public statement that the game had changed forever, and it had me questioning whether or not this game was still for me.
6
Jane
I could barely contain the electricity charging through my body. My first game as a professional coach, I couldn't believe it. I thought about every day I let my dad drag me out of bed on a Saturday before the sun had even come up to go running while holding a football to get used to how it felt in my hands. I thought about every time I tried out for the powderpuff women’s football league in my school district, only to be repeatedly told I was ‘too tough and serious’ for what they were looking for. I thought about how many times I walked into the Sports and Rec office at UNC and demanded to speak with the football coach about serving under him until he finally let me just to get me to shut up. I’d worked harder to get to this moment than I had worked at anything in my entire life and I wasn’t about to let anyone ruin that for me, John included.
“Hey there, pretty lady.” I entered our team’s locker room and Dax was already standing there ready and waiting. He walked over to me and brushed his hand across my cheek. “Don’t you look lovely today?”
I slapped his hand away. “Haven’t I already told you to keep your hands off of me?”
Dax grabbed my waist. “Oh come on. It’s okay for you to admit you want me. I won’t tell anyone.”
I held back a gag reflex. “I’m gonna have to pass.”
It wasn’t as if Dax was unattractive in the conventional sense. He was a typical jock. An even six feet, short-cut, sandy brown hair, a nice build that was thick enough to serve him well in his position as a fullback, but still had lots of tone and definition to his arms and abs. If he weren’t hands-down, the most obnoxious, handsy, frustrating man I’d ever met in my life, I would probably consider him something above the scum of the earth. Unfortunately for us both, that wasn’t the case. Of all the guys that I wanted to learn my schedule and show up excited and ready to go, he was the one I least wanted.
“Can we just focus today? This is a big game.” I started to walk past him, but the second I was at his side, his hand whipped back and slapped my ass. “Stop!”
I turned to punch him, but he dodged my fist. I raised my fist to strike again, but the doors to the locker room opened again and Jim entered along with a handful of the other teammates. Dax slunk down and moved away from me. I wasn’t quite sure what happened, but in the remaining days leading up to the game, I noticed the team behaving a bit differently around Jim. I’d already told him that I didn’t want him fighting my battles for me and to make sure he wasn’t forcing the team to pretend like they respected me, but I wasn’t sure he was listening. I knew I was his baby sister and that he was just looking out for me, but if the guys only paid any attention to me because they had to, then what was the point?
The excitement grew as the rest of the team arrived and got changed into their uniforms. When John arrived, I hardened myself for whatever emotional or verbal abuse he was preparing to throw at me, but he mostly just avoided me. I couldn’t help but keep an eye on him as he changed into his uniform. There was no need to wonder why he was so arrogant. He was a hell of a ballplayer and good-looking to boot. It was sad that it was wasted on someone with such a nasty attitude. He took off his t-shirt and I felt my cheeks warm. He had the kind of body that only mannequins and stone statues had. Firm pecs, clean-cut abs, and my personal favorite on a man, defined and muscular arms. It really was a shame.
He looked over his shoulder suddenly and caught me staring. “What?”
I had to make up a lie and fast. “I was going to give you a piece of advice and then realized you probably wouldn’t take it.”
He pulled his shoulder pads over his head and then put on his jersey. “You’ve got that right.” He dropped his clothes into his duffel bag and then walked away.
“Dick,” I murmured under my breath. I could admit he was gorgeous, but I’d have to be drunk and high before I’d admit he was attractive. Men like that weren’t worth a woman’s time.
I couldn’t help but beam with pride at Jim as he roused the team with his coach’s speech. They had a certain respect for him. That’s what I wanted. I wanted them to sit on the edge of their seats as I spoke. Even John watched Jim with interest and regard. I had worked just as hard as he had. Why did the fact that I was a woman make so much of a difference? It wasn’t fair.
“Alright, bring it in!” Jim set his hand out and the team jumped up and huddled around him.
I stayed standing off to the side even though the other coaches and staff that were present jumped in. Isaac happened to be standing near the edge of the pack and noticed that I didn’t pull in. “Coach?”
The few players around him turned and looked at me and I started to look around me assuming they were addressing something else.
“What the fuck are you looking for?” one of the third-stringers asked.
Isaac took a few steps to the side and smiled. “Bring it in.”
I felt like I was going to melt and die. I kept waiting for Isaac to rescind his offer, or maybe as I stepped towards him and apprehensively pushed my arm in alongside the others, he would shut me out, but he didn’t. He closed his eyes and gave me a genuine happy nod, and then turned his attention back to Jim. I looked over at him as well and saw that he was watching the interaction and waiting. He saw that we were finished and started to hoot and holler; the Knights’ call. I, and the rest of the team, joined in shouting and jumping and then Jim threw his arm in the air and we broke.
It felt like no time had elapsed before we were rushing out onto the field under the roar of North Carolina’s adoring fans. Adrenaline surged through my body, threatening to kill me from overload and as the players all made themselves comfortable on the sidel
ines, Jim wrapped an arm around me.
“That was pretty cool,” he said.
I nodded. Cool didn’t begin to describe it. Even if it was just one guy, there was one guy on the team who actually considered me his coach, so much so that he made sure to include me. Take that and shove it up your ass, John.
We started the game on a high, but just as I had predicted, we were underestimating the other team’s defense. Even Jim had made a few comments about how all we needed to do was dominate offensively, and I knew it wasn’t going to be that easy. Any team who is known for a crappy defense is going to come to a playoff game having worked on that more than anything else. John kept thinking he was going to make quick, easy tosses to Jack downfield, but he’d been sacked three times waiting for Jack to clear up. Even when he tried to swap to throwing to Benton or tucking the ball to Dax to try and run through, they were getting tackled every which way. Worse than that, the opponent’s middle linebacker seemed to have it out for John. He’d come in hot on all three sacks and jumped high for the tackles and led with his head, almost as if he was trying to force a helmet-to-helmet. Despite the fact that Jim nearly popped his own head off freaking out at the refs, they didn’t seem to care and they were doing nothing about it. I didn’t like John, but I didn’t want to see him end up with a career-ending head injury, or worse, so when halftime rolled around and we were down by two touchdowns, I decided to swallow my pride and approach him.
He turned to look up at me and his eyes fluttered a bit. I immediately went into defensive coach mode. “I need a medic!”
John shook his head and held up his hand. “I’m fine.”
I crouched in front of the bench he was sitting on. “You’re not fine. Look at me.”
He tried again to focus on my face, but his pupils couldn’t find their center. Jim walked over and looked down at us. “Concussion?”
I shook my head. “I don’t think so, but he’s taken some blows.” I looked at him. “I would let him go back out there but—”