Courage, sweetling. I am here with you.
For which I'm grateful to the depths of my being, I told him as we elbowed our way through the throng to the center of the park, where a ring of druidic stones had been arranged in a style reminiscent of Stonehenge. Stone benches dotted the inner perimeter of the ring. Four of the benches were filled with various people. The fifth was empty. In front of it stood an officious-looking man, who frowned when he spotted us.
"Portia Harding, stand forward," the man said.
I stepped clear of the crowd, into the circle of stones, Theo next to me in the shadow cast by one of the tall stones. I wanted badly to take his hand, but wasn't comfortable with such a show of affection in front of so many hostile strangers.
"Know ye all that this hearing commences in the sovereign year one thousand fifteen in the eightieth age."
Ten-fifteen? You're older than that!
The Court calendar differs from the mortal one. It is divided into ages, each of which contains roughly fifty-six thousand millennia.
I did a swift mental calculation, pleased that the years worked out to be the approximate age of the Earth.
"Behold ye now, her most gracious of majesties, the mare Suria."
A smiling, petite blonde in a gauzy green and gold sundress emerged from the crowd, laughing at a quip someone called out. She bestowed her smile on Theo and me, taking a seat on the empty bench.
"Behold ye now, her most gracious of majesties, the mare Disin."
The mare we'd met with earlier marched out, her expression grim. She didn't look at me, simply strode over and took her seat next to the first mare.
"Behold ye now, her most gracious of majesties, the mare Irina."
The last mare took me by surprise. I was expecting another woman of younger years, but the bent-over, frail woman who hobbled from the masses was clearly in the latter years of her life…if that was possible with an immortal. She, too, settled on the bench, her milky blue eyes searching me curiously.
"This hearing does not concern your champion," Disin said, frowning at Theo.
"With respect, your grace, Portia is my Beloved." Theo stepped forward slightly, careful not to go beyond the edges of the shadow. "I cannot allow her to stand trial alone."
Around us, the crowd gasped, little whispers hissing in the air as people digested the information that Theo and I were bound by blood.
Was that the wisest thing to say? I asked, forcing myself to relax as the clouds overhead grew darker. The three mare consulted one another. It seems to me that just gave more fuel to the fire.
Theo's laugh was mirthless. Those three women are the pinnacle of power in the Court of Divine Blood. The only one who has more is the sovereign itself. There is little that escapes their attention. The fact that I am now a Dark One may not have been common knowledge, but I assure you they were aware of it the moment we stepped into the Court.
The mare ended their consultation.
"You may remain," Disin said, giving Theo a regal nod. "But you will not speak to the charges in Portia Harding's place. It is for her alone to do so."
He bowed, murmuring his thanks.
"You are charged with the destruction of the virtue Hope," the first mare said, her face somber. "How plead you, Portia Harding?"
"Not guilty." There were other words that wanted to burst out, such as a declaration that I do not kill people, not for any reason, and certainly not for anything so frivolous as the ability to control weather, but I pushed them down. I doubted if such an outburst would do good.
The silence that followed my statement hung heavily for about five seconds, then the whispers behind us began fast and furious.
The sky grew darker despite my attempts to keep my emotions in check.
Disin narrowed her eyes. "Do you refute the fact that you intend to grant exculpation to the nephilim named Theondre North, the same man to whom you are bound as a Beloved?"
Strangers be damned. I took Theo's hand, sucking in a deep breath as I tried to calm my nerves. "I do not deny that I have discussed the subject with Theo. I do deny the implication that I murdered Hope in order to bring such a thing about."
"Do you deny that just one night past, you sought the company of a demon lord?"
"We didn't seek him—"
"Do you deny that you had an audience with the demon lord, the premiere prince of Abaddon, the lord Bael?"
Several people gasped behind me. Theo's fingers tightened around mine. He wanted badly to say something but was bound to silence by the mare's order, an order that evidently covered not giving me advice as to what I should say in answer to the ridiculous charges being bandied about. "The circumstances of our visit to Bael are not of our doing. We were summoned there by Bael."
More gasping and a couple of outright cries of horror. I kept my eyes fixed on the three women in front of me, drawing strength from the touch of Theo's hand.
Disin leaned forward, her eyes as cold and hard as steel. "Do you deny that you have said to the nephilim Theondre North, on several occasions since taking on the mantle of virtue, that you would do anything to restore unto him that which he does not possess?"
"His soul," I said, waving my free hand in an expressive manner. Overhead, thunder rumbled ominously. "I was talking about his soul, which was ripped from him by Bael, all because he protected me from the demon who was part of the third trial. A trial, I might add, that is sanctioned by this Court!"
Theo's fingers tightened around mine. I glanced at him, nodding abruptly at the warning visible in his eyes.
"I beg your pardon if my comments seem rude," I said, aware of the hostile looks I was getting from the people surrounding us. The mare's faces were for the most part impassive, but it was evident they had come to this hearing with their minds made up. "But I dislike being asked to justify my actions when I have done nothing wrong. I did not ask to become a virtue—Hope made me one without my knowing anything about it. I did not murder her, nor do I know who did, or why. I did not seek audience with a demon lord; it was forced upon me. It's true I have sworn to restore Theo's soul to him, but that is a matter between him and me, and I fail to see how it has importance to anyone else here."
"You dare speak thusly to the mare?" The officious little man who had introduced the mare leaped up from one of the benches, his face red with anger.
Theo's fingers tightened until his grip was almost painful.
"I mean no disrespect, but I will not tolerate a kangaroo court—"
"Silence!" Disin bellowed, her voice echoing off the trees. "We will confer."
"But I haven't been allowed a chance to defend myself properly," I started to say, but was cut off when Disin barked at me.
"I said silence!"
Theo's thumb rubbed on the top of my hand, an iota of comfort in a sea of distress. The three women leaned together.
They're going to throw us in that Akasha place, I said to Theo. His fingers twitched in response. Around us, the hum of conversation was conducted in hushed whispers, but vehement nonetheless. I know you can't answer me, but they can't stop me from talking to you. I'm sorry if I made things worse, but you have to see that I couldn't just stand here while they twisted everything around.
He may have been bound to silence, but his emotions were mine to read, and I took some small comfort in the pride that tinged his concern.
"Portia Harding, your insolence does you no credit, nor will it be tolerated," Disin said as the mare presented a solid front.
Thunder rumbled even louder, the sky so dark it looked like twilight even though it was the middle of the day. I took another deep breath, and calmed my wildly beating heart, hoping it was enough to keep a storm from lashing out against the people who were trying us.
"Against my better judgment"—Disin glanced for a moment at the white-haired mare—"I have been persuaded that the evidence against you is not sufficient to banish you to the Akasha. However, until the matter of the virtue's murder has been explained to o
ur satisfaction, we cannot allow you the freedom to harm others."
I bit my lip to keep from shouting that I hadn't harmed anyone, and had no intentions of doing so.
"It has been suggested that you undergo the fifth trial now in order to determine the purity of your being. If you pass, you will be allowed to leave the Court until such time as a tribunal determines the truth of the virtue's death." Disin clapped her hands, and a small boy emerged from the crowd. The boy bowed to the three mare, then turned and bowed to me. He couldn't have been more than eight or nine, but the look in his dark eyes was one of ageless wisdom. Whatever he was, he certainly wasn't an innocent child. "Proctor, begin the trial."
The boy looked at me for a moment before gesturing Theo away. "You cannot aid her in this test, champion. You must move out of her reach."
Theo's voice was warm and reassuring in my head. I will not leave your side if you do not wish for me to do so.
It's OK. I tried to put a lot more confidence into my words than I felt. I doubt if they will do anything too heinous in front of all these witnesses.
Theo moved away reluctantly, stepping back to stand with the onlookers. I bit my lip nervously, rubbing my hands together as I wondered just what this trial was going to consist of. "Er…forgive me for asking, but how on earth do you determine the purity of someone's being?"
"It's simple," the boy said, smiling a gap-toothed smile that did little to lighten my heart. He spread his hands wide, then brought them together so quickly that his movement was unseen. "You die."
The blast from his hands hit me with the force of a runaway bulldozer. I fell backward, the sound of my own terrified shriek mingled with Theo's hoarse roar ringing in my ears as I left everything I knew behind.
Chapter 15
"So this is limbo," I said, looking around. I wasn't much impressed.
"The word 'limbo' is a mortal term used by some religions to express the concept of the Akasha, something most people have difficulty understanding," the small boy next to me said as we walked down a rocky hillside. He waved his hand at the sparse landscape around us. "The Akasha is more than limbo. It is a place few visit, and from which even fewer return."
"Really? What sorts of things do people have to do to get sent here?"
The boy's face gave away no emotion. "The Akasha is a place of punishment, Portia Harding. The ultimate place of punishment. To my memory, the sovereign has granted respite from its confines to only three people."
"Only three in that many millions of years?" I shivered. "Right, so note to self—don't do anything to piss the mare off enough to be sent here."
"That would be a very wise policy to follow. If you would walk this way."
I obligingly followed him as he carefully picked a way through a rocky stretch that led to a faint path. "The last thing I remember before I found myself here was you saying I had to die. Are you implying that I'm dead?"
He tipped his head to the side for a moment, then continued walking. "Do you feel dead?"
"No. I feel annoyed." Ahead of us, in a shallow valley, a large outcropping of rock jutted out of the earth. The wind whipped around us, cutting through my clothing and stinging my flesh with tiny little whips of pain. "And cold. What are we doing here?"
"This is the site of your trial. As you implied, it is difficult for the layperson to weigh the purity of someone's being."
I stumbled over a clod of earth, quickly regaining my balance, but looking warily at the rocky outcropping as we slowly wound our way through the deserted valley floor toward it. "So you decided on a trial by endurance, is that it? If I make it to those rocks there in one piece, I pass the trial?"
To my complete surprise, the boy nodded his head. "Yes. That's it exactly."
I slid a few feet down a graveled slope, my arms cartwheeling as I struggled to maintain my balance. "You're kidding!"
"No, indeed I'm not." He stopped next to a spiky, stunted, leafless shrub, and nodded toward the outcropping. "I can take you no further. The rest of this trial you must conduct on your own. The circle of Akasha there is your goal. Good luck, Portia Harding."
The unspoken words, "You're going to need it," hung in the air, but I ignored them as I eyeballed the rocks approximately three hundred feet away. I decided a little mental support was in order, and reached out my mind to Theo. I'm not so proud I can't admit that I'm a bit frightened by this. They can't do anything to permanently harm me, can they?
The wind was all the answer I had.
Theo? Are you there?
My words evaporated into nothing. It was as if he didn't exist.
"Why can't I talk to Theo?" I asked the boy.
He seemed to know that I was referring to our mental form of communication. "Such a thing is not possible in the Akasha."
"Lovely. So, I just walk there? That's all I do?"
"Yes. Once you reach the circle of Akasha, the trial will be over."
"And I'll be sent back to the Court?" Something wasn't right here. It couldn't be this easy. Could it?
"That depends on you," he said enigmatically.
I opened my mouth to ask him a question or five, but decided that stalling would do nothing but give me a case of exposure in this horrible cold. I rubbed my hands on my arms briskly, nodded, and took four steps forward.
From the depths of the circle of stone, three shapes emerged. They were black and curiously flat as their silhouettes stood starkly against the white stones. At the sight of them, my feet stopped moving, and I found myself suddenly drenched in a cold sweat.
"Uh…who are they?" I asked over my shoulder.
The boy smiled, his eyes sad. "Hashmallim."
Hashmallim. The word struck a chord of dread deep inside of me. Theo had spoken of them as being a danger to Sarah and me, and now I was expected to walk right up to a couple of them and…do what? Talk to them?
"What do they want? Why are they there? Am I supposed to do something with them?"
"You must walk to the center of the circle of Akasha," the boy repeated. "The trial will be over if you do that."
I swallowed down a thick lump of fear. "I don't suppose there's an alternative to this trial?"
He didn't answer.
"There never is," I muttered to myself, taking a deep breath as I tried to calm my frazzled nerves. A quick glance overhead confused me—where was my friendly little cloud that rained down destruction on those who angered me?
"Your Gift has no power here," the boy answered, just as if I had asked the question out loud. "I should add that there is a time limit to this trial. You have exactly two minutes."
I opened my mouth to protest, but the sight of those three black figures standing next to the rocks dried up the complaint I was about to make. Dread and horror, sickening in their intensity, washed over me. It took some doing, but I managed to get my feet moving again.
"Let's reason this through," I told myself, my eyes fixed on the three still figures as I slowly approached them, my steps lagging noticeably as the seconds ticked by. "Given the premise that virtues exist, we must conclude that other people have passed these trials, thus they can't be lethal."
"Only mortals must pass the trials," the boy called after me. "Immortals simply apply, and are interviewed for the positions."
"Not helping!" I yelled back, my thoughts sour as I forced myself to take another step. The sense of dread increased with each footstep, swamping me with the knowledge that I was doomed, Theo was doomed, everyone I ever knew or loved was doomed. I wanted to sit down on the rocky ground and sob myself into insensitivity, that certain was I that it was all for nothing.
"Get a grip, Portia," I lectured myself, fighting with the bile that wanted to rise as I watched the three black figures getting closer. What I thought were three people standing in silhouette turned out to be partly correct—they were people-shaped silhouettes…but nothing more. They weren't people standing in shadow. They weren't darkened versions of people, with vaguely discernable features. No, th
e Hashmallim were just inky black voids, as if they were two-dimensional representations of people. They were all the more frightening for the impossibility of their appearance. "There are approximately twenty steps left. You can do it one step at a time."
I took another six steps forward, then froze into place at the sure knowledge that I was going to my death. "No," I told myself, fighting down the mass of emotions that roiled inside me. "This can't be lethal. It's just an illusion, like so many other things."
The things I'd believed to be illusions had turned out to be real, my mind argued with me, so why should this be any different?
"Time is passing."
"Yeah, yeah."
Ahead of me, the rocks with their three horrible figures loomed before me. The best offense is defense, right?
"You're not so bad," I yelled at the three presences. I wrapped my arms around my waist and made myself take several steps forward. "You may think you can frighten me to death, but I'm tougher than I look! So you can put that in your big, scary pipes and smoke it!"
The rocks loomed above me as I approached with dragging footsteps. I panted with the effort to keep from vomiting, my brain shrieking warnings about self-preservation. I ignored them, taking another couple of steps forward until just a few yards separated the rocks and the Hashmallim from me. They were vague, black shapes now, shifting in opacity and shape, occasional glimpses of haunted, pale faces flickering into view before melting into nothing.
I wanted to run as far away as possible. I wanted to cry and curl up into a fetal ball. I wanted it all to go away.
I wanted Theo.
The Hashmallim seemed to block the path through the stones.
"What do I do now?" I yelled to the boy.
"Simply go through them to the center."
"Simple, my ass," I grumbled to myself, desperately trying to keep my feet pointed toward the horrors in front of me. "There's nothing simple about this. I doubt if the word exists around here."
I took another step forward. The nearest Hashmallim seemed to swell up, looming over me, drenching me in fear, loathing, terror, and a hundred other emotions that had me seriously wishing for death.
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