by Lisa N. Paul
“His name is Decker, and you know damn well that’s who I’m talking about. So don’t play that game with me, missy. He hasn’t been to the gym in three days. He never misses three days. And he hasn’t called.” Pacing the first floor of her two-story house, April let her mind wander to the sexy man who had gone missing since their encounter only a few days earlier. “He basically told me he was going to call me. He even winked at me.” April sighed.
Giggling, Rori asked, “He did? Was it cute? I feel like that gesture is only seen in text messages and reruns of Seinfeld. “
“Nope, he absolutely winked, and it was… sexy. His face got all soft and dreamy.” April closed her eyes picturing Decker’s long, thick lashes fanning as he quickly lowered his lid. “Anyway, after he winked and said he’d call—okay, he didn’t actually promise—but when I told him I wouldn’t call him, he said… wait, oh fuck!” April’s head thumped directly into the window pane. The coolness of the glass felt nice in contrast to the flames licking up her neck and cheeks. “Do you think…?” She couldn’t finish her sentence. Even thinking it made her sick.
“Do I think what, chica?” Whatever had been distracting Rori before was no longer an issue. “April, what’s the problem? Wait, you actually told him that you weren’t gonna call?” The musical sound that was Rori’s laughter vibrated through the phone. “Oh, that’s right! You told him about the phone call/orgasm connection. Do you know that you’re a freak?” Her friend could barely form the question through her own hysterics.
“It’s not funny, Aurora,” April chided, unable to keep the smile from breaching her own lips. “Grrr, okay, it’s a little funny,” April conceded. “But it’s also pathetic. I’m twenty-eight years old. Why is my mother still screwing with my sex life?”
“Why are you letting her?”
“I’m not letting her,” April countered feebly.
“Good.” A smile could be heard in Rori’s voice. “Then call him.”
“Aw, hell no,” April snapped into the phone. “Have you lost your mind? What if Mom’s been right all these years? I make the call and poof, no orgasms.” April rubbed her fingers over her closed eyes in an attempt to relieve the tension headache that was building in her skull. “No way, I can’t risk it.”
A loud sigh came through the phone, followed by a pause. April knew her friend quite well. Rori was collecting her thoughts, measuring her words, and weighing the outcome of what she was about to say. “April, we’ve known each other a long time, so please know I say this with love, but the only times you’ve reached orgasm from something other than your own hand is when your phone is on vibrate and placed between your legs.”
April’s eyes popped open at the candid comment. “Rori, that is not true! You and I both know that the voice mail kicks in before any pleasure can be reached. Sheesh!”
Laughing, her friend continued. “Okay, fine. All I was trying to say was you haven’t been with a man since Ben. That little bastard never worried about your satisfaction, and you followed all of your mother’s rules with him.”
It was true. April had fallen for Ben Spears in the tenth grade and followed every one of her mother’s make him love you rules and look what they got her. Sure, she’d had her first climax with Ben—after all, he had been the first boy she’d ever fooled around with—but after a while, he stopped worrying about her release and only focused on his own. April had had orgasms in the years she was with her husband, but it was always her own doing that brought the release.
“Try something new,” Rori nudged. “Call him.”
“I’ll think about it,” April conceded as she climbed the stairs and made her way to the master bedroom.
“Sure, you will.” Rori laughed.
The women said their good-byes, and April sat on her bed, replaying the conversation in her head. Rori wasn’t wrong, but old habits were hard to break. April chose the option that fell straight in the middle.
*
HAVING JUST STEPPED out of another scalding shower, his third of the day, Decker ran the towel over his hair. Is today over yet? He stepped into fresh sweatpants and a tee shirt before heading into Charlie’s room to check on her. He popped her favorite movie in the DVD player, kissed her cheek, and headed into the kitchen to straighten up from dinner. His cell phone danced across the granite countertop as the text icon popped up on the screen.
Like an athlete on a long distance run, he got a second wind when he swiped the screen of his phone and saw who the text was from.
Dimples: It was my mom, wasn’t it?
He had no idea what she was talking about, but he was smiling for the first time in three days, and for that, he was grateful.
Decker: Hello :)
Dimples: Oh, hi. So, was it what I said about my mom that scared you away? You can be honest.
Decker: LOL, do you mean about the orgasm thing?
Dimples: I knew it!! Shit
Dimples: I mean, sorry…
She had him standing over the counter, reading her short notes and chuckling like a teenager with his first crush. He looked over his shoulder to make sure his laughter hadn’t disturbed his daughter. While he loved his little girl to pieces, he was craving adult time, and April was the perfect prescription.
Decker: Wait, why do you think I’m scared?
Dimples: Umm, you never miss 3 days at the gym
Decker: You noticed, huh ;)
Dimples: Ahh, so you’re one of those…
Decker: One of what?
His brows furrowed, but his lips quirked once again. The woman had him confused and delighted all at once.
Dimples: A gratuitous winker.
Decker: Hahaha, I think it’s just you, April, you make me… winky ;).
Decker laughed as he pressed send. He wasn’t sure what had him more fascinated: April’s immediate responses or her witty replies. Either way, he felt happy in way he hadn’t known in a long damn time.
Dimples: Anyway, you haven’t been there… I noticed. The only thing that changed was me… so I assumed I scared you off
Decker: Wanna know what I noticed?
Dimples: ?
Decker: You called me first ;)
A minute passed then another, and there was no response. Decker stared at his screen, hoping he hadn’t scared her that time. Just as he was about to tap out another text, his phone buzzed in his hands.
Dimples: No, Decker, I TEXTED you. I’ve spent my life looking for loopholes to my mother’s rules, and I figured out that texting was the technicality to the phone call clause. There were no texts when I was younger, therefore, I figure texts are safe for the Os :)
Decker stared at her words. His cheeks ached from the smile that was plastered across his face. April Maddox was different from any woman he’d ever met before, and he needed to know more. He needed to know all.
That said, there were things he had to share with her as well, the sooner the better. Over the years, he’d learned the hard way that plenty of women out there didn’t want anything to do with a man who had a child. Not that he’d been looking for a relationship—hell, he hadn’t been. Charlie was his baby, his heart, and his first priority. Much to his surprise and disgust, after dating one particular woman a few times before mentioning his daughter, he got the surprise of his life when she threw a toddler-sized tantrum during her explanation of how she hated children and refused to go anywhere near them. Laughing at the irony of her very public display of displeasure, Decker laid money on the table where they were dining and ended their date. From that point on, his parental status was disclosed up front, then he watched as the ladies either ran or swooned. Either way, he wasn’t interested in a relationship, so their reactions didn’t matter—but April’s did.
Sucking in a deep breath, Decker touched the green button at the bottom of the screen instead of tapping out another text. He placed the phone to his ear and listened intently to the dull ring.
“Hello?”
Just one word from April’s hu
sky voice soothed his nerves and hardened his dick. The question in her tone had Decker grinning once again. She obviously knew who was calling. After all, she had contacted him first. Yet for some reason, she sounded surprised. Then again, there was a part of him that hadn’t expected this call either, so he supposed the surprise was valid.
“Hello. May I please speak to April?”
“Umm…” There was a quick pause. “Decker, is this you?”
He could hear confusion in her voice, which eased his nerves and caused a chuckle to escape from his chest.
“Yeah, April, it’s me,” he answered casually. “I wanted to show you that we all have parents who drilled rules into us when we were kids. For my brother, Ford, and me, it was phone etiquette. Our mother went berserk when we answered the phone like ‘fools,’ her words, not mine.”
Her warm giggle covered him like a blanket fresh from the dryer. “Decker, phone etiquette is a normal thing for a parent to teach their children. Orgasm desertion is not. But thank you, thank you once again for reminding me that I told you that tidbit of information the first time we actually spoke.”
He could tell by her light tone that while she may have been embarrassed, she was in no way upset with him for poking fun. A beautiful woman who could laugh at herself was a heady combination.
Padding from the kitchen to the living room, Decker sunk into the plush leather sofa and placed his bare feet on the coffee table—thank God his mother was more concerned with teaching them about respecting people and less about furniture, because he was a feet-on-the-coffee-table kind of man. Finally comfortable, Decker decided it was time to come clean. “You may find this crazy, but in a way, it was you telling me about the whole no-phone-calling thing that really sealed the deal for me.”
“What?” Her inquisitive voice held humor.
“I’m not kidding, April. I told you from the start that I thought you were beautiful, but when you shared that information, be it intentional or not, it brought you to a whole different level.” He ran his fingers through his still-damp hair. “I knew then that I’d call.”
“But… you didn’t,” she whispered.
Decker rested his head on the back of the couch. His eyelids lowered as he swallowed the lump in his throat. If she doesn’t want Charlie, then why would you want her? The truth was he wouldn’t want her even for a minute longer, but in that moment, they still had a chance, and in that moment, ignorance was bliss.
“You’re right, I didn’t call.” He sighed loudly. “When I got home from the gym the other night, my mom was at my place, picking head lice out of my daughter’s hair.” The silence that filled his ear was so deafening that he checked to see if the connection had been severed. “April?”
“You have a child?”
Hearing the detached way she asked the question sent a chill up his spine. “Yes, I have a little girl,” he confirmed softly. More dead air filled space and time before he heard what sounded like a humorless snort.
“Figures.” Her snapped reply may have been short, but in that one word, all traces of the soft tenderness he’d adored were gone, replaced with a cold, hard front. “That’s what I get for answering questions about my relationship status instead of asking them.”
Decker shivered as he felt her iciness seep into his veins. How could someone who seemed so gentle be so callous? Even worse, how could he have misjudged her so completely? For over a month, he’d watched her, taken notice of the way she handled herself at the gym. While she didn’t talk to people her own age, she offered kind smiles and soft words to the elderly men and women who approached her. She even went as far as to admit her interest in him.
“Wow, okay.” He tried to keep the disappointment from his voice, but hiding the anger proved to be too damned difficult. “I didn’t realize that men who had children were such a travesty, April—”
“Are you kidding me?” she interrupted, her laughter sounded forced and laced with pain. “I don’t have a problem with kids! I have a problem with men who sneak around with women other than their wives. I have a problem with married men acting like they’re single while their spouses are busy loving them exclusively with nothing less than their whole heart. That’s where my problem lies.”
Each of her words was an iron brander, and blue fire blistered his skin and seared his soul. They had him knifing up on the sofa and slamming his feet firmly on the hardwood floor. She thought he was an adulterer, a lying bastard. That alone would have sliced him in half had her agony not been evident in the shallow breaths he heard coming through the line. Were those quiet sounds sobs? She was divorced. Had her husband cheated? Left her for someone else? His anger defused faster than air leaving an unknotted balloon. “Oh my God, April, I’m not married. I would never, ever do that to any woman, especially not one that I pledged to honor.”
Silence once again screamed through the phone until he heard another shuddered breath.
“April, hear me out, okay?”
“Go on,” she whispered.
“My wife, my daughter Charlie’s mom, died more than five years ago.” When he heard April’s gasp, he knew the whole truth needed to come out before any more assumptions were made. “I would have never cheated on her, April, but I can also tell you that she and I wouldn’t have stayed married. I’m sorry that she’s gone, because no one should lose their life that young, and now Charlie doesn’t have her mother, which breaks my heart. Does that make sense to you?”
*
SENSE? MY GOD, the last thing any of this made was sense. April’s mind was a Tilt-A-Whirl, and her stomach was feeling the effects. Of course it was possible for the man to have a child and not be married—Jesus, hello, pot, meet kettle. She wanted to kick herself for being such a closed-minded little brat. Not every man was a low-life scum. Not every man was Ben. When he finished his explanation with the fact that his wife was deceased, April wanted to search for the nearest volcano and plunge headfirst into the darkened pit.
“Decker.” She sighed as she held the phone between her shoulder and ear and hugged herself tight. “I am so unbelievably sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize, April.” While his words rang true, his tone sounded defeated and exhausted.
She felt like such an asshole, treating a perfectly nice man like shit based solely on the mistakes of her ex. But Ben’s betrayal cut deep, and even though years had passed, her wounds still ached. Sometimes they still bled.
Sitting back on the king-sized mattress, April pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her fluffy golden throw blanket over her chilled body. Decker had opened up to her. Now it was time to do a little sharing of her own.
“I do need to apologize, Decker. In fact, I owe you huge.” He tried to interrupt again, but April hushed him. “It’s my turn to talk, big guy, so simmer down.” His deep chuckle made what felt like a tight fist around her lungs loosen just a bit, at least enough to allow some oxygen to flow and words to release. “So… I also have a child, a little boy named Elijah. And he is everything to me.”
Unlike the ridiculous fish-out-of-water gasping shit that she pulled a few minutes prior when learning about Decker’s daughter, Decker’s response was appropriate. He asked Eli’s age and if he had green eyes like his mother. His overall sense of interest seemed genuine, which both comforted and scared the hell out of her.
April circled her hand over her stomach in an attempt to calm the nausea that rolled around the coiled pit as a slight coating of sweat dotted the smooth skin between her breasts. It wasn’t that she was ashamed of Eli. Hell, she thought her little boy was a superhero. It was just that she had a thing about not allowing people to get too close to her baby unless she knew they were going to stick around. She didn’t want her son to feel the sense of loss and rejection that had nearly broken her when Ben left and never looked back. Life was hard enough. Elijah didn’t need people coming and going. It was her job to protect him… and she did.
In fact, since her divorce, April hadn
’t dated. At all. So the conversation was like opening a safe that had been sealed shut for years. If she wasn’t so busy listening to the blood rush through her ears, she probably could have heard the squeak of unused vault hinges. While she had absolutely no immediate plans for Eli to meet Decker, the thought of discussing her son with a man she’d just met, a man she was insanely attracted to, a man she’d thought about while pleasuring herself made her uneasy. However, with said man waiting patiently on the other end of the line, she felt the indescribable need to explain her behavior. So she did.
While she didn’t bore him with the play-by-play, she gave him the highlights or, as she referred to them, the lowlights. After four years of reflection, April was finally able to see some of the signs she’d missed along the way, and she shared those with Decker as well. Each time she felt as if she was divulging too much or going on too long, Decker would ask another question or express his disapproval over Ben’s actions. April appreciated not just the fact that Decker listened, but the fact that he actively listened.
“I don’t understand, April.” Decker sounded perplexed.
“I threw a lot at you. What’s got you stumped?”
“How the hell could any man lucky enough to have you be dumb enough to let you go?”
The heavy feeling that had sat like a brick in her belly mere moments before magically turned to fairy dust, all shimmery fine and satiny smooth. How did he do that? Still wrapped in the blanket and holed up in the corner of her bed, drained from sharing what was arguably the worst experience of her life, she was amazed to feel the small smile stretching over her lips. No, there would never be a day when what Ben did would be anything less than disgusting, wrong, and horrendous, but just the actuality that she wasn’t crying buckets, hell, the reality was she was grinning? Decker Brand had to be some kind of magician.
His deep voice pulled her from her thoughts. “Seriously, April, no offense, but your ex sounds like a loser. As for the chick, she’s his current wife, right? How the fuck could she be with a man who was not only married but expecting a child? Ech, that’s a soulless woman right there.”