The following day, however, as I dressed for the airport, I started to have second thoughts. Traveling down to see Will to declare my love was so far out of my comfort zone; I didn’t know if I was prepared for the possibility he might not feel the same.
Insecurity was a tricky bitch. The moment you thought you’d put her firmly in a box and stopped giving her the power, she’d figure out a way to undermine your confidence.
That’s why my mind started working overtime. Maybe Will had been letting me down easy while in the meantime secretly looking forward to living it up single in LA. Perhaps he was glad to be rid of the boring ball and chain back in New York and had absolutely no intention of ever coming back.
I wheeled my suitcase downstairs and let Sherman put it in the back. I then sat in the back seat, completely undecided.
His eyes met mine in the rearview mirror, and he asked where to.
Shit. I should’ve brought my magic eight ball.
“Um, maybe I should just go into the office, Sherman. Thanks.”
His gaze didn’t leave mine. “I think you’d be better off going to the airport or train station or wherever you intended when you packed that suitcase, Ms. Davenport.”
I was stunned. Never in the six years he’d been driving me had he shared an unsolicited opinion. “Why’s that?”
“Because life is short, and sometimes you have to take chances.”
Even now, he was a man of few words. Yet the ones he said held maximum impact. “I’m curious. Would you have given me the same advice while I was married?”
Wisdom in spades was reflected in his eyes while his one simple word spoke volumes. “Nope.”
“To LaGuardia, please.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he returned with a smile.
***
Thankfully, an email to Will’s agent telling her I happened to be in Miami and would like to speak with her client was answered by the time I landed and she was helpful enough to let me know his hotel. Sometimes it paid to be the editor of Cosmo Life and pull some strings.
Will had indicated he’d have evenings off, which gave me enough time once I arrived at the hotel to get checked into my room and showered. But then what?
Going forward with half-baked plans hadn’t exactly paid dividends for me previously if my debacle of showing up unannounced at Club Travesty to rent a room was any indicator. This meant a text message letting Will know my room number was out of the question.
Been there, not doing that again, thank you very much.
So I did what any other perfectly sane woman, trying not to look stalkerish while, in fact, stalking the man she loved, would do. I waited in the lobby bar of the Fontainebleau hotel for him to come in, drinking a glass of wine as though I was supposed to be there. Yep, that was the extent of my grand plan.
Which would’ve been fine had he actually been alone when he arrived. But instead he climbed out of a van with the entire crew from the shoot and also two gorgeous female models.
My heart beat into overdrive, and self-doubt threatened to take hold. I contemplated leaving, but not before his blue eyes seemed to laser in on me and he stopped mid-conversation, looking shocked to see me.
Tempted to wave, instead I made myself sit there, watching as he hesitated and then proceeded to the far side of the hotel as if he hadn’t seen me there at all.
I think I sat stunned for a full three minutes before I could feel my heart start to beat again and air fill my lungs. The jolt from having him ignore me was so acute that it took me another moment before I could function. I put down a twenty, more than covering the glass of chardonnay I’d been sipping, and stood up on shaky legs, determined not to lose it in the middle of the hotel lobby.
Putting myself in motion, I strode toward the towers in the opposite direction of Will and company, cursing my choice of the four-inch Jimmy Choo heels and long, fitted navy skirt that didn’t allow me to move any faster than the small steps allowed by the slit.
I’d stayed at this hotel once before, and it was absolutely stunning with its modern architecture and a happening dance club, which was already starting to draw a crowd. But I didn’t notice any of that now. Instead, I focused on one thing.
The sanctuary of my room.
Although I could faintly hear my name getting louder coming from behind me, I didn’t register it was Will speaking until he stepped in front of me just as I found my elevator. I reached around him to hit the up button, not making eye contact, thankful when the car lit up and the doors to my right opened immediately.
“Cath, wait. It’s not what you think.”
Thankfully, it was only the two of us in the small space as I hit the twenty-ninth floor and the doors closed. I turned towards him, meeting his eyes. “So it wasn’t you completely ignoring me in the lobby.”
“I did that for your own good.”
“My own good?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.
The doors dinged open and I walked out with him hot on my heels. “Yes. I was with seven people from the shoot, half of whom probably know who you are. If I’d gone over to see you, they would’ve wondered what was going on.”
I put my key card in the door’s slot and walked in, already taking off my shoes with the intention of packing them up and getting the hell out of here. “So, what? Why would I care if they saw you with me?”
“The last thing you need is for people to know—”
I held up a hand, something dawning on me for the first time. “No, you did it for you. Because you’re the one embarrassed to be seen with me.”
His eyes went wide. “Why the fuck would I ever be embarrassed by you?”
Sighing deeply, I realized from his stunned expression that he didn’t have a clue about his own internal reservations. “Because you don’t want people to think you’re with me for the money or because of my connections.”
“What?”
“You say it’s about protecting me, which I believe you think is important, but it’s also about your pride. That pride won’t allow anyone to think for a second that you’re getting help from someone. So not only will you not take it, but you also don’t want even the perception that someone is giving you a hand up.”
He stood there staring at me, absorbing my words. “I—” He scrubbed a hand over his face. “I never consciously thought about that.” He stopped and sighed. “But I guess when it comes to you, I’m sensitive to it.”
“But why?”
He stepped closer, cupping my face. “Because one of the very first things you did was give me money.”
I closed my eyes, annoyed with myself that I hadn’t seen that sooner. I’d hit his trigger from the beginning by paying his medical expenses. Now he didn’t trust me not to go behind his back and do it again. It explained why he’d jumped to the conclusion that I’d given the recommendation to Claus and his general distrust. “If I’d had any clue we would’ve become involved, I would’ve thought twice before doing it.”
He kissed me softly. “Your generosity is what makes you, well, you. And I’m sorry. I could never be embarrassed to be seen with you.”
“It’s ironic because if the donation for your surgery had stayed anonymous as planned, we might never have gotten together.”
His lips curved into a smile. “I would’ve never brought you to Australia to work it off or found out you have a killer mud ball aim.”
I laughed, needing the humor in the conversation to remind me of our connection. “God, the expression on your pretty-boy face that night was so worth it.”
We both smiled at the memory before he asked, “I thought you couldn’t come down here because of your big meetings this week?”
“I rescheduled today, but need to be back by tomorrow morning.”
“Why would you do that?”
Putting all the doubts to the side, I went for it. “Because I’ve been thinking about this California thing if you get the contract with Claus. I’d be up for traveling out there. Maybe not every w
eekend, but every other one. Or if you’re modelling in other places, we could try to meet wherever they are.”
The hope on his face quelled any doubts I might have had that he’d been using this as an excuse to end what we had.
“You’d be open to doing the long-distance thing?”
“Yes. Absolutely.”
His face looked full of optimism before he sighed regretfully. “Cath, I can’t let you do that. I mean, you have a whole life in New York and would get tired of the travel, not to mention the expense. It just wouldn’t make sense.”
My heart was in my throat, but I didn’t travel twelve hundred miles with the intention of not putting it all on the table. “I came down here because, for once in my life, I’m not taking the safe route and sitting at home keeping my feelings to myself. I want to be all in with you, Will. No safety net. No regrets. Even if that means getting my heart broken for the effort.”
He stood there staring for the longest moment. “Are you saying what I think you are?”
“You’re the mind reader, so I’m surprised you didn’t already know.”
His hands framed my face. “Say it,” he demanded softly.
“I’m in love with you.”
“Really?” He looked as though he couldn’t believe it.
“Yes, really. And although I know this isn’t exactly ‘playing it by ear’—”
He cut me off with a kiss. “You should’ve stopped at your first word because I love you, too.”
I felt the adrenaline flow through my veins with his declaration and launched myself at him. Unfortunately my skirt wasn’t allowing much movement, but Will took care of that by unzipping it. Freed, I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his waist. Mouths clashing, he walked us over to the bed.
“Jesus, Cath—” he appeared half amused and half in shock once he’d deposited me on the bed and followed me down.
“Is that a ‘Jesus, Cath stop,’ or a ‘Jesus, Cath, don’t stop’?” I wasted no time in going for his buckle.
“Don’t you even think about stopping.”
So we didn’t for two whole hours.
***
“I’m starving,” I whispered, watching the light disappear with the setting sun in the hotel window.
“Room service okay?” He stroked my back as if he couldn’t touch me enough.
“Perfect. What would you like?”
“Meat of any kind and veggies would be good. And make sure I’m paying. You can charge it to my room.”
I slipped out of bed and grabbed the robe from the closet. “No.”
He sat up, quirking a brow. “What?”
After tying my sash, I reached for the menu and dialed the phone. “You heard me. I said no. I’m paying for dinner.”
He looked like he wanted to argue, but I was busy speaking into the phone to order two steaks with veggies and wine.
After I hung up, he crossed over, still completely naked, and pulled me to him. “What was that about?”
“I paid your hospital bill back before this getting naked business—” I motioned between us. “—for which you’re paying me back with Colby’s charity event in January. But once that's done, I refuse to walk on eggshells or keep apologizing for it. You’re going to have to learn to trust I won’t overstep those boundaries again. And when I travel out to LA, the last thing I want to do is fight about money.”
“If you’re paying to fly out there and probably for a hotel room, then I’m paying for dinner while you’re there.”
“Okay, that’s fair.”
He laughed. “So you really want to go for it?”
“Are you changing your mind now?”
His grin confirmed his answer before his words. “Never, although I feel selfish in saying it. Of course, I still need to hear back, but my agent said it was looking good, so I’m hopeful I’ll get confirmation soon.”
“What’s selfish about it? I want to be with you, and if you feel the same way…”
He caressed my face, keeping his gaze locked on mine. “I hate that you have any doubts about it. That means I haven’t done a very good job of convincing you how much you mean to me.”
A relieved smile spread across my face. “You just did, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a small reservation that you might desire a new life out in LA.”
He shook his head, dropping a kiss on my lips. “Not even a little bit.”
***
Back from Miami and walking into the office a little after ten o’clock on Wednesday morning, I couldn't keep the smile off my face. I was under no illusion that maintaining a long-distance relationship would be easy. Quite the contrary. But the fact that I’d rather put in the work and effort with Will than have it easy and convenient with anyone else told me all I needed to know.
Plus, I was proud of myself for putting it all on the line. I’d come away feeling confident that without risk, there’s no reward. Of course, the fact that I was already missing him presented a challenge if we were to spend weeks at a time apart. But we’d cross that bridge when we came to it.
Funny how I’d once used work to distract myself from a crumbling marriage, then from the sting of divorce, and then to make myself feel fulfilled in life. But right now at my desk with twelve things I needed to do, I was instead distracted by a replay of this morning and how sweet Will had been while kissing me goodbye.
Unfortunately, these meetings weren’t going to run themselves, so for now I’d need to move on with reality.
By Friday evening, I was about done with the real world, where I’d been obliged to pack all of my missed meetings into three days. But more than that, I was excited about seeing Will tonight. It wasn’t lost on me that missing him would be the norm once he moved to LA. Nevertheless, when his name illuminated on my cell phone and I smiled more than I had all week, I knew staying together would be worth it.
“Hiya Gorgeous.”
I’d never get tired of that greeting. “Hi, yourself. Did you just land?”
“Yeah. Long day. How about you? You still in the office?”
“About to leave. You want to come over?”
“Uh, yeah. It might be a bit, though, as I have some errands to run.”
“Everything all right?” There was something in his tone that sounded off.
“We can talk about it once I get to your place in a couple hours if that’s okay.”
“Sure.” I tried not to feel anxious about his words. Maybe he’d just had a bad shoot in Miami, or something was going on with his family. But even as I tried to convince myself not to worry this would affect us, my gut already knew it would.
***
Two hours later I opened the door to Will after hearing his knock. I’d barely shut it before he was on me.
Lips met mine while his hand wasted no time cupping my sex. “God, I fucking missed you. Only two days away, but it feels like weeks.”
“I missed you, too,” I gasped, feeling his hand slide in past the waistband of my yoga pants. Two fingers shoved inside of me and found me already wet for him.
“I’m a selfish bastard, but I need you too much right now to stop.”
That sounded strange for him to say, but I didn’t question it considering this felt too damn good to ruin the moment.
Wasting no time, he backed me up into the couch and pushed my pants down past my hips. He didn’t bother to shed any more clothing before kneeling in front of me and devouring me completely. His tongue ran the length of my slit before focusing in on my nub. He took my over-sensitive clit between his lips and sucked while his fingers continued the havoc they were wreaking by curling up inside of me to the perfect spot.
“Will…” I let out on a hoarse moan and allowed the climax to annihilate me. My legs no longer supported my weight, but he was attuned to my inability to stand, thankfully, and supported my body while lifting me up to sit on the back of the couch.
As his lips met mine, he unzipped his pants and thrust inside of me fully on one stro
ke, the slight burn causing us both to gasp. This carnal, almost frenzied coupling was so different from his usual slow workup, yet it was no less of a turn-on.
Wrapping my legs around his hips, I pulled him deeper, fueled by the taste of me on his lips and the wild pace he’d started to set. His hand pulled on my hair, forcing my head back and exposing my neck to his lips and teeth. He nipped his way down, rougher than normal and practically inviting my nails on his skin. I raked them over his ass, and his grunt of pleasure only spurred me on further.
This time when my orgasm bore down on me, I took him over the edge with me, my intimate muscles gripping him to the point where he had no choice but to grind out his climax deep inside of me.
We lay there on the sofa afterward, catching our breath and tangled together. He spoke quietly. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
Propping up on his chest, I met his eyes. “Not at all.”
He sighed in relief. “I didn’t mean to make it so rough.”
I couldn’t help smiling. “I’m not complaining. In fact, I really liked it.”
At least that pulled a grin from him. He stood up, took my hand, and proceeded to lead me into the bedroom where he removed the remainder of my clothing methodically, in between kisses. He made love to me slowly then, almost as though he was trying to show me the complete opposite of our earlier frenzy.
***
Later, I watched as Will got up out of the bed and went into my bathroom. Feeling his weight back on the bed, but not his warmth, I opened my eyes again to see him sitting on the edge of the bed, his head in hands. “What’s wrong?”
He turned, his blue eyes meeting mine with something I’d never seen reflected in them. Defeat.
“I didn’t get the modelling contract with Claus.”
I expelled a breath, knowing the timing of this news had to be devastating for him, coupled as it was with quitting his job at Club T. “I’m sorry.”
“It was presumptuous for me to think I would.”
In the back of my mind, I thought it might’ve had some impact if I’d been able to give him a recommendation, but considering it was a moot point, I kept quiet on the subject. “We can figure something else out.”
Teach Me Something (Something Series Book 4) Page 24