Pineapple Puzzles: A Pineapple Port Mystery: Book Three (Pineapple Port Mysteries 3)

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Pineapple Puzzles: A Pineapple Port Mystery: Book Three (Pineapple Port Mysteries 3) Page 12

by Amy Vansant


  Simone scowled. “What? I don’t understand you.”

  “Sorry, that was confusing. My nephew’s ex-girlfriend’s name is Stephanie. She’s a bit of a nutter, so we aren’t always inclined to believe her. But she seems genuinely worried for her safety.”

  “Did you say her mother is trying to kill her?

  Seamus nodded. “That’s not even the craziest part.”

  “Oh, I can’t wait to hear what that is.”

  “Her mother is the Puzzle Killer.”

  Simone gasped. “You’re kidding!”

  “That’s what she says. She says the guy who did the other killings only did them to get the attention of the Puzzle Killer. When he finally contacted her, he told her she had to kill her own daughter or he’d turn her into the police.”

  “That’s horrible.”

  “Aye.”

  “And you believe this Stephanie?”

  “I think so. This seems too crazy for her to make up.”

  “Why doesn’t she turn her in?”

  “I don’t think she has any actual proof. Plus, she’s a lawyer. The woman is her client now.”

  “How does she know all this? Did her mother threaten her?”

  “She didn’t say how she knew—said she had sources—but now she’s hiding from her own mother.”

  Simone tossed her head, eyes rolling. “This is insane!”

  “Yup.”

  “Is she safe for now? Is she with your nephew?”

  “No, they thought this killer fella might know Declan was her ex, so she’s staying with Dec’s new girlfriend.”

  Simone chuckled. “That sounds uncomfortable.”

  “You have no idea. So, does this ring any bells for you? Have I given you something you can use?”

  She shook her head. “No. None of my WitSec people have ever mentioned any interest in the Puzzle Killer. My people tend to kill for profit, not fun.”

  “I guess that’s good.”

  “Not really. If I saw a connection I’d have a path to explore.”

  “True.”

  “Is there any chance this person will make the connection between your nephew and his new girlfriend?”

  “I guess it’s possible.” Seamus pondered this. “I didn’t think so, but now that you mention it this guy seems to know a lot of things he shouldn’t.”

  “That’s what I’m thinking. Maybe you should bring her here.”

  “Stephanie? You’d take her in?”

  Simone shrugged. “Yes, if it would help. Though none of this sounds like it’s the handiwork of one of my charges, I still feel a tiny bit responsible for anything criminal that happens in Charity.”

  “I’ll let Charlotte know.”

  “Charlotte?”

  “My nephew’s current girlfriend.”

  “Ah.” Simone stood and strolled toward Seamus. She placed a palm on his chest and he froze, like a mongoose held in the gaze of a cobra.

  She leaned in and kissed him.

  He didn’t stop her.

  She pulled back slowly, his lower lip held gently in her teeth. She released and his lip snapped back into place.

  “Good luck with everything. Let me know if you need me,” she purred.

  He pursed his lips and nodded stiffly.

  Simone went back inside and Seamus looked up in time to spot a face staring at him from a parked car.

  A very familiar parked car.

  Charlotte’s parked car.

  He hung his head.

  “Bugger.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Charlotte had left to run an errand and Stephanie found herself alone in Bland-ville, hoping the Golden Girls didn’t swing by for tea.

  She rubbed her face. This is a nightmare. The whole point of hiding was to stay with Declan where he’d be unable to resist her charms for long. Instead, she was living with his girlfriend, her dog, the most revolting cat she’d ever seen and a revolving cast of geriatrics.

  She wandered into the living room and pulled her phone from her pocket before sitting. She stared at it for a few minutes and then dialed.

  “Hello?”

  “Hi.”

  There was a pause before Jamie’s voice perked a notch. “Hey! Hi, dear. I was just going to call you—”

  Stephanie swallowed. “Call? Or kill?”

  “I’m sorry, what?”

  “Is today the day you’re going to kill me? I just need to know for my calendar.”

  There was another silence before Jamie answered in a much more serious tone. “You monitored my interaction with Alex?”

  “I did.”

  “How?”

  “How? You think I can give you a super secure computer for your homicidal maniac Match.com and I can’t trace what happens?”

  “I am never going to understand computers,” said Jamie, sounding exhausted. “It all sounds like magic to me.”

  “Not nearly as magical as watching your mother agree to kill you.”

  Jamie scoffed. “Oh stop. I don’t have any intention of killing you. I’m just delaying him while I figure out my next move.”

  “Can I ask you why you were in Declan’s girlfriend’s house?”

  “What?”

  “She found an earring. A sapphire surrounded by pearls. Sound familiar?”

  “Oh! You found my earring! Hallelujah. I spent three hours searching for that thing. That is a load off my mind. It must have been that stupid cat—”

  “Why were you in Charlotte’s house?”

  “You know, basic surveillance. Wanted to get a handle on her, just in case—”

  “In case what?”

  “Well, for one, what if I killed you in a fire for Alex, but the body was actually Charlotte’s? Huh? Ever think of that?”

  “Mom, it isn’t nineteen seventy. They’ll be able to tell the body isn’t mine in about two seconds. Seriously, don’t you ever watch Dateline?”

  “I’ve actually been on Dateline. Sort of. Look, why don’t you swing by and we’ll talk? We’ll figure out something—”

  “Said the spider to the fly. No thanks. I’m staying as far away from you as I can.”

  “Come on, honey! We just got reconnected. You can’t—”

  Stephanie hung up and let her gaze drift around Charlotte’s sad little living room. It looked like Declan’s pawnshop threw up in it.

  She heard a low, soft growl and noticed the cat had left its usual perch on the refrigerator and made its way to the chair beside her. It stared at her and she could see muscles flexing beneath its naked skin, as if it were planning to jump.

  She scowled at it.

  “Don’t even think about it.”

  The cat hissed and slinked from the chair before scurrying back to the refrigerator.

  Someone knocked on the front door and Stephanie stood. Abby flew down the hallway, barking. Stephanie spotted an old man with large teeth peering at her through the window. Great. Another old person. It was like Charlotte handed out free heart medication or something.

  Using her leg to push back the dog, she opened the door.

  “Yes?”

  “Hi. It’s me, Lester. I need to talk to you.”

  Stephanie raised an eyebrow. “You do?”

  “It’s about my arrest. I need you to get a message to Carolina.”

  “Your arrest? This is getting interesting.”

  “I need you to let her know it wasn’t anything important. I mean, it turned out to be, in a way, but not really. Can you tell her it wasn’t anything important?”

  Stephanie smiled. The old dude thinks I’m Charlotte. This could be a chance to have some fun.

  “Well, this all depends, Lester. Why were you arrested?”

  He sighed and hung his head. “An alligator.”

  “An alligator?”

  “It ate someone.”

  Stephanie straightened. “Who?”

  “Some guy. In a pool.”

  “The guy in the paper? The puzzle maker?”
/>   He nodded.

  “What do you have to do with it?”

  “I was supposed to be watching the alligator. His name was Oscar. I took a part-time job at Gary’s Gator House and I guess I left the cage open.”

  His eyes shifted and Stephanie’s sixth sense told her he was lying. “The Gator House is thirty miles from here, isn’t it? You’re telling me that alligator walked thirty miles to slide into some guy’s pool? On those stubby little legs?”

  “Gators can run twenty miles per hour,” said Lester.

  “I’ll remember that next time I’m near one of your cages.”

  Lester scratched his cheek. “It sounds crazy, I don’t understand it either, but Oscar was tagged so they know it was him. He’s one of the oldest at the park. Or, he was. They killed him after the...the mishap.”

  “And you left his cage door open?”

  “I guess. Well, sort of.” He shuffled and thrust his hands in his pockets. “Can I be honest?”

  “By all means.”

  “I told the cops when I got home after work I found the padlock in my pocket. By the time I drove back, Oscar was missing.”

  “But that’s not what happened?”

  “No. Some guy paid me a thousand bucks to turn my back on the cage for a few minutes.”

  “And he stole the alligator?”

  Lester shrugged. “I guess. I left and never went back. That’s why they came looking for me at the bowling alley. They thought I stole Oscar.”

  “Arrested at the bowling alley,” mumbled Stephanie. “Oh, the glamor of it all.”

  “Not exactly the bowling alley,” said Lester, staring off into the distance. “They spotted me in Declan’s car.”

  Stephanie’s eyes grew wide. “Declan? How is he involved in this?”

  “He’s on our bowling team.”

  Stephanie blanched. “Ew. She’s really got him domesticated now, doesn’t she?”

  “Who?”

  “Charlotte.”

  “Charlotte? But you’re...” He leaned forward and peered into her face. “Wait, didn’t you used to have dark hair?”

  “Not since I was seventeen.”

  “You’re not Charlotte?”

  “No. And frankly I’m horrified you thought I was.”

  “Oh, oh jeeze. Look, don’t tell Carolina anything, okay?”

  Stephanie crossed her arms over her chest. “Lester, let me ask you something.”

  “Sure.”

  “Did you know the guy who stole the alligator? Could you describe him?”

  “Sure, he was a big guy, lots of tats. He had one with a mermaid, but it had the face of an angel, with a halo, you know? I thought that was different.”

  “But you didn’t tell the cops that?”

  “No. Not yet anyway. I’m hoping this is the end of it, but worst case scenario I can give up the guy and make a deal.”

  Stephanie nodded. “Smart. I’m a criminal defense lawyer, you know.”

  Lester’s eyes grew wide. “You are?”

  “Yep. I’m sort of on, vacation, but why don’t we swing to my office and I can give you some counseling that could save you a lot of jail time?”

  Lester slapped his hands together. “Oh, that would be wonderful! But… Can’t we just do it here?”

  “I don’t want to run the risk of Charlotte or—worse—Carolina showing up, do you?”

  “No. No, that wouldn’t be good.” Lester grinned. “Let’s go!

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  “Hello there,” said Seamus, strolling to Charlotte’s car. “What brings you to Silver Lake? Aren’t you permanently banned from there after staging the great dog poop revolt?”

  “Very funny. How’s your lip?”

  “Ah, you saw that, did you?”

  Charlotte nodded.

  “It isn’t what it looks like. She’s mental.” Seamus pointed his finger to his head and made circles to emphasize his point.

  “Let’s not drag this out. Are you cheating on Jackie?”

  “Cheating? First of all, we never said we were exclusive—”

  “Wait, let me stop you right there,” said Charlotte holding up her hand. “You mean you and Jackie didn’t have a document signed by a notary stating that you’re exclusively dating each other?”

  Seamus grinned. “See? You understand.”

  “No—I’m kidding—but there are certain assumptions people make. For one, I’m thinking Jackie assumes that you’re not kissing ladies on their porches.”

  “I didn’t kiss a lady on a porch. A lady kissed me.”

  Charlotte stared at him.

  “Seriously. I can’t tell you it isn’t beguiling that Simone gets a little handsy with me, but I’m not an idiot. I’m too old for that kind of trouble. And I’m not cheating on Jackie.”

  Charlotte smiled. “Good.”

  “So let me ask you this, Miss Uncomplicated, why are you here?”

  Charlotte knit her brow. “Well, now, that is complicated...”

  Seamus pointed at her. “You’re spying on me!”

  “Maybe. A little.”

  “Jackie thinks I’m cheating, doesn’t she? Did she ask you to tail me?”

  “No! Absolutely not. She just happened to share certain questions she had with me and I took it upon myself.”

  “Sounds pretty cloak and dagger to me. Pretty complicated.”

  Charlotte chuckled. “Now that this is all behind us, what did Simone say?”

  “Nice segue. Smooth.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Simone doesn’t think any of her people are the sort to try and trap the Puzzle Killer.”

  “Hm. That’s too bad. Would have made life easier.”

  “Yes, it would have. But as long as I have you here, she also said she’d be willing to watch Stephanie for us.”

  Charlotte perked. “Really?”

  “She thinks your house isn’t the safest place. It’s feasible Stephanie’s mother could follow the strings to you.”

  “That thought crossed my mind last night when I found Mariska and her sister at my house. It’s one thing to put myself in danger; it’s another to endanger everyone else.”

  “So we’re agreed? We’ll bring Stephanie to Simone?”

  She nodded. “Probably a good idea. There’s no way to trace Stephanie to Simone unless someone’s following me.”

  They both looked down the street behind Charlotte’s car.

  “I should probably get out of here.”

  He nodded.

  Charlotte drove home to find no one there. She was tempted to laze around the house and enjoy the emptiness of it but there was too much to do. She had to find Stephanie, who should have been there. And once that was accomplished, she had to let Jackie know her fears were unfounded. At least when it came to Simone.

  She walked outside and stood on the porch. Did Stephanie take a walk? She wasn’t sure where to look first. She pulled out her phone and on her recent call list, saw Declan’s name.

  Ah. That would be a good place to start.

  She was about to dial when a blur of brown whizzed over her sandaled toes and she yelped as what felt suspiciously like a dog’s toenail dug into the top of her foot.

  “Turbo!”

  Darla headed towards her, dressed in a flowing mumu and moving about as fast as Charlotte had ever seen her.

  “Grab that hot dog!” she screamed.

  Charlotte followed the blur and saw Darla’s new miniature dachshund looping around for another pass. When he neared, she squatted and scooped the squirming pipsqueak into her arms.

  “Cheese and crackers,” said Darla. “That dog is going to be the death of me.”

  Charlotte handed the panting bundle of energy over to Darla, who snuggled the puppy against her cheek.

  “You look furious,” said Charlotte, smirking.

  “Oh, he’s just so dang cute. What are you up to today?”

  “I’m looking for Stephanie.”

  “Is tha
t the blonde?”

  Charlotte nodded.

  Darla shook her head and made a disapproving tsk noise. “Mariska told me all about it. That girl is up to no good. Carolina called her a Jezebel.”

  “Carolina calls everyone a Jezebel, though I’m inclined to agree this time. Still, right now, I need to find Jezzy. She’s supposed to be here.”

  “She left with Lester.”

  Charlotte scowled. “What?”

  “Lester. The new guy. I saw them out here on the porch talking and then they toddled off together.”

  “On foot?”

  She nodded.

  Charlotte put her fingers over her lips as a thought occurred to her. “Oh no.”

  “What is it?”

  “Did you know Lester was arrested the other night?”

  Darla’s eyes grew wide. “No! Why?”

  “I don’t know.” Charlotte hopped into her ruby red golf cart. “Where is he again? The old section?”

  “I think so. I’m not sure what house though.”

  “Okay. Gotta go.”

  Charlotte pulled out of the driveway and mashed the pedal to the floor. Rounding the first turn, she spotted Jackie watering what was left of her garden in the distance.

  “He’s not cheating!” she screamed as she approached.

  Jackie turned to watch her whiz past. “No?”

  “No!”

  “Good!”

  Charlotte smiled. Check that off the to-do list. She loved multitasking.

  She racked her brain for everything she’d heard about Lester. She knew he was living in the old section but where...where...Tilladay’s house. That’s right. He was renting Mr. Tilladay’s house.

  She cocked her head. Where did Mr. Tilladay go anyway? Had she heard?

  Oh, I hope he isn’t walled up in the house or something.

  She pulled onto Alpinia Lane in the older section of Pineapple Port and into the driveway of Mr. Tilladay’s former house. There was no car in the carport. She hopped out and knocked on the door.

  Nothing.

  She peered through the window, but saw no movement. No one seemed to be there.

  Pulling out her phone she called Declan.

  “Have you seen Stephanie?” she asked when he answered.

 

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