by Bowes, K T
The gate buzzer sounded in the hall. “Noooooooo!” Logan wailed, “See what you wished on us!”
Hana stood up and looked out of the window, adjusting her underwear. Bodie’s car rumbled up the driveway and Jas’ little face peeked out of the side window, his eyes wide and excited. “Hanny!” he shrieked and they heard his little feet pounding up the front steps, “Hanny and Popppppaaaaa!”
Logan hefted his shirt over his head and pulled his zipper up with a smouldering look at Hana. She heard his footsteps on the hall floorboards and the sound of the front door opening.
“Hanny!” she heard Jas yell and trotted down to the front door, curiosity and a hint of fear burning in her breast. Jas shot in like a thunderbolt, kicking his flip-flops off in different directions in his excitement. Amy tried desperately to contain her son and Bodie set his face in disapproval as he strode up the front steps, but offered nothing by way of help.
“Hey, Jas!” Hana gave her grandson a beautiful smile. She couldn’t hear his reply through the hand Amy held firmly over his mouth. He kicked and spluttered and fought her, but Amy was resolute.
“Wait for Daddy!”
Bodie closed the front door with frightening precision and Amy waited, still covering her son’s mouth. Jas looked like he was ready to explode. “I’ve asked Amy to marry me,” Bodie said finally, his face brimming with pride, “and she’s agreed.”
Hana’s face lit up with pleasure. They looked perfect standing there altogether. A proper little family. She rushed forward to hug and congratulate them and Logan shook hands with Bo and gave Amy a hug. “Time for a celebration then,” he smiled. He went to the kitchen and there came the sound of a cork being popped.
“Oh, oh! Campaign. I’ll help!” Jas charged in and started making alarming noises involving the chink of glasses.
“Campaign!” Hana snorted out of his earshot. “What is he like?”
Eventually, everyone had a glass of something nice. Jas’ portion was about as big as the one Logan allowed Hana, much to her disgust and they toasted the future. “To the Johal family,” Logan said.
Hana’s face clouded almost imperceptibly and he noticed. She felt thrilled for her son but oddly distanced from the Johal name, as though cast out over a period of time without having realised it before. A sadness bit deep in her gut that was about more than just a change of name. It was a releasing, a letting go. Hana smiled and showed an interest and did all the things expected of her, but Logan saw the pain and wondered about it.
After Jas zonked out on the living room rug and went to sleep amidst jokes about not being able to hold his alcohol, the adults sat around the kitchen table and talked. They talked about Bodie’s proposal, which had apparently been momentous. “He took Jas out of kindy early and came down to the station,” Amy laughed. “Then he got on one knee in the charge room, in front of all our colleagues and a whole bunch of crims waiting to be processed. Jas carried a bunch of red roses and Bodie had a diamond ring in a box.”
“She was stuck for words.” Bodie looked shy. “News whipped round the station in no time and everyone offered their congratulations.”
“Yeah,” Amy interrupted. “Bodie and me were the best-kept secret in the place and Jas, an even better one.”
“I’m so happy for you,” Hana said. “It’s been a rocky road.” She sipped her drink and let her mind wander.
“I thought he’d gone off me.” Amy’s statement brought Hana back to the present. She was tired and shook her head to clear it.
Bodie looked embarrassed. “I was trying to right some wrongs.” He looked at his mother with meaning and she understood. He hadn’t been spending the night at Amy’s place as she wrongly assumed. But he hadn’t explained himself, just wrestled with it alone. No wonder Amy got confused. Hana smiled at her son, willing her face to show him approval. He looked back with gratitude.
The conversation moved to the subject of Laval and Hana felt her chest tense. She glanced at Logan’s wounds, slowly healing but marking him forever with the trace of violence. In Bodie’s version, Logan was a brave hero who put his body on the line to catch Laval. Logan seemed embarrassed. “Odering would have caught him eventually. It’s why he transferred down here apparently. He was tasked to shut the guy down about two years ago.”
Hana sensed something unsettled coming off her husband and wondered if it was discomfort at being lauded. Or something else.
“Did he tell you that?” Bodie looked put out. “Even I didn’t know that.”
“Yeah. He’s got a wife and kids in Auckland.” Logan ran a hand over his face and didn’t seem to want to continue the conversation.
Hana slapped his knee and kissed him gently, ruffling his hair and embarrassing him further. “My hero,” she simpered.
“Your husband was amazing,” Bodie told Hana, “that beating was intense...” he trailed off at the stern look from Logan.
“Laval’s on remand at Waitakere Prison,” Amy interjected. “His new guys were picked up at the same time and charges laid against them, including attempted murder for dumping Logan into the lake. Odering’s spending long nights at the office, clearing up the different parts of the case.”
“What about the missing widow?” Hana asked hopefully. “I prayed she wasn’t really dead, but being held by Laval somewhere until he got the box back.”
Logan shifted in his seat and Bodie looked uncomfortable. “Sorry, Mum. We found her at the lake. There’s a record of local residents complaining about an unpleasant smell emanating from around the lake. They reported it to the council but they were doing remedial work on an area of swamp and assumed it was that. They did a lot of dredging work in the summer and it stirred up all sorts of crap. Eventually over the winter, the smell lessened until everyone forgot about it. Odering got the council back in and they excavated a drain outlet buried in a raised bank. It wasn’t on the plans and caved in years ago. The manhole cover was masked by agapanthus that got out of control and she was so far in, they wouldn’t have found her with a cursory investigation. Much of her clothing had dispersed and washed into the lake...”
Hana swallowed and looked pale. Logan shook his head at Bodie to shut him up. Hana gulped. “How can they be sure it’s actually her if there’s...nothing left of her clothing or bag or anything? It might not be her. She might be hiding somewhere.”
Bodie looked nervously at Logan again. Hana sighed. “Just finish it, please. Otherwise, I’ll always wonder if she’s sunning herself in Fiji instead.”
“Ok, well, they pulled her out, mainly intact although the wildlife inhabitants of the lake made the most her being there. Dental records and DNA positively identified her.” One more look at Logan’s narrowed grey eyes silenced Bodie temporarily. Hana felt sad thinking of the life of an innocent, lonely woman, snuffed out for daring to find companionship. She kept her head down and chewed at a snagged nail on her ring finger.
“There were others too,” Bodie said, unable to help himself. “This was the most...lucrative.” Hana shuddered. “It’s weird though,” Bodie continued, failing to notice his mother’s discomfort and conveniently looking everywhere but at Logan. “Laval, seemed like a plausible old man when I saw him. White-haired, wrinkly, glasses, limp and a cane. It’s amazing how people aren’t what they seem, isn’t it?”
Everyone around the table except Logan, nodded thoughtfully. Hana stayed still and quiet. “Where does he live?” she asked into the silence. It was a strange question, but it was bothering her and she wasn’t sure why.
“One of the units at a residential estate, funnily enough,” Bodie said with a laugh. “He wasn’t even living it up with all he stole. Bizarre. No idea how he found guys to work for him, not from Alder Dale.”
Logan looked at Hana curiously as he rested his hand on her thigh under the table. He leaned forward and stared his stepson down. His voice was laden with warning. “Guess what everyone? Bodie’s gonna shut up now.”
Bodie’s eyes flashed with anger but h
e obeyed, if reluctantly.
“Yes, let’s talk about something else.” Amy joined the motion with a nervous look at Logan. Hana looked pale and sick, the healthy glow from her time in the south, quickly gone.
“It doesn’t work.” Hana spoke into the silence. She appealed to Logan with her eyes. “It doesn’t make sense. All those weeks of car-swapping with Angus - and Laval lived in the same complex all the time. I was either very fortunate or...”
Hana looked sideways at the cuts and bruises healing on Logan’s face. He never complained. She put her hand over his where it still rested on her thigh and when he looked at her, she bit her lip. He knew what she was thinking. It wasn’t over. His fingers caught hold of hers under the table and they shared that rare electrical connection, arcing between them.
“So tell me about my new nephews?” Bodie asked, changing the subject. Logan retrieved the shiny phone Marcus helped him choose and flicked through the photos. They all laughed at one of Elizabeth sitting on Marcus’ head eating an ice cream. Her little mouth was wide open in a laugh, white tongue poked out and her eyes shut tight as she enjoyed herself.
“Marcus had to have a shower after that,” sniggered Hana.
Bodie smiled and looked sadly at the photo of his friend. “I should see more of them,” he said wistfully. “The boys look cute, just like Izzie when she was little. Gosh!” he said, peering more closely at a photograph scrolling up, of the little baby boys side by side on the sofa. “That one’s got reddish hair! Mum! Somebody has your genes!”
Hana laughed and Amy slapped Bodie on the arm. She felt mildly pleased. She noticed that too. In certain lights, one of the boys had a strawberry hint amidst the mousey tufts. The other boy had black hair, although it was already wearing off the back of his head and being replaced by a lighter colour. Who knew how it would turn out? They had their whole lives ahead of them.
“Izzie texted me about the car,” Bodie said, looking pointedly at Logan. Logan bit his bottom lip and looked back at him with flashing grey eyes, saying nothing.
“They need to get rid of it,” Hana said, completely misunderstanding. “I’m sure as Marcus drove off it looked down on one side. It’s a bit of a heap. I didn’t drive it, but you did yesterday, didn’t you, Logan?”
Logan looked back at Hana and lifted his hand to brush a strand of hair from her eye. “Yeah, you look tired, babe.”
She blinked and rested her cheek on his palm as he left it there. “I am a bit.”
Amy prodded Bodie under the table and for once he shut up.
A quick rap on the front door and then the click of the key turning, revealed Maihi bustling up the steps. She wore a large anorak and carried a casserole dish. Hemi was right behind her, stamping his boots outside on the porch to shake the mud off. They came inside, bringing a draught with them. Logan got straight to his feet and greeted them both with a hongi, nose to nose as family.
“Kia ora koutou katoa.” Hemi’s deep voice rumbled a greeting to the occupants of the room. “How are you, tamaiti tāne?” He spoke to Logan in a low voice, holding him him for longer than usual and staring into the younger man’s eyes with incredible perception.
“I’m good,” Logan replied.
Hemi nodded, then clapped Logan on both shoulders with his giant bear-like paws and patted his cheek. “Tēnā, tēnā, that’s good.”
Maihi made a beeline for Hana and squashed her from behind, once she laid the dish down on the worktop. “How’s my girl?” she wanted to know hugging Hana tightly.
“Good thanks,” Hana smiled and kissed Maihi’s cheek from the side. “Thank you for looking after the house.”
Maihi stood up and waved her hand. “Oh, that’s fine. We stole your cat and had a party every night.” Hana laughed, not believing a word of it. “No, seriously,” Maihi interjected, “Tiger’s moved in with us. He don’t want to come back no more. He’s in love with Ginger.”
Hana’s mouth formed a little ‘o’ of surprise, but then she realised she hadn’t seen him since they got home. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it. She wondered if she could coax him back home again.
Maihi grabbed mugs for her and Hemi and poured them some tea. They gathered round the old, pock-marked table comfortably, all six of them. Hemi talked about his herd of Friesians in the back paddock. “The heifers have yielded another thirty calves in the last fortnight,” he chortled happily. “I think it must be the better quality grass.”
Maihi took over the kitchen, heating up the casserole and dishing up portions for everyone. She took a peek at Jas and found him still flaked out on the rug, so left some for him in the pot. They ate companionably. Afterwards, the visitors examined the photos of Hana’s grandbabies saying all the right things about how cute they were. If they noticed the characteristic features of Elizabeth’s Down syndrome they made no comment, drawn only to that extra unpaired gene which gave her such joy and love for everyone. Blissful happiness radiated out of the small girl like kryptonite, affecting all who saw her smiles pouring out of each photograph like a tangible thing. She was the most loving creature Hana had ever encountered in her whole life.
“Oh!” a disappointed little voice appeared from next to Hemi’s elbow and Jas’ tousled head nosed its way in to look at the pictures. “You’ve seen my baby without me!” He sounded so hurt and sad, Hana’s eyes shrouded with guilt. She looked frantically at Amy for help, but Logan came to the rescue first.
“Come with me, mate, I’ve got something for you.” He reached out his hand to the little boy and Jas took it, clutching his blanket in the other hand and following Logan from the room, but not before he eyeballed Hana such a withering look of betrayal, she felt actual physical pain.
He came back in Logan’s arms, riding high on his hip and smiling. He still clutched the blanket but in his other hand he held a frame. He leaned precariously towards Amy, as Logan let him slide down onto his mother’s knee. “Look.”
It was a picture of all three of Izzie’s children sitting on the sofa in their living room. Logan took it and printed off a couple of copies in Invercargill. Elizabeth sat in the middle squinting at the camera and Izzie had one of her little arms around each tiny boy. It was an unbelievably touching photo.
Hana marvelled at the sleight of hand that Logan must have used, to get the photo into the frame so quickly. She looked harder. The frame had contained a small aerial photo of the hotel and usually sat on their dressing table. Hana looked across at her husband and knew she needed to look harder at the good things about him and stop being so quick to always see the worst. “Thanks, babe,” she mouthed to him.
Jas took his bowl of food from Logan with a sweet little smile and dug into it with enthusiasm. The blanket slipped to the ground, but the photo frame stayed clamped in the little fingers of his left hand. Something told Hana he would be sleeping with it and that it was probably going to kindy on Monday. Jas caught Bodie looking at him and pointed his spoon at the glass, getting tomato on it. “Them’s my fambly,” prod, prod, “I’m gonna look after them all forever!”
Bodie smiled at his son proudly, but it was Logan who Jas looked across at. Possibly only Jas and Hana heard the man whisper so very quietly, “Good boy! You always do that!”
Hana enjoyed the house full of people that Friday evening. After the busyness of Izzie’s house, with congregation members popping in and out all the time, taking over and seeming to be part of one big family, Culver’s Cottage felt empty. Maihi and Hemi left on the quad bike around ten and despite the offer of beds for the night, Bodie insisted he take Amy and Jas home and then go back to the police block. He hugged Hana with real sincerity as he left, holding her tightly as though trying to communicate something through his spirit. He shook hands solemnly with Logan and there was a sense of truce and blessed equilibrium.
Hana stood on the cold porch, her left hand on her bump and her other reaching around Logan’s butt, her fingers stuffed into his back pocket. They waved until the BMW disappeared around
the bend and the headlights bounced down towards the road.
Long after Bodie’s car noises were gone and the night life returned to its hunting and calling, Hana and Logan looked out onto the shimmering river, threading away into the distance. A cool breeze ruffled their hair, but the stars overhead aptly compensated for it. The Milky Way soared over their house like a huge stripe of light and dark, starkly bright against the pitch black either side. Logan gently pointed out constellations to Hana, leaning down so their faces were close together and letting her follow his direction until she spotted the delights of creation in front of her face. From below, it looked as though one small part of the sky for about a mile across was a riot of activity and busyness. A community of luminous flecks interacted and played, holding each other at arm’s length while the rest of the sky was dark, empty and impenetrable. “It looks amazing from my ridge at the top of the mountain,” Logan said. “I’ll show you one day.”
“The land your grandmother left you?” Hana asked, still staring upwards. Logan nodded into the darkness and squeezed her hand.
“Yeah.”
“I’d like to see it,” Hana said. “Will you point things out to me?”
“Soon,” he replied, his voice wistful.
Du Rose Legacy
Chapter 29
Back at work, Hana caught up quickly. Increasingly, she found her job boring and monotonous. “I’ve worked here too long,” she told Logan.
“Maybe it’s time for a change then,” he soothed gently, a wistful look in his grey eyes.
There seemed to be so little variation to Hana’s role and she could operate on autopilot. While that was great for a working mother, a grieving widow and a lonely woman, she now began to find it restrictive. Previous careers advisors had either chugged along on the same old track or like Sheila, come in full of ideas and suggestions. One by one, they always moved on, to be replaced with yet more change.