“Kay.” I felt sick.
He shook his head. “This summer. Before you left. That night.”
My head was going to explode with embarrassment. “It’s OK. It doesn’t matter. It’s fine.”
His head snapped sideways, his eyes confused. “What do you mean?”
He didn’t want me. A nervous laugh answered his question. “It’s cool. No worries.”
“But your dad, he was pretty upset.”
I looked at him, confused by his words. Now, I didn’t understand.
“Your dad was upset,” he attempted to explain.
I blushed. “I’m sorry about that.” God, was I sorry. So this was a guilt thing. Apologize to the little girl who got in trouble.
“No, don’t be. It wasn’t your fault. He had a right to be upset. I should never have fallen asleep.”
“Oh, absolutely. Sleep is off limits in our house.” I laughed nervously again. Sleep is off limits in our house???
He lowered his brow and though he smiled, his eyes were serious. I found my cheek with my teeth.
“It was a nice night,” I said and couldn’t believe those words just came out either. I stared at the grass.
He stopped before we went in the cafe and brushed my cheek with his thumb but said nothing.
The place was loud and we stood in line to order.
“Hey, Runt.”
I tensed and whirled around to see Grant.
“Grant, stop calling me that,” I said forcefully.
Zach leaned in and grasped my hand. My heart fluttered and I glanced up at him. Grant frowned as he noticed our hands and with his elbow, he nudged the guy behind him. Ryan turned slowly around, eyeing us. Self conscious, I loosened my hold on Zach’s hand. Ryan scooted out of the booth. Oh, God.
“You are an idiot.” Ryan scowled at me.
Tears swelled in my eyes. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.
“Hey!” Zach cautioned Ryan and reached for my hand again.
Shocked, my eyes searched Zach’s angry face. No one stood up to Ryan. I watched Ryan’s lips purse and his eyes roll at Grant; then Ryan spun me in the opposite direction before Zach got my hand and shoved me out the door.
“Freshman-can’t-leave-campus.You-have-a-closed-lunch, dumbass.” His words were slow and well articulated.
I fought off the urge to cry. “I didn’t know.”
Zach stepped up. “It’s my fault. I’m the one who asked her. And she’s not a dumbass.” Zach shot Ryan a look daring him to a challenge. This time, Zach’s hand slid perfectly into mine. “Let’s get you back,” he said.
“You’re gonna have a detention and I already told you…he’s too freaking old for you,” Ryan shouted behind us. “You better leave her alone, Owens.”
I was mortified. I was ecstatic. The first guy who’d ever stood up to my brother and at this moment I didn’t even have the courage to look at him. I stole my hand from his and folded my arms across my chest, barely catching a glimpse of him; and his mouth turned down at the corners. Was he upset or scared or disgusted? Maybe Ryan frightened him. But he didn’t look frightened.
“I’m sorry, I ruined your lunch.” Those were the only words I could offer. I was sure things couldn’t get worse.
“I’m the one who should be sorry. I didn’t know the rule.” He quickened his pace as we entered the school and I struggled to keep up, but wondered if he was trying to get away from me. “God, things are so different here. I’ll try to get you out of the detention. Maybe they’ll give it to me.” He smiled apologetically.
“It’s OK.” My voice was weak. I was weak.
“What’s the deal with you and Meiers?”
Meiers? “Grant?”
“Emma! Over here,” Ali shouted.
Zach automatically steered us in that direction. They were closing down the lunch line and I could read the thought on his face. I smiled. “It’s OK. I’m not that hungry.” I was starving.
“Miss Hendricks. This week you get a free pass for being late. Are you aware of the closed lunch for freshman?” Mr. Ming, our principal, asked confronting me.
I nodded. “I am now.” I looked around and Zach was gone. Good thing he didn’t have to witness my admonishment.
“Hey. Where have you been?” Lauren asked.
I told them what had happened and they were awestruck with the Zach thing. Who was I kidding…I was awestruck.
“He’s a senior,” Ali said as if I wasn’t aware of that fact.
“Zach Owens likes you?” Lauren questioned like it was an inconceivable thought.
“Thank you,” I said sarcastically. I hadn’t told my two best friends about the out of this world kiss we shared two months ago. I knew they’d enjoy it almost as much as I had so I told the story.
“So anyway. It was perfect. He smelled so good…and God…the way he wrapped his arms around me…it’s like I fit perfectly. His hands were so big and his kiss—oh—my—God.” I closed my eyes as the words came out and remembered just like I had all summer. “I so want to kiss him again.” There was a thud on the table; I opened my eyes. A package of individually wrapped peanut butter and crackers lay on the table in front of me. Across the table, Ali and Lauren’s eyes focused above my head. Ali’s mouth hung open and Lauren looked away. My heart dropped into my stomach and I felt sick. I tilted my head back till it bumped his chest and he tilted his head down until we stared at each other. He held my head in his palms, grinned then leaned in to my ear and whispered. “Eat.”
I buried my head in my hands. This was the best and worst day ever. The best because of Zach. The worst because I was a freshman, a runt, and a dumbass.
SEVEN
Zach
The first flights of stairs were easy at the speed I took them. When I finally reached the top, an ache ripped through my calves and I zipped into the bathroom. Empty. Thank God, though the rank urine stench was company enough.
I paced trying to breathe with my fingers laced behind my head, but the tension held its ground, stubbornly fighting me. I searched for something worthy of my fist but adding destruction of property to my juvenile record wouldn’t help. Settling, my foot made contact with a four inch metal pipe. The jolt brought me out of the emotional pit I’d fallen into, if only for a minute.
I caught sight of myself in the mirror. Leaving California was supposed to be a new start. I disgusted myself. Why was I so angry? Was it because I’d left everything I loved in the city? Was it about her douche bag brother who thought he could call the shots? Or maybe the rage of her father that night? The first girl who had really caught my attention and everyone around her hated me.
I replayed the events of the night her parents walked in, like I had all summer. Just what I needed, a family already questioning my intentions when I did nothing but kiss the fifteen year old girl. Her father was completely unwavering in his stance. It wasn’t fair and clearly obvious which parent Ryan took after.
The pain in my foot was diminishing and replaced with a pain in my chest. The inviting thought of her tongue tracing over my lip flooded back. I shook the thought from my mind. ‘I’m fifteen’ I heard over and over again in my head like a mantra. Not that fifteen was bad. I’d banged a fifteen year old before. But she was different. There was something about her that got me. Something about her that needed me. I adjusted my crotch and chuckled thinking about what she needed. Her kiss held innocence. I could only imagine the extent of her innocence.
I remembered sitting in my Jeep that night staring up at the house, not wanting to leave her there alone to fight our battle. OUR battle? The curtains in the front window pulled apart in the middle then closed. I wondered if it was her then figured it was probably her father.
“Shit!” I hissed as I pounded the steering wheel.
As I reversed down the drive, I watched the curtain, nothing. I rolled down the window and spit. As I licked the residue from my bottom lip, I tasted who I knew I was going to fight hard to forget.
Now, in the ba
throom of this pathetic high school, in this shithole excuse of a town, I decided exactly what I wanted and what I was going to get.
EIGHT
Emma
Cross Country meeting and first run today. I qualified for the state run last year but as an eighth grader, I wasn’t allowed to go. The expectations for me this year made me nervous. I’d run on the beach every day this summer and felt more than ready.
It was our second year with cross country and Ali and I were excited. We changed in the locker room and met Coach Jones on the track.
“All right, kids. There’s a storm movin’ in so we’re stayin’ on the track today. I want three miles. Twelve laps. I need your physicals in this basket before you run and take these forms home to your parents. Be sure you stretch. Our first meet is September 7th.”
Wow. No introductions or anything. Ali and I raised our brows simultaneously, giggled then started hamstring stretches.
“So, tell me about the beach.”
I shrugged. “Nothing to tell.”
“Yeah, but you were with your brother and Grant Meiers. It doesn’t get any better than that.”
Once upon a time, I would have agreed with her but not today. “Ali…Grant’s like my brother.”
“Yes. But he’s gorgeous and so is Ryan. Plus you’ve been in love with Grant since birth.”
I rolled my eyes. Had she seen Zach? “Come on. Let’s go.”
We made our way around the track as the football team burst onto the field. Could this be more perfect? My heart accelerated from the one lap around the track and skipped a beat or two when I spotted Zach, #18. I hadn’t seen him since lunch. I realized I would live every day for third period—who would have thought I’d be this excited about Advanced Algebra.
“Em?”
“What?”
“What’s it like?
“What?” My breathing had reached a sustainable level.
“A good kiss…I mean a really good kiss?”
I chuckled. “You ask like I’m all experienced. We kissed one time. And besides, you kissed Jacob after the spring dance.” I had no doubt my kiss beat hers.
“Oh, please. He pecked me like a chicken.”
I laughed out loud. “I don’t know, Al. It was great. Like I said at lunch before I got busted. How freaking embarrassing was that?”
Creepy dark clouds moved overhead and a light mist began to fall. As I rounded the corner, Zach, Ryan and Coach Saia stood together. Zach’s hands rested on his hip and he eyeballed Ryan, whose arms were flailing while he seemed to be berating the coach. I blinked hard to clear the rain accumulated on my lashes. Coach poked his finger in Ryan’s chest, said something and left them both. Zach began to step away and Ryan grabbed his arm. My stomach knotted as Ryan’s mouth began to move. Then, as if I’d called their names, they both looked at me. First Zach, then Ryan. My eyes dropped to the track.
“Did you use your tongue?”
“What?”
“Your tongue? When you kissed him?”
“ALI!” Oh my God. As distracted as I was, just the thought of it made my insides tingle.
“What? We’ve always told each other everything. Besides, I know you did or you would have said no.”
I bumped her pushing her sideways on the track but she fell back in rhythm. “A little. But it wasn’t like you shove the whole thing in; like in the movies…it’s softer…we just kind of touched them. I so can not believe I’m saying this.”
“Doesn’t Zach have a friend you could set me up with?”
Ali was so pretty with her thick blond hair and she’d blossomed sooner than me. At 5’5’’, she stood over me by five inches. Her bra size was probably a C and I was still an A, at best. Her complexion was her only downfall but she had a special soap and cream. Even Ryan thought she was hot—but he wouldn’t be caught dead dating a freshman.
“We’re not dating.”
We were on lap eight—only four to go and rain was coming down. Only on the corners could I get a glimpse of him. They were running two sets of offense. Ryan and Zach both quarterbacking. Uh-oh.
By lap twelve, my clothes were nearly dragging the ground and Ali and I headed back to the locker room.
Ryan’s truck was a good jaunt so we didn’t bother to change into dry clothes, grabbed our book bags and darted to the parking lot. The truck was, of course, locked. Football must have been over because the guys were no longer on the field. I dropped the tailgate and we waited in the downpour.
“So, how was Austin this summer?” she asked bumping my shoulder with hers.
“As gorgeous and rich as ever. We held hands, twice, but in that I-love-you-like-a-sister-way.”
Ali shook her head. “Wow, you must really like Zach, because Grant Meiers said you looked good this morning and you and Austin held hands and those are the two boys you’ve been in love with for as long as I’ve known you.”
I grinned from ear to ear and shrugged.
“Isn’t Austin in college now?” she asked.
“Yep. Freshman.”
“Would Katie and Matt let you date a college guy?”
“Well, Austin’s different. I’ve known him for…forever. Doesn’t matter, Ryan wouldn’t let me date him or anybody.”
“What about Zach?”
“Hey, you two.” Ryan said. “Grab the blanket out of the carrier so you don’t ruin my leather.” He seemed annoyed.
Ali and I jumped out of the bed, grabbed the blanket, threw it in the cab and slid in finding relief from the pelting rain. A light tap at the window startled me. Zach stood at the passenger side window in the rain. Ryan rolled the window down from his side. I stared at Zach.
“What?” Ryan barked.
Zach’s eyes narrowed protecting them from the water. “I have your sister’s book.”
He passed the book to me through the window. “Sorry, it’s a little wet.”
I’d forgotten about my Algebra book. Why was he addressing my brother instead of me? “Thanks,” I whispered. His eyes met mine for a second then flickered away.
“Yup,” he said flatly.
The window went up and I watched him jog down the sidewalk. As I folded my arms across my chest, a frustrated sigh slid through my teeth.
Ali didn’t live far from the school and once she’d gotten out, I unleashed.
“Can you please tell me what that was about?” my voice was harsh.
“What?” he looked surprised at my anger.
“Zach! You weren’t even nice to him. Then today, at lunch, did you have to call me a dumbass?”
“You’re acting stupid, Em.” He turned up the knob on the radio, blaring the obnoxious hip-hop.
“Ryan. I’m not stupid. I like Zach and you were mean. I’m telling Mom and Dad what you said to me in front of everyone. I didn’t know I couldn’t leave and Zach didn’t either.”
He shrugged. “Maybe you’re both stupid.”
“What is your problem?” I flipped the radio to a different station. “He’s nice and I think he likes me. Besides he’s on your team. Coach won’t let you be mean.”
He pulled the truck into our driveway and thrust it into park. “Team has nothing to do with it when he wants my position.” Ryan jerked his backpack from behind the seat and slammed the door.
The truck was quiet. So. That’s what this was about. Football. Zach wanted to be the quarterback? I shivered at the thought of Zach and Ryan going head to head. Football was Ryan’s life. He’d already gotten a letter of interest from U of O and UCLA. No one from Ashland had been recruited D-1 before. I couldn’t imagine Coach Saia taking that from him. I had a hunch this wasn’t going to turn out well—no matter what.
I started dinner, as expected, and went with the easiest thing I could find. Spaghetti. By the time I’d browned the beef, Dad had gotten home. He always beat Mom but realtor hours were weird. My dad was a CPA and partner in a firm downtown and except for the first four months of the year, his hours were flexible.
“Hey, big freshman girl. How was the first day?”
“Fine,” I lied, sliding the uncooked pasta into the boiling water.
“How are your classes?”
“Good.” There was some truth.
“Where’s your brother?”
“Upstairs, holed up in his room, pouting like a little girl.”
My father’s raised brows wanted further explanation.
“Some guy wants his position in football. He is freakin’ out about it.”
“I’ll go talk to him.” He kissed my head and grabbed a bite of the cooked beef. I smacked his hand with the spatula.
Ryan had been on the phone when Dad went upstairs and now dinner was the time for sorting this out.
“Your sister said someone else is wanting to quarterback?”
Ryan shoved a wad of spaghetti in his mouth and eyeballed me.
“Sounds like someone is going to have to do a little better.” Dad continued.
“Matt. He works hard as it is.” Mom defended her son.
“Katie. He’s never had competition before. He’s never had to work. He’s a few months away from signing with the Ducks.”
Ryan shot his chair back and stood. “Never had to work? I work my ass off, Dad. Here. At the beach. It doesn’t matter. I’m in shape and ready. The reason, ZACH…” his name was emphasized in my direction. “wants my position is because I missed the first week of conditioning due to the damn mandatory family getaway. So, he filled in and evidently did a great job. So coach wants to try us both there.”
“Honey, sit down, please.” Mom tried to calm Ryan, her voice always soothing.
Dad faced me. I knew this was going to happen. “Is this your Zach…the ‘we just fell asleep’ Zach?”
Ryan bellied up to the table again and grinned at me. “I don’t think Zach slept much this summer. Rumor has it he and Estelle became pretty good friends.”
“Shut up, Ryan.” Estelle? I wasn’t sure the noodles were going to go down my throat.
Old Enough to Love... (Just One of the Guys) Page 4