Her breath came in short, shallow pants as the pressure between her legs built. “Oh, God. God,” she cried, twisting her hips away, but Garrett followed their movements with his finger. He didn’t allow her to break their contact.
“Garrett, I can’t—” She bit her lip, her head turning fitfully from side to side.
“Yes you can,” he whispered huskily against her neck. The stubble along his tight jawline was abrasive against the softness of the top of her breasts and that was driving her slowly mad too.
His finger continued its relentless assault, again, again. “Garrett!” she called, just before she spiraled into oblivion, a feeling unlike any she’d ever known consuming her body.
* * *
When Jane finally surfaced from her haze, she realized that Garrett had pulled down her skirts and was tenderly unwrapping the cravat from around her wrists. They were a bit sore, but deliciously so. He rubbed them individually and carefully pulled her hands back down to her sides. He gathered one of her hands in his, brought it to his lips and kissed her knuckles. He was still breathing heavily. He pressed his slick forehead to hers.
She reached for his hips, wanting to feel his erection, but he pulled her hand away, pinning it over her head again. “No,” he said huskily. He kissed her again fiercely. “Not unless you want me to take you tonight, right here on this settee.”
Truthfully, she’d considered it for a moment. If him taking her on this settee was anything like what he’d just done to her, she was definitely interested. But that would complicate things. Complicate them a great deal. Instead, she kissed him back. The man had just given her the most amazing moments of her life. A kiss in return seemed inadequate.
“That was … incredible.” The word seemed insufficient, even to her own ears.
“I’m obsessed with your perfume,” he murmured. His breathing was still hot and heavy in her ear. He kissed her there, running his tongue along her earlobe, and she bucked beneath him again. Gooseflesh covered her neck and arms. Oh, what this man did to her.
“So?” he asked, nuzzling beneath her ear.
“So?” she echoed, barely able to discern his words with his mouth still on her skin.
“What do you think?”
Her eyes were still closed, but she had to smile at that. She took a long, shuddering breath. “You’re right, so much better than reading a book.”
“And?” he prompted.
“And it seems rakes can teach bluestockings a thing or two.”
She felt his answering smile against the skin of her neck.
“Furthermore,” she added, clearing her throat self-consciously. “I think we’re going to need to do that again.”
“Really?”
“Yes. I’m not entirely certain I caught all the nuances in that first lesson. I may need remedial work.”
He captured her mouth with his again. “Happy to be your tutor.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Jane sat next to Lucy in the second row of the quaint, stone village church for the wedding of Lady Cassandra Monroe to Julian Swift, Earl of Swifdon. The weather was glorious—cool and bright—for the ceremony that was held at ten o’clock in the morning. The vicar stood in front of the crowded pews, his white vestments gleaming and a broad smile on his face. No doubt his little church hadn’t seen this much excitement since Cass’s own parents had wed.
“She looks breathtaking,” Lucy whispered to Jane, tears in her eyes. “Look at me, I’m crying already.”
“She does look beautiful,” Jane replied in a whisper. Indeed, Cass was magnificent in a glorious white and silver-beaded gown with a long train and a matching veil. “Thank heavens, the red spot on her nose disappeared.”
“Yes, quite courteous of it, was it not?” Lucy said with a laugh.
Julian looked every bit the handsome soldier turned earl in his dashing military dress uniform.
Cass’s mother, Lady Moreland, sat in the front row. The woman nearly convulsed in a fit of joyous tears while her husband tried to comfort her.
“At least she’ll stop hating me,” Lucy whispered to Jane from where they sat in the row behind the Morelands. “I may have married a duke, but the Swifdon title is far older and more prestigious than Claringdon’s. That must be why she’s crying.”
“I resent that,” Derek said from beside his wife. Lucy elbowed him.
Jane gave Lucy a warning look but couldn’t entirely stop her smile.
“What did your mother say when you told her Mrs. Bunbury had to leave this morning?” Lucy whispered.
“Shhh,” Jane countered. Her mother was sitting just two spots away, on the other side of her father. Jane lowered her voice even further. “I told her Mrs. Bunbury had been overcome with a fit of heat yesterday and had compounded that error by eating something that did not agree with her.” Jane smiled slyly. “She’s well on her way to London by now.”
Lucy pressed her lips together and nodded. She, too, kept her voice especially low. “I’m ever so glad to hear it.”
Derek eyed the two ladies skeptically and shook his head.
It was true. Now that Mrs. Bunbury had been dispatched, Jane was happily free of her first and biggest problem. Her second problem, Mrs. Langford, remained of course, but that woman didn’t frighten her. Now that Jane knew what the widow was capable of, she intended to stay well away from her. After tomorrow, when all of the houseguests returned to London, doing so would be quite simple. Mrs. Langford might have declared her intentions toward Garrett, but if there was any doubt as to where Garrett’s affections lay, he’d proven them to Jane last night.
Jane took a deep breath and concentrated on watching Cass and Julian standing up at the altar together declaring their love for each other. It was beautiful, truly. The smile on the faces of both the bride and the groom declared to the entire assembly how deeply in love they were. Lucy was crying. Even big, strong war hero Derek looked a bit choked up. Jane had never been one to cry. Her stiff upper lip was something of which she was particularly proud, but listening to Cass and Julian take their wedding vows did tug at her heart.
The vicar’s voice boomed through the church. “Julian Nicholas James Swift, wilt thou have this woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy estate of matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honor, and keep her in sickness and in health; forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?”
Jane caught her breath. The back of her throat burned. She’d never experienced anything like it during a wedding. Lucy made a sobbing noise and Derek patted his wife’s knee.
Julian’s eyes shone with love and pride. “I will,” he intoned.
The vicar turned to Cass. “Cassandra Elizabeth Louisa Monroe, wilt thou have this man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God’s ordinance in the holy estate of matrimony? Wilt thou obey him, and serve him, love, honor, and keep him in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all others, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?”
Cass’s voice was strong and sure. “I will.”
Lucy pushed her handkerchief up to her mouth to absorb another sob.
Jane pressed her lips together, hard. Other than the obey part, that had been lovely. Truly lovely. And she’d never seen Cass so happy. Pure radiant joy shone from her face. All the years Cass had written Julian, hoped he’d come back from war safely, had culminated in this beautiful moment. Jane had to shake her head against the burn behind her eyes this time. A movement to the left caught her attention. She glanced over to see Garrett leaning slightly forward, smiling at her softly. He and his mother were sitting farther down the long row.
Jane returned his smile with a tentative one of her own before returning her attention to the ceremony. Garrett looked especially fine today in his formal morning coat. His dark hair brushed the collar and the black brought out the color in his eyes. They looked dark green.
Perhaps marriage wouldn’t be so awful after all.
The thought came out of nowhere and struck Jane in the chest. She gasped. Lucy gave her a quick, questioning look but Jane barely shook her head to indicate nothing was amiss.
She surreptitiously looked over at Garrett again. So far she hadn’t thought beyond the house party and their little, ahem, flirtation, but they would have to have a talk at some point, the two of them. That much was clear. Would he be contemplating proposing marriage? Jane plucked at the neck of her gown. She couldn’t think about that now. It was too much.
The fact was, in addition to Mrs. Bunbury, and Isabella Langford, Jane had a third problem, and it might well be the most pressing. She had the nagging feeling that she was falling in love with Garrett Upton. It seared her brain every time she had the thought, coming back to haunt her again and again. Each time she tried to push it away, it returned, more insistent than before.
She was surprised to think it. Upton had proven to be funny, intelligent, and well read. The well read part alone was enough to send her halfway to being in love with him. If the first edition Mary Wollstonecraft hadn’t got her, quoting it certainly would. Add to that the fact that the man was gorgeous and knew how to do amazing things with his mouth and fingers, and she was nearly without hope.
She couldn’t tell Upton she loved him. Could she? Lucy had convinced her he loved her, but Jane wanted to hear it from him. It was far too frightening a pronouncement for her to be the first to make it. But butterflies, of all poetry-dwelling, nauseatingly happy things, fluttered in her belly every time she thought about Garrett. When she caught his gaze again and he gave her that sensuous half-smile of his, the butterflies doubled.
She mustn’t think about such things right now. All she needed to do was enjoy the ceremony and look forward to tonight. Her ankle was still sore, but perhaps she could muddle through a waltz with Garrett. Just one. She’d remember it forever. A sly smile spread across her lips. Aside from the waltz, she hoped tonight would be similar to last night actually.
She was going straight to hell for thinking about it in a church of all places, but ooh, last night. Heat rushed between her legs at the memory. The things they’d done. The things they’d almost done. She’d nearly begged him to take her right there on the settee in her friend’s drawing room. Not very ladylike and certainly not very bluestocking spinsterish of her, but that was perhaps the best part. She plucked at the neck of her gown. It was getting warm in the church with such a large crush. Her thoughts were not helping.
Jane turned her attention back to the ceremony and watched with delight as her two beloved friends promised their lives to each other.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
After the wedding, the entire party had a breakfast feast on the lawn at the Moreland estate. Tables were set up and covered with huge white linens. Lilacs and white roses festooned each of them. Colorful ribbons of green and lavender had been strung above the tables with poles and children ran and shouted and laughed. There was nary a cloud in the sky and the smell of the fresh flowers along with the slight breeze made the entire affair magical.
Jane was stuck sitting next to a family member of Cass’s, some sort of knight. She couldn’t help glancing over at Garrett’s table time and again. They sat only a few yards from each other. He was usually watching her.
The rest of the day was a blur with Jane and Cass and Lucy all hugging one another, wishing Cass the best, and congratulating her groom. Jane and Lucy helped Cass prepare for the wedding ball, and then they all settled in to take naps so they might be refreshed for the dancing.
Jane snuggled beneath her coverlet, just about to nod off, when her mother came into her room. “Jane, dear, you haven’t said. Have you met anyone special since you’ve been here? A gentleman perhaps.”
Normally Jane would have rolled her eyes or pretended to be asleep already. Her mother asked her this same question of every party she’d been to since her come-out. For the first time in forever Jane could actually say yes.
She breathed in the lavender scent from her pillow and squeezed her eyes closed. She wasn’t ready to admit it to her mother yet. She didn’t want to engage her mother’s hopes for a … what? A marriage? Jane hadn’t considered that possibility, herself. She’d barely begun to enjoy kissing Upton. Marriage was far too much to consider at present.
“I’ve met some wonderful people here, Mama, and come to know some of them better than before,” she replied cryptically. “I’ll see you tonight.” She rolled over and pulled the covers to her chin.
* * *
The wedding ball was spectacular. The dancing was marvelous. There were several sets of La Boulangère, cotillions, quadrilles, and even a Scottish reel or two. The waltzes came and went while Jane waited for her ankle to comply. At least that awful Mrs. Langford had the good sense to stay far across the room. Owen Monroe, it appeared, was taken with the widow. He was spending a great deal of time in her company, poor man. When Owen wasn’t there, Daphne Swift seemed to take up the task of speaking with the woman. Poor, sweet Daphne.
Garrett had helped his mother get a plate of food and danced with her to one of the reels while Jane and Lucy watched and laughed and clapped along. Aunt Mary, for her advanced years, was a wonderful sport. She’d hugged Cass soundly and declared how happy she was about her wedding to Lord Swifdon. “I must admit, dear, when you were in Bath last summer, I was convinced you should take the duke up on his courtship, but all’s well that ends well, isn’t it?” The older woman patted Cass’s arm.
“Yes, Aunt Mary. That’s absolutely right,” Cass replied with a laugh.
Julian pulled his bride’s hand to his mouth and kissed the back of it. His eyes sparkled with love and admiration. “I couldn’t agree more.”
Aunt Mary sighed. “You two are so perfect for each other. I just wish my darling Garrett would find someone special. I’d like to meet my grandchildren before I’m too old to know who they are.”
Garrett’s eyes nearly bulged from his skull. “Don’t get any ideas, Lucy,” he growled as Lucy opened her mouth to speak. “Mother, please do not encourage her.”
“Lucy needs no encouragement,” Aunt Mary replied with a wink.
Soon afterward, their little party broke up to speak and dance and share time with others, but Garrett remained by Jane’s side. He ensured she had a proper chair to sit in along the sidelines and that her foot was propped up, and he brought her a glass of champagne and a plate of teacakes.
“You do know the way to a lady’s heart,” Jane said, laughing when he returned with the teacakes.
The look Garrett gave her was so serious, so sincere. She wished she hadn’t mentioned her heart. Had it been too much?
“Dance with me,” he whispered as another waltz began to play. “We’ll mind your ankle.”
She stood and placed the plate of teacakes on the chair. “I should like nothing better.”
The dance was lovely. They didn’t speak. No ribbing or word play or teasing or taunts. Garrett whirled Jane around and around and they stared into each other’s eyes as if they were the only two people in the room.
After the music ended, Garrett escorted her back to her seat. “How’s your ankle? The dancing didn’t make it worse, I hope.”
“It held up just fine.”
“Excellent.” He tugged at his cuff and arched a brow at her. “In that case, would you care to … see the portraits?”
Jane returned his knowing smile. “I do still have the key.”
“I’m quite glad to hear that.”
He left the room first, and Jane followed ten minutes later. She had to remind herself not to run up the stairs and risk hurting her ankle again. Once she got there, she took a deep breath and entered the room. Garrett was there, just inside the door. He immediately pulled her into his arms and kissed her. She kissed him back with all the pent-up longing and emotion she felt.
“Wait. I should lock the door,” she whispered against his mouth.
“No, Jane. Not tonight. I’ve thought about it. We can
’t do this here again. It’s too dangerous. Meet me later? In my bedchamber?”
Jane stood on her tiptoes and kissed him again. Her thoughts were a blur. He wasn’t just asking her for a few kisses. He was asking her to spend the night with him. Nerves had replaced the butterflies in her stomach, but her entire being was screaming yes.
Garrett cleared his throat. “I know we need to have a talk first, a serious one, and I—”
“No.” Jane couldn’t think about that part. It was too much. She only wanted to live in this magical place for one more night. “Not tonight. Let’s not talk tonight.”
“Fine, tomorrow morning then. But you’ll come to my room, tonight?”
Jane took a deep breath. She wanted it. She wanted him. She was a spinster, after all. What did she care about her useless virginity? The only thing that concerned her was the danger of becoming heavy with child.
“Garrett, if we— I don’t want to have a baby.”
“Don’t worry.” He whispered into her mouth. “I have something for that.”
She nodded.
He kissed her again. “Jane, have you ever?”
She shook her head. “No.”
He traced her cheekbones with his fingers. “Of course not.” He seemed tender, so tender. “Don’t worry. It’s going to hurt … a bit, at first, but I can make it good for you. I promise.”
“I know it’s going to hurt, Upton, I’ve read about it.”
He couldn’t help his smile. “It’s just like you to think you know all about something you’ve never done before.”
She laughed. “I’ll have to get away from Mama. Perhaps I’ll tell her I’m going to bed sick.” She smiled. “I must have eaten whatever Mrs. Bunbury ate.”
Garrett pressed his forehead to hers. “Perfect. Come after the ball. Two o’clock?” he whispered, kissing her once more.
Jane rubbed her nose against his. “I want to … I do, but…”
“Think about it. If you’re not there, I’ll know you changed your mind.”
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