by Penny Jordan
Oliver had reached the bed and was scrambling onto it. As she reached down to help him Kate saw the labels on the new clothes and her mouth compressed, her panic returning. Expensive designer labels! How on earth was she going to repay Sean for them? She had only ever been able to afford to buy Oliver good second-hand clothes, and sometimes new things from chain stores.
‘Mummy, you’re properly awake at last!’ Oliver beamed as he kissed her enthusiastically. ‘Look what I painted for you!’ he said, triumphantly showing her the brightly painted paper he was holding.
‘It’s me and you and Sean, and Sean’s house where we’re all going to live.’ Immediately Kate went still, keeping her arm around her son whilst she looked accusingly at Sean. Her heart was pounding so heavily that it hurt.
‘What—?’ she began fiercely, but Sean was already lifting Oliver off the bed.
‘Come on,’ he was saying to Oliver. ‘Let’s go downstairs and make Mummy some tea. We’ll talk later,’ he added quietly to Kate.
‘Yes, and then I’ll read you a story, Mummy,’ Oliver told her happily. ‘We’ve read you a story every night—haven’t we, Sean? But you weren’t properly awake. Having lots of sleep made you get better, though,’ he informed Kate importantly. With a graveness that tore at her heart, Oliver continued, ‘You have to have lots of water to drink, doesn’t she, Sean?’
‘Lots of water, and now some proper food,’ Sean agreed calmly.
Kate could feel her eyes smarting with emotional tears as Sean disappeared with Oliver.
She had been miserably worried about her illness affecting Oliver emotionally, but now it was plain to her that she had worried unnecessarily. Because Oliver had had Sean. Because Oliver had had his father.
A huge groundswell of emotional pain began deep down inside her. How could Sean behave as he was doing with Oliver and yet at the same time so completely reject the fact that Oliver was his son? And as for Oliver’s innocent remark about them going to live with Sean!
Tiredness began to swamp her, overwhelming her angry attempts to fight it off and remain awake.
When Sean walked into the bedroom five minutes later she was fast asleep. Putting down the tray holding the pot of tea he had brewed for her, and the light omelette he had just made, Sean went over to look at her, frowning deeply as he did so. The previous day the doctor had told him that he believed she was over the worst, and today, with her return to full consciousness, Sean had seen that for himself.
He was reluctant to wake her up, but he knew that she needed to start eating again in order to build up her strength.
Going over to her, he reached out to touch her, and then hesitated. The strap of the nightdress he had bought her when he had been forced to go out and buy food and extra clothes for Oliver had slipped down over her exposed shoulder.
Without thinking, his actions still on the automatic pilot of having looked after her, he curled his fingers around the strap and started to tug it back up.
Kate woke up immediately, her whole body tensing as she saw Sean leaning over her.
The sight of the afternoon sunshine falling against his skin made her stifle a small sound deep in her throat. She had never admitted it to him, but she could still remember how all those years ago, when they had first met, she had deliberately walked past the building site where he was working, unable to stop her avid gaze feeding hungrily on the sight of his naked torso, pinpricks of dangerous excitement prickling all over her body. Just as they were doing now, Kate realised, as the emotions she was fighting to hold in check swept through her.
She must not allow herself to react to him like this, she told herself fiercely. She must not weaken and let him touch her emotions. She must not forget now much he had hurt her and, much more importantly, how much he could still hurt Oliver.
Thinking of her son gave her the strength to drag her gaze from Sean’s and look pointedly at where his hand still rested on her shoulder.
‘You must let me know how much you have spent on mine and Oliver’s behalf,’ she told him stiffly. She knew just from the feel of the fabric against her skin that the nightdress would have cost far more than she would ever have paid—and far more than she could possibly afford. But no way was she going to be beholden to him, even though she felt sick at the thought of having to waste her small precious savings on such unnecessary luxuries.
‘There are several things we need to discuss,’ Sean told her equably. ‘But first you must have something to eat.’
Rebelliously Kate looked at him, the words ‘I’m not hungry’ dying on her lips as he added gently, ‘Doctor’s orders, Kate, and if necessary I can assure you I am perfectly willing to feed you myself.’
‘That won’t be necessary.’
‘Good.’
Unable to contain herself any longer, she burst out, ‘I can’t be off work for three weeks.’
‘You can’t not be,’ he corrected her curtly. ‘And personally I don’t think that your doctor is going to change his mind and allow you to return to work sooner. I take it that you haven’t found another job as yet?’
Kate’s mouth compressed whilst she contemplated lying to him, but then she was forced to admit that she was unlikely to get away with doing so. ‘No,’ she answered tersely. ‘But I intend to spend the time I have to have off work looking for one.’
‘On the contrary,’ Sean told her firmly. ‘What you are going to be spending the next three weeks doing is recuperating, as I am sure your doctor will inform you. But if you don’t believe me you can check with him yourself. He’ll be coming back to see you tomorrow, to make sure you’re well enough to travel to...’ He paused, and then continued coolly, ‘To my home.’
‘What?’ Kate went hot and then cold with shock and disbelief. ‘Oh, no. No way!’ Kate shook her head violently. ‘No way am I ever, ever going to live with you again, Sean...’
‘Oliver is already looking forward to it,’ he said blandly.
Kate felt as though she had been kicked in the stomach. ‘You had no right to say anything to Oliver. Nor to use him to—’
‘To what?’ Sean challenged her. ‘Right now you need someone to look after you—someone to look after you both. Physically and financially,’ he emphasised unkindly.
‘You don’t know anything about my financial situation,’ Kate denied hotly. ‘And you have no right—’
‘I know that on the salary you are being paid, given the outgoings you must have, you will have to budget carefully.’ He gave a small shrug to conceal from her what he was really feeling. ‘Logically it seems unlikely that you have a financial cushion to fall back on if, for instance, you are unable to work. As is the case now!’
Kate could feel a dangerous prickle in her throat as her emotions reacted to his extremely accurate assessment of her situation.
‘I may not have your wealth, Sean, but I don’t need your charity, or—’ she began, only to be cut short as Sean interrupted her.
‘Not for yourself, maybe, Kate. But you do need it for Oliver’s sake—and don’t bother trying to deny it!’ He gave another dismissive shrug and turned slightly away from her so that she couldn’t read his expression.
Helplessly Kate acknowledged that what Sean had said to her was true. For Oliver’s sake she had no option other than to give in and agree to what Sean was suggesting.
Besides, wasn’t there somewhere deep inside her still a foolish little shoot of hope that, given time and the opportunity to be with Oliver, Sean would somehow recognise and accept that Ollie was his child? And a part of her wanted that desperately—not for her own sake, but for their son’s.
‘The only person you have is me!’ Sean told her abruptly. ‘Unless, of course, you want to get in touch with Oliver’s father,’ he added harshly, shattering her fragile fantasy.
Kate felt sick with rage and pain. S
he wanted to scream at him that she did not need anyone, and that if she did need someone she would die before she let that someone be him.
‘Carol will help me,’ she began sharply, but Sean immediately shook his head.
‘She has her own family to look after; you know that! And besides—’
‘Besides what?’ she demanded angrily.
‘Besides, I don’t think it would be in Oliver’s best interests.’
For a few seconds Kate was rendered speechless with disbelief. When she did find her voice she could hear it trembling with the intensity of her rage.
‘You don’t think—! Since when have you concerned yourself with Oliver’s best interests? Or don’t you think it would be in Oliver’s “best interests”,’ she mimicked, ‘to be acknowledged and loved by his father?’
‘Oh, for God’s sake.’
Kate flinched as she heard the savagery in his voice.
‘Regardless of who Oliver’s father is, you are his mother and Oliver should be near you. If Carol were to look after you both that would necessitate her having Oliver spending a great deal of time at her house, away from you. I’m not denying that she would do her best for both of you, but...’
Kate closed her eyes. She knew exactly what Sean was saying, and what he was not saying—and, even worse, she knew that he was right.
‘So who are you proposing will look after us?’ she asked defeatedly.
‘Me.’
Kate lifted her head and stared at him. ‘You? No... That’s not possible!’
‘On the contrary, as I think I have proved these last few days, it is perfectly possible.’
‘But you have to work. You’ve got your business to run,’ Kate reminded him wildly.
‘I can run my business from home,’ Sean answered laconically. ‘And it seems to me that I can look after you and Oliver and work much more easily in a house with more than two bedrooms. At least that way I’ll have my own bed to sleep in.’
His own bed!
Kate could feel her anger giving way to panic. This was definitely not a line of conversation she wanted to pursue.
‘So where is this house with more than two bedrooms?’ she forced herself to demand. ‘Oliver is very happy at nursery, and I don’t want him upset.’
‘Oliver won’t be upset. It’s only for a short while, and he needs to get used to change as he’ll soon be leaving nursery anyway, to start school.’ He started to frown. ‘Your nearest infant school is nearly ten miles away...’
‘I know that,’ Kate snapped at him. Of course she knew it! Hadn’t she been worrying herself sick for the last year about the fact that the village was too small to have its own school?
‘Oliver has got used to having me around,’ Sean said abruptly as he walked away from the bed and stood with his back to her, looking out of the window. ‘It seems unfair and definitely not in his best interests to subject him to further changes. He’s naturally been very upset by your illness, but he’s looking forward to the three of us being together.’
The three of us!
A fierce pang of sharp pain stabbed at Kate’s heart. How could she deny her son the opportunity to be with his father?
CHAPTER SEVEN
‘NOW, DON’T WORRY about the cottage. I’ll keep an eye on it whilst you’re away, and it will be here waiting for you when you come back,’ Carol assured Kate comfortingly as she bustled around Kate’s bedroom, packing her clothes in the suitcases Sean had provided. ‘That is if you are coming back,’ she added slyly, giving Kate a questioning look. ‘Sean’s made no bones about telling everyone that the two of you were married.’
Carol’s teasing expression changed to one of anxious concern as she saw the tears filling Kate’s eyes. ‘Oh, Kate, I’m so sorry,’ she apologised.
‘It’s all right,’ Kate assured her. ‘I suppose feeling emotionally weak is just another manifestation of this wretched virus. Why has this had to happen to me? All I want is for the next three weeks to be over and for me to be back on my feet,’ she told her friend fiercely.
‘Mmm. Well, Oliver is certainly enjoying having Sean in his life,’ Carol said with gentle warning. ‘On the way to school this morning I overheard him trying to convince Sean that a puppy was an essential addition to his life.’
Kate groaned. ‘He’s been on about having a dog ever since he saw the puppies at the farm last year. I’d love to get him one, but it’s just not possible with me working.’
‘Heavens, I think Sean’s bought you and Oliver enough clothes to last twelve months, never mind three weeks.’ Carol laughed, ruefully. ‘He’ll be back soon, and I know he wants to get off as soon as he can. Where is this house you’re going to be staying, by the way?’ she asked Kate conversationally, and she ruthlessly squashed the last of the new clothes Sean had insisted on buying for Kate and Oliver into the new cases, whilst Kate looked on unhappily.
‘I don’t know,’ she admitted, for the moment more concerned about her irritation with Sean for bringing yet more new clothes that morning than the location of his home.
‘Oliver and I aren’t charity cases, you know,’ she had thrown bitingly at him when he had arrived back from his shopping spree. ‘We don’t need you to buy clothes for us, Sean.’
‘Oliver is outgrowing virtually everything he has,’ Sean had replied quietly. ‘And, so far as I can tell, your own clothes—’
‘Are my own concern,’ Kate had snapped viciously.
Sean hadn’t made any further response, but Kate had seen the warning grimness of his mouth as he listened to her churlish outburst.
* * *
‘Okay, that’s the car packed.’
Kate forced a smile for Carol and her husband, Tom, who had come round to see them off. Her smile turned to an anxious frown as Oliver and George came rushing towards them, and Oliver missed a step and fell.
Tom was standing closest to him and automatically bent down to pick him up, smiling reassuringly at him as Oliver’s bottom lip thrust out and began to wobble.
‘I’ll take him!’
Kate’s head swivelled round in Sean’s direction when she heard the curtness in his voice, and she saw the immediate and determined way in which he went to take Oliver from the other man. When he held Oliver there was a look in his eyes that made Kate’s heart turn over. Sean had resented the fact that Tom had gone to Oliver’s rescue!
The scuffed knee and bruised pride attended to, Sean put Oliver down whilst he helped Kate to the car. She could walk a few yards now, but she had to admit that it was easier to lean on Sean than to insist on walking by herself. There was surely no real need, though, for Sean to fasten her seat belt for her?
In the enclosed space of the car she was acutely conscious of the scent of his skin, and of the way the dark bristles of his beard were already roughening his jaw. If she leaned forward only just a little she would be able to press her lips to his skin. Her heart turned over and she gazed at him whilst he was absorbed in his task of making her comfortable. The dark thick fans of his eyelashes cast shadows over his skin, making him look unfairly vulnerable. His concentration on his task reminded her poignantly of Oliver whenever he was engrossed in something.
A small sound bubbled in her throat and Sean turned to look at her. At her and into her. His gaze fastened on her eyes and then dropped with merciless swiftness to her mouth. Kate felt her lips parting as though he had willed them to do so. A small, fine shudder ran through her, and she knew exactly why Sean was no longer looking at her or through her, but at her breasts. She could feel the tight betraying stiffness of her nipples as they responded to her sudden arousal.
‘When are we going?’
Oliver’s impatient demand brought Kate swiftly back to reality.
‘We are going right now,’ Sean answered him, standing up and c
losing the passenger door.
* * *
Not even the comfort of Sean’s luxurious saloon could completely prevent her body from aching, and by the time they had been travelling for three hours all Kate wanted to do was to be able to lie down and go to sleep, but when Sean asked her if she was all right she nodded, refusing to admit how very uncomfortable and exhausted she felt.
‘I’m fine,’ she insisted doggedly, refusing to look at him even though she knew he had turned his head to look at her.
‘There’s bound to be a hotel somewhere round here,’ was Sean’s undeceived and clipped response. ‘We can stop there and you can rest.’
‘No,’ Kate protested. Hotels, like the new clothes Sean had bought for them, cost money—and she was determined that somehow she was going to repay him every penny he had spent on them.
She hadn’t realised that Sean’s house was going to be so far away, but her pride would not allow her to ask him exactly where it was or how long it would take them to get there.
Oliver, though, had no such inhibitions, and demanded, ‘Are we nearly there yet?’
‘Almost,’ Sean assured him, without turning his head, and Kate knew that he was smiling because she could hear the smile in his voice.
A wave of tiredness swamped her and she started to slip in her seat, unaware of the anxious look Sean was giving her.
‘Not much further now,’ she heard him saying quietly. ‘Just another couple of junctions on the motorway and then we’ll be turning off. We can stop then, and—’
‘I’ve already told you that I don’t want to stop,’ Kate burst out irritably. ‘I never even wanted to go to this wretched house of yours in the first place!’ she reminded him bitterly.
As she struggled to make herself comfortable she intercepted the wholly male look her son and his father were exchanging. Anger and anguish tore at her in equal measures—because these two males who shared one another’s blood had bonded against her. Her anguish grew to fear that she might not be able to prevent her son from ultimately being hurt by his father.