by Kandi Jaynes
Drake had left shortly after kissing her the night before. He had held her for a few minutes, then gave her a soft goodnight kiss, bid her sweet dreams and left. "Sweet dreams, yeah right," she mumbled from under her pillow. Deciding she needed to get up and find something to take her mind off the man, she rolled out of bed.
It was shortly after ten when Kate came dragging into the kitchen. "You sure have taken to sleeping late on the weekends," Missy said.
"Even as late as it is, she looks like she could use a few more hours sleep," Sue added. "You look terrible. Long night?" she asked with a grin.
"Are you okay?" Missy asked. "You do look a little stressed."
"I'm fine, I just need some tea."
"So how did things go after I left last night?" Sue asked.
Kate turned and looked at the other two at the table. "Either of you want any tea?"
"I'd like some," said Kelsie. Missy shook her head no.
Kate went about her business.
"Well?" Sue said. "Are you going to tell us what happened?"
Kate looked at Missy and then Kelsie as she set a cup of tea in front of her. "I'm hungry, you didn't happen to bring anything for breakfast, did you?"
"Muffins," Kelsie answered, "They're beside the refrigerator."
"That sounds great." Kate grabbed the bag and her tea on the way to the table.
"Well?" Sue demanded, louder this time.
Kate looked at Missy. "I'll warn you now I'm not speaking to her. That way you can decide if you want to stay or not. We all know how obnoxious she can be when she's ignored.
Sue let out an exasperated breath. "Oh, come on. I was just helping you out."
Kate looked at Kelsie. "These muffins are really good. Did you make them or get them from that new bakery in town?"
They discussed the muffins, the new bakery, two other new stores that had just opened, and a few other things. Missy finally broke in, and said, "We came over to see if you had any plans for today. Your birthday is next Saturday, and we've decided what we want to do."
For as long as they had been friends, birthdays had always been treated special between them. They didn't try to do it bigger and better every year, simply different than what had been done before. They had made a vow as teens no matter what the rest of their lives were like to never get stuck in a rut when it came to celebrating birthdays.
To help keep that from happening it was also the tradition the three who weren't having the birthday got to choose the activity. That kept it interesting.
Kate couldn't believe she had actually forgotten it was time for her birthday. She took a deep breath. "So what's it going to be this year?"
"Something you would never come up with on your own," Kelsie smiled.
Missy continued, "We are going to go shopping and buy new evening wear so next weekend we can all go to that fancy new restaurant in Fort Wayne."
Kate nearly choked on her tea. "Evening wear? I hope you're talking about flannel pajamas for a restaurant hosting a theme party."
Kelsie laughed. "Of course not. It won't hurt you to dress up once in your life."
"I have dressed up. I have a dress in my closet."
"Yes, but it's as old as your car and would probably crumble from dry rot if you tried to take it off the hanger."
Kate gaped at her. Kelsie rarely spoke to anyone like that. She was always the quiet one. Surprisingly, she was the one Kate usually went to when she had a serious problem. Most people had the impression she was closest to Sue. In reality, her and Sue had lots of fun together and were good friends, but their basic values varied drastically when it came to personal issues.
"It's our decision," said Missy, "This is what we've decided. We can shop tomorrow or later in the week if you have plans today, but we are going."
Kate sighed, resigning herself to the fact it was going to happen. "I don't have any plans so we might as well go get this over with." She stood up and took her cup to the sink. "I'll go get dressed."
Kate arrived home five hours later loaded down with packages. Tossing them all on her bed, she couldn't believe she had bought so many clothes today. It wasn't the money that bothered her, she could afford it. What amazed her was she had just bought more clothes in one trip than she would normally buy in a two year span. She didn't shop often. Her friends teased her about being a penny pincher sometimes, but it wasn't like that. She simply didn't need much. After her bills were paid and she pocketed some cash to put gas in her car and the vending machines at work, everything else went into the bank. She didn't have a vast amount left over each week but it had added up over the past few years.
Her job was not conducive to an expensive wardrobe considering she came home stained with oil and machine coolant most days. So why did many of these bags contain sweaters, blouses, and pants that were not standard denim? Not to mention that slinky little black thing the girls made her buy. She groaned and flopped down on the bed. If they thought she was wearing it, and that contraption that went under it, out in public they had another thing coming.
Kate couldn't help but grin thinking about what the guys at work would say if they saw her in a slinky black dress. They would probably never stop laughing at her. She started to wonder what Drake would think about it, but slammed that thought shut before it could fully form. She wouldn't find it funny if Drake thought she looked silly in it. "It's not like he'll ever get the chance to see you in it anyway," she said out loud.
She hopped off the bed and dug through the packages. Deciding it was silly to have bought so many clothes she probably would never wear. She picked out a few pieces she especially liked and bagged the rest to take back Monday.
The dress she would like to take back, but knew according to birthday law she would have to wear it Saturday night. She hung it in the closet, then opened the little bag that came with it. Slowly she pulled the black silk teddy out and looked at it. "What were you thinking?" She groaned as she slid her fingers down garter straps that were attached and wrinkled her nose. "Like I would even know how to get into something like this."
Running a hand across the silk she had to admit it felt nice but wasn't sure she would feel comfortable having it on. It just wasn't the kind of thing she ever wore. "It's not like they'll know if I have it on or not." The deal had been they all bought new sexy dresses and matching underclothes with garters and silk stockings. Sue had gone for an outrageous sheer lace bustier with matching garter all the same dark red as her dress. Missy had chosen a jade dress with matching bra, panty, and garter set. Kelsie like herself had gone simple and black. "Everybody needs a little black dress," she said, repeating what Kelsie had told her.
Kate finished putting away what she planned to keep and set the rest on a chair by the door as she headed for the kitchen checking the time. She and Kelsie were going to a movie later. Drake wouldn't be by. He had told her last night he was going to be busy all weekend. Kate was glad. She needed time to sort out what had happened to her last night.
Maybe she should talk to Kelsie about it. Discussing it with someone might help her see the situation more clearly. Possibly help her find a way to discourage Drake before he had a chance to hurt her too badly.
With that decided she pulled a soda out of the refrigerator. Going back to the bedroom she retrieved her sketchpad and pencils out of the closet and went to the living room. Drawing usually helped her relax. She would just have to make sure she drew something other than Drake's face. She flipped open the pad and looked through some of her drawings. When she got to Drake's picture, she stared at it. There was still something about it that bothered her, but she couldn't yet figure out what. She moved past it and found a blank page.
She was still drawing when Kelsie came in. While Kate found her shoes, Kelsie picked up the sketchpad and flipped through it. "I haven't seen you draw in years. What made you pick it back up?"
"I don't know. I was cleaning a while back and ran across that in a closet. I guess I decided to see if I was still cap
able. Once I started, I realized how much I missed it." Kate turned and saw the astonished look on Kelsie's face.
"Not only have you not lost your ability, I'd say you've gotten better. Or is it simply a particular subject matter that inspires you to this level of ability?" Kelsie turned the tablet around and Kate saw Drake's face.
"I, um, I'm not sure how that happened. It just sort of showed up on the paper."
"Wow. I knew you two were seeing quite a bit of each other, but I didn't realize it was this serious."
"It's just a sketch," Kate said. "It's not serious."
"My dear, nobody could mistake the way you feel about him after seeing this."
"What do you mean?" Kate asked defensively.
"I mean, look at it. This is not a simple sketch. I'm no art expert, but I can see the emotion in this. There's no way you could have put that look in his eyes unless you've seen it there, and no way you could have recreated it so accurately unless you felt it to some extent yourself. I know you, Kate. I've seen your other drawings. I know you need a model of some kind to do your best work. Unless Drake posed for this, you created it from memory. If that's the case, then you would have to feel pretty strongly about him to do this. The way you painstakingly detailed every feature of his face shows how much you care.
That's when Kate saw it. The thing she knew was there but couldn't quite grasp. Kelsie was right, her feelings were on that page. Her feelings for Drake. She hadn't wanted to see it. The drawing had been her way of expressing it without having to face reality.
Kate dropped her head in her hands and started to cry as she sank into a chair.
Kelsie came over and hugged her. "I knew this would happen someday. I only hoped you'd be ready for it when it did."
"Well, I'm not," she cried. "I can't believe I let this happen." She took a deep breath and wiped her eyes. "I'll just have to get over it. It'll take awhile, but I can do it."
"Why do you have to get over it? Drake is a really great guy."
Kate laughed, though not really amused. "Yes he is. That's just it, he's a Vice President. Obviously, he's looking for someone to fool around with until a proper wife can be found. I work in a machine shop, he can't really be serious about me. He's new in town, he just hasn't met anybody else here yet. In time he'll lose interest." Kate hoped Kelsie would accept that as the reason. The real reason she couldn't get involved was too humiliating.
"I haven't gotten that impression from him. Has he tried to pressure you into sleeping with him?"
"No."
"Then obviously he's interested in something more. He's a man who happens to have a title attached to his job. So what? I don't understand why you think he wouldn't be interested in you. He'd be lucky to have you, and I think he knows that. Why don't you give him a chance?"
"There are a lot of things I'm willing to chance, but walking into a relationship that's doomed from the beginning is not one of them." Kate wiped her eyes again and stood up. "If we don't leave soon, we'll miss our movie."
"We don't have to see a movie, if you'd rather, we can stay here," Kelsie offered.
"No, I need to get out for awhile. I've been feeling a bit claustrophobic lately."
*****
Even though it had gone fairly well for a Monday, Kate was glad work was over. She hadn't been getting much sleep lately. She had never been one to take naps unless she was sick, but recently found she wanted one often. She had to get a grip on this Drake thing. She hadn't seen him all weekend and should've been glad. Instead she had constantly wondered what he was doing. He told her he would be busy but he hadn't said at what.
That evening like clockwork Drake showed up at suppertime. "Hello. Are we eating in or out this evening?"
Kate glared at him, not moving away from the door. "Don't you have a home of your own?"
"Yes, I do, but I like it here better. Now, I'm guessing either you're not moving because you don't want to let me in, or your waiting for a hello kiss. I'm going to go with the latter." In one smooth motion he stepped to her, slid his hands around her waist, and lowered his head. Her breath caught in her throat as his lips touched hers. This kiss was different than the last one. It didn't begin slow and soft. It started out hard and passionate, leaving no room for rational thought.
By the time Drake lifted his head, Kate didn't think she could stand on her own. Her legs were shaky and she was out of breath. Her arms were wound tightly around his neck. Drake scooped her up and stepped inside kicking the door shut. He carried her into the living room and dropped down on the sofa with her on his lap. "Much better," he murmured as he kissed her again.
Kate couldn't believe what was happening to her. It's not like she had never been kissed before. Men she'd gone out with had kissed her. She usually enjoyed it. Found it quite nice at times in fact, but not one of them had ever affected her like this.
Her mind seemed to have no control over her body. His kiss was demanding. He took and demanded she give... and she did, willingly. What shocked her more, however, was what happened next. Drake started to release her and Kate tightened her grip on him, running a hand into his hair. Now she took and demanded he give... and he did, without reservation. She would have never thought herself capable of such things. It inflamed her even more to realize she had the same affect on him he had on her. As she kissed him, she felt his heart beat even faster against her hand, his breathing became heavier and he sighed with a moan of unrestrained desire.
This time she was the one to release him, slowly pulling her hand from his hair as she looked into those dark hooded eyes. "Drake, I...." She didn't know what to say.
"It's okay, sweetheart, you don't have to say anything." He ran a hand down her back. Tugging her forward as he kissed her neck. Drawing away, he whispered, "Oh, Kate. If kissing is like this between us, can you imagine what it's going to be like when we finally make lo..."
Kate's hand clamped over his mouth before he could finish, then scrambled off his lap and to the kitchen. When she heard him coming she ran down the hall to her bathroom. She looked at her reflection in the mirror as she tried to catch her breath. Her eyes were dark and her lips were red and swollen. Her cheeks carried a light flush. She quickly splashed cold water on her face and dabbed it with a towel. She knew she was being ridiculous and over reacting, but she couldn't help it. He had almost said the unthinkable out loud. She had dreamed about it happening many times, but rationalized that one couldn't help what the subconscious did during sleep. She had been careful not to let such thoughts enter her conscious mind. Looking at herself again, she realized he had said when not if. He seemed sure it was going to happen. Of course, she hadn't done anything recently to give him reason to believe the contrary.
Splashing her face one more time with cold water, she hoped to revive her ability to think rationally. Looking herself right in the eye she said, "You're a grown woman. Start acting like one and stop over reacting. People kiss all the time, it's no big deal." Kate decided it was probably some hormonal change her body was going through causing her to have such a strong physical reaction. After all, weren't women her age supposed to have physical needs? That had to be all it was. She hoped that was it at least, because she was running out of explanations and excuses.
After folding the towel and carefully placing it back on the rack, she smoothed down her clothes, squared her shoulders, and went to the kitchen. She pulled shaved ham and cheese slices out of the refrigerator. As she was getting the bread, Drake walked into the room.
"I'm going to have a sandwich, do you want one?" she asked, her voice devoid of emotion.
"Yes. That will satisfy one of my appetites."
Kate bit back a retort and continued making the sandwiches. Drake strolled over behind her and slid his hands around her waist. "How long are you going to pretend this isn't happening?" he asked, kissing the back of her neck. "You're going to have to acknowledge it sooner or later." He tightened his arms around her, pulling her tight against him.
Ka
te's hands started to tremble as she finished her task.
"I'm not going away, Kate. Not only am I not going away, but I'm also getting tired of feeling like I'm sneaking around. I'm not ashamed of my feelings for you, and I want people to know you're mine. I know that may sound archaic or chauvinistic, but it's how I feel." His voice carried a tinge of frustration. "Do you have any idea what it's like for me to see you with all those men everyday?" He sighed against her neck. "It's all I can do some days not to stand out there and chase them away from you. I want to tell each and every one of them you're mine and they can't have you." He let out a rough self-mocking laugh. "The only thing stopping me so far is the fact you're locked safely behind the fence and they can't get to you. I can't promise it will stop me much longer."
"First of all," Kate replied sternly. "I'm not with all those men, I simply work there and dealing with them is my job. I consider many of them friends, but that's all. Second," her voice started to falter. "I'm not yours, and we're not sneaking around. I'm staying home and you keep showing up, that's not sneaking around. If you don't like the way I do things you, don't have to keep coming over." Her whole body trembled now as she fought back tears.
"Yes, I do have to come over. Until I can convince you to see me other places I will continue to be here." He reached out and took the sandwiches. Kate followed him to the table. As they ate she watched him, trying to figure out why he was doing this to her. She couldn't possibly have anything he would want. He was terrific. He held a position few men his age had achieved. He was intelligent, gorgeous, she assumed reasonably wealthy, so what was he doing here? He could have his pick of women, why was he wasting time with the one nobody wanted?
She was considering asking him that question point blank when Sue walked in. Relief washed over her at not having to be alone with him anymore this evening and let the subject drop.
Chapter Eight
Wednesday after work, Kate walked behind Smitty on the way out the door, digging through her purse for her keys. Not noticing he'd stopped, she ran into him. "Smitty! What are you doing? I almost broke my nose." She looked around and saw many of the guys standing along the sidewalk and at the edge of the parking lot. She leaned sideways and peeked around Smitty. Drake stood propped against a brand new SUV. He looked directly at her and said, "You can drive mine if I can drive yours." Laughter rumbled all around her.