by Ava May
“Alexis… what’s going on?” he asked as she approached the door. She held the doorframe and looked at him.
“I… I can’t… I’m sorry,” she finally managed to say. Sean shook his head.
“Why are you sorry? What happened?” he asked.
“This was a mistake,” she said before she ran out. She could hear Sean calling out after her but she didn’t want to stop. She kept walking until she got to her room down the hall. She was breathing hard and there was a tear rolling down one cheek as she leaned against the closed door.
“What the hell did I do?” she wondered as she sunk to the floor. “How could I do that?”
Chapter 2
When Alexis woke up the next day, her heart was still beating hard. She had waited until Sean fell asleep the previous night to quietly slip into the master bedroom to check on him. She was as quiet as she possibly could as she checked up on him making sure she didn’t wake him up. She was trying to figure out how she was going to behave when she saw Sean as she dressed. She pulled on her scrubs and put on a pair of dangling earrings. She held her hair up in a low ponytail before she made her way out of her room.
“I will have to face him at some point,” she thought as she walked out. She suddenly felt her blood curl when she noticed Sean limping towards her. She had half a mind to go back into her room as she looked at him biting her lower lip. She wanted to speak but her throat was dry.
“You’re up already?” Sean asked when he saw her. She nodded.
“I was just about to come to your room…to help you with your bath,” she said and he shook his head.
“I already had my bath,” he said in a soft voice as he made his way towards her. “Right now, I just want to have breakfast.” She nodded. “With you,” he added.
“I think Marisol already made some food. I’ll set a plate up for you.” She began walking towards the stairs and Sean was doing his best to catch up with her.
“Did you hear me?” he asked as she got closer to him. “I said I want to have breakfast with you,” he said again. She wanted to answer him but she just couldn’t think of how she was going to turn him down without sounding like a bitch. She couldn’t just walk away because he was literally in her way.
“Sean, please,” she said as she looked at him. “Just let me do my job.”
“Baby,” Sean started as he made his way towards her.
“Don’t call me that,” Alexis said in a low voice.
“Why not?” he asked. She was trying to pull away from him but he did not want to let her go. She looked at him and sighed. “We made love last night and you left me alone while quite frankly, I would have rather woken up next to you.”
Alexis looked into his eyes and managed to pull away.
“We did not make love, Sean,” she said as she walked past him. “We fucked. That’s it.”
She began making her war downstairs leaving a stunned Sean behind.
“Wait, what?” he asked before he began walking after her. “Damn leg,” he muttered when he realized that even though he was walking as fast as he could, he still wasn’t fast enough to catch up with her. “Alex,” he called out again. He was now on the ground floor making his way towards the kitchen where true to her word, Marisol had already made them breakfast.
“There are some hash brown patties and hard boiled eggs,” Alexis announced as she put a plate on the table. “I gave you a side of baked beans and a glass of orange juice Hope that is okay with you.”
Sean was giving her a confused look and she knew all too well that he didn’t understand why she was acting as if nothing had happened. The truth was that she wanted to avoid talking about what had happened as much as she possibly could.
“Alex,” Sean said when he finally got to the table.
“Sit down. I’ll get your pills,” Alexis said before he could get a chance to say anything. She walked to his room as quickly as she could and got some of his pills in a pill crusher. As she made her way downstairs, she realized that she had done everything she was supposed to do. Since he had taken the initiative to give himself a bath, she didn’t have anything else to do until much later that afternoon when she had to check his stats. Her heart was pounding. She needed to get out of there. She rushed back to her room, pills in hand and changed out of her scrubs into a strapless maxi dress and a pair of sandals. She then grabbed her purse and slowly made her way back to the kitchen where Sean was seated at the table. He looked up at her as she placed the pill crusher on the table in front of him.
“Are you heading out or something?” he asked as he looked at her and she nodded. “Where?”
‘I don’t think you have to know every little detail of my life, Sean,” she pointed out a little more curtly than she had originally intended.
“Whoa, Alex. Where is this coming from?” he asked as he looked at her.
“I just think that it is better to maintain a professional relationship from now on,” she said. Sean looked up at her and held her wrist in his hand.
“Will you just sit down and talk to me so I know where this hostility is coming from?” he asked as he looked up at her. She took a long minute before she finally sat down. “Good. Now, will you tell me what is going on with you this morning?” he asked.
“Last night,” she started.
“Yes, what about last night?” he asked.
“Sean, last night was a mistake,” Alexis went on. She was trying hard not to give in to her emotion and let the tears she was fighting roll down her cheeks.
“No, you can’t say that. You cannot mean that, Alexis,” Sean said as he looked into her eyes.
“I mean it, Sean. I am your nurse and I have been here for three weeks and in those three weeks I have seen four different women come and go.”
“So what?” he asked.
“So, I don’t want to be one of those women you bang and forget,” she said. “I don’t want to be a groupie. That is not who my parents raised me to be.”
“And you are not,” he said as he looked at her.
“Well, I…” she pulled her hand away and stood up. “I need some time alone,” she said in a low tone.
“Alexis, please sit down.”
“Maybe I can organize another nurse for you from the…” she started before he shook his head.
“Don’t you dare,” he said. The tone in his voice was everything she needed to let her know that he was getting agitated. She looked at him and the tear she had fought back for so long finally rolled down her cheek.
“I have to go,” she said running out. She would have wanted to explain herself but there was no way of telling her employer that she had fallen for him long before she even started working there. That she knew that she was making the biggest mistake of her life just admitting that to herself?
Chapter 3
As Alexis sat across Tasha at the LA General hospital cafeteria, she was assured that the only thing worse than the coffee she was having was the look Tasha was giving her at that moment.
“I’m sorry, you what?” Tasha asked as she looked at Alexis who was looking at her. “I must be mistaken because it sounded like you said that you screwed Sean Elliot.”
“That’s exactly what I said and you need to keep it down, missy,” Alexis said looking around the almost empty cafeteria. Even though the cafeteria didn’t have much traffic, she could not help but want to keep everything quiet.
“It’s not like there’s anyone around,” Tasha pointed out as if she could read her mind.
“I know but I am going to be coming back here after Sean gets better and I really don’t want to be branded as the slutty nurse.” Tasha took a long deep breath and took a sip of her coffee.
“Okay. Let’s just go slow,” she started. “You and Sean? Together?” she asked and Alexis nodded. “And you are not happy about it?” she asked again.
“Not at all,” Alexis said. “I mean, I still have at least six weeks there and…”
“And what, Alex? So w
hat if it was just a fuck for him? Just move on,” Tasha said shrugging.
“I want to but I don’t think I can,” Alexis said. Tasha rolled her eyes and took another sip of her coffee. Sean was not just a guy she could bang and forget. “Not when I am still working with him.” Tasha raised an eyebrow over the other.
“Wait…Alex, are you falling for this guy or something?” she asked and Alexis shrugged.
“I don’t know, maybe,” she said. She did not want to admit it to her best friend but the truth was that she had fallen for Sean a long time before she noticed his lingering looks. That was the only way she could explain the pang of jealousy she felt when she saw all those women going into his room.
“When you say ‘maybe’, you usually mean yes,” Tasha said in a soft voice. Alexis ran her fingers through her hair.
“I don’t want to be into him. I think that is the issue here,” she said.
“And why is it an issue exactly?” Tasha asked. Alexis shrugged again. She had absolutely no way to put what she was feeling, what she was thinking in words.
“I think I will need a replacement,” she suddenly said making Tasha’s eyes grow wide.
“You cannot be serious,” she said.
“I don’t think I should stay at his place,” Alexis said shaking her head.
“Wait, is this about Daniel?” Tasha asked. Alexis never answered but her silence was all that Tasha needed to prove herself right. “Alex, Sean is not Daniel. Don’t make him pay for the mistakes of all the male assholes out there.”
Alexis opened her mouth to answer her but her pager suddenly went off. She looked at it and sighed.
“Damn it, trauma alert to all medical personnel,” she said before she looked up. “Listen sweetie, I have to go but try not to overthink this. Nothing is ever this serious.” She leaned forward and gave Alexis a quick hug before she ran out of the cafeteria. Alexis took a sip of her coffee and sighed. She could not help but think that maybe Tasha was right. Maybe she was overthinking things but at the back of her mind she knew that doing as her best friend had suggested was not as easy as she thought it out to be. Daniel Hayes had taken her heart and literally shattered it into a million pieces. She had been afraid to love ever since Daniel left her for a college sophomore. Somehow, she always felt too old, too heavy and too complicated for any man and now that Sean was showing some kind of interest, she couldn’t help but wonder what his angle was.
****
When Alexis finally went back to Sean’s place, it was almost one. She had taken a long leisurely drive after meeting Tasha before she finally decided to drive back. She had tried making a call to her supervisor so that he could organize for a replacement but she just could not do it. She knew that what she felt for him was a means to an end but she just couldn’t bring herself to leave. The house was unusually quiet when she walked in.
“Alexis?” she heard Sean calling out from the living room as she stuffed her keys into her purse.
“Yeah, it’s me,” she called out as she began walking towards the living room. Her heart was beating harder and faster with every step she took. “Hi,” she said in a soft voice when she got to the living room.
“Hi,” Sean said looking up at her. He was in the same white linen shirt and black khaki pants he was wearing when she left. “Feeling better?” he asked. She put her purse down and nodded.
“I just needed some fresh air,” she said.
“So no more talk about quitting?” he asked, one eyebrow over the other.
“I am still going to look for a replacement…” she started before Sean stood up.
“Damn it, Alex,” he said as he looked at her. He began walking towards her slowly, using his cane for support. “Why won’t you talk to me?” he asked when he got to where she was. She looked into her eyes and saw something different, something she had seen the previous night. His look was soft and gentle and the way he was talking to her, he could hear the pain in his voice. He was actually genuinely concerned.
“I want to talk to you,” she started.
“Then do it. Talk,” he pressed.
She bit her lower lip.
“I need you to just talk to Sean. Your friend. The sorry idiot whose bed pan you had to empty and not Sean Elliot, your employer,” Sean said in a soft voice. “Just talk to me.”
Alexis looked into his eyes for a long minute and the leaned against the wall.
“Last night,” she started. “Did you do it because you were horny and needed a fix or did you do it because you really wanted to be with me?” she asked. Sean began moving towards her but she held up a hand. “Don’t come any closer…just stay there,” she said as she took a step back. She did not want to be any closer to him than she had to.
“If you have to ask, then maybe I didn’t do a good job as I thought I did,” he said with a smile.
“I’m serious Sean,” she said in a soft voice.
“I wanted you Alexis. I wanted you then and I want you now,” he said.
“Why?” she asked. She could tell by the way he was looking at her that she had taken him by surprise with her question.
“Because I have been having a beautiful sexy woman in my house every single day for the last few weeks and she is driving me nuts,” he said, “And the most terrible thing is she doesn’t even realize it,” he added.
“And you are not just saying that to make me feel better?” she asked. Sean forced out a laugh and rubbed the back of his neck using his free hand.
“Why do you think so little of yourself that you don’t even appreciate the fact that I have just admitted that I am falling for you?” he suddenly asked.
“Because…” she started as he began moving closer to her. “Because I have seen you with other women before…I mean, during my first week here I saw four different women come over and you only turned them a way because you were in so much pain.”
“So I have a past,” he said. “We all have one.”
“You have a very public past,” she pointed out. “You and I are worlds apart, Sean. Whatever this is can never work.”
“It will if we really want it to,” Sean pointed out. He moved closer to Alexis and noticed her glossy eyes. “Baby, what’s going on?” he asked as she blinked back a tear.
“I cannot get hurt again, Sean. I just can’t handle it,” she said in a soft voice. By this time, Sean was standing right in front of her. “People like you never end up with people like me.”
“What do you mean people like me? What is so different between you and me?” he asked. A tear rolled down one of her cheeks.
“I have lived my life knowing that I am no Kardashian, Sean. The life you live is one that I only wish I could have and to make matters worse, I am just a lowly nurse and…” she never got to finish her sentence. He had leaned forward and claimed her lips in a long low kiss. She looked at him when he pulled away.
“You are beautiful,” he said in a soft voice.
“But I…” she started saying again before he pressed his index finger to her lips.
“I am with you because I want to be,” he said in a low voice.
“But the women you like…they are so…sexy,” she said. “Perfect size zeroes and everything.”
“I like my women a little curvier,” he said as his eyes went up and down her body. “I like my women exactly like you, Alexis Ballard.”
He took a step forward and balancing his weight on his cane, he slipped an arm around her waist and pulled her close to him. She could feel every muscle outlined under the linen shirt he had on.
“You are my kind of woman, Alexis,” he said in a whisper. She felt her cheeks flush crimson as he looked at her, slowly bringing his head down. “You are the only woman for me,” he whispered again as his lips brushed against her own. He pulled away from her and used his thumb to gently brush her tears away. “I will never hurt you, Alex,” he said as he looked at her. She looked into his green eyes and he began pulling the chords that held her dress up, undoin
g them as he went on. She gasped when she felt the soft fabric of the dress sliding down her body as it fell around her ankles like a bed of petals. He looked at her standing in front of him in nothing but her panties and matching strapless bra.
“The door,” she whispered.
“I already sent Marisol home for the day,” Sean said as he looked at her. He took her hand and led her to the couch nearby. He dropped his cane and held her closely as he kissed her. He was ran a hand down her back to her waist before he pulled away. He pushed her panties down and looked into her eyes. She wriggled out of her panties as he undid the clasp of her bra with one hand. He sat down and looked at her naked body. A smile played on his lips and she noticed the bulge in his pants getting larger. He was obviously enjoying what he was looking at. “I want to taste you,” he said in a soft voice. She looked at him and shrugged.
“Your leg,” she said as she looked at his right leg still in a brace.
“Get up here,” he said in a commanding tone. Alexis looked at him surprised. “Don’t make me wait,” he said looking at her. Alexis felt awkward as she climbed on the couch, her leg on either side of his legs. She lowered her crotch to his face and he began kissing her pussy in the very same way he would have kissed her mouth. She was moaning softly and shaking as he kissed and licked and sucked. She was having a hard time not giving in to her primal instinct and just grind herself on his face because he was making her feel things she had never thought possible.
“Oh…shit….Sean!” she moaned as he flicked his tongue on her already distended clitoris. He had his hands secured on her ass, holding her steady as he worshipped her sopping cunt. She wanted to pull away but the way he held her made it almost impossible for her to do so even in the awkward position she was in. The more he licked and sucked her, the closer she got to her climax. And he knew it too. The way she was shaking was not just because she was in an awkward position.
“Slow down…please…” she begged as he went on. By this time, he seemed to be going harder and faster. “I’m going to cum!” she announced but he wouldn’t slow down. She suddenly cried out as she felt herself emptying into his waiting mouth. She loved the way he never slowed down as she exploded into his mouth. She pulled away from him and lowered herself on the seat. She had just straddled him when he slipped an arm around his neck pulling her down to kiss her. She moaned when she tasted herself on his lips and his tongue.