by Sara Orwig
“Thanks for everything today. You were the knight to the rescue, burning car and all.”
“I’m glad I was. Today’s Sunday, so my cook, Millie, who usually watches Scotty when my nanny is away, is off. But because of the earlier sleet and the fresh snow coming down, the guys will need help first thing. We’ll have to get feed to the cattle, break ice for the livestock. Thing is, when the sun comes up, so does Scotty.”
“If he doesn’t mind being with me when he barely knows me, I can take care of Scotty and his breakfast. You go do what you have to do. I get up early and I can fix my own breakfast and his,” she said, looking at Mike’s dark eyes that were fringed with thick, curly black lashes. “I hope I didn’t make you miss your workout tonight,” she said.
“No. I worked out yesterday morning and it doesn’t hurt if I miss sometimes. There’s a track if you run. Just head in the opposite direction—the gym is at the other end of this hall in the opposite wing and downstairs.”
“I won’t be working out. Maybe later tomorrow, I’ll walk around the track—how many times around for a mile?”
“Eight.” Taking a step closer, he placed his hand beyond her on the jamb of the door and leaned toward her. “We’re together this weekend and then we’ll say goodbye and never see each other. Neither of us are at the point of complicating our lives, but I have to admit that I want to kiss you. Believe me, I haven’t felt that way about any woman since I lost Elise.” He leaned slightly closer and his voice dropped to almost a whisper. “We’re not going to fall into complications from one harmless kiss.”
“Why do I have the feeling that your kiss, even one, will not be—harmless?” she whispered, finding it difficult to get her breath. In the silence her heart drummed.
For a moment they gazed into each other’s eyes and she felt immobilized by his dark gaze.
“Savannah, we’re going to kiss. It might as well be now,” he whispered, slipping his arm around her waist and drawing her the last few inches to him.
She placed her hands on his chest, ready to voice her protest when his lips brushed hers lightly and her heart thudded.
At that moment she wanted his kiss with all her being. She couldn’t think about what was best or if she shouldn’t or that he really didn’t want this, either. It was impossible to walk away. Closing her eyes, she leaned into him and his arm tightened, his mouth coming down on hers as he kissed her hungrily in a driving force that took her breath.
His kiss drove away worries. Longing transformed the moment and she would never again view Mike in the same disinterested way.
Standing in his embrace, she kissed him back passionately, for the moment wanting his kiss, wanting to feel desired. She sought release from the tensions of the night as much as from the hurts of her past. Hoping to stir Mike out of his daily life of grief even if it happened only for seconds, she lost herself in kissing him. An intense need consumed her to an extent that shocked her.
The stubble on his jaw scraped her skin slightly while his warmth and strength, his lean, hard body heightened her pleasure. She wanted this. His kiss rocked her, stirring dormant responses. Time ceased and she had no idea how long they kissed, but it wasn’t long enough.
Finally, as she paused, he released her slightly.
“I guess we sort of lost it there,” she whispered. Both of them were breathing hard while she stepped away from him. “We can get back where we were.”
“Savannah,” Mike said, in a husky tone of voice and she turned to look at him. He hadn’t moved. He had one hand on his hip as he studied her. “We’ll never get back where we were.”
Startled, she blinked and her heart thumped faster. “We have to,” she said. “There’s no place in my life for you and there’s no place in your life for me.”
“A kiss isn’t a binding commitment,” he said, more as if to remind himself than inform her. “It was only kisses, Savannah. Warm kisses on a cold winter’s night—even beats hot chocolate.”
She suspected he attempted to make light of the moment, but that was impossible. He had a slight frown and she had complicated her stay at his ranch. They both had kissed away wise decisions.
“Savannah, we won’t fall in love—I promise you.”
“You can’t promise any such thing. No one can,” she said, realizing he had his heart locked away from any deep emotional involvement. “We’ve each had heartbreak and are vulnerable. I don’t need to make another emotional mistake on top of the huge one I’ve already made,” she said, feeling she should beware and guard her own heart because Mike was clearly warning her he would not fall in love.
He shook his head. “You won’t have even a tiny wrench to your heart because of one meaningless kiss. I’m not ready for anything serious and neither are you. We’re strangers who’ll be together only a day or two and never see each other again. Chalk it up to a stormy winter night and two vulnerable people. It was just a kiss that helped each of us on a cold winter’s night.”
Relieved that the moment was getting less intense, she shook her head. “What a line, Mike.”
Something flickered in his dark eyes and he shrugged. “Sounded good to me,” he said, continuing to make light of the situation.
“Well, maybe it put things in the proper perspective.”
“I think you did that,” he said.
“Let’s forget that kiss. Good night, Mike. See you in the morning and I’ll take care of Scotty if you’re out,” she said, shaking her head.
She stepped into her suite and closed the door, letting out her breath while she thought about his kiss. For just a few minutes Mike had made her forget her engagement, Kirk, everything else. Mike had made light of their kiss, but he had shaken her. His kiss had been sexy, spectacular, totally consuming.
She didn’t want any other complication in her life right now. She definitely didn’t trust herself to want to get to know any man better at this time. She had made a colossal mistake in judgment with Kirk, a man she had known when they were kids and yet she hadn’t really learned what she should have about him. She couldn’t know anything about Mike Calhoun, a man she had known hours when she had misjudged a man she had known well for years.
He certainly didn’t know the most important thing about her.
Frowning, she thought of what lay ahead. She placed her hand on her stomach and focused on the baby that she carried.
Three
As Mike walked down the hall to his suite, he raked his fingers through his hair. Savannah had defused the moment, eased them both away from memories that hurt and put their kiss in a better perspective. Even though it was meaningless to both of them, he shouldn’t have kissed her. Her kiss had stunned him, but it had been a long, long time since he had kissed a woman other than Elise—or wanted to. Nearly two years. It was natural for Savannah’s kiss to rock him. Along with their kiss came guilt, a feeling of betrayal of Elise’s memory and most of all, horrendous longing for Elise, the love of his life.
He walked into Scotty’s room and looked at his sleeping son who was curled on his side with his knees drawn up. Dark curls framed his face. Mike’s love for Scotty overwhelmed him. He ran his knuckles lightly along Scotty’s cheek, feeling his soft, smooth skin while love for his son held him by Scotty’s bed. He wished Elise could be with him to look at Scotty. “Your baby is beautiful,” he whispered to the empty room, thinking of her. “Elise,” he said, missing her, wishing she could see her son, wanting her with him and wishing he hadn’t kissed Savannah, yet their kiss hadn’t carried any significance. He loved Elise and Scotty with all his heart and always would. Tears stung Mike’s eyes and he blinked them away, drawing a little blanket up over Scotty’s shoulder.
“I love you, Scotty,” he whispered.
He left the room, leaving the door between their bedrooms open. Ten minutes later Mike returned with a blanke
t and stretched out on the brown leather sofa to sleep near his son.
He thought again of Savannah. In spite of a twinge of guilt, he’d had fun just being with her tonight—something that hadn’t happened in a long, empty time.
* * *
Sunshine spilled into the bedroom through sliding glass doors that opened onto a balcony. Savannah stepped out of bed, surprised she had slept until the sun was up. She showered, pulled on jeans and a red shirt, slipping her feet into loafers. She hurried down the hall. Half a dozen mornings lately, she had had morning sickness and she prayed she didn’t this morning. At the moment she was hungry, but in minutes she caught the first whiff of coffee and her stomach tightened. Surprised when she heard voices from the kitchen, she debated going to her room and waiting until Mike and Scotty were out of there, but she suspected they would come find her eventually. With a deep breath, she entered the kitchen.
Mike sat at the table across from Scotty, who was in a high chair that was pulled up to the table. Mike came to his feet as soon as he saw her.
“Good morning,” he said, smiling at her.
Tingles increased her awareness of him. How handsome he looked in jeans, a navy Western shirt with rolled back sleeves and his cowboy boots. His thick, black curls were as tangled as they had been last night and he looked appealing, handsome.
“Please sit,” she said, smiling at him. “Hi, Scotty. How are you on this beautiful morning?”
“I’m hungry,” he answered, smiling at her in return and she laughed.
She turned to Mike. “I thought you had some chores this morning and were going to be gone.”
“I’ve already been out. Scotty was still asleep. I’m going back to join them again after breakfast if you meant what you said about watching Scotty.”
“Sure I did if that’s all right with Scotty.”
“Scotty?” Mike prompted. “You’ll stay with Miss Savannah, won’t you?”
“Yes, sir,” Scotty said and smiled at Savannah again.
“That’s nice, Scotty. Did you see the snow this morning?”
“Yes, ma’am,” he answered politely. “This afternoon Daddy will help me make a snowman if I eat my breakfast.”
“A little bribe,” Mike said, grinning. “And it’ll be after I get some more chores done,” he added to Scotty who nodded. Mike turned to Savannah. “What can I fix you? We have bacon, eggs, orange and/or tomato juice, coffee, hot biscuits, dry cereal, blueberries, oranges, dried apricots—”
“Stop,” she said, laughing. “You’re naming way too many things. I just want cereal and a glass of milk. I can get my breakfast. You stay with Scotty.”
Mike reached the cabinets when she did and he retrieved a glass, turning to get the milk and pour it for her. “Tell me when.”
“When,” she said. “Not too much. Thanks.” She was so aware of Mike beside her, of his dark eyes intently on her. The sight of him made her remember last night, standing in his arms while they kissed.
In minutes she had cereal and a glass of milk as she sat beside Scotty and across from Mike.
“Please go on with your regular routine today and don’t let me change it,” she said.
“Will you help us build a snowman later?” Scotty asked.
“Sure, I will,” she said. “A snowman sounds like fun.”
Mike had a covered bowl on the table and when he raised the lid, she saw scrambled eggs.
“If those aren’t still hot, tell me. I’ll scramble some more,” he said.
She shook her head. “No, thank you. What I have is plenty.” She sipped her milk. “Do you know if it kept snowing into the night?”
“Oh, yes,” Mike replied. “The boys keep up with it and Ray said we had a record-setting eight inches.”
“Oh, Mike. I’m sorry—I’m sort of the houseguest who came for a night and stayed for a week. Eight inches—I won’t be able to get my car out of that and I doubt if the state road will be cleared.”
“You’re right on all counts. We’re glad to have you, so just relax, Savannah. This is a break in routine winter days.”
“Thanks,” she said, drinking some milk and eating cereal. After a few bites, her stomach lurched and worry gripped her. She didn’t want to be sick in front of Mike. She turned to talk to Scotty.
“I have a scarf you can use to put around your snowman’s neck,” she said, trying to ignore her queasy stomach.
“Savannah, are you all right?” Mike asked, studying her.
Feeling worse by the second, she shook her head. “Where’s the nearest bathroom?”
He stood and came around the table swiftly, taking her arm as she stood. “We’ll be right back, Scotty,” Mike said, leading Savannah away from the table. Mike headed to the hall and opened a bathroom door.
“Thanks.” As soon as the door closed, she lost the small breakfast she had eaten. She washed her face and hands with cold water and waited while her stomach settled slightly. When she opened the door, Mike leaned against the wall with his arms folded. Studying her, he straightened.
“Better now?”
“Yes, I am.”
“Do you need a doctor?”
“No, I’ve been to one. Don’t worry, this isn’t contagious.”
“I didn’t think it was,” he said quietly.
“You better get back to Scotty. He’s in a high chair.”
“He gets himself into that chair a dozen times a day and he gets himself down. Scotty is a climber so there’s no worry. He’s an easy kid to have around, and he’s an only child and that makes it easier. C’mon. You probably want to sit.”
“Yes, I do.”
They went to the family area where Scotty sat on the floor playing a game on a laptop.
“Mike, are you sure Scotty isn’t a bit older than you told me? He’s on a computer.”
“He has some games he likes and I’ve taught him how to pull them up. He catches on fast.” He studied her again. “Can I get you anything?”
“No, thanks. I’m feeling better now. I’ll get my dishes in a while.”
“Forget them. When’s your baby due or would you rather not talk about it?”
Startled, she focused on him. “I didn’t think my pregnancy showed yet.”
“It doesn’t. Elise had morning sickness. I recognize the symptoms.”
“I’m surprised you were able to tell by just one morning with me. I’m glad I found you yesterday—you were a lifesaver, but being saved by a mind reader is a little disconcerting.”
“I’m no mind reader, just observant. I assume your pregnancy is the reason you wanted to get out of Little Rock and go to California.”
“You’re right. You might not be a mind reader, but you’re definitely astute,” she said. His calm acceptance of discovering his guest was pregnant put her more at ease. If he had been shocked, worried about a pregnant woman on his hands or worse—acted disgusted the way her ex-fiancé had, she would have been embarrassed and upset. Also, his enthusiasm over his son helped put her at ease because it was obvious he liked kids and was filled with love for his son. She still hurt when she thought of the last conversation with Kirk and how he had stared at her, his gaze raking sharply over her after she had announced her pregnancy.
Get rid of it, Kirk had said. His first words to her had stabbed as if he had plunged a knife into her heart. His words had hurt, but the blunt dismissal had made her protective of her baby from that moment on. She brought her attention back to Mike.
“Your ex-fiancé didn’t want babies—what did you tell me—for another fifteen years? Or he really doesn’t ever want children?”
“He said he doesn’t want children for at least another fifteen years. I’m twenty-six and I don’t want to have my first child when I’m fifteen to twenty years older. I really don�
��t think he ever wants kids, but he wouldn’t say that. He didn’t want this baby at all. He didn’t care what I did as long as I didn’t keep the child.”
“That’s a hell of a thing,” Mike said, a note of steel in his voice that made her feel better. “Scotty is my whole world. I love him with every ounce of my being,” he said, looking at his son and a tender note coming into his voice that gave a twist to her heart.
“That’s wonderful for both of you. And the way I’d hoped it would be.”
“Sorry, but it’s good you found out now before you said vows. He gave up his baby and let you walk away—that’s the mistake of his life.”
“He didn’t view it that way. When he found out I was pregnant, I think he wanted to be rid of me. He signed over all parental rights, too. He wouldn’t have given any financial support anyway, but I didn’t want any from him.”
“I’d say you’re a hell of a lot better off without this jerk.”
“I feel as if I am. I don’t miss him—or if I do, I just think of the hurtful things he said to me about the baby and that changes any feelings I have for him.”
“That’s tough. So when’s your baby due?”
“I’m into my second month. I’ve been given an October date. We’ll see. What shakes me is my poor judgment about a man I had such a close relationship with and planned to spend my life with. I’ve known him since we were about eight or nine. I misjudged him in the worst way and that’s frightening.”
“Looks to me like you’ve learned from the experience.”
“It shakes my faith in myself. I don’t trust myself to fall in love again.”
“I imagine next time you’ll get to know the guy better in ways you didn’t the first time.” Mike stood. “Now I’m going to put the dishes into the dishwasher. You sit tight and don’t do anything. Then I need to get back to help the guys. When I return, Scotty,” he said, looking at his son who waited expectantly, “we’ll go build a snowman.”
Scotty grinned and returned to his computer game.