“Stay back.” Tyler practically screamed the order as he reached for Makena’s arm. He pulled, trying to drag her closer.
She shoved away from him. Jeff trapped her in place, leaving her vulnerable to Tyler’s whims. The gun in Tyler’s hand waved and bobbled. He pointed it in every direction, as if he’d forgotten he even held it.
The man was the ultimate wild card, out of control and raging. He started yelling about his life and all he’d lost. When he spied Shane, his intensity seemed to find a focus.
Perfect. That was exactly what Shane wanted. He made himself a target on purpose and planned to keep his body there for as long as possible. Let Connor and Cam get into position. Let Tyler make a mistake. Anything to take the attention away from Makena and give them all a chance at survival.
But Shane couldn’t look at her for long. Her eyes were wild with fear as her mouth dropped open. The combined look of pain and fear killed him. So did the way she glanced around and silently begged Cam to do something when Shane didn’t.
But he could. Rather than wait on the defensive, he grabbed a hold of the offensive. Shane held his hands up. “That’s right. You want me.”
Tyler scrambled to his knees. “You ruined everything.”
Shane took a step back, luring Tyler away from the protection of the barricade of the tipped table and pile of fallen chairs. “I did. I went after her when I knew she was yours.”
Makena gasped. “Shane, no.”
For a second he worried she believed him, but the concern on her face suggested something else. She was smart and strong. She’d know this amounted to a plot meant to ensnare Tyler and drag him down.
When Tyler’s gaze slipped back to her, Shane rushed to get it moving again. “I did it on purpose. I didn’t want her, but I really didn’t want you to have her.” He shook his head and pretended to believe the foul words he spit out. “She was a game. I wanted to beat you.”
Tyler lifted up a little higher. An inch more and his head would pop up in firing range. “She wanted me first.”
Shane didn’t even steal a look at her this time. To get through this, he needed to match Tyler’s evil with some of his own. The anxiety pinging around inside him threatened to drop him to his knees, but he kept his attention steady. On Tyler and his gun, waiting for the perfect moment to take him out.
“She did want you. She was all in and talking about you. Thinking you were this hero doing all this amazing work.” Shane forced the words out. “But I made her want me. Convincing her was tough, but I did it.”
Tyler straightened then and Shane did not hesitate. He lowered his hand with exacting speed and fired. Gunshots rang out from three parts of the room and he knew Connor and Cam had taken the advantage, too.
But Shane didn’t care about Tyler. Connor could handle him. Shane’s mind went to the woman who held his heart. Ignoring the aches and pain and the way his bones creaked after all the abuse they’d endured, he slid across the floor and skidded to a stop beside her. He was vaguely aware of Connor dropping down to check Tyler’s pulse and Cam rushing over to lift Jeff.
Shane only saw her.
He grabbed at the ropes binding her to the chair, trying to rip them apart with his bare hands. His strength alone might have done it, but Cam handed over a knife and Shane got busy cutting.
He had her loose in a few seconds and she flew into his arms. Her warmth seeped into him as he fell back against the floor on his butt. He had her cradled on his lap and he rocked back and forth. “I love you. God, I love you.”
He could hear her crying and felt the wet tears against his neck. Sirens whirred to life around them, and car doors slammed shut just outside. Guns came up and people talked over each other. Jeff didn’t move while Cam clamped a kitchen towel against his side and tried to talk with him.
Police burst through the door and Connor stopped them. He held up his hands and the yelling match started. All the noise faded into the background for Shane. He couldn’t help them and didn’t want to let go of her. In this moment he needed her. To hold her, to beg her forgiveness. Everything.
“I’m so sorry.” He whispered the words over and over, into her hair, then against her forehead. He kissed the patches of skin he could see and brushed her hair out of the way to get to her mouth. He was about to ask her something when her mouth touched his.
She kissed him, deep and desperate. Her fingers clawed at his back and she drew him in closer. “I thought you were dead.”
He had to lean down to hear her. “Are you hurt?”
She shook her head but didn’t answer. For some reason he needed to hear her voice. “Baby, talk to me.”
She looked up at him with tearstained cheeks. “It’s Jeff’s blood.”
The reminder had Shane glancing over his shoulder. The man’s eyes were open but glazed over.
“He saved me.” A tremble made her voice vibrate.
“I saw.” Shane had watched in shock as Jeff played the hero. He’d spent so much of his life lying about being one. In this instance, he’d acted like one, and Shane was humbled by the sacrifice.
“Is he—”
“Cam is working on him.” An ambulance crew rushed in a second later.
The small room burst to life. First responders roamed around and Connor acted as traffic guard, moving people here and there. Being in control and running the room. Business as usual.
Makena grabbed a handful of Shane’s shirt and brought his head back down to hers. “Get me out of here.”
He could do that. He owed her that much. More, actually. Because of him she’d played the role of decoy. He’d put her in direct danger and then almost stepped in too late to save her. It was every nightmare brought to life. He’d stayed away to keep the ugliness of his work out of her life but ended up doing the exact opposite.
“I’m sorry.” He said it because he had to. No other words would come out without a push.
Her hand trailed down his cheek. “You’re my hero.”
“I’m not, but you’re alive and that’s all that matters.”
He stood up and lifted her into his arms. He knew she needed to see a doctor and get checked out. That would all happen, but he needed to hold her for a few seconds first.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered into his neck, “I love you.”
The guilt trapped inside him escaped. “You shouldn’t.”
He’d never meant the words more in his life.
* * *
IF ANYONE HAD told Makena she’d be sitting at the hospital bedside of Jeff Horvath one day, she would have laughed. Maybe not even that. The idea was so ridiculous it didn’t even sound like a joke.
She’d taken the position that Jeff had gotten what he deserved. Somewhere she’d forgotten that he was a human being and had tossed his feelings aside. He deserved most of what had happened to him, but his actions at Tyler’s house showed that he could be redeemed. That there could be decency inside someone like him. Once guilt stopped punching her, she’d appreciate the lesson.
Until then, here she was, watching the machinery work to keep him alive and get stronger. The room filled with beeps and strange sounds. Something clicked and an automatic blood-pressure monitor spun to life and checked him every few minutes. He had oxygen and tubes connected to him.
He hadn’t opened his eyes, but the doctor said he’d survived the worst and was improving. She had no idea how anyone could tell.
She leaned back and continued to stare, willing him to get better and hoping he had the strength to do so. She did it for him and for her. Concentrating on Jeff helped her to forget Shane’s last words to her.
You shouldn’t.
After everything, all the pain and death, the terror and anxiety, he held on to his lone-wolf stance. In her horror-induced stupor, she’d thought she heard him utter the words she longed to hear. She’d told him she loved him, but he’d said it first...or had he? Those moments blurred together in her mind with Tyler’s manic tone and Jef
f’s death rattle as the knife slipped inside him. Thinking about it had her eyes popping open.
“How is he?” Connor asked as he stepped into the room with Shane behind him.
“Better.” But she barely heard the question.
Her gaze traveled over Shane. He had a bandage on his arm and neck, and one arm hugged his ribs. Connor had insisted they all take a trip to the hospital. She’d long ago been released. Shane had had to stay overnight and had slept through it all as she switched back and forth from his bedside to Jeff’s.
Shane frowned. “That’s a miracle.”
It all was. Makena couldn’t believe any of it. If she tried to explain it—and she had during a telephone call with Holt, who was ripping apart airports on his flights across the country to get to her—it all sounded so fantastical and unrealistic.
So did Jeff’s sacrifice. “How could a guy who would lie about who he was step up like that when to do so risked his own life?”
Nothing about what Jeff had done and the choice he’d made fit with the other things she knew about him. He’d spent so much time pretending to be a hero when he had had the instinct for decency inside him all along.
Connor crossed his arms in front of him. “I like to think a lot of people would do the right thing if confronted with the opportunity.”
Shane scoffed as he came over to stand beside her chair. “I think Connor is naive.”
She kind of agreed. “I owe him.”
“Connor repaid him.” Shane’s hand fell to her shoulder and squeezed.
The touch warmed all the chilled places inside her. She wanted to grab on to his hand and not let go. But now wasn’t the time or the place.
Her gaze switched from Shane to Connor. “What did you do?”
“There will be a feature in the news about Jeff, touching a bit on his past for perspective but talking about how he turned his life around and saved you and other people during a wild shootout in a house.”
“Connor left out the parts about Jeff stalking you,” Shane added.
Connor shrugged. “It didn’t fit with the rest of the story.”
She gave in and touched her fingers to Shane’s. “I’m sort of happy he did stalk me that last time.”
He glanced down at her and winked. “Me, too.”
With one last look at Jeff, Connor headed for the door. “I’m going to leave you two—”
“No.” Shane snapped out the answer before Connor took his next step. Before she could agree.
She dropped her hand to her lap. “No?”
“I need to head out.” Shane didn’t make eye contact as he spoke. He glanced around as he moved away from her.
After spending so much of his life putting an emotional wall between them, this time he added a physical one. He was running away from her in every way she could imagine, both physically and emotionally. Even Connor stared at him with narrowed eyes as if trying to read his mood.
“Fine.” That was all she could muster.
Shane hesitated as he watched her. “I’ll call you.”
Yeah, she wouldn’t sit by the phone and wait for that call. In fact, she was done waiting for Shane at all. If he couldn’t see that he could abandon his past and his fears, and be happy with her, she’d give up. They’d been in this highly stressful situation and managed to survive not by staying away from each other but by finally being together.
That left only one thing for her to say. “Goodbye, Shane.”
And this time she meant it.
Chapter Twenty
The next day Shane waited outside the hospital for Makena to come out. He stood in the parking lot, leaning against her car. She’d been keeping vigil by Jeff’s bedside since the ambulance crew brought him in. She’d called the Corcoran headquarters to let them know Jeff was going to be okay. She’d talked about going to Holt’s house to wait for him to get in after a series of canceled flights delayed him.
Shane wanted to see her before Holt did. Wanted to see her...period.
Footsteps sounded beside him, but Shane didn’t flinch. He’d seen Connor park nearby and head for him. He’d likely come over to give Makena a break at Jeff’s bedside. A decent thing to do. Shane had never thought of it. He’d left her yesterday and stayed away because there was something he needed to do before he talked with her.
Connor took up position beside Shane and stared at the front door of the hospital. “If Holt were here, he’d tell you to stop moping and go get your woman.”
Shane turned slightly to face his boss. “What?”
“This, the doubt and guilt.” Connor held out a hand in front of Shane. “I get it. Believe me. I almost lost Jana because I was so worried about losing Jana.”
Shane had listened to many lectures from Connor during their time at Corcoran. The guy liked to talk and wanted things to be done his way. Shane appreciated the way Connor ran the business and the team. He had no complaints. Except for these talks that didn’t make a lot of sense in or out of context.
“Clue me in on what you’re talking about.” His mind kept zipping back to Makena and all the things he needed to say to her. Talking with Connor just wasn’t a priority, no matter how much Shane liked the guy.
Connor sighed. “Man, you’re stubborn.”
He’d been hearing that his whole life. Since Shane agreed, he didn’t bother to deny it. “That’s not news.”
“I know you’re invested in the whole bachelor thing.”
Was. Before Makena. Before being with her and realizing he didn’t want to be without her. “I am?”
“You’re not?” Connor wasn’t one to miss a clue. He didn’t this time, either. “Are you saying—”
“I love her.” The words that had once stuck in his throat now freed him. Shane said them and his whole world shifted into position. The failed marriage was behind him. Makena was his future.
Connor laughed. “I know.”
“You could have told me.” But Shane knew that wasn’t fair. Each of the team members had talked about the difference between life on his own and life with a woman who meant everything. They’d tried to sell him on getting involved again and taking the risk. He’d blocked the comments and ignored every word.
“You weren’t ready to hear it.” Ever the undercover agent, Connor scanned the parking lot. Watching people as they moved in and out. “So, what was the thing with leaving the hospital room yesterday? You have to know that hurt her.”
He hadn’t, really. Not until after, when Cam had texted to call him an idiot.
But Shane hadn’t been playing games or thinking over his options. He knew he loved her and wanted to be with her, no matter the consequences. But he did have responsibilities and tried to meet them. “I needed to talk with Holt. I owed him that and wanted to go to Makena with a clear head and no barriers between us.”
Connor smiled. “What if Holt had told you to back off?”
It would have ripped him apart, but Shane’s answer didn’t change. “I would have ignored him.”
“Yep, that’s love.” Connor pushed off from the car and stood up straight. “Okay, good luck.”
That sounded ominous. “Luck?”
“It’s cute that you don’t think you’ll need it.” Connor shook his head as he waved and kept walking. “I almost feel bad for you.”
* * *
MAKENA’S BODY BEGGED for sleep. She was ten seconds away from dropping. She’d dozed on and off in that chair. Talked with the team members and her brother. Checked in and managed to get two of Jeff’s relatives to stop by.
Helping that guy could be a full-time job, but she didn’t plan to let it get away from her like that. She’d been there for him, providing support. He was recovering well and other people he knew, some from whom he’d been estranged for years, were taking over. Now she could rest.
If only she could close her eyes without seeing Shane’s face swim in front of her. As she was walking across the parking lot, it happened again. She was wide-awake with her eye
s open, yet he seemed to be standing there, right next to her car. She blinked a few times, expecting him to disappear. But no.
If he’d picked this moment to tell her they needed to stay friends, she might just curl up in a ball. A woman could only take so much. Her bruises had bruises. Worse, her heart felt shredded. He’d done that when he walked away. Fine—if he wanted to walk, he should just keep going.
She stopped in front of him but didn’t say anything. For a second, neither did he. He leaned against her car and watched her. Stared, really. The intense scrutiny had her squirming.
“What do you want?” It came out harsher than she’d intended, but she didn’t have anything left in the tank. She couldn’t hide her reactions or control her feelings. She wanted to strike out and scream. Life seemed so unfair at the moment.
“You.”
He’d said that once before and she’d bought it. Not this time. “We’re not sleeping together again.”
He frowned. “I hope that’s not true.”
“Look, Shane.” She inhaled a few times as she worked to keep some portion of the emotional wall she’d built against him in place. “I’m not your consolation prize. I’m not a side benefit to your case.”
“No, you’re not.”
“What are you doing?” The last of her energy drained out of her. Her shoulders slumped and she fought to stay on her feet. “I’m not in the mood for games or for—”
He stepped up and leaned in. Before she could blink, his arms came around her and his lips met hers. He kissed her with a kick of heat and intensity that stole her breath. She held on as his mouth traveled over hers, and her knees buckled.
When he lifted his head again she expected... Actually, she had no idea what to expect. He could have said anything and she would have nodded. Her brain refused to work and every word died in her throat before she could say them.
“I love you.”
Her heart jumped. Hope pulsed inside her, but she tamped it down. He was handing her everything, but she feared it meant nothing. She couldn’t bring herself to believe, so she shut it all down. “No, you don’t.”
Tamed (Corcoran Team: Bulletproof Bachelors Book 3) Page 17