by Amelia Jade
"Yeah, I've been doing it for so long now, but I'm still surprised each time we arrive at a new place."
"You must enjoy the travel, the constant exploration of new places." It wasn't a question, but more of a statement about her. It was something he had to say.
"Oh absolutely," she replied instantly. "I love meeting new people, seeing new cities, towns, and out of the way places, like here," she said enthusiastically, meaning Bear Bluffs.
There was no mistaking the sound of enjoyment in her tone at the way she loved to see the country.
I can't ask her to give that up, to throw away something she's enjoying so much, just to be with me. She deserves better than what I can give her.
Andy wasn't trying to sell himself short, because he knew that his business was doing fine, and he could easily support the two of them if she would stay. But Robyn was interested in a life on the road, never settling down, always looking over that next horizon. She had been doing it for so long now, that he wondered if she was even capable of putting down roots now.
As if to help amplify his point, a small group of children ran by, shrieking as they ran from another, a young boy. He had straw tied to his arms and was swinging them back and forth as if they were swords, trying to slash and poke at the others. At the same time he kept doing his best to imitate an evil laugh each time he got one of them.
Having cubs was another thing he wasn't sure Robyn was ready for. He had no doubt that she would make an excellent mother to some cubs, one day. But he had a hard time believing that she was interested in doing so now. It seemed unlikely that that would be the case. They would make a nomadic lifestyle much tougher, even with the support system he knew she could draw upon from the others who travelled with her.
"Hey!"
The angry cry spun him around immediately. He recognized the voice as well: it was Charlie.
"Yes, Charlie?" Robyn answered, before he could speak up. He admired the way she wasn't afraid of him. The tone between them was much more amicable than the last time, he noticed. She was being firm with him, but not angrily so.
Interesting. What, he wondered, had happened between them when he wasn't there, to help with that bridging of differences?
"Why are you guiding him around back here? He's not one of us, nor does he have a wristband on either."
"You don't have a wristband on," Andy said slowly, pointing to Charlie's wrists.
The man looked at Andy as if he was a moron. "I own all of this. I don't need a wristband," he snarled. "Now, get out of here, Robyn and I need to talk. Without you. Which is where you should be from now on. Not involved."
"I'll leave. But Robyn is a big girl," he snarled, stepping forward until he loomed over Charlie. Finally the smaller man had the good graces to look timid. "And, Charlie, because she's a big girl, she can make big girl choices. Which may or may not include me or you. So whatever they may be, you should respect those choices. Okay?"
"Now listen here. Get the hell out, before I have you thrown out!" Charlie snapped, angry enough to forget just who he was dealing with for a moment.
"We were just leaving anyways, weren't we?" Robyn said, interrupting smoothly before Andy opened his mouth again. His temper was running hot. He didn't like the way Charlie always tried to push the two of them apart.
"Yes, let's go grab a drink. I want to introduce you to the Quencher. Best bar in town," he said, pinching her arm when Robyn began to mention she had been there before.
"Okay, lead on. I could use a double-shot at the moment anyways," she said as they moved away.
He could feel Charlie's eyes on his back the entire way. The man was very clearly interested in Robyn as well, and was not reacting well to the fact that she seemed more interested in someone else. Andy had a suspicion that Charlie wasn't done tampering with their relationship, such as it was.
Why does he care so much? It's not like Robyn's going to stay with me when the week is over.
His bear grew angry over that thought, but he slapped it down, not interested in fighting or listening to it. It was the right thing to do, letting her go free without trying to tie her down. As much as he knew there was something between them, he had to let her go, so that she could decide on her own.
It would be amazing if she did stay, and he would fight anything that got in the way of it, as long as it wasn't Robyn herself. If he needed to change something in his life, if outside forces were conspiring to keep her from staying with him after she had decided, then he would have no limit to what he would do to keep her around.
But if Robyn decided the life he could offer her was not what she was interested in, or ready for, then that was a force he could not, and would not, fight. If he forced her into a situation she did not want, he would not be the man he wanted and claimed to be. The last thing he would do was cage the bear, forcing her to do as he told.
Andy shook his head as they climbed out of the car, the ride over having been spent mostly in silence.
I still have her for a few more days at least. Don't waste that time with her! Make it last.
Long legs powering him forward, he arrived at the door before she did, pulling it open for her.
"Thank you," she said politely, heading inside.
Chapter Ten
Robyn
The bar was busy, much busier than it had been the first time she was here. There were, however, a number of small children present, and at second glance, several of the women appeared pregnant as well. Perhaps, she thought, it was more of a gathering place on Sundays, than an actual bar. There did not seem to be anyone getting too raucous inside.
"Andy!" several people cried at once, rising to greet him.
She vaguely recognized a few of them as having been there the first time she came by. They all came up to say hello, as if they hadn't seen each other in ages. They were all bear shifters too, which endeared her to them.
Names were given and re-given, though she soon forgot them, overwhelmed with the new names and faces. The one that she did remember, however, was Jet. He was the bartender she had met the first time, who had told her how Andy had spoken about her.
Poor Andy. She saw the looks he was getting in response to him bringing a woman. The others tried to be discrete about it, but they were too happy for their friend, so it showed.
"Have you never brought a woman here before?" she whispered into his ear as they grabbed a seat at one of the tables near the bar. Most of the others were in a few booths along the wall next to them. She could see how easily the families all interacted with each other. Several of the women were sitting together with two men she realized were also a couple. One of the men was fetching some finger foods and drinks from the bar.
She winced as the children came shrieking over at the notice of food, digging in to the fries and chicken strips with gusto, for those that were old enough to handle it on their own. The others, a couple of young ones barely walking toddled up to their parents, who fixed other food for them in response. It was one giant walking family.
"No, I've never had the chance to, actually," he said quietly as they pulled their chairs in.
"Really?" she asked, not understanding how someone like Andy could have been single for that long.
"Really," he replied. "Oh, there have been other women here and there. But I was always chasing after the wrong types. Lots of them told me, after realizing where I worked, what I did, that they were more interested in someone up and coming. Someone who wanted to reach the top of the world." He all but spat the last line. She could feel the hurt coming off of him, wanting to reach out and hold him, to tell him that they clearly hadn't understood what they had in him.
"You know what I see?" she asked instead. "I see a man who takes pride in his job, and his life. You know who you are, and what you want to do, and you've become good at it on top of that. There aren't that many people out there who can say that, Andy."
She took a sip of her drink and continued. "Your shop is tidy, your house is
tidy, things are organized, kept in working order, and everything is well maintained. That is not the sign of someone simply dragging through life at the bottom. You have found your calling, it's that simple."
"Thank you," he said slowly, blinking in shock at the strength of her words.
"Don't thank me. I had nothing to do with you. You were the person you are long before I parked my sorry ass in front of you looking for help."
They both smiled at that, remembering the circumstances of their meeting.
"Seriously, though, ego-speech aside, you should be proud of what you've done, Andy. Hell, you had no one around as a youngster, yet you still managed to claw your way up, get an education and now you run your own business. Don't let anybody throw you around and step on you."
"I've never met anyone like you," he said, looking down into his beer as he spoke.
"What do you mean?" she asked, unsure of where he was going with it. Was he going to ask her to stay?
"Exactly what I said. You're not like so many of the other women out there. You see the things people hope others see, but that so rarely are noticed in the world today. Everything is about material wealth and looks, and yet here you are, telling me that it's the stuff around me and how I treat it, that you notice. That's the complete opposite of everyone else, you know. It's refreshing," he concluded, taking another sip.
"My sister taught me that," she said somberly, remembering all the times her sister had told her she needed to look at more than just what type of car a guy drove or if he had a six-pack. That it was the thing behind his gorgeous features that mattered, and how the people and things around him reacted that mattered as well. It wasn't until after she died that Robyn had begun to truly understand that advice, for she found herself missing those parts of her sister the most.
"Hi," came the light-voiced word from off to her right.
She looked down, seeing one of the kids there for the first time, looking back up at her. The little girl had something clutched in her fist.
"Hi, little one," she said, trying to clamp down on the sensation in her stomach, to keep a smile on her face.
"You'uboo'o'ful," the girl said, sticking out her hand. In it was one of the chicken fingers from their snack tray.
"Oh, you're so cute," she all but squealed at the cuteness of it, accepting the gift. The girl ran off in embarrassment and buried her head in what Robyn took to be her father's leg. He was looking over at her and just smiled knowingly. She tried to return the look, though she knew it was faltering. Quickly she turned back to Andy and her drink.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
Damnit. He had noticed. Robyn really had not wanted to get into this conversation today, but she was a terrible liar.
Besides, he deserves to know before you get any closer. It's not his fault.
"Do you not like kids?" he asked softly.
"No, it's not that, Andy. I love kids. I love them so much. They're amazing. The way they look up to you for knowledge and guidance, it's an amazing thing to see in their eyes."
She looked up at him, into his eyes. Those intelligent, caring eyes, so different from that of a child, and yet, so similar.
"I want kids, Andy. A couple of cubs, running around the den. It sounds wonderful."
"But," he said for her, having sensed that it was coming. She could see him bracing for her words.
"I can't."
"Why not?" he asked, blinking in confusion.
"I had a bad accident, a few years back. Everything healed, but it was into my reproductive system, and they healed, but in the wrong positions. Just like if we break a bone, it heals that way if we don't reset it fast enough. Same problem."
"Oh my god," he said, horrified. He reached out his hand to grab hers. "Robyn, I'm so sorry. I should never have brought it up."
She waved his protests down. After all, it hurt, but Andy had deserved to know the truth about her body. Like her car, Robyn needed some new parts.
"The doctors gave me one, maybe two percent chance of ever conceiving a child."
Andy simply held her hand. She appreciated that, needing a moment to gather herself after opening up such a painful memory.
At that moment, the jukebox in the corner came awake, playing a slow ballad as several of the other couples got up and wandered over to the cleared area in front that served as a dance floor.
"Can I?" Andy said, sliding out of his seat but leaving his hand outstretched in an invitation to dance.
"I—" she started, but it was too late, Andy had already whisked her to her feet and was gently propelling her to the dance floor.
He wrapped one of his arms around her waist. She could feel the strength in him even then as he pulled her close, the other massive paw closing around her hand.
They danced to several successive songs. Robyn relaxed and let him lead, resting her head against his broad chest as they swayed around the dance floor slowly, each of them lost in their own thoughts. She wondered if Andy was still concerned about the fact that she could not bear him any cubs. Would that be a deal breaker, she wondered?
Think, Robyn. He still hasn't asked you to stay with him yet. If he doesn't ask, then it doesn't matter about young ones. He has to invite you into his world first. You know you can't ask yourself.
"You know," he whispered into his ear. "I could get used to this. You're one hell of a woman, Robyn."
She tensed, wondering if he had been able to read her mind. Was this it?
"In fact, I know this sounds crazy, but I think I'm falling in love with you." He laughed nervously, not letting the sound carry past the two of them. "I am falling in love with you," he corrected. "You're the perfect woman, the type that I could see as my mate."
Here it comes.
"I love the way you've lived such a life up until now. It's had its downs, I know, but it's been so full of things. The way you get out, see the country. I've never been out beyond King City. That was an experience," he chuckled.
"If anything, I'm a little envious that I can't come and join you when you leave," he said remorsefully.
What? Did he just—?
"I can see how you would never want to give that up."
He was giving her an out. She wasn't sure if Andy was doing it because he didn't want her to stay, or because he thought she didn't want to. Her system was in shock, for it was not what she had expected to be the outcome for the night. Words came and went, she found herself unable to respond to what he was saying besides nodding, though she certainly didn't agree.
What the hell is going on?
The song ended, and they returned to their seats. She downed the rest of her drink and signaled Jet for a fresh one. That came, and she finished it as Andy excused himself to go to the washroom.
Come on, words! Fucking work. Don't let this go to waste.
She drank another, hoping the alcohol would fuel some liquid courage, to allow her to speak her mind to Andy, but the more she drank, the less talkative she became. After the fifth one, she was well on her way to an epic drunk.
"Come on, Robyn," he said, helping her out of her seat. "I need to get you back home."
My home could be with you. She wanted to say it so badly, to spit the words out, to let him know she would stay with him, if only he would ask. But they wouldn't come—she couldn't find the courage within herself to say it. Instead, she just nodded and made an agreeable sounding noise as they left the Quencher behind.
Andy helped her get home and inside, giving her a soft kiss on the forehead before he turned and left.
She couldn't sleep, however. The room was spinning, so she went in search of some water from one of the midway pits. On her way back, she noticed that the light was still on in Charlie's camper.
Wanting to yell at him for earlier, she stumbled over. It took her two or three tries, she wasn't sure, to properly grab the latch handle and pull it open. The stairs stretched up way in front of her, but she tackled them gamely.
"Charlie," she said w
ith as much anger as she could muster.
"Yes, Robyn?" he said, turning to face her, surprise on his face.
"I'm going to throw up, do you have a bag?"
He looked startled for a moment, then grabbed the nearest trashcan and shoved it into her arms.
"Can I stay here?" she asked, the room spinning. She no longer had to throw up, the sensation fading. For the moment.
"Of course," he said, leading her over to the bed, laying her down on it as he sat down next to her. "You can stay as long as you want."
"Why do you have to be a dick sometimes?" she asked suddenly. "You can be nice, but then sometimes you're such an asshole."
Charlie laughed. "I'm busy and stressed, Robyn. I don't always mean it, especially with you. It's just that I get jealous when I see you with that guy, whatever his name is."
"Jealous?" she asked, the alcohol dulling her reaction.
"I'm in love with you, Robyn. I have been for a long time."
"You don't love me," she denied his words, sticking out her hand. Instead of it pushing him away slightly, her hand ended up wrapping around his neck.
He didn't resist, leaning in to kiss her softly.
He's so gentle.
Then his hand grabbed her arm and pinned it above her head. Charlie began to climb on top of her, their mouths still locked. She let him, wondering if being with Charlie would be the same as with Andy, who didn't want her to stay.
"Can I stay? Would you want me to stay?" she asked.
"Please stay with me, Robyn," he replied.
He wants me to stay with him.
Charlie began to paw at her clothing, roughly and awkwardly. His lips kissed her roughly on her neck, and down her chest as he undid her buttons. His fingers were cold against her skin, like ice.
This was nothing like being with Andy.
Robyn tried roll him aside, but he didn't budge. She snarled and used the strength of her bear to simply move him. One moment Charlie was on top of her, the next he was on the other side of the bed, rebounding off the wall.
"Stop," she slurred.
"Okay?" he said, confused. "I thought you wanted this, Robyn. I thought that's why you came to me."