by Khloe Wren
As I took another pull on my brew, I had to admit, at least to myself, that I missed the man. We’d formed a fast friendship spending so much time together. And then there was Lydia. I definitely missed sassy, beautiful Lydia. I closed my eyes and let the memories flow of our night together. Of how I ate her sweet pussy until she came so hard she was ready to sleep. Not that I let her. Nope, I slid in deep and gave her the ride of her life. Fuck, what I wouldn’t give for another night with her sexy ass.
My phone alarm going off brought me back to the present and away from remembering one of the best nights of my life. Fuck. Silencing my phone, I stood and with a huff, rearranged my hard cock before I headed back inside. Tossing my empty beer bottle in the trash, I quietly made my way through the house to check on Ma. Discovering her sound asleep, I headed downstairs and made sure the deadbolts were engaged on both doors so she would be unable to go wandering before Beth turned up. Then I was on my bike and heading over to the clubhouse to do my shift at the bar.
I’d been feeling restless for a while now, long before the trip up north. And it wasn’t just because of Ma. The fact I was still nothing but a prospect two years after joining the Charons didn’t help. The club seemed happy enough with all that I did for them, but even after all this time I still didn’t have my full colors. Mind you, neither did Jazz. It wasn’t just me the club seemed to have forgotten about. All the same, it fucking pissed me off that the newer prospects got the same treatment as those of us who’d been there a lot longer.
It was supposed to only take around a year to go from prospect to patched in brother. I had no idea why they’d left the pair of us hanging like they had. I mean, there had been a hell of a lot of shit go down with the club in that time. But still, didn’t seem right. And when added to the stress over the situation with my mother, it put me on edge.
That was why later in the night, when I’d finished up my shift behind the bar and was heading out to have a little fun with the boys out by the fire before I headed home, things went south.
“Hey! Bash, need you out front to guard the door.”
With a curse, I spun toward the man who’d spoken. I didn’t recognize the voice, but if it was a patched in brother, I had to fucking listen and obey. When I saw it was not only a prospect, but a new one, I narrowed my eyes. Who did this fucking bastard think he was?
“I’ve done my work for the night, how about you go do yours, yeah?”
He had one of the club whores pressed up against a wall and clearly had plans for her, but fuck him. I wasn’t going to take shit from a newbie prospect and take over his job so he could ball a fucking club whore.
Releasing her, he turned on me. “What the fuck is your problem? You’re a prospect, just like me. Doesn’t matter which of us is on the front door. And we all know you won’t be making use of the girls so what gives?”
A prospect like him. His words rang in my ears like a fucking church bell. Then something snapped and with a growl, I lunged at the fucker. Leading with a fist, it cracked against his jaw, snapping his head to the side before he could react.
“I ain’t like you. I’ve been here two fucking years and have earned my fucking place. Unlike you, I’ve never fucking slacked off. I was on the bar tonight, just finished my shift, so now I’m gonna enjoy my fucking down time, not do your fucking job for you so you can get your dick wet.”
He recovered from my blow and with a curse, threw one back at me. I knocked it aside as I slammed my other fist into his gut.
“Two years? What did you do to make ‘em hold off on your patch like that?”
My vision went red because wasn’t that the question of the day. Barely aware of my movements, I kept throwing punches and kicks as he hurled them back. He landed some good shots, but I didn’t feel a thing. Rage, pure and lethal, flowed through me.
“Enough!”
Keys’ voice echoed around the room as a thick arm went around my neck and hauled me back.
“C’mon, buddy. Settle down.”
Recognizing Keg’s voice, I stopped struggling and closed my eyes. After a couple deep breaths, my body relaxed and he loosened his hold.
“We good?”
“Yeah. I’m calm.”
I opened my eyes to look for the prospect who had started it all. He was standing on the other side of the room, pressing a towel to his nose that was bleeding like a fountain. He was glaring at me so I glared right back. Fucking prick.
Keys pointed to the other guy. “You. Get your ass in the kitchen and let my woman take a look at you. Try anything with her and you’ll be a dead man. Bank, go with ‘em.”
Donna was a nurse and was well-practiced at patching up Charons. I watched as Bank all but dragged the prospect down the hall before Keys turned to me.
“You—”
Arrow cut him off. “You go with the others to your woman, I’ll take care of Bash.”
Not giving Keys time to argue, Arrow gave me a nod then turned and headed toward the offices. Pulling free from Keg’s hold on me, I followed. The clubhouse was unnaturally silent and I wondered if I was about to be shown the door. Permanently. And that got me wondering if that wouldn’t be such a bad thing.
He unlocked a door and held it open for me to enter before he closed it and moved past me to lean against the desk that sat in the center of the space.
“Sit your ass down, boy.”
Suddenly feeling tired as hell, I allowed my body to crumple onto the couch. I went to rub a palm over my face but the moment I made contact, it hurt like hell so I dropped my hand back down.
“Yeah, that shit’s gonna hurt for a while. Of course, not as much as young Brett’s gonna be feeling it. What’d he do?”
“Nothing. It was nothing.”
“That’s a load of bullshit and we both know it. Don’t make me waste time by tracking down Keys and getting him to bring up the feed from the cameras.”
Fucking Keys. Felt like he had every inch of the whole damn town wired some days.
Over everything and wanting to get this shit over with, with a growl, I started talking.
“It’d been a long fucking day before I even got here. Then just as I’d finished my shift at the bar and was heading out to the fire for a couple drinks of my own with the others, he tried to order me to take his place out front. All so he could ball a fucking club whore.”
Arrow’s gaze narrowed for a minute as he watched me. I cleared my throat and squirmed some as the silence dragged on. I just wanted this shit over with already so I could go home and end this fucking day.
“While that was a pansy-ass move for him to pull, it’s not something that would normally send you into a rage like that. If Keg hadn’t pulled you off him, do you think you would have stopped any time soon?”
A sudden wave of shame filled me. We both knew the answer to that. I wouldn’t have. I would have killed Brett if we hadn’t been stopped. I hung my head, shaking it no to answer him.
“Bash, this ain’t like you. Normally? A prospect pulls shit like this, they’d be shown the door and not welcome back, but you’re not really a standard prospect—”
He stopped talking when I glared up at him, some of my earlier rage returning.
“Starting to think all I’ll ever be ‘round here is a fucking prospect.”
He nodded, his expression dead serious. “It’s been too long. We all know it. You’ve earned your colors. Scout was planning on taking it to a vote once this shit with Sabella got dealt with. But that’s just a formality, we all know you’ll get voted in.” He held my gaze for a few moments before continuing. “The fact you don’t look happy about that makes me think this is about something else. You’ve been on edge for a while now and I’d assumed it was about the lack of a back patch on your cut, but now I’m thinking otherwise. The time has come for you to quit hiding shit and fucking tell me what’s got you hurting like you are.”
I held his gaze as my thoughts tripped over themselves. There was so much, and did he really
want to know? Did I want him to know?
Arrow grabbed a chair, and putting it on the floor in front of me, straddled it backwards, resting his arms on the top of the back of the thing and staring me straight in the eye.
“Is it your ma?”
My fucking eyes stung as Arrow hit the nail on the head first go. What the fuck? Was the man psychic? Sucking in a breath I rubbed my eyes, forcing the moisture away before Arrow saw it.
“Is it another tumor?”
I shook my head. “No tumor. At least, not that we know about. Fuck, I guess it could be another one that’s causing it. She was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s a while back.”
“Ah, fuck, man. Why didn’t you tell us? We wouldn’t have sent you up north if we’d known.”
That left me wincing. I wouldn’t have met Lydia, wouldn’t have had my night with her if they’d known.
Arrow chuckled darkly. “Although, you did enjoy your time up there, didn’t you? Maybe the break away was just what you needed. Either way, if we’d known, we would have given you time off from doing club jobs. You need to spend all the time you can with your ma before it’s too late.”
With a sad smile I shook my head. “It’s already too late half the time. Guess I look just like my old man did when he was younger. I spend more time pretending to be my pop than I do being myself at this point.”
“She still living at home?”
I nodded. “Yeah. I made some calls today to try to get her into a home but there’s fucking waiting lists everywhere.”
“What made you call today?”
I huffed at him with a shake of my head. “You came by your name honestly, didn’t you?”
He shrugged a shoulder. “Straight as an arrow, straight to the heart of the problem. Gets the job done.”
I shook my head again. “She wandered off a few nights back. The front door on our place needed oil in a bad way so I heard it open. Managed to catch her before she got past the front gate. But it was an eye opener.”
Silence filled the room and I started rubbing at my throbbing jaw. I’d gotten in more hits than Brett, but he did manage to get a couple in that I’d be feeling for the next day or so.
“You good to ride home, or you want a lift?”
“I’ll be fine on my bike.”
He gave me a nod. “Take the rest of the week off. Ten am Saturday you’ll be back here. We’re gonna have a sit down and get shit sorted out. Now, get outta here and go home. Might wanna put some ice on your jaw and that eye.”
He stood and shoved the chair back to where it had been as I rose and groaned at the ache in my ribs that started up with my movement. Fuck, I was gonna be feeling that shit in the morning. Arrow gave me a slap to the shoulder as I passed him and headed out to the main room. Things had returned to the usual noisy state that the clubhouse was in this late at night and I managed to slip out the front door without gaining too much attention.
Chapter 5
The next morning I’d managed to keep my head down and avoid Ma as I got ready for work and headed out. Beth had cocked an eyebrow at my busted-up face but hadn’t said a word.
The boys on the construction site didn’t say a thing about it, but I knew they wouldn’t. It was far from the first time one of our crew had rocked up looking worse for wear. Thankfully the day passed quickly and before I knew it, I was back home bidding Beth farewell and closing the door behind her.
“You gonna tell me who did that to your face?”
Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath before I reopened my lids and turned to face my mother. I wasn’t sure if she thought I was me or my old man yet, so I wasn’t sure what the fuck to tell her. She stood a few feet from me with her arms crossed over her chest. Her jaw was a hard line and the glint in her eyes had me thinking she was having a good day and knew who I was.
“It’s nothing, Ma. Had a bit of a disagreement with one of the boys down the clubhouse last night.”
Her gaze narrowed as it ran over me, I could feel her cataloging all my injuries with her mom radar.
“The clubhouse, huh? And where was Scout when this was happening?”
I frowned. The way she said his name had my own radar going. Sure, she’d have known he was the president from when my pops had been in the club, but Ma never hung around the club like some of the other old ladies. She didn’t even speak with him at Pop’s funeral, so why was she now dropping his name like they were friends?
“I believe he was home with his woman and kids. His son is only a few months old so he doesn’t do the late night stuff too often these days.”
She came up to me and took my chin between her thumb and finger, shifting my face to get a good look at the bruising and swelling along my jaw, cheekbone and eye.
“Would it make you feel better if I told you the other guy looks a lot worse than me?”
She actually growled a little, which made me smile. I’d missed my mother so much. It had been hard having her physically close, yet mentally so far away.
“No, it would not. You’re not a brawler, Jake. What the hell got into you? And I’ll be talking to Scout. He promised me!”
I gently removed her hand from where she was adding a bruise to my chin.
“Ma, calm down. I ain’t hurt that bad. It’s nothing that won’t heal in a couple of days. What do you mean, Scout promised you?”
She clenched her jaw before she spun on her heel and headed away from me. I followed her, not only wanting an answer to my question but I also didn’t want to waste a moment of this time that she was lucid and knew who I was.
She went to the kitchen and poured two glasses of iced tea before she sat at the table, sliding a glass over to me when I followed her lead and sat opposite her.
“About two years ago, just before my surgery, I went to Scout to ask him a favor. You see, not only were they in that club together, but Scout was in the Marines with your father as well. They served together for a time. So, I went to him and asked that he watch over you.” She paused with a wince and took a drink before she continued in a hushed voice. “I wasn’t sure I’d survive the surgery.”
With my heart aching, I thought back to that time when Scout and Bulldog had first approached me, inviting me to come to the clubhouse for a beer. I’d been reeling over Ma’s upcoming surgery, throwing myself into work and not much else. In my attempts to avoid my old man at all times, I’d never considered the Charons as a viable option for me until then. But honestly? The club had been a nice change of pace. A place I could really relax and let go. I could see why my pop spent so much time there. Pretty much every man there had some kind of demon chasing him, and they’d not busted my balls over the fact I was keeping quiet about what mine was. They hadn’t wanted to get in my head and work me out which suited me just fine.
It had been a few months later, after Ma had her surgery and pulled through, that Scout had invited me to become a prospect. I’d jumped at the chance, feeling like I’d found where I fit in the world. Now I started to wonder how much of that invite was out of obligation to his promise to his former Charon and USMC brother’s widow, and nothing to do with me.
“I hadn’t been sure encouraging you into that life was a good idea, but I could see you getting lost. Working all the damn time and fussing after me when you weren’t. You needed more in your life, son. You needed something that would make you smile and it seemed like the Charon MC gave you that. At least it did. Now I can’t remember the last time I saw you smile.” She frowned with a sigh. “Of course, that could be due to me not remembering, rather than you not smiling. I’m sorry you’re getting saddled with me being sick again. You’re young. You should be out there riding free and having fun. Not here, probably worried every time you see me if I’ll still remember who you are.”
Her voice cut out on a sob and my fucking eyes stung with emotion. Under the illness, she knew more than I’d thought she would. I reached out and wrapped a hand around hers.
“Ma, I’d do anything for
you. You need me, I’m here. Always.”
She brushed her tears away with her free hand. “Such a charmer. Were you telling me the truth the other day? About having a woman?”
After giving her hand a pat, I pulled mine back and took a drink of the cold iced tea. “I did meet a woman, while I was up in New York. But I’m not sure when I’ll be able to see her again.”
She gave me a sad smile that had me worried about where she was heading with this conversation.
“Maybe a fresh start in a new place would do you good. Maybe it’s time I moved into a home and let you spread your wings some.”
My eyes widened in shock. “Ma, I’d never shove you into a home then move clear halfway across the country.”
She chuckled. “I know you’d come visit me as often as you could. And sadly, I don’t know how much longer my mind is going to give me. No use in you being held down by me when I don’t know who you are anymore.”
Her voice hitched at the end again and tears now streamed down her cheeks. I hated this. All of it. The fucking disease that was stealing so much from us both. The fact neither of us had control over our lives. My heart ached. We were both stuck in a cycle of merely surviving, neither of us really living our lives.
“Ah, Ma. Come here.”
I stood and pulled her up from her chair, tugging her in against my chest as I wrapped my arms around the woman who’d loved me with her whole heart since before I’d been born. As her tears soaked my shirt, I found I couldn’t blink fast enough to stop my own from falling. Somewhere deep inside, I knew this was going to be one of the last times I had with my Ma fully lucid, and it fucking shattered me. The very thought of losing the one constant I’d always had in my life was more than I could process.
“I love you, Ma, and I’d never abandon you, no matter what.”
Her grip on me tightened and we just stood there for a long time, before she pulled back, patted my chest with her palm and headed out of the kitchen toward her room. I grabbed a beer and moved out to the back porch. Sitting in the swing and rocking myself, I let my thoughts wander as I watched the sun head toward the horizon.