‘No, don’t think,’ he encouraged softly. ‘Just answer me.’ He looked at her with probing eyes.
She swallowed hard, moistening her lips. ‘Yes, he was,’ she told him agitatedly. ‘But if you think that meant anything to him, don’t. He got a tremendous kick out of knowing he was the first, but it really wasn’t that important to him, in fact I’m sure he would rather I’d been more experienced. You and he are very much alike in some ways, neither of you wants a permanent commitment.’
‘You’re wrong.’
‘No, I—’
‘About me, I mean,’ he cut in gently. ‘I can’t speak for Joel, I don’t know what his hang-up is—’
‘He doesn’t have one,’ she assured him bitterly.
‘Oh yes,’ the other man nodded, ‘he has one. But whatever it is I don’t have it. I’ve been looking for forty-one years to find the other half of myself. And I can’t settle for second best, no matter how beautiful or nice the woman is. I want the woman who was meant just for me.’
‘You’re a romantic!’
‘So are you, under all that cynicism that’s rubbed off on you from Joel.’ His hand covered both of hers as they rested in her lap. ‘If he’s the one you want you should fight for him, not leave him in the clutches of other women.’
Her mouth twisted. ‘I think you have that the wrong way around,’ she derided. ‘Joel controls all his relationships.’
‘Is that why he’s been glaring at me as if he would like to see me dead?’
She flushed. ‘That’s my fault, I’m afraid, I told him you and I weren’t going out together. I had no idea Cally was going to invite you here tonight,’ she added dully.
‘If Joel doesn’t care about you why should he be interested?’ Malcolm raised dark brows.
‘You don’t understand—’
‘I think it’s you who doesn’t understand, Lindsay. Take it from one of his own sex, Joel is a very confused man at the moment.’
‘He looks it,’ she mocked.
‘Believe me, Lindsay—’
‘Ah, there you both are,’ Cally spied them on the balcony. ‘I thought two of my guests had absconded already!’
Malcolm had stood up as soon as the other woman joined them on the balcony, retaining a hold of one of Lindsay’s hands to pull her up beside him. ‘I just wanted to be alone with this lovely lady for a few minutes,’ he explained smoothly.
Cally looked pleased that her matchmaking was going so well. ‘We’ll be going in to dinner in a few minutes, so if you wouldn’t mind …’ she added pointedly.
‘Not at all.’ He put Lindsay’s hand firmly in the crook of his arm, holding it there with his other hand. ‘I hope you’ve seated me next to Lindsay.’
‘But of course,’ Cally smiled at them both.
Lindsay had no idea what Malcolm was trying to do, but she was grateful for his support as they returned to the lounge under the cold stare of tawny eyes. Joel was surrounded by attentive women and men as usual, one of those people that, however taciturn themselves, still managed to attract people to him, and he looked as if he were being at his remotest this evening, adding nothing to the conversation about him, drinking steadily from the glass of whisky in his hand.
‘Does he get legless or just unpleasant?’ Malcolm spoke close to her ear as they went through to the dining-room.
Lindsay didn’t pretend to misunderstand him. ‘He stays exactly as he is.’
‘What a pity,’ said Malcolm with relish. ‘I would have liked to have seen him lose a little of that control.’
As far as she knew there was only one occasion when Joel lost his inhibitions enough to let someone else control him, and then he was intoxicated with desire, not alcohol! Under his teaching she had learnt to please him, to occasionally be the aggressor in their lovemaking, but as if seeing it as a weakness Joel usually held back at those times, being much more comfortable when he controlled their passion.
‘Excuse me for a moment while I just have a word with Judi,’ she said hastily, knowing that Malcolm was astute enough to read her thoughts. ‘I feel a little guilty for deserting her as we did.’
‘She doesn’t look in need of your moral support,’ Malcolm remarked dryly.
Lindsay looked across the room to where Judi was in animated conversation with Glen Shumann. ‘No, she doesn’t does she?’ she realised with amusement, relieved that her sister was getting on so well with the other man. In her agitation at seeing Joel she had selfishly forgotten all about Judi’s welfare, allowing herself to be taken outside by Malcolm without a second thought for her sister. ‘Still, I’ll just check that she’s all right, if you don’t mind.’
‘Go right ahead,’ he invited.
Judi was flushed and more beautiful than Lindsay had seen her in a long time, her eyes glowing as she turned to look at her sister. ‘I’m fine,’ she assured Lindsay at her apologetic query. ‘Glen has been looking after me.’
Lindsay raised blonde brows. ‘I can see that.’
Judi gave her a derisive glance. ‘He’s been telling me all about his wife and two children in America.’
‘Oh,’ she looked confused.
Judi laughed softly, obviously enjoying herself. ‘And how much he misses them,’ she added mischievously.
‘Oh,’ said Lindsay again, feeling a little foolish. ‘I didn’t realise,’ she spoke to Glen. ‘I mean, I had no idea—’
‘Your sister is a very sympathetic listener,’ he gave an understanding smile.
‘Well, as long as you’re sure you’re all right?’ she prompted Judi.
‘I’m fine,’ her sister nodded. ‘But about Joel,’ she added in a conspiratorial whisper. ‘Which one is he?’
Lindsay blushed as Glen gave her a curious look. ‘Judi, could we talk about this later—’
‘Good evening, Lindsay,’ a harsh voice grated softly. ‘Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friend?’
She turned slowly, aware that her cheeks had gone first red and then pale, her eyes suddenly luminous. Joel stood alone, strangely still and dangerous, a watchful air about him. ‘Aren’t you going to introduce us to yours?’ The bitchy comment came out before she could stop herself.
His mouth twisted derisively. ‘Joanne is being dazzled by the world of politics at the moment,’ he looked pointedly across the room to where the model was deep in conversation with David Robin, their host.
‘So being at a loose end for a few minutes you thought you would come over and be introduced to the only female you don’t know in the room?’ Her mockery was brittle. ‘How nice!’
His eyes had narrowed to icy slits. ‘What the hell is the matter with you—’
‘You must be Joel,’ Judi interrupted brightly, putting out her hand in a friendly gesture. ‘I’m Judi Pope.’
Joel slowly took the offered hand. ‘Pope …?’
‘I’m Lindsay’s sister,’ she explained lightly.
His gaze flickered briefly over Lindsay before moving back to Judi, a charming smile suddenly relaxing his harsh features. ‘Lindsay didn’t tell me how beautiful you are, otherwise I might have taken her up on her offer to meet her family,’ he said smoothly.
Lindsay felt what little colour there was leave her face, her body went rigid. God, he was a cruel bastard, flirting with her own sister in a way designed to hurt her.
Judi met his gaze unflinchingly. ‘We’re a very dull lot, I’m afraid,’ she told him evenly. ‘Lindsay is the adventurous one in our family—and not always with happy results,’ she added challengingly.
Joel’s mouth tightened at the intended insult. ‘Really?’
‘Yes—really,’ her friendly smile didn’t take the sting out of her words. ‘I’m so glad to have had this opportunity to meet you, Mr Sutherland,’ she said dismissively. ‘It’s been an—enlightening experience. Now if you’ll excuse us, Glen and I are going to take our places at the table.’ She walked away with great dignity, a bewildered Glen following in her wake.
Jo
el watched her with an appreciative gleam in his eyes. ‘You didn’t tell me about the family resemblance,’ he remarked softly to Lindsay.
‘Our colouring is very—’
‘Not the colouring,’ he looked down at her with enigmatically gold eyes. ‘Judi’s tongue is as sharp as yours.’
She stiffened. ‘I’m sure she didn’t mean anything by it.’
‘And I’m equally sure she did,’ he said with amusement. ‘I liked her.’
‘I’m sure she’ll be glad to hear it,’ Lindsay snapped tightly.
He sobered as he looked down at her. ‘Lindsay, why are we doing this to each other? I still want you, and I’d swear you still want me,’ his voice had lowered seductively. ‘Why don’t we make our excuses right now and go back to my apartment?’
‘To your bed, you mean?’ she amended waspishly.
‘God, yes,’ he groaned huskily.
Her eyes flashed with anger. ‘You might be able to solve all your problems between the sheets, Joel, but you certainly can’t solve mine!’
‘I could try,’ he encouraged throatily. ‘I always could in the past.’
‘No, I—’
‘Cally’s waiting for us to sit down, honey.’ Malcolm appeared at her side, his arm possessive about her waist. ‘Hi, Joel,’ he greeted the other man in a friendly voice, just as if he didn’t know he had interrupted a very private conversation. ‘I think your girl-friend is looking for you.’
Joel’s hand came out to clasp Lindsay’s arm. ‘What’s your answer?’ He ignored the other man.
She looked straight up at Malcolm. ‘Dinner sounds like a good idea,’ she said lightly. ‘Perhaps we’ll see you later, Joel,’ she turned back to him. ‘You and Miss Honeyville.’ Her head was high as she allowed Malcolm to escort her to the table, where Judi was sitting at Malcolm’s other side, Glen next to her.
‘Propositioning you, was he?’ Malcolm said softly.
‘You could say that,’ she answered vaguely, pretending not to notice as Joel was seated at the opposite end of the table, sitting on Cally’s left, Joanne at his side.
‘He doesn’t want to let go, does he?’ Malcolm looked thoughtful.
She flashed him an irritated look. ‘He doesn’t like being told no, you mean.’
His mouth quirked with amusement. ‘I’m sure it must be a novelty.’ He looked pointedly down the table to where several women were trying to gain Joel’s attention, while he morosely ignored them all.
‘Yes,’ Lindsay acknowledged waspishly.
He eyed her curiously. ‘Is that why you said it?’
‘Said what?’ she frowned her impatience, wishing he would talk about something else, anything else.
‘No. Walking out on him was guaranteed to make him either go all out to get you back or go out with a number of other women to salvage his pride.’
She sipped the wine that had just been poured for her with agitated movements. ‘Then it must be obvious which one he chose!’
‘Or was forced to choose.’ He gave a rueful shrug at her disbelieving snort. ‘Joel comes over to me as a man with a lot on his mind—and not all of it pleasant.’
‘Even less so since you gave him the problem of Marilyn Mills to think over!’ she derided.
‘Changing the subject?’ he murmured.
She grimaced. ‘How did you guess?’
‘Oh, just male intuition, I guess,’ he said self-derisively. ‘Okay, I’ve probed enough for one night. But who would have guessed there was a powder-keg boiling under such a cool façade?’
‘Joel?’ she frowned.
‘You,’ he mused. ‘It’s almost worth cancelling my return to the States to see how this puzzle works out.’
‘You’re leaving?’
‘Not yet,’ he shrugged. ‘But soon.’
‘Well, don’t delay on our account, our puzzle has already ended.’
‘You sounded very firm when you said that?’
‘I am.’ She looked at him with challenge.
Malcolm stared straight back at her for several timeless seconds, then he nodded. ‘If you don’t want to discuss Joel any more let’s go on to another interesting subject.’
Lindsay could feel the tension leaving her body at his acceptance of her wishes, knowing he could be even more determined than her if he chose to be. ‘Such as?’ she prompted lightly.
‘Judi.’ He glanced fleetingly at her sister as she still talked avidly to Glen, obviously enjoying herself despite her earlier misgivings. ‘Tell me about Judi,’ he invited huskily.
She smiled, knowing now that she had been right about his interest in her sister earlier. ‘She’s my older sister by two years, is kind to animals and elderly people, works as a secretary, and lives at home with my mother and younger brother.’
Malcolm shook his head. ‘I could have got all that from Judi herself. I want to know what happened to put the shadows in her eyes.’
Lindsay sobered at his perception. ‘That’s something Judi will have to tell you—if she wants to.’
He grimaced. ‘Do you think I would come under the heading of “kind to elderly people"?’
She laughed softly. ‘I doubt it.’
‘I didn’t think so,’ he said ruefully.
‘Although that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to gain her confidence,’ she added quickly.
His eyes widened with renewed interest. ‘You think I could?’
Lindsay smiled gently, knowing he really was genuinely attracted to Judi. And he was sensitive enough to have realised she had been hurt in the past, he wasn’t the type of man who would deliberately see her hurt again. ‘I think it’s worth a try. Now eat your dinner,’ she encouraged lightly, aware that they were the last to finish the first course. ‘We’re holding everyone up,’ she blushed as she looked up and found hard tawny eyes on her.
She was still a little shaken from that encounter with Joel before dinner; she had been unprepared for him to ask her back to his apartment in that way. And if she had been prepared? Her answer would still have had to be the same, no matter how tempted she was to say yes, to take one more night in his arms.
‘That doesn’t mean we have to stop talking altogether,’ Malcolm mocked her continued silence during the meal.
She blushed lightly. ‘Sorry. I was—I was deep in thought.’
His mouth twisted. ‘I can guess about what.’
She gave a guilty shrug. ‘I haven’t thanked you yet for coming to my assistance earlier.’
‘Think nothing of it,’ he dismissed. ‘To make up for it you can help me get to know your sister better later.’
‘I’d be glad to,’ Lindsay smiled.
Dinner was a long-drawn-out affair, the guests a curious mixture of Cally’s friends from her modelling days and David’s political friends, the two somehow seeming to make scintillating company. And if Joel hadn’t been there Lindsay was sure she would have enjoyed herself immensely. But he was there, and she was aware of his every move, stiffened with distress and jealousy every time Joanne touched him with scarlet-tipped fingers.
‘It can eat you up alive, you know,’ Malcolm murmured as they went back to the lounge after the meal.
She shot him a sharp look. ‘I can’t help the way I feel.’
‘Maybe not, but you could try giving him back the same treatment.’
‘Are you offering your services?’ she mused.
‘Why not?’ he shrugged. ‘He’s already as mad as hell at both of us.’
‘And Judi wouldn’t understand at all,’ she told him pointedly, aware of the surreptitious looks her sister had been shooting Malcolm during the meal, blushing like a schoolgirl if he should happen to speak to her.
Malcolm’s eyes were a warm blue. ‘Your sister is a sweet and unusual lady.’
‘Yes, she is,’ she agreed unhesitantly. ‘And I want to see her happy, thinking there’s something between the two of us could only complicate matters, don’t you think?’ She eyed him mockingly.
&nbs
p; He looked disconcerted by her candour, and then he gave a rueful grin. ‘You’re a very astute young lady,’ he murmured finally.
‘Just very fond of my sister,’ she corrected softly.
‘You think I stand a chance with her?’
‘I think you have a better one if I don’t complicate things for you,’ she told him cautiously, knowing how reluctant Judi was to become emotionally involved with anyone since Jonathan, no matter how coy her reaction was to Malcolm.
‘Cally mentioned that Judi is staying the weekend with you …?’
‘Yes?’ she gave him a teasing smile. ‘What did you have in mind?’
‘Would the two of you like to spend the day with me tomorrow?’
Lindsay laughed softly. ‘Why don’t you just ask Judi out on your own?’
‘She may not come,’ he answered honestly.
It was strangely endearing to see this normally self-confident man so vulnerable. ‘All right,’ she agreed softly. ‘We could drive out and have lunch somewhere.’
He leant forward and kissed her gently on the mouth. ‘Thank you.’
There was no doubting his sincerity where Judi was concerned, his genuine desire to get to know her. But as Lindsay looked across the room and met Joel’s coldly contemptuous gaze she wished he hadn’t been quite so exuberant in his gratitude!
* * *
‘So how did you like your first London dinner party?’ Lindsay teased her sister as they lay in bed later that night.
‘It was—interesting,’ Judi answered cautiously.
Her brows rose. ‘I thought you enjoyed yourself. You seemed to be getting on well with Glen.’
‘Yes.’
Lindsay looked across the darkened room to where Judi lay in the adjoining single bed, wondering at the reserve in her sister’s voice. ‘But?’
Judi shrugged. ‘Well, he is married, and I wouldn’t like anyone to have got the wrong idea—’
‘Of course they didn’t,’ she denied laughingly. ‘And what did you think of Malcolm?’ she asked casually.
‘He seemed very nice.’
‘That’s good, because we’re going out with him for the day tomorrow.’
‘Both of us?’
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