“Rob, can I ask you a question and you give me an honest answer?” Laurie asked softly, staring into his handsome face.
Encouraged that she was still talking to him, he readily agreed.
“Have you ever slept with Amber?” she asked looking into his eyes.
Fuck! Goddamn Amber and her mouth.
Not knowing what to say, he said nothing for a moment, hanging his head.
Laurie continued, “And have you… fucked…a lot of women here in town?”
His eyes jerked back to hers, and for the first time in his life, he wished he had been more discriminating and that he had left his fuck-and-run philosophy behind in college. Looking deep into her stormy grey eyes, which were staring back at him expecting honesty, he knew he couldn’t lie.
“Yes, although not as many as you’ve probably heard. But I have a reputation…. and it is probably deserved. But every woman I was with knew it was only physical. I never made any false claims or pretenses. I never made promises. I never met anyone who I wanted to spend time with until tonight. I never met anyone who captured my attention until tonight.” He could hear the desperation in his voice. “Please give me a chance.”
She gave him a soft, sad smile. “Thank you for being honest, Rob. I know that I can’t hold anything against you that occurred before tonight, but I just can’t trust a player. You have no idea how much pain can come from a one-night-stand. A lifetime of doubt.”
He had no idea what she was talking about, but he could feel her slipping away. “Laurie, please.”
“Goodnight, Rob. Goodbye.” And with that, she finished rolling up her window and pulled out of the parking lot.
He couldn’t see the tear sliding down her face. There really are no princes, she though ruefully.
*
Jumping into his truck, he followed at a discreet distance all the way to her apartment. Watching to see her enter safely, he parked outside, needing to think. Getting out of his truck, he walked over to a park bench near the building. It was an odd feeling, evaluating his life and not liking what he saw. In college, when he, Tom, and Jake had been football players, women had thrown themselves at him. The three of them had always enjoyed the favors coming their way, but he was the only one of them that continued that lifestyle when they moved back to Fairfield. Jake did not date often, and when he did, he preferred to meet women that did not live in town. Tom hooked up a lot, but taking a cue from Jake, he tended to have his fuck buddies out of town. Both being policemen, they did not want to hinder any cases by having slept with possible witness or suspects.
Shaking his head, he thought on his own stupidity. He realized now that his actions over the past years had reflected poorly on his parents as well as kept any possible relationship from happening.
A light appeared from an apartment on the third floor. Looking up, he recognized Laurie standing at the window looking out. She was looking into the distance, but even if she looked down, she wouldn’t be able to see him in the dark. He stared at her. Even from where he sat, he could see her beauty. That hair – glossy, thick, long. Funny, instead of thinking of how he would wrap it around his hand when pounding into her, he found himself thinking of a fairytale from his childhood that his elementary teacher would read. Rapunzel. The one who saved the prince.
Shaking his head, he thought he must be losing his mind. Never had a woman had such an effect on him. Fuck, I hope the guys don’t ever get a hint of what I’m thinking!
*
Laurie stood at the window, lost in her thoughts. Rob, the man she’s been dreaming about, the man she thought might be someone worth getting to know, was nothing more than her father. A man, who gave in to his baser instincts with no care as to the repercussions. A man not to be trusted. She wiped a tear from her cheek as she stood at the window looking out into the darkness.
Rob, looking back up as he acknowledged to himself that she was unattainable, was preparing to walk away when he noticed her wiping away her tears. She’s crying, you prick. You did this. But then that thought gave him hope. If she’s crying, that means she’s affected too. Time to change, man. Time to become worthy of her.
Chapter 5
The next week flew by as Laurie went into the school to get ready for the beginning of the school year. She immediately fell in love with the older, two-story, brick building. Fairfield Elementary had served as the junior and high school about fifty years ago. Once the town built a separate middle school and high school, the large building became the elementary school. The ceilings were high, and each classroom had large windows letting in natural light. The kindergarten and first-graders were housed on the second floor near the stairs leading to the cafeteria, while the older students were housed in a separate wing. With the downstairs being partially below ground level, the second floor was only about one-and-a-half floors above the ground, giving her a perfect view of the playground in the back of the building.
She felt an acute anticipation as she and the grade level chairperson walked up the stairs to her classroom, while she turned the room key over in her hand. Moving through the door, her heartbeat pounded as she viewed her room for the first time. Little tables with four chairs at each sat in the middle of the room. Low bookshelves lined the wall under the windows. Cubbies filled the opposite wall, and her desk sat in the corner facing the classroom. Walking over to the windows, she viewed the playground below stretching to the fence guarding the property. My first classroom. My home away from home.
She attended several meetings with other teachers, liking them immediately. She developed an instant rapport with Lucy Darby, the principal. There was so much for her to learn: procedures for lesson plans, the first grade schedule, curriculum requirements, safety drills. Her mind was whirling every day by the time she got home.
She got home about the same time that Carol walked through the door, and they enjoyed their time together. They settled into a congenial camaraderie, cooking dinner and watching TV in the evenings. Occasionally, Tom would join them for dinner and other times he would pick Carol up and they would head out for a date.
Several days after the night at the bar, Carol and Laurie were settled on the couch trying unsuccessfully to find something worth watching on TV. Carol tossed the remote onto the coffee table and turned towards Laurie, tucking her legs under her. She seemed as though she wanted to talk but was having difficulty getting her thoughts together.
Laurie, staring at Carol quizzically, asked, “What’s on your mind, Carol?”
Carol, blushing, looked at Laurie. “That obvious?”
Laurie just laughed, saying, “You’ve been trying for ten minutes to think of how to ask me something. I think we are friends enough by now that you can just ask.”
Sighing, Carol spoke hesitantly. “I was just wondering what you thought of Rob. Well, to be honest, Tom was also wondering. I mean, I can see where you would think he was such a player. I even told you that. But well, there is just something about Rob that is really likeable when you get to know him. And… well… Tom says Rob really likes you.” Carol knew she was rambling, but she wanted to get it all out before Laurie had a chance to shut her down. She glanced back up at Laurie’s thoughtful face, pleased to see that it did not look as though she was angry.
Laurie was thoughtful for a moment, not sure how to answer. Taking a deep breath, she looked back into her friend’s troubled blue eyes. “Carol, I have no right to judge Rob. If he’s a player, then that’s his business. But I assure you, I’m not ever going to be someone’s one-night stand.”
Carol rushed to say that she knew Laurie wouldn’t, but Laurie continued, “And it is more than that. When I am ready to settle down, I need someone stable. Someone who just has eyes for me. Someone who makes me feel as though their whole world is me.” She hesitated, then looked into Carol’s eyes. “Is that too much to ask?”
Carol leaned over and embraced Laurie. “No, that’s not too much to ask.” Leaning back, she asked, “But do you think that Rob i
s incapable of that?”
Laurie, quiet with a sad, faraway look in her eyes, replied, “I don’t know, Carol. But for now, the Rob I met the other night is still too much of a player for me. I would get hurt, and I’m going to protect myself from that.”
“But what if, in protecting yourself, you don’t allow yourself to possibly find that love?”
Laurie, still with a sad look in her eyes, looked away as she said, “It won’t be the first time the handsome prince got away.”
Carol, curious about her cryptic comment, knew that Laurie was not going to explain further. Picking the remote up again, they finally found a movie to watch as they enjoyed the rest of the evening.
*
Rob left work and headed to Tom’s apartment. He felt like he was in middle school but convinced Tom to have Carol question Laurie to see what he needed to do to prove that he had a chance. Walking in to Tom’s house, he settled at the kitchen bar reaching for the beer that Tom was handing to him.
“Okay man, don’t make me beg. What’s the word about Laurie?” Rob asked.
Tom sighed and looked his friend in the eyes. “You know, jerkoff, if you had kept it in your pants more often or at least with some discrimination, you wouldn’t be in this situation.”
Rob looked up at Tom incredulously. “What the hell, man? You’ve slept with just as many women as I have, so how come you’re so sanctimonious?”
“’Cause when I came back to town five years ago, I took a page out of Jake’s book. No town hookups. Too much drama on the job and kept life cleaner!” Tom answered.
“Man, I haven’t hooked up with anyone in a month. Not since I first laid eyes on Laurie,” Rob confessed.
Tom looked surprised, but Rob continued. “Yeah, I saw her at the grocery store the first day she was in town. I didn’t know who she was then, but one look at her rocked my world. I was actually ready to bang some girl I met in the bar after that, but one real look at the skank, all I could think of was how much of a princess Laurie looked like and, man, I swear my dick shriveled!”
Tom, with a raised eyebrow, stated, “Bro, I do not need to know that much about your dick!” The friends shared a laugh. Then silence ensued.
“Seriously, Tom. I can’t think of anything else but her. Please tell me there is some kind of a chance.”
Tom looked thoughtfully at his childhood friend, realizing how much he really wanted to see Rob happy. “The only thing that Carol said was that Laurie had been interested, but it appears that some other dickwad got to her first.”
At that, Rob’s eyes snapped in anger. “What do you mean by that?”
Tom, putting his hands up in front of him, replied, “Don’t shoot the messenger! It’s just that Laurie seemed to indicate that she had been burned before. Don’t know the details but, Rob, you’d better be sure. Laurie is a great girl; nice, sweet, wholesome. The kind that someone wants to create a forever with. She does not deserve to have you dick her over.” Tom could tell that Rob was about to retort, when he continued. “Nor does she deserve to have every pussy you’ve dipped into, constantly in her face when she is out.”
“Damn!” Rob cursed. “So, I’m screwed. I can’t be judged on who I am or who I’m gonna to be, but constantly judged on who I’ve been?” Jumping up from the bar stool, he paced Tom’s living room in frustration.
Tom, now sure of Rob’s genuineness, walked over to his friend, placing his hand on Rob’s shoulder. “Rob, give it time. You keep being real, keep provin’ to her that you’re changin’ and interested, it’ll happen. Won’t say it’ll happen fast. But it’ll happen. Carol and I’ll help.”
Rob looked into the eyes of one of the men he trusted with his life. Nodding in agreement, he thanked Tom and headed out into the night. There was only one place to go when life was kicking you and you needed perspective. Rob drove down the streets to a familiar house. Walking to the door, he knocked rapidly, not ashamed to need the arms of the woman inside. The door opened, and he peered into the eyes that knew him best. Reaching out and pulling him into a hug, the beautiful woman knew exactly what he needed.
“Come on in Rob. You look like you need this,” she said smiling up at him and handing him a beer.
“Thanks Mom. What I really need is you. Is Dad home too? I gotta talk and sort some things out,” Rob said, affectionately looking at his mother.
Smiling, she called into the den. “Mac, turn the TV off. Family time!”
*
Rob sat with his mom and dad and talked for hours. He confessed what they already knew about his reputation. As hard as it was to discuss his sexual transgressions with his parents, it was harder realizing how selfish he had been. It never occurred to him that his mother had had to listen to snide comments over the years from some women coming into her shop. Or that his dad had heard comments as well.
He sat in the den with his parents, feeling completely ashamed and embarrassed. Looking up at them, all he could offer in his defense was, “I never slept with as many women as my reputation. I swear that I would hear of women claimin’ to have been with me, and I knew that had never happened. But I never said anything to correct the misconception. I also never saw it as usin’ anyone. Honestly, whenever I had sex with someone, I always made it clear that it was physical only, and if they weren’t on board with that, then I left.”
Hanging his head, he admitted, “I guess that seems like very little doesn’t it?” Then raising his head back up, looking his parents straight into their eyes, he said, “But making excuses for my past is piss poor. I’m over thirty years old; it’s time to man up.”
Bernie looked at her son with pride, thinking how much he looked like his father. Mac was the best of men and even though Rob didn’t realize it, he was like his father in all ways. Once he gave his heart to a woman, that would be it for him. “Son, it’s not a crime for a man to sow his wild oats. For that matter, it’s not a crime for a woman to do the same.”
This statement brought raised eyebrows from both her son and her husband. Laughing, she just added, “Well, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander!”
Mac and Rob just shook their heads laughing, as Bernie relieved a lot of the stress and tension of the conversation.
Mac, looking at his son, asked, “Rob, what has brought about this sudden desire to look at the kind of man you’ve been and what you want to be? You’re a good man; kind, caring, loving, friendly, competent, loyal. Why the sudden self-doubt?”
Bernie, looking over at the two men in her life, leaned over and patted Rob’s hand. “I think it has everything to do with a long-haired beauty.”
Gazing at his mom, Rob smiled. Mac grumbled that he was the last to hear anything and demanded to be brought into the picture.
Rob began to share about Laurie. He explained about seeing her at the grocery store; then Bernie interrupted to share how she met Laurie with Carol at the shop one day right after Rob had left. He continued on to the night at Smokey’s. He shared everything with his parents, desperately needing their insight. When he got to the part about Amber, both parents winced as though in pain. “Yeah, it went downhill after that,” he admitted. He even told them what Tom had said about Laurie having been hurt before.
“She just needs a chance to see the real you. The part that is not a player, no longer a player,” his dad interjected. Bernie just rolled her eyes at her husband.
“Honey,” she said. “It sounds like she’s being practical. Once burned, she’s not looking to get played again. Your dad is partially right – she does need a chance to see the real you. But that may take time. Are you serious about her? I would encourage you to befriend her first. Then that will give her time to see the real you.”
Rob sat for a few minutes digesting this advice. Friends. Could he be friends with a girl that he wanted to wrap himself around and protect from all hurt? And what if he was the one that caused the hurt?
Knowing he had to give it a try, he kissed his parents goodnight and headed hom
e.
Chapter 6
Laurie greeted the opening of school with great enthusiasm for her class of twenty-four first-graders. Each day she headed off to work, satisfied in the knowledge that she was doing something she loved. For the first month of school, they were required to have a fire drill every week, and she wanted to make a good impression on the principal. She had taught the students exactly what they were to do, how to act, and where to go. In the second week of the new school year, she was not surprised to hear the fire drill alarm. Her class immediately lined up and proceeded outside.
She was surprised though to see a fire truck outside with firefighters around. Her eyes immediately landed on one particular firefighter. Rob. Trying to be unaffected, she couldn’t help but notice his eyes staring straight into hers and his smile directed at her.
Her students began to talk with excitement, seeing the fire trucks. She quickly brought them back to order, and they continued on to their assigned location. At the end of the fire drill, Ms. Darby announced that the class with the best behavior would get to see the fire truck and talk to the firemen. Laurie was pleased when her class was called. Leading the children over to the fire truck, she tried to keep them in order.
Seeing that she was losing control of her class, Rob quickly stepped up. Looking impressive in his fireman’s uniform, he towered over the six year olds.
“All right, everyone, listen up,” he boomed. The children immediately quieted, looking at him with awe. “Only the children who listen to their teacher will get to climb on the fire truck and meet Mr. Mac, the Fire Chief.”
The children all looked to Laurie for instruction. Shooting him a grateful look, she divided them into three groups to rotate among the firefighters and the fire truck. The firemen took each group and began giving tours.
Rob maneuvered Laurie over to the sidewalk. “How have you been?” he asked sincerely, smiling down into her beautiful face. Her long hair was pulled back, and the wind was blowing tendrils all about. In the sunlight he saw that her hair had strands of light brown, dark brown, reddish brown all swirled together. He realized that he had never actually noticed a woman’s hair before. Not like this. Not memorizing its color. Or how the wind swept the loose strands around her face. He fought the urge to bury his hands in it, just to see how it felt. Jesus, get a grip, man.
Laurie's Time (The Fairfield Series) Page 5