“You are right that I don’t think you should trust them,” he said slowly. “But he would be a fool not to see the value in you.”
She felt her head starting to ache again, “What does that mean?”
“Allie…”
“No, for once just speak plainly. I’m tired of trying to decode everything today. Don’t trust them, but understand that they have a good reason to want to use me? Is that it?” She could feel herself getting angry and stopped, taking a deep breath.
“No, Allie, of course not. I mean that I understand why he would be so quick to reach out to you, personally. You are very special…”
“Don’t,” she held up her hand resting her head against the glass. “Just don’t. I’m so completely not in the mood to be fed a line about being the nicest wallflower at the dance after you made it clear no one would bother.” She trailed off feeling the tears she’d fought off all day coming back and threatening to overwhelm her again. She hadn’t meant to bring up his words from the other day after he’d made the effort to reconcile but they hung in the air between them now.
“I’m sorry I said that. It was petty and mean.” He sounded like he meant it and Allie was truly shocked because Bleidd never apologized. Never flat out anyway; his apologies were always round about and hinted at rather than spoken plainly, something she knew well having received many of them over the years after drunken fits. She turned and looked at him, forgetting that he hadn’t seen her since she’d been hurt.
“Oh Allie,” he breathed, truly dismayed. He crossed the room in a few quick steps kneeling down next to her and taking her face gently in his hands. She swallowed hard and tried not to look at the raw emotion on his face, something she didn’t usually see unless he was drunk.
“It’s okay, its already healed a lot compared to yesterday,” she said, trying to sound casual.
He traced his fingers over the fading bruises on her nose and cheek and then down to her throat his eyes darkening. “Whoever did this to you, I will find them, and I will kill them.”
“No,” she said forcefully, grabbing his hand, “No. Promise me you won’t even try, Bleidd. I mean it. They will kill you and I will never forgive myself.”
He shook his head, that dark, dangerous look still in his eye, “You underestimate me.”
“No I don’t but…”she hesitated, unsure how much to tell him. Only when she was sure he was almost certain to go out tonight and get into trouble trying to avenge her did she finish. “…they were elves, Dark Court elves. They would kill you.”
He looked at her sharply, but that wildness was gone from his eyes as suddenly as it had appeared. “What happened?”
“Promise me you won’t look for revenge for me, Bleidd.”
He hesitated but finally, reluctantly, agreed “I swear by the endless sea, the firm earth, and the sky covering all that I will not intentionally seek to avenge your injuries. Now tell me what happened.”
“They came in to the store looking for a book. Said I knew what they wanted but I have no idea what book it could be,” she shook her head swallowing hard. She could feel the tears threatening again and realized she didn’t want to talk about it or think about it anymore. She sniffled, struggling not to cry.
He lifted her chin gently, “It’s okay Allie.”
“No, “she said feeling the tears spilling over. “It’s not. It’s not okay. If I had the damn book I’d have given it to them, but I didn’t know what they were talking about, and they kept saying I did.”
He stood up, pulling her with him into a loose hug and she wept against his t-shirt. “And that was why they hit you? To get you to tell them where this book they sought was?”
She sobbed harder and shook her head. “No, that was my fault.”
“Your fault?” he said incredulously.
“He, he said–he tried to use glamour on me,” she swallowed hard, “and when it didn’t work he said no one refuses him, and I told him to go to the Star…”
She sobbed harder now and he rubbed her back. Motion in the window’s reflective surface caught his eye and he looked up and saw one of the Elven Guard–he assumed Allie’s new lover–standing motionless in the doorway. Before he could decide how to react her arms had tightened around his torso and she kept talking, “And he hit me, and kissed me and threw me down. I couldn’t breathe, he was choking me, and he tore my jeans. I was so scared.”
“Shhhh. You’re safe now Allie,” He whispered, deciding to ignore the Guard until the other elf forced the issue.
“No, I’m not. You don’t understand –” she looked up, her battered face tear stained, and caught sight of the figure in the doorway. Her arms tightened and then she pulled away, wiping her tears furiously. The newcomer walked slowly over to where they stood and Bleidd braced himself to be ordered out. He wasn’t entirely sure how he’d react to that and he knew that getting into a fist fight with Allie’s new love interest, while personally satisfying, would surely upset her a great deal and she was already far too emotionally fragile. He recognized the other elf from his own interrogation as the second in command, someone he remembered with intense dislike. But the Guard did not give any orders, rather he stepped up to where Allie stood until he was almost shoulder to shoulder with Bleidd and said “You did nothing to deserve any of this.”
She shook her head sharply, “I knew it was stupid to insult him. I knew he’d react badly and I did it anyway. I’m weak. I can’t defend myself.”
“Allie,” Bleidd said feeling exasperated, but somewhat grateful that Jessilaen wasn’t trying to push him out. “No one has a right to force you.”
She broke in, her voice bitter, “There is no rape in the Dark Court.”
“What?” Jessilaen said, and Bleidd found himself sharing the other elf’s confusion.
“In the Dark Court, you either enforce your own will, or you have other people’s will enforced on you,” she said. “That’s why my Mother made me leave. She knew I wasn’t strong enough. And she was right.”
“That is barbaric,” Jessilaen said simply.
Allie shook her head. “It’s the law. The human world works because human society is held together by laws, right? The Bright Court works on structures of rank and societal positioning, and relies on laws to support everything. It’s the same in the Dark Court, except the law there is based on structures of power; those who have power out rank those who have less, and on down the line. In the Bright Court if you’re attracted to someone and make a pass at them and they say no, oh well, you go on to the next, right? In the Dark Court when someone who outranks you tells you they want to screw you, you bend over, period. No arguments or questions.”
Jessilaen shook his head and asked sadly. “What kind of childhood did you have?”
“It doesn’t apply to children, children are protected by their parents,” Allie said dismissively. “But once you are an adult–you either have the strength and political connections to protect yourself or you don’t. As far as that Dark Elf was concerned, as a mixed blood I have no inherent rank and no right to refuse him. And I am too weak to enforce my own will.”
“Allie, you are a very strong person. Just because you aren’t a skilled physical fighter doesn’t mean you are weak.” Bleidd said, wishing that he could embrace her again.
Jessilaen added, “And you can learn martial skills; those are merely a matter of practice and time.”
“I–I need to take a shower” Allie said, pushing past both of them towards the bathroom.
Reflexively the two elves looked at each other, momentarily forgetting their past animosity.
“Does she always retreat to the bathroom when she’s upset?” the Guard quipped, and Bleidd had to stop himself from smiling in response.
“So you believe these Dark Court elves will seek her out again?” he said as neutrally as he could manage.
“They told her as much,” Jessilaen replied grimly. Then, giving Bleidd a measuring look, “How long have you been in love
with her?”
Bleidd felt himself stiffening defensively as the other elf continued, “Your feelings for her are obvious.”
“Not to her,” he replied, “but it doesn’t matter. You are just a temporary distraction–you’ll be gone soon enough and everything will be back as it was before.”
“She accepted my court–or didn’t she tell you?” Jessilaen said, pointedly.
Bleidd kept his face blank with an effort, not wanting to betray that he hadn’t already known that. “She doesn’t even know what that means. It may suit you to take advantage of the ignorance of a young girl to your own purpose.”
“She’s an adult” Jessilaen said, although his voice now was less sure
“She’s half Elven; don’t presume it’s so easy to judge her age. Trust me, I made the mistake myself once of assuming a girl who appeared to be an adult actually was one, to my own grief.” He couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice when he spoke.
“You are trying to mislead me so that I will withdraw my court and leave the field to you alone,” Jessilaen said with more confidence.
Bleidd shook his head. “You are no competition. What can you offer her, but a world that will always reject her or see her as an oddity?”
Jessilaen recoiled, clearly angry, “I can offer her more than you. What have you? Not even a name of your own or any honor.”
Bleidd shrugged, “I don’t need any name but the one I have here with her. She knows that the value of my honor is in my actions, not in the opinions of people who don’t even know me. You are a fool if you think she cares about such things.”
“And you see such value in drinking yourself into a stupor every night that you think a woman would choose a lifetime of that? Where were you last night when she needed help? Why did she not reach out to you except that she knew it would be pointless?” Jessilaen’s voice was low and dangerous.
The two elves glared at each other for several minutes, each trying to get the other to look away first. Finally Bleidd took a deep breath and spoke slowly. “Perhaps we are both great fools.”
Jessilaen was caught off guard by this comment and cocked his head to the side listening as Bleidd continued, “We both care for her in some way. And she is not only very upset right now but also in grave danger. If you are right, then those who hurt her yesterday will be back. Whether they return or not, helping with this murder investigation by itself may put her at risk. I would rather put my own pride aside for the moment and see her safe than know that she died because you and I were squabbling like children over a toy.”
The Elven Guard commander gave the Outcast elf a long appraising look, “You truly are innocent of these crimes.”
“I have many flaws, Guard, some of them egregious. But my hands are clean of the blood of those poor girls,” Bleidd said seriously.
“Why did you not simply say as much when we questioned you?” Jessilaen asked, confused by the sudden change in the strange elf. Perhaps living so long with humans has warped his ability to act in a civilized manner, Jess thought to himself, not liking the sudden odd kinship he felt with the other elf, who had made it clear he was a rival for Allie’s affections.
“Because I was wrongly Outcast by the Guard and it is not in my heart now to expect any justice or fairness from anyone in that uniform,” Bleidd said simply. Jessilaen shook his head slightly, unsure how such a thing could ever happen. Bleidd continued, “Know this though Commander; as soon as this danger is past I will offer my own court to her and we shall see who she really prefers. You may not like the outcome of that.”
Jessilaen’s head came up and his eyes narrowed, “Why tell me this now? Why ask for a truce and say that we should work together to protect her and then in the next breath give me reason to want you out of the way?”
“Perhaps I want to see you prove that the Guard are as honest and trustworthy as Allie believes you to be. Show me that you can seek real justice even when it would better suit your own purpose to see me framed for the crime,” Bleidd said casually.
“And if I acted against you, how quickly would that turn her against me?” Jessilaen said.
“If you feel that way, then you acknowledge she cares more for me than you.”
“If the situation were reversed maybe you would be the one who would not like the outcome,” Jessilaen replied. Then he took a deep breath and said “If we wish to cooperate to achieve anything we will have to stop arguing over this.”
Bleidd shook his head ruefully. “Yes. It is obviously a subject we will have to avoid. That said, perhaps I can be of help to you in tracking down these Dark Court elves.”
“How so?” Jessilaen said, not trying to hide his interest.
“Allie has made me promise not to seek revenge for her sake, but I made no oath not to seek them out. I know the city well and I have connections among the residents that you could never hope to reach. If they are here, in the city, I can find them.”
Jessilaen nodded thoughtfully.
****************************
Allie emerged from the shower feeling slightly more able to take on the world and having had her cathartic cry, she felt far less emotionally on edge. She was vaguely worried that Jessilaen would be upset about finding her crying on Bleidd’s shoulder, but he was just going to have to learn to accept that Bleidd was one of her closest friends, and she had no intention of losing that friendship now. Besides, whether Jess understood it or not, Bleidd needed her.
She dressed quickly in the same clothes she’d pulled on that morning, a t-shirt and sweatpants, before venturing out of the bathroom again. To her surprise she found the two elves she’d ducked in the shower to avoid dealing with standing there waiting for her. Her expression must have mirrored her feelings because Bleidd smiled and Jess looked rueful.
“Dinner’s ready. Jason made spaghetti just for you.” Bleidd said in a conciliatory tone.
Jess gave him an odd sideways look “I thought we were all eating?”
Allie couldn’t hold back a giggle as Bleidd explained “It’s an expression, Guard. It means he knows it’s one of her favorite foods and cooked it special to please her.”
Jess looked truly confused, “Is he a servant here? He always seems to be cooking for everyone else.”
Allie was shaking her head, still giggling, but Bleidd looked annoyed “Of course not, he just enjoys cooking.”
Jess clearly thought that was insane, but Allie’s stomach chose that moment to growl loudly and the other two seemed to snap out of whatever strange mood they were in. If she didn’t know better she’d swear they were acting like friends. It was a strange thought. “Come on guys you can argue the semantics of human idioms later. I’m actually hungry for the first time today and spaghetti sounds really good right about now.”
She moved past them and down the stairs, feeling almost cheerful for the first time in over a week. The aroma of Jason’s excellent spaghetti sauce filled the lower level and made her mouth water. In the kitchen she found Liz and Aeyliss sitting at the table while Jason shuttled plates and dishes from the counter to the various place settings and Syndra poured drinks into glasses. The Victorian’s kitchen was spacious and the table was a long farm style set with a dozen chairs that could easily accommodate the residents and the two Elven Guard. Allie felt herself relaxing slightly at the domestic scene, strange as it was to see the red haired Elven woman, sword strapped to her side, sitting at the table. She moved to sit in her usual place on the hallway side of the long table and before she could pull her seat in she had Jess settling in on her right and Bleidd sliding into the chair on her left. She looked from one side to the other, puzzled that with so many seating options they’d each choose to sit directly next to her, and caught Syndra across the room rolling her eyes. Liz, sitting at the far narrow end of the table frowned and then made a point of studying her silverware. Allie felt bad for her cousin, who she knew was a private person and was probably horrified by the intrusion into her home. Then again Al
lie realized her cousin hadn’t seen her since she’d been injured. Maybe she’s upset at seeing my fabulous multi-colored face, Allie thought, then, I wonder why she never came and saw me in my room today? It was an uncomfortable thought that she quickly pushed away.
Jason hustled over with a plate, smiling at her and ignoring the bruises. She smiled back.
“Awesome Jason, this looks great.”
“I put extra cheese on yours,” he said winking.
“Because I’m extra cheesy, right?” and they both laughed. It made things feel almost normal.
Syndra brought over the drinks: milk for Allie and the two Elven Guard, juice for Jason, water for Liz and beer for herself and Bleidd. Much to everyone’s surprise Bleidd turned down the beer, getting a glass of milk instead. Syndra was speechless at this turn of events and kept giving Allie weird looks, which Allie returned with frowns and shrugs. She had a feeling that she’d get an earful from Syn later. Both the Guards were poking at their food uncertainly and she wondered if they had ever eaten spaghetti before. Instead of asking what it was or how one went about eating it they started surreptitiously watching the humans eat and mimicking them. Allie found herself smiling down at her plate as Syndra and Jason argued over the merits of the latest album from their favorite band.
“Are your meals always like this?” Jess asked her.
“On a good day.”
“What a strange way to enjoy a meal.” Aeyliss said when she finished eating. “Everyone talking–how can you enjoy your food?”
“We enjoy the food in between talking.” Jason answered cheerfully. Despite his near phobia of elves he seemed to have gotten somewhat acclimated to the Guard’s presence.
She gave him an appraising look that had Allie thinking the Elven woman was about to be disappointed. “Is it not better to focus all your attention on one thing at a time so that you can savor that experience to its fullest, rather than distracting the senses with many things at once?”
Murder Between the Worlds: A Between the Worlds Novel Page 11